Apr 26 2013

Other Awesome Android Shitte

iPad notifications give you two choices:

(1) the new mail or calendar event or whatever opens a dialog box in your fucken face thatte interrupts your shitte until you close it;

(2) the new mail or calendar event or whatever opens a little dealio at the top of the screen that then disappears in a few seconds, so if you don’t notice itte, tough shitte.

And there is no persistent notification icon in the status bar of new mail or calendar events or whatever, because Apple locks thatte shitte down and forbids apps from putting notification icons there because fucke you, thatte’s why.

Android lets apps put notification icons in the status bar, and you can tap on the notification area to slide up a window that tells you what’s going on. So you never miss shitte, but also never have to be interrupted. Admittedly, one thing iPad has going for itte is little number badges on home screen icons indicating the number of new items. While Android seems to allow apps to do this using icon-size widgets, few take advantage (including Gmail, which is stupid).


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  1. 1
    Marcus Ranum

    You like persistence. Some of us don’t. I like the way the Ipad does it with numbers by the icons.

    There is no right way! There’s room for both kinds of music: country and western.

  2. 2

    Re Marcus Ranum @ #1

    Country and Western is for red neck scum. I prefer Beethoven myself.

  3. 3

    Beethoven is for pseudo-intellectual, classist, elitist, neo-fascist scum.

  4. 4

    Beethoven’s music is almost unfathomly complex and beautiful. It is mystical and mysterious, and it is impossible ever to get tired of it.

    Country and Western is the same song over and over again, about a depressed man whose girl left and then his dog died.

  5. 5

    Just like my Android phone!

  6. 6
    Comradde PhysioProffe

    The android way is a kajillion times better than iShitte: you only see badges when you’re on the home screen, while the status bar is always there.

  7. 7

    Depending on the version of Android you are running, and the phone maker, you may or may not get numbered notification icons, like a 3 over your messaging icon showing you have 3 new texts. There use to be an app on the PlayStore that enables homesreen notifications. It has been a while since I have used them, though, so I am not sure if they even exist any longer.

    One thing you may want to do before you get too far along with your Android is opt out of airpush notifications, and other notification area spam.


    Use the manual opt out, the app just takes you to the website where you enter the information.

    Enjoy your Android.

  8. 8

    Country and Western is not music.

    It is noxious noise, created by Satan himself.


  9. 9
    Lithified Detritus

    Country and Western is the same song over and over again, about a depressed man whose girl left and then his dog died.

    Steve Goodman nailed it:


  10. 10
    Lithified Detritus

    Sorry – Preview is really messed up here. Here is the right link (I hope)

  11. 11

    because fucke you, thatteā€™s why.

    This phrase seems to be one of the foundational principles of iOS development philosophy.

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