The Most Prayingest Prez Ever.


Flauros is a strong Great Duke of Hell, having thirty-six legions of demons under his rule. He gives true answers of all things past, present and future, but he must be first commanded to enter a magic triangle for if not he will lie, deceive the conjurer, and beguile him in other business. But if he enters the triangle he will answer truly, and gladly speak about divinity, the creation of the world, himself, and other fallen angels. He can also destroy all the conjurer's enemies by burning them up. If the magician requests it, he will not suffer temptations from any spirit or in any form. Flauros is depicted as a terrible and strong leopard that under request of the conjurer changes into a man with fiery eyes and an awful expression. Flauros can also supposedly be called upon when a mortal wishes to take vengeance on other demons. This is likely included in his capability to destroy the conjurer's enemies.

Flauros is a strong Great Duke of Hell, having thirty-six legions of demons under his rule. He gives true answers of all things past, present and future, but he must be first commanded to enter a magic triangle for if not he will lie, deceive the conjurer, and beguile him in other business. But if he enters the triangle he will answer truly, and gladly speak about divinity, the creation of the world, himself, and other fallen angels. He can also destroy all the conjurer’s enemies by burning them up. If the magician requests it, he will not suffer temptations from any spirit or in any form. Flauros is depicted as a terrible and strong leopard that under request of the conjurer changes into a man with fiery eyes and an awful expression. Flauros can also supposedly be called upon when a mortal wishes to take vengeance on other demons. This is likely included in his capability to destroy the conjurer’s enemies.

Today, we have self-styled prophet Mark Taylor (again), and Carl Gallups. We’ll start with Mr. Taylor, as he provided the subject line for this post.

Taylor told host Perry Atkinson that Mary Colbert, with whom he authored his book “The Trump Prophecies,” is a part of Trump’s evangelical advisory board and that Trump recently told this group that “when he leaves office, he wants his legacy to be that he wants to be known as the most praying president in American history.”

Has anyone seen the Tiny Tyrant praying outside of a few photo ops? It’s very difficult for me to imagine Trump saying that, close to impossible, really. I doubt Trump wants a legacy of appearing to be submissive to a god.

Taylor went on to assert that Trump’s name-calling and personal attacks on his critics are no different than what Jesus did.

“I’ve seen evangelicals attack this man over how he attacks people or how he speaks to people or he’ll call people names,” Taylor said. “Well, read your Bible folks, the Lord Jesus himself called people names.”

Yes, Jesus had his moments, mostly with hypocritical, corrupt assholes. Wait…

Taylor said that America is in such “a huge mess” that God realized that it was going to take someone “with a very heavy hand” like Trump to turn things around, which means that those who are criticizing Trump are actually criticizing God.

“God himself is using Donald Trump,” Taylor said. “It’s God that is doing it, He’s just doing it through Donald Trump.”

No, I’m afraid ol’ Yahweh isn’t doing shit, Mr. Taylor. This is magical thinking in action. Until you folks can point to something which is obviously, unequivocally the work of a god,* I can’t be arsed to pay much attention. (Then you have to figure out which god, out of the thousands. Fun times!)

Moving on to Carl Gallups, who is sticking with old school: birtherism. I still can’t believe that’s a word.

Carl Gallups, a right-wing pastor and conspiracy theorist who spoke at Trump campaign rallies during the 2016 election and who served as a “special deputy” on disgraced sheriff Joe Arpaio’s “Cold Case Posse” investigation into President Obama’s birth certificate, said last night that President Trump is “getting his ducks in a row” to finally expose Obama’s phony birth certificate, despite efforts by the “deep state” to intimidate him into silence with the Russia investigation.

Appearing on “The Hagmann Report” last night, Gallups said that Arpaio’s contempt conviction earlier this year was nothing more than an effort to discredit his birther investigation but Trump is “now in the White House, he now holds the power, he now holds the reins” and so he pardoned Arpaio because he is getting ready to blow the lid off the “earth shattering” scandal.

Why don’t these people ever get tired of this shit? Apparently, they have no problem with being bored to death, or boring others to death. Trump pardoned fellow sociopath Arpaio because he thinks Arpaio is a good guy, a fine person, like all those nazis. It’s not because there’s an “earth shattering” revelation in the offing. Even if you posit this nonsense as trufax, what would be the point? You can’t rewind the last eight years, and the Idiot King has already wrought devastation on most of the good policies which were in place. So really, who would care?

“I’m convinced that Donald Trump is probably getting his ducks in a row to bring this to the forefront,” Gallups said.

Donald. Getting his ducks in a row. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Has anyone drawn Trump as Donald Duck yet? Oh, yes!

That was a nice distraction.

“All of these sham investigations that they have going on on him—there is no evidence that he did anything with Russia to sway to sway our election, but I’m telling you, it’s all a big smokescreen and shots across his bow to say, ‘Don’t you touch this birth certificate.’”

Oh FFS. There’s a mountain of evidence, and it keeps getting bigger and bigger. One might say Yuuuuuuuge or Bigly! On top of the evidence, the fucking idiot keeps incriminating himself, with help from his idiotic spawn.

Via RWW: Taylor, Gallups.

Comments

  1. rq says

    What is “an awful expression”: disgust? anger? a clownish grimace? Perhaps Flaurosis just constantly surprised in the middle of his afternoon nap.
    As for god, well, all these demons seem a lot more sensible and approachable. Smarter, too.

  2. says

    rq:

    As for god, well, all these demons seem a lot more sensible and approachable. Smarter, too.

    Yes. Surprises me all these latter day prophets don’t get involved in the Lesser Key of Solomon, because it was primarily christians who saw fit to summon demons.

    Perhaps if they were spending time trying to summon demons and angels, they wouldn’t be so bothersome.

  3. busterggi says

    Flaurosis needs a little catnip, he’ll mellow right out.

    Meanwhile the TRUTH about Obama WILL eventually come out, even if it takes two thousand years like the last great Christian prophecy.

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