On the subject of how feminism can do better to help men, one suggestion I’ve heard many times, is that we need to provide better role models for men.
Honest question: what does that even mean? I don’t understand what “role model” is, why I would want one, or how it would solve anything. To me, “Who are your role models?” is a writing prompt they give you in elementary school, which was endlessly frustrating and never made the least bit of sense.
My frustration is compounded when people go on to suggest specific celebrities to be role models. For example, “Terry Crews is a great guy, and a great model for 21st century masculinity.” So, I know Terry Crews as someone who has done work against sexual violence, but that doesn’t make him a role model to me. I’m confused about how that would even work. Are you suggesting that I follow news about Terry Crews and imitate what little I can glean of his viewpoints and habits? The solution to the crisis of masculinity is… more celebrity news? Color me skeptical.