Mar 11 2009

Holy Fucknoly!!!!11!!!

In another stunning upset, the motherfucking Dutch have clinched advancing to the next round of the World Baseball Classic–and knocked the Dominicans out–by beating the motherfucking Dominicans again!11!!!!!!

To give a sense for how huge this upset was, the Dominican pitching staff has had over five hundred wins in the Major Leagues, while the Dutch staff has had 95, 90 of which were by one pitcher: Sidney Ponson. The Dominican team has 23 current MLB players, while the Dutch have 2. The Dominican team has 1801 MLB homers, and the Dutch have 82. The Dominican team represents over $80 million in 2008 MLB salary, and the Dutch team $400,000.

This could be one of the greatest sports upsets of all motherfucking time!!!11!!


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  1. 1
    Comrade PhysioProf

    Nobody gives a flying fuck? You’d all rather I rant and rave about Maureen Fucking Dowd!?

  2. 2

    We’re all just stunned. Stunned I tell you.

  3. 3

    no, nobody gives a hoot about baseball. can’t you bake a pi or something?

  4. 4
    international grad student


  5. 5

    This is just proof that major leaguers are vastly overrated.

    Or that they may not give a shit about a contrived world competition in a sport filled with whiny-ass titty-babies who largely perform their best, coincidentally I’m sure, only during seasons when their contracts are running out.

    Still, this is more of a real “world” series than the annual fall flaccid, so I shouldn’t knock it too badly.

    So, in summary, you were correct to begin with—no one gives a fuck.

  6. 6

    I give a fuck. I love it!

  7. 7
    Isis the Scientist

    Yeah, I prefer talk of Maureen Fucking Dowd.

  8. 8

    The dutch have a baseball team? I thought it was all windmills, tulips and weed over there. Huh… Learn something new everyday.

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