(1) What the fucken fucke is this stupid piece of tissue paper protecting your asse from? All the goddamn pathogenic bacteria are on the fucken door handle.
(2) Who fucken gives a goddamn flying fucke that “The Management” provided this farcical nonsense?
(3) The only legitimate use for these fucken pieces of tissue paper are to dry your goddamn hands in a hell spawn bathroom where “The Management” hasn’t provided any motherfucken paper towels.
(4) The manufacturers of these fucken wispy pieces of shitte purposely make them all thin and feeble so that if you try to dry your hands with a stack of them, they disintegrate and leave little specks of paper all over your hands.