Hypocrisy to the fourth power


Jud McMillin has resigned from his position as a Republican representative in the Indiana legislature. I know this bothers you — another promising political career cut short — but the hypocrisy of this one is positively enthralling. Rarely does a politician engage in such furious foot-shooting.

  • He’s resigning because he sent explicit sex videos recorded on his cell phone to a large number of people. Oh, excuse me, his cell phone was stolen and “his cellphone sent a sexually explicit video to an unknown number of recipients”. This is what the passive voice was intended for by the good Lord Above, people!

  • This is the second time he’s resigned because of the escape of sexually explicit images of himself from his phone (AI researchers: look into this. It may be a sentient device). He previously resigned from his job as an attorney because he’d been taking advantage of a client who was a victim of domestic violence. How did he get elected to high office after that? I don’t know. Indiana?

  • A highlight of his legislative record was working to pass a “2015 “religious freedom” law allowing businesses to ban gay customers”. Because, of course, he’s very concerned about public and private morality, since God frowns upon men who touch penises, except of course, when that man is making a masturbation video to send to his mistress. Oh, wait, I just got kneemail from Jesus, and he says Dad disapproves of that, too.

  • I think this one should count as irony, rather than hypocrisy: he also helped stall a bill to outlaw revenge porn, so any Hoosiers who have copies of his porn video, there’s nothing but your conscience to prevent you from disseminating it wildly. And if you’re the kind of person McMillin counts as a friend, there’s a good chance you don’t have one of those!

But don’t you worry about Jud, he has announced that he is resigning to spend more time with his family. You all know about Republican families, right? The family is a versatile institution that both provides an excuse to sanctimoniously moralize at the public, and acts as a perfect, untouchable refuge when you’re caught violating your own moral code.

Comments

  1. treefrogdundee says

    Ah, fundie logic. Where spousal rape, incest, mistresses, statutory rape, child abuse, spousal abuse, and taking advantage of those you hold power over are all expressions of godliness but two men kissing is the worst thing since the Bubonic Plague.

  2. blf says

    Thugs are quadrupeds?
    Or does this one have a considerable self-hatred of one of his foots(? hooves? slime-emitting ducts?)?

  3. blf says

    …two men kissing is the worst thing since the Bubonic Plague.

    But it is! It’s unhygienic. Unless, of course, one of them is some of the merchandise in a boy brothel, or yer slave, or the altar boy, or… — then it’s all Ok…

  4. says

    Come on, we all know it’s the fault of liberals. Cell phones that can take and send videos were probably invented by a liberal. And if liberals hadn’t made porn more accessible he would never have thought to cheat on his wife and send some other woman a video of him getting frisky. No good Christian man ever cheated on his wife until Playboy first appeared. And Satan. Gotta work Satan in there someplace.

  5. jerthebarbarian says

    he has announced that he is resigning to spend more time with his family

    Jeebus – his poor family. What did they do to deserve that?

  6. Pierce R. Butler says

    Why on or above earth does anybody feel any need to make up any stories about Republican shenanigans?

  7. wzrd1 says

    “…untouchable refuge when you’re caught violating your own moral code.”

    What moral code? Teapublicans have never had a moral code at all. Well, none beyond “I’ll do whatever the hell I want to”, which I’ve heard said with my own half-deaf ears.
    So, yet another case of good riddance to bad rubbish. Hopefully, his wife will make him live in the doghouse in the yard.

  8. blf says

    What moral code?

    Teh thugs have quite a large one. The problem is they’ve lost the codebook, so no-one can decipher it.

    Quite a few don’t even recognise that it is encrypted. Hence the strange and nonsensical comments, they are reading the ciphertext…

  9. says

    He said, “Come on over here son, let me show you around
    Over there’s where we put the preachers, I never liked those clowns
    They’re always blaming me for everything wrong under the sun
    It ain’t that harder to do what’s right, it’s just maybe not as much fun
    Then they walk around thinking they’re better than me and you
    And then they get caught in a motel room
    Doing what they said not to do”

    – Ray Wylie Hubbard (“conversation with the devil”)

  10. says

    You could be right. The phone might be sentient. I test drove a car yesterday and one of the selling points was that if you have an accident it contacts a concierge service who send emergency services to your location. It also contacts the dealer to book an appointment when service falls due and does the same if its on board diagnostics detect a fault. It has various other features that you have to switch off if you don’t want it to act autonomously. I told my wife we won’t buy the car because with all that technology it is clearly “haunted”. I thought it would be a good plot for a movie but I think Stephen King has already done that.

  11. wzrd1 says

    As I’ve named every other POS car I’ve owned, Christine would be a welcome entry.
    My wife will tame her as she tamed me, I’ll also tame her as she tamed me.
    At the end, we’ll arrive with a partner.
    As we’ve managed over 34+ years.
    Or ejecta.

  12. wcorvi says

    For some odd reason the name Jimmy Swaggart comes to mind. “I have sinned”; “The Lord told me it’s flat none of your business.”

  13. Terska says

    I feel bad for his family. Maybe they can get a restraining order so he can’t force them to spend more time with him

  14. zenlike says

    As an assistant prosecutor he was prosecuting a guy for domestic violence, and in the course of this pursued a relationship with the victim. And he was still allowed to run for the GOP. Please GOPers, shut the fuck about morality and ethics, you have no fucking clue what that entails.

  15. sebloom says

    “How did he get elected to high office after that? I don’t know. Indiana?”

    Indiana here…

    It’s simple. Indiana is a red, VERY RED, state. When someone runs on the Rethuglican ticket we almost always vote for them (in the cities where “those” people live). It doesn’t matter who they are, what they’ve done, or how stupid they might be.

    Think: Dan Quayle.

  16. Rich Woods says

    @wzrd1 #8:

    Hopefully, his wife will make him live in the doghouse in the yard.

    No, she’ll make a statement alongside him in church next Sunday, proclaiming her faith in his honest repentance and please won’t you praise the Lord? Can I hear ‘Hallelujah’?

  17. mrcharlie says

    As a native born Hoosier (no longer a resident), this is just more proof to me of the accuracy of my description of it to friends these days: A great place to be from!