Quantcast

«

»

Sep 09 2013

You Can’t Make This Shitte Uppe

A drunk motherfucker crashed his motorized wheelchair into an irrigation ditch and was drowning face down in six inches of water when an adult softball douche hunting for a home-run ball stumbled onto the drunk motherfucker and pulled him out of the water, saving his motherfucken life. And the fucken cops cited the drunke motherfucker for public intoxication.

6 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. 1
    Kate from Iowa

    If they’d caught up to the guy in the chair while it was still mobile, they could have cited him for DUI. At least here in Iowa. I’m pretty sure it’s the law in a few other states as well.

  2. 2
    Acolyte of Sagan

    Considering the fact that irrigation ditches are generally used to irrigate food crops, and given that motorised wheelchairs are powered by batteries that can leak some nasty shite when dunked into water, I’d have charged the drunk with either endangering public health by polluting the water-course too.

  3. 3
    Acolyte of Sagan

    Sorry…’either endagering…or polluting..’

    Shite!

  4. 4
    wtfwhateverd00d

    Why is the adult softball douche a douche?

    It seems probable he is far less likely to be a douche than youe.

  5. 5
    Grumble

    Because if you qualify to be noticed by CPD*, you are a douche.

    *Comrade PhysioDouche

  6. 6
    sailor1031

    Because only a douche would play “adult” softball?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>