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Aug 09 2013

Not begging for my LGBT/ Human Rights does not make me Aggressive, just Assertive. Deal with it! Part 1

Wow, that was one very hot debate. During the debate someone even tweeted that i was behaving like a thug, funny. I wonder why many think gays, lesbians, bisexuals and Trans should be apologetic when asking for rights. I DEMAND my human right, not beg for it.

I am often called aggressive, confrontational and too loud for speaking out for LGBT Rights. It seems one is expected to be humble when asking for rights that others already enjoy. Lesbians, gays, bisexuals, Trans and Intersex are expected to meekly ask for the same rights their fellow citizens enjoy. When you don’t meekly beg for your rights, you are called aggressive, confrontational and “a loudmouth, disrespectful bitch”, as I have been called.

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Homophobes especially, religious homophobes are often pissed off that I do not beg to be treated equally, but demand and assert that I must be treated equally.

It amuses me when people are quick to advise that I should not get ‘angry’ or passionate when asserting LGBT rights as human rights. Some have even claimed that I hurt the cause when I assert that lgbt rights are human rights rather than beg for the acceptance of Lgbts as humans.  Really, I have to beg you to accept I am a human being because my sexual orientation is different from yours?

  •  Why do people think I have to seat down sedately and humbly while they read out a long list from their bible on why I should not be treated as a human being?
  •  Why do they think I should listen carefully and silently when they inform me about how their religion and culture does not support my LGBT rights?
  •  Why must I listen humbly while they ramble on about how I am not human enough to enjoy same rights they enjoy as a human being?
  •  Why do you think I am being disrespectful when I interrupt your tirade about how human rights do not apply to gays, lesbians, bisexuals and Trans?

Some even claim that it is disrespectful to blacks to compare the discrimination LGBTs are facing to slavery and racism. They get all angry when LGBT rights activists and movements are compared to Civil liberty rights activists and movements. They are probably confused because they do not walk in the shoes of Lesbians, gays, bisexuals and Trans. The many lesbians, gays, bisexual and trans whom are daily discriminated against, abused, harassed , tortured and even killed for their sexual orientation or gender identity knows better.

I face a 14 years imprisonment for my sexual orientation; I face 10 years imprisonment for advocating for gay rights and I face the possibility of being lynched for identifying as a bisexual. You don’t call that discrimination? You don’t think this an inhumane way to treat anyone? You think I am being dramatic? I think even if you do not walk in my shoes, you need to learn what empathy is.

Imagine that you are a black person who is being constantly told by a white person that you are subhuman because of your skin colour, do you meekly explain to them that you are human or do you get angry enough to sue their racist asses?

If in this age and time, I still have to convince people that LGBTs are human beings, that we are persons too, then do not be surprised when once in a while I get tired of your ignorance and just told you to grow a brain!  I do not need to defend my Personhood to anyone; I just need to call the homophobes, biphobes and transphobes out on their ignorance.

  •  It is not my duty to convince you that I am human.
  • It is not my duty to seat down and listen to your rants about how I am not human enough.
  • It is not my duty to listen to you explain to me how your God says I am an abomination because of my sexual orientation.
  • It is not my duty to humbly listen to you as you ignorantly claim that your culture does not support LGBT rights.
  • It is not my duty to sit down and listen to you quote Leviticus as a reason why I should be stoned to death, especially not if you are wearing polyesters which BTW same Leviticus condemns.
  • It is not my duty to sit meekly while you inform me that I am not human enough to enjoy my inalienable human rights.

However,

  • It is my duty to stop you in your ignorant track by telling you to shut the fuck up!
  • It is my duty to humanity to never let bigots go unchallenged when they claim that a human being is subhuman because s/he is different.
  • It is my human duty to forcefully speak out against bigotry and ignorance.
  • It is my duty to never let such remarks go unchallenged because the world has had enough of such bigotry and ignorance. Civilization does not need you to drag us backwards into the Dark Age. I have no apology for cutting you down to your miserable size because you truly need to grow a brain.

No black person of dignity would sit calmly while a white person tells him/her “You are sub human”. It is the same way I feel about sexual orientation. Everybody wants me to be calm while they tell me i am not human enough to enjoy the same human rights they enjoy because I am gay, lesbian, bisexual, Trans. They expect  LGBTs to sit down, appeal to them and calmly try to convince them that LGBTs are Humans too. WTF!

Of course I am human, entitled to human rights if you don’t get that, it is your fucking shit to deal with, your ignorance should not be my headache. And I have every right to scream at you if you called me less than human, if that makes me a thug, well, i guess Martin Luther King, Rosa Parks and Gani Fawehinmmi were all thugs, in fact Nelson Mandela was called a terrorist.  In which case I am happy to be called a thug cos it looks like I am in good company!

Just remember:

I am ASSERTIVE not AGGRESSIVE
I am FACTUAL not CONFRONTATIONAL
If you do not like the TRUTH, Do not peddle LIES
If you can’t take the HEAT, Do not start a FIRE
Hiding under your bed won’t save you from the TRUTH or my logic boot

LOUDMOUTH BITCH 941411_10151608187783704_423354122_n

Related Link- Not begging for my LGBT/Human Rights does not make me Aggressive, just Assertive. Deal with it! Part 2

18 comments

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  1. 1
    smhll

    This is terrific! Even though I am an overprivileged straight cis white woman, I have encountered the same judging and obstructive attitude about “being nice”. It is utterly infuriating to hear a more privileged person say something like “Well, some of the words in your sentences weren’t perfectly nice, and I don’t like how you spoke to me, so I won’t support your movement to have full human rights and dignity.”

    I agree that the right response to that is “fuck off”. All human beings should have full human rights and dignity. A person who shuts down his empathy and thinks he can deny freedom and justice to other people because of the phrasing of their statements is truly an asshole who lets his own pride and self-regard and prejudices negate his senses of fairness and empathy.

    It is infuriating when one person feels free to withhold or obstruct rights for others. Anyone who is on the receiving end of this treatment is going to be damn mad. Like — “Why the hell do you think you have the right to block my rights because there is some little (or big) thing about me that you disapprove of? Why do my rights depend on your whims?”

  2. 2
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @smhll:

    Why do my rights depend on your whims?”

    And that is exactly it. Why should the recognition of my human rights depend on the whims and caprices of another? Makes no sense and it is a perfect reason to say ‘fuck off”

  3. 3
    culuriel

    Your ending would be an awesome stand alone free-verse poem. It never fails to amaze me that the majority thinks it is naturally entitled to deprive others of rights, and all complaints should be a “non-threatening” as possible. The majority never has to defend any of its rights to anyone else, why should the minorities they want to oppress have to????

  4. 4
    Tsu Dho Nimh

    Excellent.

    Much the same was said to my grandmother, the suffragette. She was expected to sit quietly and meekly petition for the right to vote.

  5. 5
    lucabracee

    while you absolutely have a right to your sexuality,the way you go about it or debate your rights to a large extent reflects on the rest of gay and lesbians.
    personally i was one of those who tweeted about your conduct and it had nothing to do with you being gay,if i anything i think it has a lot to do with not imbibing the british way of doing things.we are all Nigerians but having come to this country we realise one handles issues better in a calm,articulate and matured way.

    the reason for this is precisely what is happening,your conduct will overshadow the real important issues you are clamouring for.i personally dont remember much of the points you made,all i remember was the abrasive way you were interjecting the points of the other guests,your belligerence and border line rudeness.

    rather than you admitting your conduct fell way below par,you are still arrogantly justifying it.you are a bad example for the gay and lesbians and i will just advise you to change your approach respect,acknowledge other people marshall your points calmly and in a non abrasive manner.
    if you think the way you act is the proper way of going about it,then i suggest you watch gay and lesbian activists who are from this part of the world.dont allow the negative stereotype the westerners have of black women irrespective of sexuality be manifested in you”Angry black female”

  6. 6
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @lucabracee :

    i think it has a lot to do with not imbibing the british way of doing things.we are all Nigerians but having come to this country we realise one handles issues better in a calm,articulate and matured way

    Are you by any means saying naturally, Nigerians do not handle things in a “calm,articulate and matured way”?
    That Nigerians need to come live in Britain and imbibe the Britain culture so that they learn to handle things “in a calm,articulate and matured way.”?
    Gawd, that is so sick and a blatant expose of the state of your mental slavery!

    i personally dont remember much of the points you made,all i remember was the abrasive way you were interjecting the points of the other guests,your belligerence and border line rudeness

    You can hardly blame me for your inability to understand or assimilate my points. One can only lead a person to knowledge; but we can’t force them to think. I provided the knowledge loudly enough, you do your thinking.

    As for my co debater, he had no problem recollecting my points and we did have a nice exchange after the program. So why exactly are you pissed?
    It most probably had to do with your discomfort with my “abrasive” ‘attacks’ on religion, especially since the only altercation I had with my co debater was to call him out on Cherry picking the bible and the shit Leviticus says. BTW, watch out for part 2 of this post, I got this covered already.

    if you think the way you act is the proper way of going about it,then i suggest you watch gay and lesbian activists who are from this part of the world

    As it even occurred to you that we probably do not adore same kind of people?
    You mean you’d rather I act the way YOU prefer me to act? You want me to learn to act all ‘Proper’ like the way the westerners you adore act? Hmm… interesting. You know what? If these westerners ever need a laboratory monkey or Labrador to potty train, I will be sure to send them your way. As it is, some of us are proud to be who we are cos we are not copycats. And why be a copycat, when we are at our best as the original, not a counterfeit. Methinks you got serious complex issues going on, just don’t portray your insecurities on me.

    Hmm, you also want me to “calmly and in a non abrasive manner.” “respect, acknowledge” “the points of people who argue that I am less than human because of my sexual orientation. Well, I think the right word for you is “if you are trying to be a clown, do not quit your day job , cos you suck.

    dont allow the negative stereotype the westerners have of black women irrespective of sexuality be manifested in you”Angry black female”

    Of course I am an “Angry black female” and bisexual to boot, if you have a problem with that, feel free to go jump off the cliff. Just before jumping off, you might like to read this blog post link below, cos something about your comment reminds me of what some misguided people said about Rachel Jeantel and their ignorant accusation that she validates the angry black woman stereotype. Hope you learn a thing or two before trying to mould another black woman in your stereotypical image. http://freethoughtblogs.com/yemmynisting/2013/06/28/rachel-jeantel-is-not-on-trial-judging-her-accent-is-a-show-of-your-ignorance-not-hers/

  7. 7
    Joe G.

    Love the “It’s not my duty” and “It is my duty” lists. Good advice and counsel for those who have to deal with social inequities in the societies they live in.

    It is not my duty to seat down and listen to you quote Leviticus as a reason why I should be stoned to death, especially not if you are wearing polyesters which BTW same Leviticus condemns.

    Perfect! :)

  8. 8
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Joe G.- Glad you loved the list. BTW, you just indirectly drew my attention to an edit i should make, that quote should read “sit down”, not “seat down”. Off to make the edit, thanks. :)

  9. 9
    Maddie

    In the words of Demond Tutu: “I would not worship a homophobic God. I feel as strongly about this as I did about apartheid.” Keep belligerently demanding rights for people who should rightfully already have them. Somebody needs to.

  10. 10
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    Maddie!! Once a gem, always a gem. :) :) :)

  11. 11
    Lucabracee

    Again you are exhibiting the same overbearing belligerence even now, the tone of your reply to what should be a personal opinion of mine shows I probably would have kept quiet if we were standing face to face .however I will refrain from indulging in your juvenile and frankly immature verbal barbs in order not to detract from either my point or the issue in general,feel free to continue abusing and brow beating anyone who dares to share a contrary view with you it’s real classy and mature.

    I am not one of those people who needs anyone to validate their “religiosity” and my own Christianity teaches me to accept everyone irrespective. my immediate colleague and one of my closest friend to boot is gay and my tweets,write ups are there to show my stance on gay and lesbian rights so don’t even try to spring that line on me.

    The reason I used the Uk as an instance is because we are both resident here presently and yea absolutely the way you approached issues is exactly how a typical NIG or even African handle critiques in addition any contrary view is seen as being a hater.from your retort its very obvious that the only way of imparting knowledge or your own point of view is to force feed or ram in down the throats of people,I hope you realise insults verbal barbs no matter how abrasive is not a substitution for substance to back or shore up your argument.

    It’s obvious you are set in your ways but I only dropped my comment for the benefit of non Nigerians who might have watched the programme or come across your article to realise your abrasive confrontational Nd belligerent way of approaching issues is your own exclusive and personal way and has nothing to do with the rest of us both straight and gay

    On a last note I hope you patently realise that in a quest to assert your own fundamental rights to be a bisexual,you are in the process not only denigrating but muscling in on and trampling on others human rights as well.i wonder when a campaign for recognition and acknowledgement of gay rights became an anti Christian one?
    Pls clarify your position for the benefit of your readers because it seems you are more focused on the perceived ills of he bible than on gay issues which I thought was your primary aim
    Lastly I hope with your borderline extreme views you won’t burn any gay or lesbian who dares to label themselves a devout Christian with this much misplaced angst

  12. 12
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Lucabracee

    feel free to continue abusing and brow beating anyone who dares to share a contrary view with you it’s real classy and mature

    You are angry cos I ain’t politely begging you to recognize that LGBT rights as Human rights? Gosh, how else do I spell it to you that my human rights should never be in dispute?

    my immediate colleague and one of my closest friend to boot is gay

    Hmm… actually that is just like saying I am not racist because my best friend is black. It is a tired, overused and now very ridiculous as well as ignorant line. Try again, cos that was an epic fail!

  13. 13
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Lucabracee:

    It’s obvious you are set in your ways but I only dropped my comment for the benefit of non Nigerians who might have watched the programme or come across your article to realise your abrasive confrontational Nd belligerent way of approaching issues is your own exclusive and personal way and has nothing to do with the rest of us both straight and gay

    Still basically sayin… Dear westerners, please ignore this angry black woman, i apologize that her action is validating the ‘Angry black woman” stereotype. We Nigerians and generally black Africans don’t behave like her. She does not represent a polite, demure version of us, in fact we disown her. ROTFLMAO!

    You most probably have passed that Laboratory Monkey ass licking training I suggested earlier. Gosh, learn to lose your mental chains, of course we are all different, and wow I am glad not to be like you. So save yourself the asslicking breath, you sound pathetic.

  14. 14
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Lucabracee:

    On a last note I hope you patently realise that in a quest to assert your own fundamental rights to be a bisexual,you are in the process not only denigrating but muscling in on and trampling on others human rights as well

    Whao! My bisexuality infringes on your human rights? Pray, tell me how does the gender of the person I love or sleep with infringe on your human right or make your life miserable?

    Now read this carefully:

    When Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals and Trans demand for the same rights you already enjoy, this does not take away your rights, it only means you can no longer impose your bigotry and ignorance on LGBTs.
    Got it? Good.

  15. 15
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Lucabracee:

    i wonder when a campaign for recognition and acknowledgement of gay rights became an anti Christian one?

    Hmm, let’s see…
    That would be the moment Christians went to the National Assembly to demand that Nigerian Gays be imprisoned for 14 years.

    Or probably when the Catholics and Anglicans threatened to beat up my fellow LGBT activists right inside the Senate room?

    Hmm.. Well, it could also be the moment Christians throw Leviticus at gays to justify why gays should be stoned to death?

    Actually, so many reasons and moments, but you truly aren’t a bright one, are you?

    Anyway, FYI, I am not just Anti CHRISTIAN, I am Anti CHRISTIANITY, basically I am Anti RELIGION, which makes me Anti-Theism. But feel free to call me an ATHEIST. You do know what that means don’t you? Feel free to Google it.

    Just remember , as long as theists (btw, that include your fellow Christians),seek to impose their religious beliefs on me or in the state constitution, law and policies, there will be no rest for the wicked.

    However when you learn to just worship your Skydaddy and make that your personal affair, without dragging me or the State into your personal relationship with Jesus, we are good. :)

  16. 16
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @Lucabracee:

    Lastly I hope with your borderline extreme views you won’t burn any gay or lesbian who dares to label themselves a devout Christian with this much misplaced angst

    Oh poor dear, have no fear, NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN BURNT OR STONED TO DEATH BY AN ATHEIST ON ACCOUNT OF WHOM THEY WORSHIP. On the contrary, history is replete with instances of how Christians like you have burnt and keep burning, beheading beating and torturing Gays, lesbians and bisexuals and Trans to death.

    Now, go have a word with your fellow Christians about that, maybe just maybe, you can convince them to choose being a decent human being over their belief in a misogynist, homophobic, egomaniac and sadistic God. That is worth a try, for the sake of humanity. Ciao!

  17. 17
    MissinPost

    “Oh poor dear, have no fear, NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN BURNT OR STONED TO DEATH BY AN ATHEIST ON ACCOUNT OF WHOM THEY WORSHIP. On the contrary, history is replete with instances of how Christians like you have burnt and keep burning, beheading beating and torturing Gays, lesbians and bisexuals and Trans to death. ”

    Hahahahah. How ignorant are you?

    Educate yourself:

    wiki/League_of_Militant_Atheists
    wiki/Terrible_Triangle
    wiki/USSR_anti-religious_campaign_(1917–1921)
    wiki/USSR_anti-religious_campaign_(1921–1928)
    wiki/USSR_anti-religious_campaign_(1928–1941)
    wiki/USSR_anti-religious_campaign_(1958–1964)
    wiki/USSR_anti-religious_campaign_(1970s–1990)

    Here’s a few highlights -- so you can’t ever (honestly) say you’ve never heard of atheist murders again:

    In the first five years after the Bolshevik revolution, an English journalist estimated that 28 bishops and 1,215 priests were executed.[53][54] Recently released evidence indicates over 8,000 were killed in 1922 during the conflict over church valuables.[53]

    “In the Don region in February 1918 the Reds were killing every priest they could find.[9] An 80-year old monk-priest named Amvrosi was beaten with rifle butts before being killed. A priest named Dimitri was brought to a cemetery and undressed, but when he tried to cross himself before being killed, a soldier chopped off his right arm. An old priest who tried to stop the execution of a peasant was beaten and cut to pieces with swords. In the Holy Saviour Monastery, Red soldiers arrested and killed the 75-year-old abbot by scalping him and beheading him. In the Kherson province a priest was crucified. In a Kuban Cossack village an eighty-year-old priest was forced to wear women’s clothing, brought to the village square and ordered to dance; when he refused, he was hanged.[11]”

    And that’s from five minutes googling and only covers one of many atheist states.

    You need to get your facts in order and reconsider your position, but I doubt you’ll do more than delete this post/just ignore the fuck out of the fact you have a silly belief that coincidentally condemns “the other” and praises your own -- without considering how you came to this ignorant propagandistic bigoted belief.

    But by all means, tell us again how Religionists are just totes evil and particularly murderous whereas “logical” “superior” atheists never do anything bad.

  18. 18
    Yemisi Ilesanmi

    @MissinPost:

    In the first five years after the Bolshevik revolution

    And when exactly did Bolshevik revolution translates to Atheist Revolution?

    “In the Don region in February 1918 the Reds were killing every priest they could find

    And in what universe does “ the Reds” or the Red Army as they were known translate to the Atheists or The Atheists Army?

    “And that’s from five minutes googling and only covers one of many atheist states”.

    You really need to put on a thinking cap when you desperately google things you wish would support your ignorant claims. There are no Atheists States, just Secular States. A Secular State is not an Atheist State.

    Revolutions, crimes or wars carried out in the name of communism, Stalinism or in the fight for separation of State and Religion does not equate Atheism. Atheism is not an economy ideology and it definitely isn’t a belief. Atheism is a NON-BELIEF, however I doubt if you’d comprehend this as you frantically hunch over googling for articles that support your delusion that Atheism is a belief trying to make itself superior to other beliefs.

    But by all means, tell us again how Religionists are just totes evil and particularly murderous whereas “logical” “superior” atheists never do anything bad.

    Now, that is the crust of your ignorance. Atheists are not automatically good people because they do not have a God delusion. Atheists are like every other human being, capable of doing good and bad, only without the God delusion. Now, the fact is NO atheist in recorded history has killed or stoned anyone to death in the name of NON BELIEF IN GOD (Atheism). Now, feel free to frantically google this for the rest of the day. On the other hand, I do not need to do a Google search before I am confronted with the atrocities committed in the name of a belief in a God. I am surrounded by the evidence. Religion does not even need me to ridicule it; it does so all by itself, especially in its holy books and through the actions of its believers following their Skydaddy’s instructions.

    As I am not interested in teaching you the difference between Communism/Stalinism and Atheism, I won’t be entertaining your ignorance on the subject of Bolshevik revolution.

  1. 19
    Not begging for my LGBT/Human Rights does not make me Aggressive, just Assertive. Deal with it! Part 2 » YEMMYnisting

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