I got the idea from DoucheMonkey and think this is kind of a cool meme, so here we go with the first sentence of the first post of each of the months of 2008. (Comrade PhysioProf has exercised a mild editorial license in interpreting the terms “first sentence” and “first post”.)
January: This is my shiny new blog; still smells like that new car smell.
February: Jon Swift has the full story, but the bottom line is that this is the first anniversary of Blogroll Amnesty Day, a day that now is commemorated by smaller blogs who link to blogs even smaller than them.
March: I am so fucking pissed off right now, my eyes are crossing.
April: PhysioProf has been giving a lot of thought lately to the issue of foul language and civility.
May: The Reverend Wright foofaraw is just an inevitable consequence of the fact that in the United States we incorporate into our political discourse–indeed elevate to the highest level of importance–the delusional views of wackaloon religious assholes and the relationships of political candidates to those assholes.
June: I have noticed a few very confused ideas floating around blogtopia (anybody have any fucking clue who coined that word?) concerning the intrinsic nature of the depraved sick-fuck right-wing faction that has controlled the Republican Party for the last 40 years.
You know, it would really be great if a true liberal presidential candidate were available, one that would say, “Fuck You!” to the press, to the republicans, to the believers in some daddy sky fairy that will save them all by destroying the world.
August: When are you motherfucking dipwads gonna wake the fuck up and realize that there is no “reaching across the aisle” or “building bridges” with people who hate you, your values, your families, and everything you care about in life, and would like to see all of that destroyed?
September: Republican electoral success rests on a three-legged stool of depraved sick-fuck extreme far-right-wing factions.
October: The Democratic Party is the sober responsible spouse who continually cleans up after the out-of-control drunken asshole Republican Party spouse who crashes the car, fucks the babysitter, blows out all the credit cards, and then cries: “It wasn’t my fault; you should have stopped me!”
November: It is a very good thing that the Republican Party has been soundly defeated in the Presidential election yesterday.
December: “Hard-Working American” is right-wing scumspeak for “not a nigger or a spic”.