Albondigas Soup

INGREDIENTS
1 1/4 pound ground beef
one large white onion, diced
five cloves garlic, minced
two quarts beef broth
one large can diced san marzano tomatoes
olive oil
two bay leaves
half cup hot salsa
half cup chopped cilantro
six tablespoons corn meal
one large egg
quarter cup whole milk
half cup basmati rice
half teaspoon salt
half teaspoon black pepper
half teaspoon ground cumin
half teaspoon ground coriander

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Sautee most of the onions, half of the garlic, and the bay leaves in olive oil until nice and translucent.

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Mix the meat, egg, milk, salt, pepper, cumin, coriander, half the cilantro, the rest of the onions, and corn meal well.

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Form into balls.

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Add the broth, tomatoes, rest of the cilantro, and salsa to the pot, bring to a boil, and simmer for 15 minutes, salting to taste.

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Add the meatballs and rice to the pot, and simmer for twenty minutes.

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YUMMY!

Japanese Translation Needed (UPDATED)

This is a picture of a packet of ground pepper that I am trying to find available for purchase on the Internet. Can someone tell me exactly what it says on the package?

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UPDATE: Turns out this is a proprietary spice mix called Kuro Shichimi, and is made only by a centuries-old spice shop in Kyoto:

http://ajw.asahi.com/article/cool_japan/style/AJ201311300030

Now trying to figure out how to fucken buy some on the Internet. There is a Japanese store here that has it, but it doesn’t look like they will ship internationally:

http://www.kyoto-wel.com/

Ponderable

What is the thought process going on in people’s minds who put their feet up on the train seat across from them, and grind the filth from the bottom of their shoes into it? Are they happy to sit on the shoe-bottom filth of other people?

Republican Filth Getting What They Want: Delusional Half-Wit Jeezus Freak State Supreme Court Chief Justices Openly Defying The Supremacy Of The United States Constitution

Yes, of course it’s Alabama!!!

“Effective immediately, no probate judge of the State of Alabama nor any agent or employee of any Alabama probate judge shall issue or recognize a marriage license that is inconsistent” with the Alabama Constitution or state law, the chief justice wrote in his order late Sunday.

Of course, when these retrograde right-wing degenerates rant and rave about TEH CONSTITOOSHUN!!!!!, what they are talking about is the unamended version that established ownership of other human beings as an inalienable property right.

Flanke Steak Tacos

INGREDIENTS
flank steak
Whole Foods Peruvian BBQ spice blend
olive oil
guacamole
salsa
red cabbage
limes
bleu cheese
hand made corn tortillas

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Steak and spice blend.

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Generously rub with the spice blend and also rub on some olive oil.

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Allow to marinate in the fridge for at least a few hours.

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Grill the steak.

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Rest for five minutes wrapped in foil.

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Looks good!

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Condiments. Warm the tortillas, obvs.

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Grilled Flanke Steake With Rice Pilaf

INGREDIENTS
one flank steak
Whole Foods carne asada spice blend
one cup basmati rice
two tablespoons broken linguini
half cup diced white onion
olive oil
salt
pepper
saffron
grated fennel seeds
two cups chicken stock, salted to taste

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Look at this fucken flanke steak!!!!

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Rub the carne asada spice blend all over it.

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Seal it in a vacuum bag to marinate in the fridge for at least a few hours. I was originally planning to sous vide this motherfucker, expecting it take about an hour or two. But everything I read said that for flank steak or skirt steak, you need to sous vide it at the rare-medium rare temperature for 24-48 hours (I guess to tenderize the meat??). Well, we needed to eat the shittio that evening, so I just marinated it and then grilled it (see below).

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Sautee the onion in olive oil.

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Throw in the linguini and continue to sautee until the onion is toasting and the linguini is starting to brown.

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Add the rice and saffron, and continue to sautee until the rice is starting to toast and smells really good.

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Add the chicken stock, and some ground pepper and ground fennel, stir well, cover, and put in the pre-heated 350 degree oven for 35 minutes.

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Grill one side of the steak for a few minutes and flip it over.

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DONE!!! Remove the steak from the grill, wrap it in foil, and let it rest for about five minutes.

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Let the pilaf rest with the cover on for about five minutes, and then open it, and fluff with a fork.

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Remove the steak from the foil.

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Cooked perfectly!!!

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Time to eat!!!

Super Bowl Halftime Show

I had never heard Katie Perry sing before, but goddamn is she fucken horrible!!!!! When Missy Elliot came on, I thought we were saved, but NO!!! That fucken Katie Perry came back!!!!

You know who should have been the Half Time show???? SALT ‘N PEPA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Super Bowl Chili 2015

INGREDIENTS
25 dried Hatch chiles, stems and seeds removed
one large white onion
twelve large garlic cloves
one tbsp each, coriander, cumin, oregano, paprika, black pepper
three pounds ground meat
2/3 cup rye
20oz bottle of porter
two large cans crushed san marzanos
three bay leaves
one can Goya Roma beans
one can Goya black beans
olive oil
salt

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Dried Hatch chiles.

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Boil some water, throw them in, turn it off, and cover, steeping for about a half hour, stirring a few times and making sure they all get down into the water.

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Onions and garlic.

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Herbs and shpisches!

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Ground beef.

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Sautee the onions and garlic with the herbs and shpisches, but not bay leaves, until caramelizing.

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Add the meat and turn the heat up. Brown it while breaking it up.

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Reconstituted chiles.

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Meat is nicely browned.

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Rye and porter. (Have a few sippes! I did!)

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Deglaze with the rye.

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Add the porter and reduce until the alcohol is gone.

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Put the chiles and chili liquor in the blender and blend the everloving fucke out of itte.

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Add the chile puree.

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Add the tomatoes and bay leaves, and four tablespoons of salt, and simmer on low for a long time, stirring every half hour to prevent burning on the bottom.

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Simmering!!!

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Drain the beans and add them after the meat is pretty tender, about three or four hours. Simmer for another hour. Additional salt to taste.

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DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Republican Filth Getting What They Want: Toddlers Grabbing Guns Out Of Their Mothers’ Purses And Shooting Their Felon Fathers In The Asse And Their Pregnant Mothers In The Shoulder While Pit Bulls Observe The Carnage

Responsible gun owners:

The woman told police she purchased the gun the day before the incident, Drobik said. The man is not legally allowed to have a firearm because he has previously been convicted of a felony crime.

The family, including a two-year-old girl and the children’s grandmother, had been living in an America’s Best Value Inn for about a week with their two pit bulls when the incident occurred.