Big surprise! Abstinence-only sex ed doesn’t work.
Big surprise! It’s a huge waste of money.
Big surprise! 4 billion years of evolution in making every living thing on this plant successful because of our collective ability to procreate beats out religiously motivated wishful thinking. Who could have possibly known? (Certainly not anyone who thinks that Jesus solves all your problems.)
Big surprise! It was all just a way for the religious right to get money from its shills in the government. Sadly, this blatant and obvious corruption at the expense of our youth will likely never be punished. I, for one, would like my tax money back on this one.
We’ve been saying this stuff all along, but nobody listens to us atheists. We’re immoral.