BREAKING NEWS: Jason Kenney lies.


Listen, certain political pundits who shall not be named figured out United Conservative Party leadership candidate Jason Kenney’s number a while ago. He’s not exactly subtle. If the news wants to hire a pundit that’s actually correct about things, they can pay me their mediocre white dude’s salary:

United Conservative Party leadership candidate Brian Jean on Wednesday accused Jason Kenney’s campaign team of spreading lies about him.

“My vision is a positive vision and I believe a positive vision is what most Albertans, including millennials, want,” Jean said during a UCP leadership debate in Fort McMurray.

The latter remark is a bit of a stretch given that millennials have been straining under the pressure of boomer greed our entire lives, but okay Jean.

“You see, they’re sick and tired of politicians lying about each other.

I don’t really care about what they do to each other, actually. I’m sick of them lying to me.

In fact, right now there is a politician on this stage that his team is lying about me, lying about my Christian values, lying about my position on Bill 6 … even lying about other things.”

When asked after the debate about Jean’s remarks, Kenney said he had no idea what his opponent was talking about.

Jean confirmed after the debate he was referring to Kenney’s campaign. He said someone on Kenney’s team has also falsely alleged he is against gun owners.

“I don’t think anybody else has rifles here except for me,” Jean said. “I’ve had them most of my life.”

Only in a Conservative leadership race could “look at all my guns” be a relevant talking point.

“If he has a particular complaint about something, he should say what it is, but we’ve been running a positive campaign. I’m proud of that,” Kenney said.

FACT CHECK: No he fucking hasn’t.

Jean has said he is a “church-going, God-fearing Baptist” who attended a Christian high school prior to university.

There is no part of that sentence that doesn’t make me gag. Didn’t Jean get the memo the millennials are the gayest godless generation yet?

The winner will be announced Oct. 28.

Theocrat or kleptocrat. Such inspiring politics.

-Shiv