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Feb 27 2012

Apparently, Santorum Doesn’t Think Jesus Can Protect Him

The AP reported yesterday that Santorum will be getting Secret Service protection. Doesn’t he think Jesus will protect him if he wants him to be president?

“MILNER, Ga. — Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum is expected to get Secret Service protection Tuesday, according to an administration official with knowledge of the plan.”

Gingrich has also given up on the protection of his lord and savior and requested human protection.

“The campaign of former House Speaker Newt Gingrich requested Secret Service protection last week and is awaiting word on whether he will receive the security, a person close to the campaign said Sunday.”

13 comments

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  1. 1
    Al Stefanelli

    Pffft, nobody can be protected against the Kracken! (Figure if you’re gonna have a make-believe diety fight for you, might as well make it a good one – now, where the hell is that Perseus Kid??)

  2. 2
    unbound

    Well, if Jesus isn’t going to protect the Pope (since he goes around in the bullet-proof Popemobile), why would he look to protect someone lower in the food chain?

  3. 3
    d cwilson

    Wait, I thought Jesus wanted Herman Cain to be president? Or was it Rick Perry? Maybe it was Michele Bachmann.

    Damn, that Jesus is one fickle dude.

  4. 4
    reasonbeing

    Is professional protection allowed by the bible…Jesus didn’t have that…I mean shouldn’t Rick believe that if it is his time, then surely nothing the Secret Service can do could thwart the will of god! Rubbish. Also, I thought Rick was against protection or does that just hold true for condoms?

  5. 5
    bahrfeldt

    He believes only in pandering for votes and money

  6. 6
    Don F

    It’s to protect him from Christians, obviously. I mean, a majority of murderers in prison are Christian, so that’s clearly where the treat would be from.

  7. 7
    Moggie

    Maybe he believes those Secret Service agents are angels?

  8. 8
    Randomfactor

    Because Rick Santorum IS Jesus.

    Think about it…have you ever seen the two of them together?

  9. 9
    Goomba

    Well, color me surprised! Not even The Pope depends on god to protect him. So why should we expect these clowns to.

  10. 10
    davidct

    Could this be a no christians in foxholes situation?

  11. 11
    emanuelklein

    If mittens were sufficiently concerned
    about not adding to the National Debt, he would use his business
    acumen to provide Mormon Sacred UNDERWEAR for all GOP
    Presidential wanna bees & save on other wise adding to it via the cost of providing Secret service protection.

  12. 12
    jasonlane

    Reminds me of the Pope-mobile and its 3 inch thick bullet proof glass.

  13. 13
    bahrfeldt

    Can’t? or Won’t!

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