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May 13 2013

I’ll Bet A Million Dollars He’s Not A Terrorist

Federal agents arrested a suspicious traveler with an altered Saudi Arabian passport at Detroit Metro Airport over the weekend after discovering a pressure cooker in his luggage.

According to a criminal complaint filed today in U.S. District Court, the passenger, Hussain Al Khawahir initially told customs officers that he brought the pressure cooker for a nephew at the University of Toledo because pressure cookers are not sold in Saudi Arabia, the complaint said. The man then changed his story and admitted his nephew had purchased a pressure cooker in America before, but it “was cheap” and broke after the first use.

If this fucken dumshitte were really a terrorist planning to explode a pressure cooker bomb, he wouldn’t have flown into the motherfucken US with a goddamn motherfucken pressure cooker in his fucken luggage. He would have bought a motherfucken pressure cooker after he arrived at any of kajillions of houseware stores in every fucken city. Or if he is a terrorist, he’s the stupidest one to have every existed since forever.

9 comments

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  1. 1
    tiberiusbeauregard

    Well, some religions make people dress themselves in potatoe sacks, so… common sense somehow seems to get lost along the way…

  2. 2
    Grumble

    I once brought a pressure cooker to the USA from a certain third world country where I was visiting, and where pressure cookers happen to be cheap. I wonder what would happen if I did that now…

  3. 3
    Trebuchet

    I once brought a pressure cooker to the USA from a certain third world country where I was visiting, and where pressure cookers happen to be cheap. I wonder what would happen if I did that now…

    Probably nothing, as long as you’re white.

  4. 4
    Kevin

    One thing is for certain — this guy is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

  5. 5
    eeke

    So, was the guy arrested for having a damaged passport, or for traveling with a pressure cooker while being arabic?
    Did you hear about this story, about a high school student who was expelled for doing a science experiment that failed. Or was she expelled for doing science while being black?:

    http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/05/02/florida-student-arrested-science-experiment-blast/2130381/

  6. 6
    Grumble

    “traveling with a pressure cooker while arabic” – TWAPCWA is the new DWB.

    (By the way, are Arabs white?)

  7. 7
    badgersdaughter

    My suspicious brain cells suggest that officials were not concerned about him bringing a pressure cooker into the US, but into the airport. Even if there was no danger that time, a paranoid security officer might see it as a practice run. Paranoid is a good word for it. I don’t see why anyone would feel like it was a good idea to lug an awkward thing like that on a plane flight, but whatever. It shouldn’t be a reason to be hassled.

  8. 8
    Grumble

    I just TOLD you why anyone would bring an awkward thing like a pressure cooker on a flight. They are CHEAPER in certain third world countries, where they are very popular and well-made. I myself, like probably thousands or millions of others, have lugged a pressure cooker onto a plane. And none of us blew anything up.

  9. 9
    eeke

    And this guy was ratted out by his neighbors for carrying a pressure cooker while arabic (he was NOT in an airport):

    http://stream.aljazeera.com/story/201305132224-0022752

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