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Aug 30 2008

It’s On!!!11!1ELEVENTY!11!

Peeved by PhysioProf’s pretensions to domestic godhood, domestic goddess and shrill harpy Isis the Scientist has goaded PhysioProf into throwing down the gauntlet. And now she has foolishly accepted PhysioProf’s challenge to a RECIPE WAR! The Terms of Recipe War are inside the crack.

(1) There shall be nine (9) battles in the Recipe War, each comprising one course in a complete menu, as follows:

amuse bouche
soup
salad
fish course I
fish course II
meat/fowl course I
meat/fowl course II
non-chocolate dessert
chocolate dessert

(2) These battles shall occur in sequence on each of nine (9) weeks.

(3) PhysioProf and Isis the Scientist shall engage each battle by posting their recipes on their respective blogs on the Monday of each week of battle.

(4) PhysioProf and Isis the Scientist are on their respective honors not to merely whole-cloth copy published recipes. However, handed-down family recipes or substantially modified published recipes are fair game.

(5) Esteemed readers of PhysioProf and Isis the Scientist shall decide each battle by voting on a to-be-determined third-party free Internet poll site. (I have no fucking clue how the fuck to do this, so if anyone has any ideas, for fuck’s sake please let me know.) The voting for each weekly battle shall end at midnight on Sunday.

(6) The standard for voting to be applied by our readers is in their discretion. However, it is to be hoped that–rather than making this a high-school popularity contest (the winner of which would clearly be PhysioProf)–our readers will attempt to assess the culinary promise of the recipes.

(7) The winner of the Recipe War is the blogger who has won the majority of battles.

(8) The prize for winning the Recipe War shall be the perpetual right to refer to oneself as Baddest Ass Domestic Motherfucking God/Goddess Of The Science Blogosphere Eleventy!!!11!!.

11 comments

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  1. 1
    Candid Engineer

    Holy Jesus. This is serious. It’s too bad that we can’t do some kind of badass Iron Chef sequence with the two of you presenting your dishes to a panel of bloggers. That would be so awesome.

    I haven’t found any polling sites with free hosting capabilities in the past. If you are desperate, I would be willing to offer my humble blog as a neutral host for your weekly poll.

  2. 2
    juniorprof

    Awesome, I wouldn’t mind volunteering to be a neutral polling place. However, I may rig it because I think Isis is fucking rad, you, not so much.

    Which reminds me, would you mind reading over my 25 page, single spaced, margin maxed, small font R01?

  3. 3
    Isis

    You know, PP, it seems as though have at least 2 fans. Perhaps we have 9? And perhaps each blogger would like to host the poll each week?

    Personally, I don’t trust you to run a “neutral polling place.” You smell like a cheater. I, however, smell like rainbows, sunshine, and dessert.

  4. 4
    scientistmother

    I too can offer a neutal polling place. so looking foward to trying each recipe, 2 dinners / week taken care of for 9 weeks. Yippee!

  5. 5
    Dr. Jekyll & Mrs. Hyde

    Count me out. Never a borrower nor a polling-place be, my mom always said. I think.

    However I will gleefully test your recipes and post my totally unbiased evaluations. (Confidential to Isis–don’t anger me with peppered pesto and you’re a lock.)

    Evaluation 1: With the oceans emptying and the cows a-farting, you don’t even have a vegetable course? Points awarded: negative one jillion each. Good luck clawing out of that hole, contestants.

  6. 6
    MissPrism

    I particularly like the idea of having separate chocolate and non-chocolate dessert courses.

  7. 7
    Professor in Training

    A guy who admits to liking Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets is challenging Dr Isis to a recipe war??

    HAHAHAHAHAHA this should be interesting. What are you going to put up for each course? Fish sticks, burgers and twinkies?

    **stops giggling to wipe tears from eyes**

  8. 8
    Nan

    I applaud the two desserts, although, like others, I find myself wondering just what PhysioProf will propose: non-chocolate = Butterscotch Krimpets; chocolate = Moon Pies?

  9. 9
    MissPrism

    I made a fucking blueberry and lemon meringue pie today that could take on the both of yous. (I’m crap at non-dessert cooking though.)

  10. 10
    neurolover

    hey, unless PP is a girl, I’m just not going to believe that any of his recipes are better than Isis’s. But, then, of course, that might be ’cause I don’t cook.

    (but, can we please have pictures? That would provide proof that you have actually cooked what you say, and then, I could at least salivate over the pictures, while understanding that I’m never going to get to eat anything?)

  11. 11
    neurolover

    PS: My daughter says it might make her papa feel bad if I tell him that boys can’t wash dishes, though, so I take back my comment about PP not being able to cook like a girl (I don’t want to make him feel bad).

    PPS: My husband of course, dreams that I’d tell him boys can’t wash dishes, but this is the example that daughter came up with when we talked about gender bias.

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