I hope you have a bucket handy »« Underestimation can lead to embarrassment

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  1. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Well then! Hiyo, the last time I was writing on TETs was in the era of… well, TET (before FTB?). I felt like this would be a comfortable place to discuss my recent feelings concerning a variant of “I’m not a racist, but/I’ve nothing against gays, but” and so on that could be called “I’m not pressuring you into sex, but…”

  2. Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @Lurkeressa:

    Do go on. Sounds interesting.

  3. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    See, I’m really into “friends with benefits” type relationships. Casual sex without strings attached, just… not with random strangers, but people who I’ve come to know a little bit. And “a little bit” is here defined as “not one or two nights of talking a lot, but an undefined time, after which I can be comfortable enough”. And there is someone who I got to know only a week ago, who I’m interested in, to whom I think I’ve explained this, who I otherwise like being with. Except he seems to have a problem with the “maybe at some point, but not yet” part.

  4. chigau (違う) says

    FtB started 1 August 2011.
    The Thunderdome and The Lounge started 6 August 2012.
    Welcome back, Lurkeressa.

  5. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    In the past, I’ve had sex with some people quite fast, before knowing them very well. It didn’t ever end badly at all, but I was still left with the feeling that in the future, I want to see and wait more.

    I also have a guy with whom I’ve been in this kind of a relationship for almost 3 years, and we’ve become really close (it’s nowadays like something between a FWB and a polyamorous relationship). I believe that if I wasn’t “seeing anyone” this way, I would’ve hopped into bed again faster now. But as it is now, I also want to talk with my partner about this (some time ago, when he started seeing another person, we agreed to tell each other about potential new partners before going to bed with them), which I haven’t yet had a good chance to do.

  6. says

    Lurkeressa
    My sympathies. FWIW, you’re not alone in that problem; it’s a pretty common effect of the virgin/whore complex that permeates our society, combining with the ‘men are/should be lust monsters who always want a go’ meme from the other direction. Unfortunately, I don’t know any good fix.

  7. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Ok, done with bills and accounting (starting this month in the black on all accounts, YEAH).

    Welcome back Lureressa

  8. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Dang, my apologies in my offering to Tpyos on your ‘nym in #10 Lurkeressa.

    *waddles off to check the Pullet Patrol’s™ preparations for tonight’s grand opening of the New And Improved FtB*

  9. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    So the new guy, I met him at a party, we got along, drank (quite little though) and went home. As it turned out, we live very close to each other (almost neighbours). In the beginning he was going to go home early like his friends, but after meeting me, wanted to stay and chat. When we were walking home, he asked “your place or mine”… I answered something like “I was thinking you go to your place and I go to mine”… tried to politely make it clear that I’m not into doing anything specific right then. He seemed to get it; we finished our walk and found out we live close by.

    Maybe I should point out that we don’t share a mother tongue – we’re both quite fluent in English but occasionally may have trouble with each other’s accents and such. So it’s possible that while I’ve been trying to explain things, it may not have got through the way I intended – and I’m not always that good at explaining things in my mother tongue either. Anyway, I figured “I don’t want to do that now” should be clear enough.

  10. ButchKitties says

    Just got confirmation that the tumor they found in Mr. Kitties’ colon is cancer. We won’t know the stage until after the surgery next week. He’s only 39, no family history of cancer.

    This whole month can bite me.

  11. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    So… a guy’s staying just to chat with me. Age old problem: “should I point out to him that if he’s just staying in the hopes to get laid, he shouldn’t bother?” That approach might have its benefits, but I don’t care to do that. If someone thinks they’ve wasted time being with me because I don’t put out after all, I’m not sorry they’re disappointed. Just like after a guy in a disco asks “do you have a boyfriend?” and I say truthfully “no”, I don’t follow it with “and that doesn’t mean you have your chance now”, but instead let him figure it out on his own. A principle thing. Also, I don’t want to imply to people I believe they’re just after my tail even if it were statistically possible.

  12. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Sorry this may take a while; as you can see, my style is quite rambling. I just want to always lay the groundwork well and sometimes people get frustrated when it seems I can’t get to the point.

  13. says

    The Banality of Evil now refers to Israel and its actions. During the night, Israel deliberately bombed a school containing thousands of children, the “warning shot to evacuate” unheard as the children slept. Then again, thousands couldn’t leave a single building in 30 seconds even if they heard it.

    How will the blindly loyal apologists and propagandists try to spin this one?

  14. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    and also CANCER, OH SHIT that kind of wait must be killing you. Here’s hoping the stage is early enough.

  15. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    I maybe should also point out that what I describe is happening in Finland (where the misogyny levels of say, America, seem really wild in comparison, even while we’re not without our own problems) and the person in question is an immigrant from Nigeria.

    He convinces me to come over and continue with the chatting, I figure that okay, I live nearby too, so it doesn’t make a big difference.

    Now, I can hear my cultural background whispering in my head “stupid naive irresponsible girl, staying alone with a man you hardly know in some party like I dunno, an independent adult or something, then letting him see where you live and then even following him into his place! And a black foreigner too! Are you really surprised/complaining, you should be happy and it’s a miracle you haven’t already been raped or worse! Also what were you wearing, that’s quite a lot of neckline etc”

  16. plainenglish says

    ButchKitties@13, just an infrequent contributor here but want to say how sad it is to have to face this kind of mortal pain. As PZ said recently, life is good (er sumthin’ like that) but the hard news just plain sucks. 39 is so young to face cancer like that… I wish you strength and sustaining life to deal with Mr. Kittie’s news. We all know about ring-ring of mortality but don’t wish to take the call…. This whole month did bite, indeed. How do we handle pain and loss without the God-buffer, the denial, the big rest and relief…. How to bear the pain…. Thank-you for sharing your pain. In my religious upbringing nobody could do what you did just now but always put it under verses and rituals. I don’t have any relief or respite for you but my knowing, with you. A hug from a nobody stranger (if it is wanted) and a tear too, remembering another loss closer here in my life….

    Lurkeressa, I think you are being acceptably rambling, smart and self-caring. The backbone of relationship, depth in sharing comes out of friendship. That takes time. Urgent sex can be good and it can be shallow. Friendship takes time; good coupling too…. best wishes.

  17. says

    ButchKitties, my deepest sympathies, and my hopes for an early and easy full recovery. Thumbs will be held.

    I’ll respond later this evening to the loveliness people made at the end of the last thread, but for now, I’m watching Fiddler on the Roof, because I’m a sucker for old musicals, and Topol was brilliant.

    “If I were a very very rich, eidl-diedl-deidl-deidl man…”

  18. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Aand we go on chatting, I tell him again I’m comfortable with the possibility of sex and all eventually but I’m *not* into doing anything right now. We take our clothes off, bit by bit, simply because it’s really hot there’s a heat wave going on (and while I’m not in for sex, nudity doesn’t bother me at all, what with the sauna culture I’m from). He begins trying to kiss me and touch me, I say I don’t really like it. We’re lying on his bed at some point… long story short for once, I made more than one attempt to leave if he can’t keep his hands off me otherwise, he told me not to go, please, he’s just really aroused but he’ll behave, anyway eventually we did just sleep. And left in the morning, he left to work I went home.

    In hindsight it feels obvious to me that I should just have been on my merry way long ago. I feel now that this is really making it sound like I’m leading him on all the time and being simple-minded for believing in any other outcome. But then again, I guess it’s the difficulty of saying “no” without a good reason that’s ingrained into most women. And the fact that I’m used to being with guys, even alone, normally without anything happening… and I was tired and probably not thinking straight and just wanting to lie down for a sleep.

  19. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    But wow, I’m actually in tears now (it’s never been hard to make me cry though, I’ve always hated that). Writing this makes me feel really dumb and ashamed about all that happened then, even though I felt I was being very sensible at the time.

  20. says

    I just noticed that PZ chose Gal Gadot’s Wonder Woman image for this Lounge. Cool. Even though I’m not a fan of the muted color scheme (just like Man of Steel), this WW looks fierce. I hope they don’t simply treat her as a warrior in the film. My favorite version of WW was by Rucka, where she’s serves as an ambassador for Themiscyra (and at one point, for a group of Greek Gods), charged with spreading the message of peace to Man’s world. She did this through diplomacy, discourse, reason, and logic. She had passion for all mankind, and would fight valiantly to save the life of one person as much as she would 4,000 people. Her message was a decidedly anti-authoritarian one. She promoted women’s empowerment in all aspects of their lives, and eliminating patriarchy. Especially war. She came from a culture of women warriors, so she is a fighter. She loves to scrap, and test her skills. But when it comes to fighting, it’s a last resort. She would prefer non-violent conflict resolution, and will try more than once to achieve that goal. However, she does have limits, and when tested, she’ll fight, fiercly, with every weapon in her arsenal (and she will continue trying to be diplomatic while kicking ass). She’s killed before, only when she feels there is no other recourse and she doesn’t take killing lightly. It’s a method of last resort. Treating Diana in that matter leads to a more multi-faceted Wonder Woman than one who is simply a warrior.

    Perhaps though, I should just be happy to see her on the big screen. Which I am.

  21. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Don’t worry Lurkeressa, to paraphrase Dr. Frasier Crane of Frasier, “we’re listening”.

  22. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Anyway. We’ve chatted on Facebook, met a couple of times, going for walks (again, I remind him I just want to get to know people better first, that is all, otherwise it’s hard to even get very aroused) and tonight having pizza and movies at his place (as agreed beforehand), then he began touching me (not agreed beforehand) and pestering me about sex/cuddling even though I said I still don’t want to do anything more than what I said I’d like to do. And he’s really frustrated, asking when exactly is it I’m going to have sex, don’t I trust him, I’ve had sex before so what’s wrong, what am I afraid of… “I’ts like you’re punishing me for something”

    Just… how do you explain to someone who doesn’t get it that “I DON’T FEEL LIKE IT” should alone be a valid reason?

  23. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Earlier on, I also asked if he’s been tested since, you know, I want to know the same about everyone. Especially as I’m having sex with more than one person. Although he might think I’m suspicious of him because of his background. Told me he’s clean (as a side note, in one FB chat he kept claiming semen is essentially blood so I did kind of question his biological knowledge) but didn’t make it clear until at one point he told, yes, and it’s a regular part of the process of entering the country. And that led to more of “I told you I’m tested and I’m fine, so what’s wrong”…

  24. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    And all the time during the first night, the way he repeatedly backed off after my “no”‘s and then soon began groping again I never felt threatened, but I did feel very uncomfortable. I’m used to guys backing off and dropping the issue after being told I’m not interested. What’s in play here, on the other hand, was the idea that persistence pays off. And when I keep refusing, it’s *me* who’s the stubborn one.
    “Do you feel like I’m not taking no for a no?”
    “Well… yeah”
    “I am, don’t worry” *soon begins groping again, just in case I’ve changed my mind or something*
    “Come onnn…” (later he told he doesn’t feel like he’s pushing or pressuring me…)

    Tonight, as it was seemingly becoming the same thing all over, I decided to leave earlier on.

  25. ButchKitties says

    Thanks everyone.

    While we were waiting for the biopsy results, we both kept saying: “Cancer or no cancer, just give us a damn answer.” Now I’m already nostalgic for when we didn’t know it for sure. But, we’ve got a game plan, things are moving quickly, and he’s otherwise healthy.

  26. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    ButchKitties

    I’m so sorry to hear that. Here’s hoping it’s in an early stage. If I may offer you some probably needless advice: try to take care of yourself as much as you can. It’s so easy to neglect self-care when those we love are suffering. Strength to you and Mr Kitties.

    Lurkeressa

    Forgive me, but it seems like he has trouble understand the importance of personal boundaries. This, to me, would be a big red flag, a warning that shouldn’t be ignored. I would walk away. Mind you, I’m not you, and I don’t know him.

  27. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    So yeah, that’s pretty much it. I don’t think there’s anything special or new to the people here, just my first personal encounter of this phenomenon. Wanted to pour out my thoughts. And, yeah, ask what you think I should do.

  28. carlie says

    CaitieCat, could I brush your hair? I always find it quite soothing to have my hair brushed.

    ButchKitties, I don’t even know what to say, except that I wish I could hold you both tightly and keep all the thought monsters away.

    “If I were a very very rich, eidl-diedl-deidl-deidl man…”

    I nearly drove off the road laughing so hard the first time I heard that remixed in a pop song on the radio.

  29. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Waves at cicely, rq and Dalillama . I hope you’ve all been well.

  30. cicely says

    Welcome In-or-Back, Lurkeressa.
    :)
     
    I am a perhaps over-cautious and un-trusting person.
    However.
    It seems to me that a person who, when advised of your boundaries (even if of a temporary nature), promptly ignores them, and “pushes” you…is trouble. Now or later.

    I’m so sorry, ButchKitties.
    *hugs, or other acceptable-and-non-intrusive gestures of comfort and support*
    Fuck cancer.

    left0ver1under:

    How will the blindly loyal apologists and propagandists try to spin this one?

    Same ol’ same ol': “Israel has the right to protect itself!!!!”
    -

  31. says

    Brief digression to whine: We were turned down for not having 3 times the rent in monthly income. Assholes.
    Butchkitties
    Shit. All my best wishes to you, Mr Kitties et al. *hugs*
    Lurkeressa
    *hugs* if desired. You’re entirely in the right in the situation described, and he’s being an asshole. My personal advice would be to cut off contact with him, because as FossilFishy notes, it sounds like he has some serious problems with respecting boundaries, and also with the idea of consent. This bit :”(later he told he doesn’t feel like he’s pushing or pressuring me…)” is a big ol’ red flag especially. I cut him absolutely no slack for his bullshit excuses, and nor should you. I say this as a dude, a confirmed horndog, and someone who’s been in a fair number of situations such as you’ve described. Some of them turned into sex, some of them didn’t when the other party(ies) present indicated they weren’t into it at that time. So things stopped there and we went on with the watching of movies or whatever else was going on. That’s what people who aren’t assholes do.

    FossilFishy
    Someone stole my wheel and left me a bent one in its place. Who does that, seriously?

  32. cicely says

    *waving back*
    Hi, FossilFishy!
    Been better, been worse. Respiration continues.
    Yourself and OtherFishies?

    Lurkeressa, the more I think about the situation as it sounds to be shaping up, the more worrisome it seems to me.
    And I can’t help but think, “This is exactly the kind of scenario that leads the jury to agree that she lead him on, or it was consensual and this is “buyer’s remorse””.
    -

  33. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Another difficult thing is that I don’t know how much this is about his personality and how much about the culture he’s from, and how much can be done about it anyway. The fact that he lives close is forcing me to deal with it somehow, I can’t just hope for the thing to fade away. But I might still like to spend time with him, outside our homes now though. I wonder if there’s a way to make him understand how his behaviour made me lose most of my initial sexual interest. Doesn’t look promising.

  34. cicely says

    *hugs* for Dalillama.
    I’m sorry you didn’t get the place.
    I’ve heard of landlords requiring essentially three months’-worth of rent, up front…but this one is new to me.
    -

  35. says

    I just participated in my first Pew research phone survey. It took about 10 minutes and I was asked general questions about myself: sexuality, political affiliation, religious affiliation, morals, etc.
    I’m curious to see what the Pew research results will be.

  36. carlie says

    So, I am back at home. Spent the last two and a half weeks on our somewhat annual epic midwestern trip. I wanted to try to meet up with cicely, at least, but there wasn’t any way our schedule allowed for it at the right time. :( Saw my family for awhile, my in-laws for awhile, did the whole Branson thing, got angry at Silver Dollar City and sent them an email (they replied asking me to call them, which I shall do tomorrow), spent time at the lake, and generally had a good time. Some sadness that I couldn’t get together with any of my friends who I normally see as nobody’s schedules worked out with anyone, and it’s always sad to visit and be directly confronted with everything I miss not living closer to them, but it was a good trip. Now home, back to the grind (not that I wasn’t on work emails the whole time I was gone…)

  37. says

    I’ve heard of landlords requiring essentially three months’-worth of rent, up front…but this one is new to me.
    -

    It’s not uncommon ’round here. I’ve run afoul of the problem before. I think it’s principally this particular management company that does it.

  38. jste says

    Lurkeressa:

    So yeah, that’s pretty much it. I don’t think there’s anything special or new to the people here, just my first personal encounter of this phenomenon. Wanted to pour out my thoughts. And, yeah, ask what you think I should do.

    I wouldn’t dare presume to tell you what to do, since I’ve never had to deal with that experience, but I’d like to think I would be cutting off that relationship and looking for safer, more boundary-respecting options.

    ButchKitties: I’m so sorry for you! I’m glad you have a plan, but I wish you didn’t have to go through all that. :(

    I will just throw another fuck cancer! on the pile. My grandmother survived breast cancer, and my grandfather is currently dealing with lung cancer, so I know a little of the pain you and your family are going through :(

    In real life, there are all sorts of non-verbal things you can do to show that you’re listening, that you care, that you understand. Why is accurate communication online, or hell, even in a phone call, so much HARDER!?

  39. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Tony!, I’d love to see all those aspects about WW. It’s too rare that conflicts get resolved by any other means than violence in the media. Two of my favourite albums from my favourite Finnish comic artist has the plot leading into what looks like an epic final fight and turns out to be an epic peaceful negotiation. I loved it. But we’ve been conditioned(?) to find such a thing boring and anticlimactic, even unrealistic.

    ButchKitties, it sounds like something I’d imagine you would discover quite early. Do you have knowledge of any likelihoods? (if that’s something that would ease your mind, maybe it isn’t)

  40. says

    jste:

    In real life, there are all sorts of non-verbal things you can do to show that you’re listening, that you care, that you understand. Why is accurate communication online, or hell, even in a phone call, so much HARDER!?

    I think that body language can make a big difference. That’s absent in online or phone communication, and some people haven’t compensated.

  41. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    The Redhead’s parents have been visiting, and it appears some of her dad’s work may be paying off (she doesn’t listen to me, but anybody but me, all ears). It seems once we got her left foot up on a footrest (all foot support, and not a leg rest, which has calf support), her lymphedema appears to be going down. Not necessarily surprising, since with her foot on the floor, the back of the thigh was being compressed. On the footrest, the compression isn’t there. An easy fix if that is the case.

  42. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Even a phone call is easier, since while the visual language is gone, there are still things like tone of voice, intonation… I guess it’s impossible to reproduce any of that online in writing, as there are no spontaneous cues that could be reproduced… future technology that registers things like how long you press on a button and how hard..?

  43. says

    Waiting for 2nd reel, so on my phone quick: Lurkeress, difficulty with consent almost never gets better over time within a relationship. I’m with the others: Big Red Flag, like, hanging on the wall of Tiananmen Big Red Flag. Disengage quickly and carefully. I wouldn’t also attempt to remain friends, because this kind of consent issue is the sort of thing that leads continued contact to be a maybe, and nothing really means no.

    That’s my experience, but by no means is it The Truth.

    Also Hi! I’m Cait, in Canada not far from Toronto. :)

  44. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    cicely

    I have all my limbs and I’m not on fire, day’s young though….

    Ms. Fishy and the Small Fry are reasonably well. We’re all getting over a nasty cold, but such is the price of loving a cuddly, petite disease vector.

    The SF had her 7th birthday a few days ago. So many little girls.

    So.

    Much.

    Hair.

    Seriously, I’ve been finding long strands of every shade in the most unlikely places.

    She decided to only have girls at her party. This bothered me a little, but at the event I changed my mind. Watching them run, and tussle on the trampoline, and throw marshmallows* as far as they could it seemed to me that they were being physical in a way that they don’t when there are a bunch of boys around. Could be bias on my part, but it did strike me quite strongly at the time.

    Dalillama

    That sucks. Fixing wheels is one of my favorite things to do, I wish I was closer.

    It’s a fairly common occurrence to find a junky bike left in place of your good one. Thieves steal the first bike that they can easily get, most often something cheap and nasty, and ride it around until they find something worth more. First I’ve heard of doing that with just a wheel though.

    Sorry to hear about not getting the place. That was pretty common practice back in Canada, at least in the city where I rented apartments. I always thought it was a tacit bit of class discrimination.

    *At me. At each other. Competitively for distance, it was fun. Their ammo was the props for the mallow-head race. You lick one side and stick it to your forehead, then race around the trampoline without letting it fall. Much giggling and excitement but it’s best to make sure those marshmallows don’t end up back in the eatin’ pile.

  45. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Now that I’m putting all of this in writing, it’s more obvious to me why what’s been going on has been troubling to me… In the situations, it hasn’t quite felt like that and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it (and yeah, whenever we’ve been outside his room it’s been nice enough). And If I’m completely honest, there’s probably some of the “positive discrimination” as pictured in Terry Pratchett’s Jingo going on. I haven’t wanted my – in practice – first POC friend to seem to be proving any points of the local racist asshats.

  46. cicely says

    carlie:
    So close! I could almost hit Branson from here with a missile, if I had a missile. And a suitable launcher. And training in how to use them.
    Ah, well; maybe another time.
    May I ask what Silver Dollar City did to annoy you?
    -

  47. plainenglish says

    One more post on this, Lurkeress…. I hear ambivalence in your actions with this guy, the wish for closeness being misinterpreted by him. Red flags for me too. It is wise to have a social life outside his place, for sure. But CaitieCat’s view, to disengage both quickly and carefully is wise… Does not mean you cannot still see him in public and avoid his pushing…. well, maybe… it will be clear very quickly how much he wants to build intimacy/friendship or if he just wants to jump.

  48. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    I think that it is possible to communicate effectively via the written word, or at least more effectively than most people are doing now. Remember that it was not so long ago that the only way to communicate over long distances was by writing a letter. Those correspondents were even more disadvantaged than we are because it could take weeks or even months for a misunderstanding to become know, let alone sorted.

    I think the key is to slow down and to use more words. Taking the time to re-read and to actively consider where misunderstanding might be had, followed by writing out more detailed explanations of meanings and intentions where necessary would help a lot. It seems to me that old-timey letters were flowery and verbose not just for styles sake, but to help mitigate the problems caused by the lack of visual cues.

  49. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    When someone equates “not trying to jump someone against their stated wish” with “pretending to not be interested” and says “I want your consent” but turns it into passive-aggressive martyred whining and even accusing – I don’t see the reason you won’t let meeee, you’re torturing meeeeee”… yeah, I don’t think I can see a way around this. It would be easiest if I could see he believed me when I say the sexual relationship option is out… and stopped connecting me by himself. That would show what he really was about… although I doubt that’s how it would go, given his track record for apparently taking no for a maybe and maybe for a promise.

  50. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Funny. When some people say “I want your consent” they mean “I want to make sure you’re okay with this”… Others mean it literally. “I want you to say yes and give me permission to do what I want”. Well, I managed to live a (hopefully) short story about how actions help define what’s meant by words.

  51. cicely says

    FossilFishy, I’m delighted to hear that none of your limbs are on fire.
    :) :) :)
     
    At 7, it’s quite possible that any boys she might have invited, might not have come, for it is a rare 7 year old boy who does not live in mortal terror of Teh Cooties.
     
    I remember when Son was about that age—he may have been 6; it’s been a long time, and I’ve slept since then—we threw his Very First Birthday Party Ever (at Pizza Inn, it was) and told him he could invite anyone he wanted to (rash, foolish, naive parents what we were!), and he invited his whole class.
    No girls came to the party.
    18 boys came. Some of them needed Ritalin really badly.*
    And The Husband and I did swear a Mighty Oath: “Never again!”—and collapsed into a frazzled heap.
     
    And so it came to pass that all future birthday pizza parties (because they were all pizza parties, since Son would happily eat pizza 3 meals a day, every day of the week, if only the opportunity presented; I think he’s down to no more than once a day, 3 or 4 times a week, max) were scored for no more than 8 friends.
     
    Thus endeth the lesson.
     
     
    *As it turned out, one of those boys, who we were later to find was known to the other, more seasoned parents as, “The child from hell”, was supposed to be on Ritalin—but didn’t take ‘em. ‘Cause that’s what cheek-pouches and ready access to plumbing are for. I think we have to assume that some very mellow fishies were the beneficiaries of The Marvels Of Modern Medicine.

  52. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Dalillama, I still don’t get why he (or she… or they…) left you a wheel at all. That’s so weird.

    Then again, I don’t get much of anything right now. What is going on here?

    Also, Lurkeressa, I am glad I do not have your problems (if problems they be). For that matter, I am glad I do not have Tony’s professed problems either (somewhere in the last thread… estimate it around post 500)… I am married and live in an open-in-principle-so-we-wouldn’t-have-to-hold-back-but-neither-of-us-is-the-type-to-flirt-with-other-people-very-much-so-there’s-likely-not-going-to-be-problems-anyway-relationship and damn I’m sorry but that’s what a bottle of Chianti does to you. Wish you all the best anyway. Seriously, be happy, and may whatever random factor is to it turn out in your favor!

    I’m sorry.

  53. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Oh and CaitieCat, following up on your post concerning your FOO… (I like the term “family of origin”, even though mine is… okay I guess) – I am sorry to hear that it didn’t turn out right with them (which certainly caused some anguish), but glad that you managed to replace them with other people “you chose to spend your life with”. I take it that family is just a default option, a sort of fateful offer… there’s no real harm to decline that offer, and fuck Exodus for saying there should be a death penalty for cursing your parents.

    Bible is such a drivel, I’m forcing myself to read it again in the last few weeks.

  54. ButchKitties says

    Lurkeressa, at this point all we know is that it’s adenocarcinoma. We won’t know the stage until he’s post-op. His liver looks clear based on the CT from the ER (liver is usually the first place colon cancer metastasizes to), but we don’t know how far it has penetrated the colon wall or if there are any cancer cells in his lymph nodes. He developed a fistula between his colon and bladder due to the blockage (which is how we found the cancer), which unfortunately would be another avenue for it to spread. They’re going to have to remove some of his bladder on top of the colon resection, and we’re doing chemo whether they find cancer in his lymph nodes or not.

    I’ve always been a member of the Fuck Cancer Club, but I think I might join its board this year.

  55. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Gorogh

    Dalillama, I still don’t get why he (or she… or they…) left you a wheel at all. That’s so weird.

    It’s most likely that the thief was on a bicycle, one with a damaged wheel. They replaced it with Dalillama’s and rode off.

    cicely

    Yeah, another kid in her class had a birthday party on the same day, he invited only boys so it all worked out well I guess. We only had seven guests, but they took up a surprising amount of space for all that none of them are much over a meter tall.

  56. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Sorry if this is a row post but I just feel I should write as long as I am inclined to/before my lethargy kicks in again… anyone of you played a BioWare game (such as Mass Effect or Dragon Age)? I recently realized that – notwithstanding the whole issue of heterosexual vs. homosexual romance options – you really don’t have much choice as to the TYPE of relationship you want to have with romanceable characters. Mostly, it is just your run of the mill romantic thing, you know, getting to know each other and identifying week spots and comforting etc.

    This applies even to supposed badasses like Miranda or Jack (in Mass Effect). I was wondering why that is. Sure, that sort of relationship may be the mainstream reason (and I am not saying my real life relationship is any different, in the end), but it’s interesting how it rarely occurs to the designers that relationships may be based on all sorts of reasons other than romance, such as, you know, sex. Or dominance. Or something else entirely I can’t think of right now. In all the BioWare games I know (Baldur’s Gate, Dragon Age, Mass Effect, TOR), only three characters offered a relationship somewhat different than the usual romance stuff (Viconia, Morrigan, Zevran)…

    Disclaimer: I am not making a normative statement applying to real life here. I’m just saying that, e.g., playing an evil character is hard even in games supposed to support that playing style. Or that as long as it’s consensual, not every relationship has to be based on a deep understanding or some such thing… and that it’s curious how that isn’t reflected in those types of media. (btw I’ve never played Witcher… anyone know if that’s any different?)

  57. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    FossilFishy, Odysseus (or Terence Hill, alternatively) wants his nickname back! Also,

    It’s most likely that the thief was on a bicycle, one with a damaged wheel. They replaced it with Dalillama’s and rode off.

    That makes sense… except no it does not… Sure they can replace their own wheel, but why mount their broken wheel on Dalillama’s? It does not make sense.

    And yes Tony the Chianti was damn necessary. It’s a magnum, too, but the couple I spontaneously invited over for dinner didn’t want to come so I sort of have to get rid of it on my own…

  58. ButchKitties says

    Blagh, sorry for the wall-o-text. My job is a combination of customer service, billing, and tech support. Maintaining a pleasant, helpful attitude at work with this on my mind has been a wee bit stressful. It’s nice to be able to just say what’s going on.

    Thanks again for the well wishes and advice. You guys are the best Horde ever.

  59. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    ButchKitties, had to scroll up to see what you are referring to… I am so sorry to hear that. You have my sympathies… hope Mr. Kittie responds well to whatever treatment he gets…

  60. HolyPinkUnicorn says

    Sorry to hear that, ButchKitties!

    39 seems pretty young for colorectal cancer, and regular screenings for it aren’t even recommended until age 50, so at least it was found. Hope everything goes well.

  61. Jacob Schmidt says

    Lurkeressa

    And he’s really frustrated, asking when exactly is it I’m going to have sex, don’t I trust him, I’ve had sex before so what’s wrong, what am I afraid of… “I’ts like you’re punishing me for something”

    Regardless of anything else, this right here sets off a half dozen warning bells.

    1. The need for an exact date.*
    2. The implication that trust is owed to him.
    3. The idea that since you’ve had sex with others, you should be comfortable with him.
    4. The idea that not getting what he wants constitutes punishment.

    Usually “a half dozen warning bells” is hyperbole, but there’s 4 right there. I don’t place good odds on this guy being remotely respectful. I suggest disengaging and, if you’re comfortable, telling him exactly why you’re disengaging. Give him some time to mull it over and address some of his habits, and if you want, give him another shot. But as things stand, I would not be comfortable around someone like that.

    *Me and my partner did actually set a date; I didn’t particularly care, so it was just a matter of whenever she was comfortable. She decided she wanted to set a date a head of time.

    Apropos of nothing in particular, I’ve been occasionally mulling over the time one of my mother’s clients very aggressively asked that I date her. This included repeated requests, demanding that I give her an explanation, and following me into my room (where I’d gone to avoid her) to beg (literally; tears and everything) me to date her. The whole thing made me incredibly uncomfortable, not in the least because, she being one of my mother’s clients, it would have been extremely unethical for me to say yes in the first place.

    It didn’t occur to me that what happened was harassment. I mean, I knew it was literally harassment, but it never clicked in my head that it was sexual harassment. Though I guess it’s worth noting that I never felt unsafe, just perpetually on edge. I’d be in a conversation, and she’d stand behind the person to whom I was talking, silently pleading (again, literally). I couldn’t get away, not without making a fuss, and I’m, by nature it seems, very much against that.

    I’ve noted before that my mother is pretty awesome when it comes to this stuff (she complained to the school about a minor incident that happened to me in grade school, and fought with the police about my brother being molested by an older boy down the way), but she brought this woman back into our home after I’d explained to my mother what happened, and asked my mother not to bring her back. She did anyway, after promising not to, though in fairness to her she thought I wasn’t home, and thus not available to be harassed again.

    I have no real point; just sharing an anecdote.

  62. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Nah, I think you’re misremembering Gorogh.

    Fucking hell. Some asshole stole my front wheel. They left a different front wheel, one which doesn’t fit on my bike due to a bizarre disk-shaped protrusion. What joy.

    The thing didn’t fit until Dalillama got the disc brake rotor removed.

    Odysseus (or Terence Hill, alternatively) wants his nickname back!

    Er, okay? I is confused and Google was no help………

    My nym came from Coelecanth, which I used for many years. People had trouble spelling it, partly because I chose the less common spelling. I was dubbed FossilFishy by a frustrated cycling forum mod and it stuck.

  63. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Er, okay? I is confused…

    Don’t worry too much, there’s ethanol not only in my blood, but beyond my blood-brain-barrier… I was referring to the “Nobody”-part of your nym, which both Odysseus and Terence Hill used at some point of their career…

  64. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Gorogh: Oh, oh! Even when the relationships begin from different places, they all seem to flow towards the normative way. Or there’s a fixed viewpoint; with Jack, you can have romance+sex or just sex, but the sex is just once, and it’s a renegade option. After that, she wants nothing to do with you. I like that you can have it in different ways with her, but… I dunno. Mere sex is shown as this thing that cold, indifferent, even psychopathic people do.

    As for Garrus, he begins as a friend-with-benefits type of thing (and this is implied between him and Tali in 3 if you pick neither), but in 3 it develops into full-blown romance. This is similar to how all the romantic comedies and other works seem to picture this sure-why-not-let’s-do-this kind of relationship… if it works, it’s gonna develop into love&romance. Because, y’know, it’s not as happy and fulfilling otherwise.

    The fanbase has had a huge influence on these games as well, and it’s also interesting to think about what it would all be like if it was only the developers’ ideas… do some of the stiff tropes come from the audience, or would the plot/options be even less diverse?

    What I detest most about ME is the creators’ apparent unwillingness to portray alien females they could not make sexy. All non-asari female aliens are nonexistent/invisible, absent with or without stated reasons, or heavily clothed so we don’t see much of them. And every time “female” is brought up, it’s something to do with reproduction. Cuz, y’know, that’s why females exist, as opposed to the males, the standard people. Ffs, just give some turians female voices without changing their appearance. Really, you have so little imagination left after creating everything else?

  65. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    p.s.: For the record, I would have been fine with Coelecanth!
    p.p.s.: Looking it up, I see it would be spelled Coelacanth. And I would have thought it had to do with “heaven”, but apparently, it is a Greek derived-Latin name, so I would have had no clue. Anyway, that’s cool.

  66. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Incidentally, I just saw a quote the guy in question posted on his FB wall a while ago:

    “To have a true abundance mentality is to believe that you are entitled to all the great things that life has to offer in the form of whatever brings you joy, fulfillment and happiness.”

    Someone clearly has an abundance mentality, believing to be entitled to things, yeah.

  67. jste says

    Mostly, it is just your run of the mill romantic thing, you know, getting to know each other and identifying week spots and comforting etc.

    This applies even to supposed badasses like Miranda or Jack (in Mass Effect). I was wondering why that is.

    I would guess a combination of lazy writing, and not wanting to risk getting a higher age rating.

    (btw I’ve never played Witcher… anyone know if that’s any different?)

    Yes. You don’t really develop relationships, you just convince a woman to sleep with you, get their picture in your photo album, and then move on to the next woman. No joke, sex in the witcher is quite literally a “Gotta catch em all” type thing, and some of the encounters are downright unflattering. If you play it, perhaps consider ignoring (or trying to) that aspect of the game.

  68. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Asari are truly the worst fan-service ever. I despise the whole concept of that race and could never bring myself to have anything to do with Liara. Ever. It is so transparent.

    And yes it’s just strange with the sex… I mean, as I said, from a normative standpoint it should be consensual and everything. Still, there very rarely are any alternatives to your standard cuddly sex. But in real life, there are. Speaking of which, I can’t recall too many movies either where the option of, say, sadomasochism or something similar is represented as valid. Then again, I have to admit I am too little into this field to make any assertive statement about it… is it considered pathological in DSM? But if so, why, if it’s consensual? To maintain the moral fabric of society? The fuck does your (consensual) sexual gratification has to do with morals?

    As to the fanbase, are you sure that it really does have an influence (except indirectly through bad-publicity-influenced purchase decisions)? Because… well… I’ve never been active in any of the relevant forums, but my gut feeling is that even if I wanted to, I’d have limited influence on anything.

    Mh and excuse my incoherence, but it’s getting late… Garrus, I like him a lot as a character. I think I hit on him when I played my single female Shephard, too. I might have as male Shephard, too… ah I don’t get any more lucid today, I’m sorry.

  69. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Yes. You don’t really develop relationships, you just convince a woman to sleep with you, get their picture in your photo album, and then move on to the next woman. No joke, sex in the witcher is quite literally a “Gotta catch em all” type thing, and some of the encounters are downright unflattering. If you play it, perhaps consider ignoring (or trying to) that aspect of the game.

    Really? Now that is disgusting… thanks for the info jste, I just lost a little more respect for a friend of mine who is a total fan of the series…

  70. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    That being said, casual sex is in principle okay with me, as long as it’s not exploitative. That sort of sounds like it is. But really, I can’t be sure from what I heard… my comment might have just been a puritan reflex. Is it exploitative?

  71. jste says

    Gorogh,

    Really? Now that is disgusting… thanks for the info jste, I just lost a little more respect for a friend of mine who is a total fan of the series…

    That being said, casual sex is in principle okay with me, as long as it’s not exploitative. That sort of sounds like it is. But really, I can’t be sure from what I heard… my comment might have just been a puritan reflex. Is it exploitative?

    The vast majority of it is casual sex – Sex with someone you’ve *just* rescued from bandits who were probably going to kill her seems a bit on the exploitation side, but that’s the only really “off” encounter that I remember (it’s been a few years since I played, and my opinions have matured a far bit, so don’t take that as gospel). But there’s still that collecting the “Romance” (read: half naked women in various poses) cards thing which is tacky as hell, on top of being sexist. it’s still a fantastic game which I’d highly recommend if that aspect doesn’t put you off too much.

  72. Lurkeressa, Always Late to Juicy Threads says

    Gorogh: I do too believe we could talk a lot.

    Alas, right now I believe I ought to go to sleep, 7+ o’clock in the morning being a very fine time for that on a summer Friday, before I descend into unsalvageable incoherence.

    But still… as for the fanbase thing, well, it’s what I’ve gathered, but no I’m not sure, I wasn’t active there either. I think for example it was so that Garrus wouldn’t have been a romance option if he didn’t turn out to be a fan favourite (I too spent the first game wanting to be with Garrus instead of the actual options and was joyous that the 2nd game provided the option, I confess.)

    And the asari space strip clubs! I remember the first game and Ashley pointing out dryly how far women had come: we’re travelling space, and come to strip club. And I thought, whoa, Bioware, you’ve got your fanservice aliens wobbling their asses at the player everywhere we go, and you’re trying to moralize the player for looking at them and making the clubs into evil crime dens to show how BAD and CORRUPT it all is and SHAMEFUL IMMORAL PLACES shame on you! Bioware you’re trying to have your cake with you and eat it too that’s not how it works

    For all my criticism, I loved that series, although how much of that is due to Garrus I don’t know, because fuck yeah Garrus. And Mordin. Mordin all the way except for his “there must be more to life!” stance raised my eyebrows a bit. Every single school in the world should have a Mordin giving sex ed. And likewise every other game should have Mordin sex ed, it would make the worst stuff worth it. And Legion… okay there were several characters that just made me love everything.

    But but, I am so glad about this, this thread and the people and the discussion, it’s helped me crystallize my own thoughts, and thank yous flying to all the people and the support and I hope so much that everything turns out okay for you all, finding apartments and all, and fuck cancer. Seriously, fuck cancer.

    I’m taking my current experience as cutting teeth. I’ve been fortunate (sheltered?) enough to reach my current age without a situations like this, and I’ve been confused and not sure how to act, but glad it’s now and not before when I could have been less equipped to handle it.

  73. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Will try to respond tomorrow, but I enjoyed talking about the gaming thing, Lurkeressa and jste, and about all those other things too. Not sure if I’m the only one who’s drunk here *glances at Lurkeressa* BUT I have nothing constructive to contribute anymore, plus tomorrow is another day I have to get up to… whatever review some paper or something, we’ll see…

    Anyway, thanks and good night!

  74. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Well, this is….strange. Can’t say I like the pale type here in the comment box. Damn near impossible to read.

    First to WHINGE! WOOT!

  75. Ariaflame, BSc, BF, PhD says

    It does make the comments on the iPad very squished to the right. Maybe there is a mobile version somewhere. Pale gray a bit too pale.

    I have to concur lurkeressa that that sounds like someone who does not respect your boundaries. Someone I was friends with when I was younger kept pushing as well. I don’t have any contact with them any more.

  76. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    Well, let’s see. The background is much lighter in color and hurts my eyes in more situations without having to turn my laptop screen down so much that other pages aren’t readable, not to mention probably increasing screen energy usage slightly; the comments and articles are no longer centered; the font is slightly larger and less densely packed so that a given amount of text takes up twice as much screen as before; the composition box now contains “coal-dusted snow” gray font on a white background, and it’s a total crapshoot if this will come out readable due to that *squints harder*; but at least you can finally get back to the Pharyngula frontpage from an Older Posts page by clicking the banner again.

    Other than that, though, what’s to like?

  77. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    Also, I’ve just had the horrible realization that I’ve gotten so used to “Roy Rogers”es made with Pepsi that a “real” one tastes *wrong* to me. >.>

  78. jste says

    Huh. Comment box aside, I thought it was a vast improvement over that previous travesty of web design, even if it still has issues. I posted this over in the metamorphisis thread to, but this grey has GOT to go. And the buttons need a bit of padding. And PZ’s posts have lost their own special glow.

  79. chigau (違う) says

    I think we may need a whinging tech-thread on

    why this isn’t working for me

  80. rq says

    Well now. Another day, another FtB, and the pale grey is difficult even on a full screen. Trying to find the correct head angle now.

    Lurkeressa
    As many others have said, too many red flags on that one. Way too many. :/ I hope you manage to find a non-confrontational and non-stressful way out of the relationship, whether you leave yourself an out to give him another chance later on or not.

    ButchKitties
    I’m sosososo sorry. Cancer sucks. :( I hope the news you get is as good as it can get.

    Dalillama
    *hugs* And fuck them for wanting 3 months’ rent. :P

    FossilFishy
    All hail parents of 7-year-olds! Mine became one yesterday. No party yet, though, but it will be only boys
    (he’s already made a guest-list). Last year I worried about this, since he knows several girls with whom he is willing to hang out but he wouldn’t consider them for invitation. Last year I worried even more, though, because he was scared to go to a girl’s birthday party (but he went in the end and had a reasonably good time). This year I worry a bit, but at the same time, his friends are his friends, and I can’t make him invite people he doesn’t want, not for his birthday. (But I try to provide enough unbirthday opportunities to hang out with girls, and there’s never been a complaint.) So congrats on 7 years of parenting to you!

    +++

    Where can we complain about the new FtB?
    I’m already disappointed that I can’t see the number of comments on a thread before opening it. This is important to me sometimes, because I don’t subscribe to threads but I check older ones to see if new comments have been added. It also lets me know (for long comment threads) whether I have the time at that moment to start reading, because sometimes I don’t want to leave threads in mid-stream.
    Also, according to my computer, NONE of the comments are numbered. How are we supposed to have conversations like this???

  81. rq says

    Oh. Never mind that bit about number-of-comments, I was just at the wrong blog (whose comments, presumably, haven’t yet followed it to the new format). Please ignore!

    But still no comment numbers. :(

  82. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Shit, didn’t notice the lack of comment numbers. I hope that’s in the fix-it-soon queue.

    Trying some html to see how preview now handles it.

    Nice, the href tag no longer pooches the preview.

  83. rq says

    And what Azkyroth said about the background. Huge glare. Way too bright. :P Can it be toned down, please?

  84. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    rq

    This year I worry a bit, but at the same time, his friends are his friends, and I can’t make him invite people he doesn’t want, not for his birthday.

    Yup, that was exactly our thinking too.

    Cheers rq, seven years down, a lifetime to go….

    [raises glass, contemplates beginning his serious drinking problem right now so as to avoid dealing with a teenager, reconsiders, sips demurely]

  85. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    And here’s to the Night Watch!

    [Hangs shield over the Lounge door, buffs the new motto]

    “Primum Loqui, Primum Queror!”

  86. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    ……dafuq? There’s no longer an apparent link to the comment section or a listing of number of comments on the main pages.

    The SF had her 7th birthday a few days ago. So many little girls.

    So.

    Much.

    Hair.

    Seriously, I’ve been finding long strands of every shade in the most unlikely places.

    Knit a sweater? :)

    Lurkeressa: Yeah, I would say break ties. This guy sounds really unsafe and entitled to me.

  87. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Knit a sweater? :)

    That got a guffaw out of me.

    Knitting ain’t going to happen, but The Small Fry did get a felting tool for her birthday…..

  88. rq says

    *raises glass with FossilFishy for (a) the seven years, (b) the nightwatch and (c) Opera*
    Because things should come in threes?

    That new shield certainly goes well with the new, still-slightly-charred interior. Oooooh, so bright!

  89. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    [hands rq a pair of Corey Hart ™ approved shades.]*

    Cheers.

    *Oh all right, so I’m old, here, have some David Caruso sunnies. What…he’s passée too? Never mind then….and get offa my lawn!

    I’m off home while there’s a break in the rain. Good luck to all with the confusing and frighting changes that are afoot.

  90. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I haven’t updated Opera since 12-something. Did they ever add enough of the customization options and general features back into that heinous Chrome-clone they threw their entire development history and userbase to the four winds to build to make them worthwhile?

  91. Don Quijote says

    1st August and ferier day here in Pantón. Lots of pulpo (yuk) and lots of vino (yum).

    Also the start of the exodus of Spanish holiday makers from Madrid and Barcelona which means that the highways and byways will be full of wannabe Alonsos driving too fast and too close. Shudder to think what will happen.

  92. says

    Ha, it’s back!
    We had a very nice afternoon yesterday. Went to the Zoo with my BFF, her husband, her daughter, husband, little one and dog, and since I’m me and it makes little difference whether you make a fritata for 4, 5 or 10, I invited them all for dinner. The kids were totally sweet. The little guy is 18 months, so he’s completely charmed by the “big kids” who are in turn charmed by this very responsive “doll”.

    ButchKitties
    *hugs*
    Wishing you and Mr. Kitties all the best

    Lurkeressa
    Echoing the others: run, opposite direction.
    Yes, it’s totally possible that there are language problems, yes, it’s totally possible that his cultural background hasn’t taught him well about consent and respecting women’s boundaries, but that’s not your problem. You’re obviously uncomfortable with him and his advances, and you don’t owe him.

  93. rq says

    Safe trip, FossilFishy, don’t get too wet. I hear there’s sleet and hail in places. :/ (I’ll take those Corey Hart glasses, though, my favourite kind!)

    Giliell
    That’s like Youngest with any baby he meets, he pats them and sits beside them and speaks to them like they’re a new pet or something. (On the plus side, it means he doesn’t freak out if I’m holding someone else’s child, he thinks it funny.)

  94. says

    rq
    Hehe. Little one and the little guy have a kind of long-distance relationship (hey, 35 km are huge when you’re that young ;) )
    My BFF takes care of the little guy 4 days a week and they often look at the pics of my two that are hanging around. Actually, their names (well, 2 of three syllables) are among the few intelligible words he speaks! And the little one always talks about how he’s her friend and how she’s going to invite him for her birthday and how I need to make waffles for him :)

  95. says

    I hate the redesign. Comment column is too narrow, side navigation is too big, and the color scheme? Not exactly easy on the eyes. And the lack of comment numbers is… annoying, at best.

    The only thing I like is the increased readability of the font.

    I suppose, in the interest of fairness, I ought to give this layout a chance…

  96. says

    rq
    I think that people are really missunderstanding that poor girl. You can hear her cry “I don’t want to die when I’m a hundred “. So I don’t think that this is about her not wanting her brother to grow up so she can keep her “baby doll”, but about her realizing that people grow old and die and her not wanting that.
    The little one, who’s about the same age as that girl is going through that phase ATM, too. She frequently asks about where my grandpa is now, baltantly refusing to believe the “gone” and asking questions like “Can we dig up grandpa’s skeleton?”

  97. rq says

    Giliell
    Oh, I got that question once:
    “Where’s granny?”
    “She died, remember? We were all at the funeral.”
    “Oh, you mean when they put her into the ground?”
    “Yes.”
    “So she’ll turn into bones?”
    “She’s already all bones.”
    “Did the insects eat her?”
    “Yes.”
    “Can we look? I want to see what bones look like.”
    “…”

    And yes, I agree that it’s less about the doll-aspect and more about aging and dying. Because he’s so cute right now!

  98. katybe says

    Hmm, I logged in to comment and it dropped me back up at the original post, instead of the comment box. Am I imagining it, or is that new too?

    Anyway, the reason for my comment is I got a petition in my e-mail which I think a few people here might be interested in. It may be UK-only (not sure), and may have been shared elsewhere, but if anyone hasn’t seen it, please consider signing https://www.change.org/en-GB/petitions/jeremy-hunt-nhs-home-office-remove-all-copies-of-this-poster-and-stop-victim-blaming#share – it’s an NHS poster trying to discourage excessive drinking, but in a way which links it to rape.

  99. rq says

    There’s no list of recent posts from Around FtB. :( I count on that little box to know what’s new. Laziness? Perhaps. But it saves me time and clicking.

  100. says

    rq
    And now look where that got you job-wise….

    But back to the little girl, it’s telling how the “cute” interpretation actually makes her a pretty selfish person, but the other one a rather empathic one…

    And since we’re talking kids…
    “Mum, you’re talking to yourself”
    “Is that bad?”
    “No, I just wanted to mention it in case you didn’t notice it yourself.”

  101. opposablethumbs says

    Butchkitties, fuck, I’m so sorry. I hope the surgery proves 100% successful, with no spread to anywhere else. Crossing all my fingers for you.

    Lurkeressa, it’s good to (re?)-meet you. Fwiw, I agree wholeheartedly with what others have said – there are red flags all over this; constantly badgering someone, wanting a guaranteed deadline and testing the boundaries again and again and again does not bode well.

    Hugs and greetings to the Horde.

  102. rq says

    Giliell
    Funny, usually it’s Eldest warning me that he’s about to talk to himself for a while, and that I shouldn’t worry…

  103. says

    Too bright! Too bright!

    I’m going to whine a bit… The comments are indeed squished to the right on my PC. I just checked Nixie, and they are readable on her (Nexus 7 tablet). Which is good, because I do a lot of my reading on the tablet now.

    I miss: Comment numbers
    A “Return to top of page” button (because scrolling back up to the top of a long page with my finger is a pain in… the finger.
    An easier-to-find list of recent posts for everybody, because sometimes I click on something from somebody I don’t normally follow, just because it looks interesting.

    Oops, must run, need to feed cats and check kitchen drains, which are Not Draining and have had some elderly Liquid Plumber applied.

  104. kage says

    I’ve been a lurker at FTB forever and just started commenting recently, but haven’t set foot in here before. So, hi everybody!
    I wonder if anyone uses an alternative to the phrase count your blessings‘. I think if you take out the idea our luck (or lack thereof) is related in any way to a deity it’s a good sentiment. I do think we make our own luck to some extent, but random bad stuff happens to people all the time and avoiding a lot of the bad stuff is often just pure luck. Sometimes I want a phrase that expresses an atheist version of count your blessings. Any ideas?

  105. says

    @kage:

    I don’t really think there is a need for an alternative phrase. It’s a phrase almost completely separated from any religious meaning. It’s like “bless you” after one sneezes. You’re not literally blessing a person, it’s just a polite phrase. (I use “gesundheit” cause I like that it’s related to good health rather than “oh my god you’re going to die”)

  106. Randide, "Fools admire everything in an author of reputation" says

    *Runs into The Lounge, arms flailing*
    *Doesn’t read anything*

    AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    IT’S ALL DIFFERENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    *Runs out of The Lounge, arms still flailing*

  107. says

    Randomly,

    Giliell, nice work! I don’t know about dying from lack of creativity, but I sure do get miserable when I’m short of it.

    Tony! If you’re seconding me, does that mean I get to be one of your Sheeple? Because that’d be way cool.

    I can’t embiggen the page here by tapping the tablet screen anymore; I have to actually use my fingers to pull it until it’s readable, and it won’t stay the same size. This is a real nuisance.

    I don’t like “count your blessings” or anything involving gratitude. My parents (and my ex bf) used those as weapons, “you ought to be grateful we put up with you”, and so on. So I avoid using them.

    *refills hugs basket* Time to move laundry and make a shopping list. Later, Horde!

  108. opposablethumbs says

    I prefer “salud” or “gesundheit”, but don’t always get them said quickly enough :-) (salud is automatic in Spanish but not in English, and gesundheit doesn’t come automatically at all. But I like them better, of course). As for the counting blessings idea, I suppose I would probably say something like “well it could be worse!” or – maybe closer in feeling – I might say something about looking on the bright side. “Got to look on the bright side” or “well I suppose we should look on the bright side” … or, yanno, something.

    Argh, I was so wrapped up in trying to help SonSpawn sort out his paperwork for starting uni in Sept. that I almost missed out on a job!?!?!?!? Luckily for me I’ve done pieces for them in the past, so they were so kind as to phone me when I didn’t respond to the email. Phew. Need that job. There’s 3 or 4 days work in that, dammit!

  109. says

    Crap, is there a recent posts button somewhere? Site is almost unnavigable on my phone. Three clicks and a drag just to be able to see that one blog has not updated? Then another click to go back and start slowly going through one by one?

    Garh. Expect to see me a lot less, that’s way too much time for way too little return.

    Much easier before: scroll down, open in new tab each blog i want to read, then work back thru recent posts, and skip ones where I don’t see new posts.

    Since I don’t choose posts by their alleged single-word topic, the default menu is utterly useless to me.

    The presentation stuff isn’t so bad on the phone, but the nav completely breaks the site for me. And presentation is a two-second fix in CSS anyway.

    Recent posts list must be readily available, maybe as a button (or better yet, a cookied preference) on the main page. Or at the very least, easily-accessible list of the individual blogs with the name or date of the most recent post visible. Not being dramatic to say I simply won’t keep spending that amount of time to read the seven or eight blogs I read regularly, will probably cut down to one or two, and visit the others I like occasionally. The rest I’ll never see.

    None of which is addressing the horrendous accessibility issues for anyone with fine motor skill or visual impairment, and probably several others I’m privileged to not know about.

    Seriously. Nav is a big issue here. :(

  110. birgerjohansson says

    Cosmo’s Ridiculous Ode to Lesbian Sex Positions. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jenny-block/cosmo-lesbian-sex-tips_b_5629100.html

    .
    Research reveals pervasive implicit hierarchies for race, religion, and age http://medicalxpress.com/news/2014-07-reveals-pervasive-implicit-hierarchies-religion.html

    .
    Buying pot in Christiania http://satwcomic.com/no-problem
    .
    What the hell? “Ibuprofen relieves women’s hurt feelings, not men’s” http://medicalxpress.com/news/2014-08-ibuprofen-relieves-women-men.html

  111. opposablethumbs says

    CaitieCat, can I copy and past it for you? I can well imagine that’s a pain on a phone.

  112. opposablethumbs says

    Done. I only ever use a desktop but gah, there are very few sites I can think would be comfortable to use on a phone – especially if they demand lots of scrolling around or force you to choose between that and having teenytiny type only a youthful lynx could read (well, if lynxes could read …)

  113. says

    CaitieCat, yeah, I have a feeling I’m going to miss a lot on FTB with the new format – I’m going to put the few blogs I read regularly on my feedly and hope I’ll fall into anything else interesting, becuae the new front page is unbrowsable.

  114. says

    I think they’ll twist and tweak things in the coming days…

    +++
    Bit o-whining…
    That house I had my eye on? It’s apparently already sold. But it doesn’t matter because it turns out that we need to talk further about where we actually want to live.
    Yes, I thought we’d had that conversation already. And I thought we had agreed on “here” and were both happy with that idea. Only that Mr. (you may remember that he’s only home at the weekends and works in the next state) keeps asking “well, unless you want to move to state-I’m-working-in after graduation?”. Which gave me the weird feeling that I was being asked until I said “yes”, making it my decission. Which is the way he tends to communicate. It’s just a different version of him asking 3 times in a row “what’s for dinner” when what he means is “I’m very hungry, could we eat early today?”

  115. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    ButchKitties,

    *hugs*
    Best wishes to you and your husband.

  116. says

    An empowering new grassroots effort to help the many victims of sexual violence is quickly turning into something of an Internet phenomenon. Strangers across the web get together to share stories and offer solace through the Tumblr, “I Believe You | It’s Not Your Fault.”

    “I Believe You” is growing at a rapid pace. Representing the wide variety of ways women and men are victimized in America, the stories shared there can be difficult to read and they highlight abuses of power, disrespect and dehumanization with one important emphasis — we believe your stories, and they are not your fault.

    […]

    The page, which also bears that very title, has been flooded with heart-wrenching stories within the past week about how women have been violated, have felt negated and have suffered deep trauma and anguish when their experiences were belittled by those in whom they trusted — fathers, mothers and even friends. But this is not just a confessions page for women to reveal horrible accounts of rape, assault and violation.

    “I Believe You | It’s Not Your Fault” functions as a community where women offer support to teenagers and other women going through experiences they are too scared to share, and to tell them there is someone who trusts in them, no matter what. This serves a potentially inspirational, purposeful and even educational purpose. These women write about intimate situations where they didn’t know that they could say “no” or when they blamed themselves for being abused, so that readers can understand that they are not alone.

    http://mic.com/articles/95124/with-one-simple-phrase-women-across-the-internet-are-taking-a-stand-against-rape-culture
    ‘I believe you. It’s not your fault.’
    I like this.

  117. blf says

    A question for the combined mindlessness of the hoarde: What makes a key suddenly start sticking in a tumbler lock, and How the Feck do you Make It Stop?

    The deadbolt lock on the front door to the relocated lair has decided it loves the key and won’t let go. I have to wiggle and yank to get the bloody thing out, and do not (at the present time) know precisely what does convince the lock to let go of the key.

    This started about a week ago. To-date, I’ve tried cleaning the key (albeit I note there is still some “gunk” in part of some of the slots); and last night, blasted the key with WD-40, let it dry overnight and tried it today — no obvious change, it still sticks. (I am loathe to squirt any WD-40 into the lock itself.)

    The lock itself, after I used some WD-40 on the interior (inside-the-lair) knob’s axle so that I could turn the bloody thing (about seven months ago), has been working perfectly up to now.

    I’m severely tempted to go find the mildly deranged penguin and let her deal with it, or use her to deal with it, whichever fixes the problem…

    In the meantime, any ideas / advice ?

  118. says

    Any metal-on-metal interaction has a couple of go-tos when diagnosing friction.

    Temperature: has the temperature been unusually high (given it’s summer there) recently? Different metal expansion coefficients could cause misalignments, which might have trouble returning to normal states.

    Rust: any unusual moisture introduced?

    Gum: any kind of sticky stuff get on someone’s key? Spill a cola on the keys maybe?

    That’s the obvious ones. Beyond that, you’d pretty much have to have a locksmith.

    If there’s been great heat, you could try cooling the lock some. If there’s rust, that’s trickier, and probably a locksmith. If it’s gum, then some kind of Goo Gone or something carefully swabbed in and around the lock, followed by some oil, should do it.

  119. says

    blf:
    You didn’t hear?
    We had to get rid of the MDP as our mascot.
    She was becoming the Massively Dangerous Penguin.
    We’re still searching for a new mascot (one suggestion has been a ladybug).

  120. rq says

    blf
    Check to see if the MDP is in there. Sounds awfully suspicious.
    Alternatively, the lock needs some oiling.
    Even more alternatively, you might want to prepare yourself for the key breaking off in the lock in the near future. This happened to me once, after a couple of weeks of stuck-and-wiggling keys, but thankfully it wasn’t winter and one of Eldest’s friend’s dad from the next stairwell over was home with some powertools to get us inside. :/

    Giliell
    That sucks about the house. :( And sucks about the ‘mis’communication. I hate it when that happens. I hope something mutually pleasing to both of you, in an ideal location for everyone, turns up soon. (Perhaps something just perfect on your end, where he just can’t say no…)

    in other news
    Apparently miscommunication is a thing this week. At least this weekend this resolved into Husband+Kids going out to the country, and me staying at ‘home’ to go to work. But we were both operating under completely separate assumptions, where he believed we’d decided to go this weekend, and I believed we hadn’t decided on anything, but was voting for staying because my vacation time ended last Saturday and there’s a shitload of crap I have to do at work.
    And Husband just called me to let me know that I forgot to call FamilyFriends not to come this evening because nobody’s home. They’re at the front gate. Blaaaast.
    How can I be expected to remember everything??? [/whine]

    +++

    I see comment numbers! Woo hoo!
    Now I only hope they’ll tweak up the front page to make it more navigable (since my complaints are basically an echo of Cait’s, and if there be no Around FtB box, then my FtB reading is suddenly limited).

  121. Dhorvath, OM says

    Actually, I have one lock where the cylinder is very sloppy allowing the locking mechanism to come out of alignment with it’s case. This one can be awkward both on install and removal of key and doesn’t respond to lube at all.

  122. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    If WD40 doesn’t work apply more WD40. But that’s why I don’t fix stuff.
    So… what others said.

  123. says

    My source, btw, was my Dad; he was a genius mechanic, could fix anything, and taught me to fix cars while I was but a wee sprog. I disconnected and removed the engine from his racing Mini the first time when I was six. Yay pneumatics and cranes.

    Anyway, the metal-on-metal stuff was part of the basics he taught me.

  124. A. Noyd says

    rq (#124)

    There’s no list of recent posts from Around FtB. :( I count on that little box to know what’s new.

    Same here. And there doesn’t need to be two columns for recent comments, either. But, heyyy, comment numbers are back.

    ~*~*~*~*~*~

    Anne (#130)

    A “Return to top of page” button (because scrolling back up to the top of a long page with my finger is a pain in… the finger.

    Try your “home” key, and if you don’t have one of those, I think on the PC you can do ctrl + left arrow key to get to the top in an instant. As for the tablet, I use an iPad and can tap near the top of the browser to get it to scroll up all the way in one shot. I imagine yours has something similar.

  125. says

    The PC isn’t the problem – my little tablet is. Emily has an iPad, so she checked Nixie to see if there was a way to scroll up quickly, but so far nothing works. I’ll play around a bit more, but it looks like I’ll be doing it the hard way. Grumph.

  126. says

    Ann Coulter tries to outdo herself:

    Coulter added, “I just wish we would talk about our border the way we talk about Israel’s border.”

    “We need a Netanyahu here. Can you imagine all these — yes, sometimes Palestinian kids get killed, ” she said as she began to laugh. “That’s because they are, they’re associated with a terrorist organization that is harming Israel, and Netanyahu doesn’t care what the religious leaders say, weeping about Palestinian children. He doesn’t care what the UN says. He doesn’t care what the media says.”

    She concludes, “We are a country, we have borders, and Netanyahu enforces them. Why can’t we do that in America?”
    http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/08/01/ann-coulter-why-cant-we-deal-with-our-border-the-way-netanyahu-deals-with-hamas/

    I think she succeeds. That is just loathsome.

  127. rq says

    *sigh* Still can’t post comments on some blogs from work computer. Woe is me. I guess my wisdom can wait ’til I get home.

  128. blf says

    Whilst WD-40 is wonderful “fix-it” stuff, I am very reluctant to spray any into the lock / cylinder.

    Temperature, and gum, are very unlikely to the issue.

    The spare key idea was a useful idea — it worked almost perfectly. I could insert it, turn the lock, and remove the spare key without almost any sticking. (It did seem to want to stick once; I do not know if that was a outlier or a warning…)

    Both keys are flat (no obvious bending at all), checked by laying on a flat surface (first on one side, then turning the key over).

    Examining the two keys closely under a handglass, it may be the case one of the teeth on the sticking key is bent just a tiny bit more to the side than on the spare, working-Ok key. Not absolutely sure on that…

    And I also noticed my spare key is much cleaner than my normal, supposedly cleaned, key. So I think I will get a bit more assertive about cleaning the key. I might even use a pea!

    (I once broke a key in lock, but happened to have some needle-nosed pliers with me, and managed to extract the broken key, after first turning it in the lock to open the door…)

    And I suspect once the mildly deranged penguin returns, she’ll start throwing peas at a certain Stoop. Or at least remind said Stoop his father was a rotten raspberry and his mother could be refined for diesel fuel-oil.

  129. toska says

    Hi, I’m new here. I’ve been lurking for a while (maybe less than a year? Can’t remember), and I’m somewhat newly deconverted, so I’ve been fishing around atheist communities and forums, and I’ve found that I love the content on ftb. You guys, the regular commentariot, have helped me piece together my thoughts on so many issues, even though I generally don’t engage (I’m a bit of an extreme introvert, even in cyberspace).

    And Tony!, your link at #153 is not surprising to me. I live in MT, so it was disheartening to see so many hate crimes in my general area of the US, but again, not surprising in the least.

  130. toska says

    And holy fuck @Ann Coulter! She’s a professional troll, and it’d be so easy to dismiss her if so many people didn’t take her so seriously.

  131. Dhorvath, OM says

    Spray triflow would be a better choice in a lock as it is basically dry once the propellant is gone. No sticky stuff for dirt to stick to and gum up the internals.

  132. rq says

    Hi, toska, welcome in!
    Cookies are over there, Tony mixes drinks (alcoholic and non, so just ask!), there’s usually some grog around, and excuse the appearance, we were ummm redecorating recently.
    But first, you must prove your allegiance to the Hivemind, by expressing an opinion on the following three things:
    1) peas;
    2) horses;
    3) cheese.
    Thank you, and here, have one of the comfy chairs. (Tomorrow you’ll have to fight for it, but just relax for tonight!) ;)

  133. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    In other news, tomorrow I’m meeting a friend I haven’t seen in a year and a half. Yay!
    I’m quite close to where she moved to so we’re meeting in another town. Don’t ask me why I’m not just visiting her, but she didn’t invite me so I didn’t ask. Maybe she doesn’t like anyone to come to her home? Or she thought it would inconvenient me so we’re both just being needlesly overly nice :)

    Doesn’t matter. I’m really glad we’re meeting.

  134. blf says

    I’ve never been able to find triflow in France. (The local bike shop, for instance, has never heard of the stuff.) I concur, if I had some, I would consider spraying it into the lock and, possibly, cylinder.

  135. Dhorvath, OM says

    Peas, horses, and cheese? In my day it was Miracle Whip. Oh, hey, you can’t stand there.

  136. Dhorvath, OM says

    Okay, bike shop may have other teflon based lubes though. Problem is they likely only stock drip bottles which are not much good at getting inside of horizontal complex mechanisms.

  137. toska says

    1. Peas: Only when mixed with rice
    2. Horses: Loves of my life (my nym is a variation of a deceased horse of mine)
    3. Cheese: I eat way too much of the stuff.

    I’m definitely going for those comfy chairs! My work chair is less than optimal ;)

  138. blf says

    I do have a drip bottle of some lube from the bike shop which I think is Teflon-based (I’m not going to go find the bottle right now to check), but, as said, that’s not much good for this situation.

    Maybe I’ll try and pay a visit a to the big D.I.Y. shop tomorrow. They might have some triflow or suitable (spray) alternative — and more importantly, there’s a “gourmet” food hall next door…

  139. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    I spray some graphite key lubricant into sticky locks. The graphite particles acts as a dry lubricant after the oil dries. Spray toward the side where the key teeth go, then insert and remove the key several times to further lubricate the internal mechanism.

  140. says

    And I see that Nerd beat me to it, and more clearly. Thanks, Nerd!

    Our kitchen sinks drain is still very slooooowwwww. I can’t wash dishes yet, and I’m not sure if the dishwasher will be available tonight either. So, I have made a command decision – the daughters and I are getting takeout from the local family burger joint for lunch. So there, life.

  141. says

    http://sploid.gizmodo.com/nasa-reveals-new-impossible-engine-can-change-space-t-1614549987?utm_campaign=socialflow_gizmodo_facebook&utm_source=gizmodo_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

    Sawyer’s engine is extremely light and simple. It provides a thrust by “bouncing microwaves around in a closed container.” The microwaves are generated using electricity that can be provided by solar energy. No propellant is necessary, which means that this thrusters can work forever unless a hardware failure occurs. If real, this would be a major breakthrough in space propulsion technology.

    Obviously, the entire thing sounded preposterous to everyone. In theory, this thing shouldn’t work at all. So people laughed and laughed and ignored him. Everyone except a team of Chinese scientists. They built one in 2009 and it worked: They were able to produce 720 millinewton, which is reportedly enough to build a satellite thruster. And still, nobody else believed it.

    Now, American scientist Guido Fetta and a team at NASA Eagleworks—the advanced propulsion skunkworks led by Dr Harold “Sonny” White at the Johnson Space Center—have published a new paper that demonstrates that a similar engine working on the same principles does indeed produce thrust. Their model, however, produces much less thrust—just 30 to 50 micronewtons. But it works, which is amazing on its own. They haven’t explained why their engine works, but it does work:

  142. blf says

    Huh. I’ve never heard of graphite key lube before.

    Just to be clear: The problem is not the cylinder sticking (it turns just fine), and is not the bolt sticking (it slides in and out Ok), but that I cannot easily remove one key from the lock (whether or not I turn the cylinder). The other (spare) key seems Ok, but it did want to stick that one time…

  143. says

    Anne, I’m sure Alex will fix those things now he knows, no worries. Nothing I’ve seen suggests incompetence, merely an inability to live in the heads of thousands of other people pre-emptively, which, to be fair, I’m unable to do as well. :)

    Doing a bit better today, physically, which is also helping my brain. Also helping is that the rent is paid for another month. I have twenty dollars left for the month at this point, but I have plenty of food, and other than my phone bill and some meds next week, I’ve no expenses coming up soon. So that’s okay. Problems as far off as next week are way beyond my ken.

    Oh! I remembered the other thing i wanted to say. Craig, my temp flatmate, has a Youtube show he does, called The Gamers’ Table. Not sure about the apostrophe there, might be the other side of the S. But, in any case, he does it. In that capacity, he gets sent games to review by game companies, and yesterday the board game of Firefly arrived. So we played it, and my one-word review is Shiny!

    (much) Longer, it has top-notch production values, but the rulebook could use a light edit and an index. The pseudo-art-deco look on the cards is gorgeous, to my eyes, and the board, cardstock, and game pieces are great quality. The models of the Firefly ships are great, and the Reaver cutter, though our Alliance Cruiser is a bit wilted – kinda bent and sad-looking. It needs a good hair-dryering and some clamps, I suspect.

    Game mechanics successfully gave us the sense of being captains of small ‘trading’ (ahem) vessels, with the option of choosing cheaper and easier legal jobs, or the higher-paying but riskier illegal and/or immoral jobs. Choosing, early on, whether to recruit a new crew member or buy fuel was a tough choice, and that’s excellent. We both found ourselves quoting the shows constantly, because situations or events reminded us of stuff.

    Though the game is nominally competitive, it’s a competition against the standard set by the game, rather than directly with one another. There is a mechanic for filching one another’s crew, but we didn’t run up against it in our two-player game, and only three times did we interact with the game in such a way as to directly interfere with the other (Craig got to jump me with the Cruiser twice, which was deflating after I used the Crybaby to get away the first time, and was laughing at my cleverness when it showed up in the next space too!; I also found him once with the Reaver, which was altogether more nasty).

    It may well be that under different Story cards (the goal defining the winning conditions, and the path to get to them, which changes each game), the need for competition directly might be greater, but basically it’s a capitalist competition: who can cut costs more to profit more quickly.

    Decisions we faced:

    Do I cut through Alliance space, even though the cruiser JUMP DOWN YOUR THROAT card hasn’t come up yet, and there are only four cards left in the Alliance space deck? Or would it be better to take a longer route, since the reavers are way off on the other side of Persephone?

    Should I stop to pick up this salvage spot, and grab some cargo or contraband I could punt on to a contact, or should I keep flying and get the job done, get paid?

    Should I go see Niska, knowing that if I fail his job he’ll kill some of my crew but he pays WAY better for his illegal/immoral jobs? Or should I stick with Amnon the post office guy, or Harken the Alliance jerk, for safer but lower-paid legal work?

    Buy fuel this turn, or get flying because I need to reach the next Goal before the others do, and hope I don’t get stopped too much doing Full Burn?

    Buy a new drive core, to allow me to fly faster and more fuel-efficiently, or keep the money and toddle along with the basic engine?

    Do I buy the cheaper Fake ID that is discardable to use, or the “real” Fake ID that you can re-use endlessly?

    Hire Simon Tam, with his incredible medical skills and Wanted status, or hire a cheaper, legal medic with less skill?

    Sorry, that got really long, but end recommendation is this: if you like Arkham Horror, and you like Firefly, then Firefly the Board Game will be right up your gorram alley. It’s relatively simple to learn, and I suspect (we’ll confirm tonight when we go to Game Night at Chad’s) that it’ll be even easier when taught. It’s expandable, and there already are expansions, as well as dress-up versions of the game coming (painted resin ship models, and such kinda fancy stuff).

    So…anyone think I should get on with starting the Gamers’ Table blog I was thinking of starting, and that Craig is on board with? Do I write a useable game review? Would there be other stuff you’d add, or lose? Stuff you’d want to know? Links? Anyone feel like critiquing?

  144. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Blf #190, your spring loaded pins that ride on the key teeth are sticking. When they do, it happens exactly as you say. A little graphite lube causes the pins to slide by each other as designed.

  145. ButchKitties says

    CaitieCat
    Gamers’ Table blog! Pretty please? I would certainly read it. The Mister and I have been playing fewer video games and more tabletop games lately, and we are going to have lots of downtime in our future. Reviews would be lovely. We’re always on the lookout for new games. One can only play so many rounds of King of Tokyo.

  146. rq says

    toska
    Good answers. I notice you disagree with at least 3 people on each topic, so you’re good to go. Hivemind for you! :)

    Beatrice
    Have fun with Friend! I find it awesome to meet up with people I haven’t seen in [x] years, and to discover that we can still talk for hours on end about interesting stuff. Hope it goes the same for you!

    Dhorvath
    If we can’t stand there, where should I stand? It’s not your lawn, nyah.

    +++

    The trouble with working off-hours: no tech support available. Mildly pissed off. Ran for the train to get into work tonight, because I’m so damned conscientious, and now I can’t access the network that I need in order to do everything. Normally restarting and/or shutting down for a while works, but not today. The Network is being an ass and not letting me access anything. :( Anyone with advice? Should I persist, or should I just take the next train home? (Technically, that still means I have an hour to fuck around and see if things wake up or not, which they probably will – 5 minutes before I have to leave.)
    Once again, woe is me.

  147. Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    @Gorogh, #79, speaking of BDSM (I think):

    is it considered pathological in DSM?

    They have a catch-all diagnosis for paraphilias not otherwise specified.

    however to be a paraphilia, the person experiencing it must have:
    1. a significantly impaired ability to orgasm without the paraphilic fetish/activity
    2. Clinical distress – this would translate into wanting to have non-BDSM sex, but finding oneself unable to do so, or unable to be (sufficiently?) happy while having other kinds of sex. This unhappiness must persist as distress outside of the moment of having other kinds of sex (otherwise it’s just a preference). An ongoing preoccupation with why one cannot have satisfactory versions of other kinds of sex is likely how this would manifest for someone actually diagnosable.
    3. It has to impair significant life activities. If it’s ruining your marriage or getting your kids taken away by child services, or if you find yourself getting a talking to from the boss b/c you’ve had too many sick days and you know it’s because of something related to your BDSM sex, any or all of that might qualify. Obviously boss’s concern is less serious than losing your kids. There’s a range of possibilities here, but it has to cause problems in your non-sex life. Even if that’s just that you can’t find a long term partner b/c partnerships carry with them the expectation of sexual engagement, but many aspects of partnership are part of the world of “non-sex life” for these purposes.

    I’m not up with the DSM 5, if I’ve misstated anything, I hope to be corrected.

  148. rq says

    CaitieCat
    I’d be interested in reading a blog about tabletop (and card*?) gaming. I’m not too big on it myself, but I’ve noticed a budding interest in the children (Middle Child drew himself a stack of monsters-of-all-kinds, gave them all specific powers that he somehow remembers (there’s about 60 of them, and yes, some powers overlap and come down to size of teeth or number of eyes), and he made up some (rather arbitrary and sometimes flexible) rules, but we still manage to play his monster game as a family every now and then), so I might as well get educated about various options out there. :)
    (With an additional Thank You to Hekuni Cat, whose Fluxx card game I received in the mail this morning, and it looks like one interesting activity to keep up this kind of interest.)

    * I mean those games that use cards in general, not necessarily the usual playing cards with which one plays poker and the like.

  149. rq says

    When I was growing up, they were homonyms, not homophones… Oh, they had issues with the first few letters? (Yes, I know about synonyms, too. But those sound pretty evil, too.)
    Someone needs a grammar lesson (okay, okay, vocabulary…).

  150. rq says

    Also, from my bored cruising of local internet news, apparently I need to have a neat, tidy and clean house in order to have great sex. Otherwise I will be too distracted by all the dust bunnies to enjoy myself, and the gods forbid I have mismatching pillow covers. *shudder*
    Carry on.

  151. says

    Yay, the page gets bigger or smaller when I tap it, again! Thank you Alex!

    The kitchen drains are working again. I got us takeout lunch anyway, because I deserved it, so there. Since I can’t trust anybody but me to refrain from pouring grease and other cloggy things down the drain, let alone remember to run the damn disposal when they wash the cat dishes last thing at night, I’m going to set myself up another scheduled maintenance. As soon as I decide how frequent it should be, anyway. Miniature disasters and minor catastrophes, sigh.

  152. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Obama starting his statement with “Israel has a right to defend themselves”….
    and I’m not hearing a but yet.

  153. says

    kind of ‘rupt
    Tony #189
    Oh lard, tis the Dean Drive all over again. This time around, it looks to be another version of the ionocraft, a well known principle. Why NASA didn’t test the damn thing in a vacuum is beyond me.

    rq #198

    When I was growing up, they were homonyms, not homophones…

    Homonyms are spelled the same but have different meanings, homophones are pronounced the same but have different spellings and meanings.
    re: the rent, it’s not that they wanted three times the rent up front, we could have possibly dealt with that, it’s that they want proof that our monthly income is three times the monthly rent or they won’t even process our application.

  154. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Well, it was “at the same time” instead of “but” and it was kinda weak.
    Quite weak. And we’re on to Hamas and Isrealy soldiers being killed again.
    He wants to make sure everything being done so that Palestinian civilians aren’t killed. BUt……. but Hamas.

    And the same old story. It’s soooo difficult because Israel has a right to defense, but Hamas is at the same time making them shoot civilians. Bad Hamas!

  155. rq says

    Dalillama
    My forays into internet dictionaries say they’re the same thing: homonym and homophone. Not really seeing the difference in definitions…?
    And that’s still crappy about the rent, if anything even crappier. Why three times the amount? It seems excessive. And sounds like they’re discriminating against low-income renters. Unfortunately, the best I can do from here is send extremely angry looks in their general direction. :(

  156. toska says

    rq,
    Good to hear there is healthy disagreement! We’re all agreed on the awesomeness of cats though, right? I mean, this IS the internet.

  157. rq says

    toska
    Even PZ may agree with you on the cats, these days – ever since he got adopted by a rather beautiful specimen.

    Beatrice
    See, that’s what I find so difficult to stomach… It’s not like someone from Hamas is forcing Israel’s ‘defense’ forces to fire on those people. They’re not over there, sticking fingers on buttons and aiming all those loverly crosshairs at UN schools and such. That’s Israelis doing it themselves. Restraint? Don’t make me laugh. If Israel wanted the high moral ground, they could have taken it many civilian deaths ago. Anyway. This conversation should probably go to the Thunderdome. :/

  158. says

    rq:
    From your ‘homonym’ link:

    The word homonyms (“same” + “names”) is, strictly speaking, either a synonym for homophones or a name for words that are at once homophones and homographs —alike in both spelling and pronunciation—such as the two words spelled b-e-a-r and the three spelled s-o-u-n-d. As a practical matter, however, the terms homophone, homograph and homonym are often distinguished from one another by the contexts in which they are found.

  159. morgan ?! epitheting a metaphor says

    Toska, welcome to da Lounge. We are remodeling, so to speak, (things got a bit torched recently) so feel free to contribute your creativity. BTW, I’m Morgan and I make soup. Lots of soup. I’m installing a soup station and you can make requests. And don’t worry about being an extreme introvert. I’m one too, and it sometimes leads me to make weird comments that I only realize are weird until after the fact. But folks are nice about it.

    We have myriad pillows for pillow forts so help yourself. And rq’s sledgehammer is out back with a lot of wrecked stuff. Feel free to go pound the hell out of the stuff when you need to let off steam.

    Always nice to have new Horders.

  160. toska says

    Dalillama
    The 3x rent income rule is common where I live, too. I’ve had the same problem many times, and it’s ridiculously excessive. I hope you find another place soon.

  161. says

    rq
    What Tony! said; the way I was taught, homonym is a subcategory of homophone. So, for instance bay: an inlet off a large body of water and bay: the noise made by hunting hounds would be homonyms, but pole: a long cylindrical piece of material and poll: a vote or survey are not homonyms but are homophones.

  162. rq says

    Tony
    Well, they’re still mostly the same thing to me (but I am not a grammarian), and I would presume that the people in the article would still take issue with all of those terms. :)

  163. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    rq,
    yeah, sorry for mucking up the lounge.

  164. toska says

    Hi, Morgan!
    I think the weird contributions from us introverts are part of what make the internet such an interesting place :)

  165. rq says

    Dalillama
    That’s interesting, because I was taught only homonyms (as being alike in pronunciation, differing in meaning, and could be either alike or different in spelling). But that was back in *ahem* grade 2, so it may have been a function of not confusing the children. And since little of grammar was covered in my later education (seriously, I had teachers who tried in grades 11 and 12 and OA with Grammar Tuesdays and such, but it never stuck), I will confess myself to be mostly ignorant of the nuances of this particular situation. You have the floor, good person. :)

  166. rq says

    Beatrice
    I’ll happily muck up the Thunderdome with you on this topic, if you still want to have a go at it. Alternatively, Mano has a couple of threads where you can have a go at StevoR and his bullshit, if you can stomach it (pretty horrendous stuff, though – that’s a warning).
    I’m just going to restart the computer again and try again for that elusive network.

  167. morgan ?! epitheting a metaphor says

    Hmmmmm, grammar. In middle school (1950s!) we were taught sentence diagramming and I loved it. Somehow it clicked with my brain and I could even diagram complex Faulknerian sentences with ease. (Faulkner’s books generally had 300 or so pages and four to five sentences in the entire book.)

    I’m wondering if I could create an artwork of some sort out of a diagrammed Faulknerian sentence. Hmmmmmm.

  168. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    rq,

    good luck with the network. I’m listening to CNN, so that’s upseting enough. I don’t think I could stomach StevoR.

    And I’m sleepy already.

  169. cicely says

    New Look is…unsettling.
    Judgement reserved.

    Some good news from Uganda: its constitutional court has annulled the vile anti-gay law.

    Huzzah!

    Hi, kage; Welcome In!

    Giliell, that’s an interesting bag. I’ve noticed that general motif (Day-glo of the Dead?) a lot recently, I’m not sure if it’s been there all along and I’ve been oblivious, or if it’s truly Newly Popular.

    blf, I have a friend who’s a locksmith, and who I’ll be seeing tonight.
    (Game Night!!!! *thwip!*)
    I’ll try to remember to ask him about the lock thing.

    Ann Coulter is working hard to earn the year’s Worst Human Being Award.
    I’d say she’s gaining ground on the competition.

    Hi, toska; Welcome In!

    177

  170. toska says

    Regarding the new WW photo, does anyone else think she looks much more Xena than WW? Since Xena was a big part of my childhood, I can’t help seeing her in that image instead of WW. Not that I’m complaining; I much prefer it over the American flag outfit she is typically seen in.

  171. says

    toska:
    There are similarities, yes.
    Yet another reason I wish they wouldn’t mute the colors so much. The red should be a little brighter, and FFS, her lasso is supposed to be *golden*.

  172. says

    The president shouldn’t be using a fateful and divisive word like “impeachment” to raise money and rouse his base. He shouldn’t be at campaign-type rallies where he speaks only to the base, he should be speaking to the country. He shouldn’t be out there dropping his g’s, slouching around a podium, complaining about his ill treatment, describing his opponents with disdain: “Stop just hatin’ all the time.”

    That, my friends, is Peggy Noonan doing her best to make President Obama look bad. http://online.wsj.com/articles/out-of-many-two-1406845039
    Maybe we should sue the president for dropping his “g’s”.

    I think we’ll have to add this to our list of WTF moments that come to us courtesy of right wing nut jobs.

  173. toska says

    Tony,
    The color scheme looked all bronze to me instead of red. I didn’t even notice the lasso at first glance. It definitely needs some work to stand out (like maybe actually being gold, as you said).

  174. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    I’m so sorry ButchKitties. I hope Mr. Kitty’s cancer is treatable and he recovers well.

    *bounce bounce bounce*

    Guess whose credit card number got stolen 9 days before a massive bill comes due?????

    :D :D :D :D

    (yeah, I’m not happy about this)

  175. says

    Well, this good news came about because of a technicality, but it is still good news:

    Uganda’s Constitutional Court has nullified a draconian anti-gay law that carried, among other penalties, life-long prison sentences for so-called “aggravated homosexuality.”

    In a decision Friday from a panel of five judges, the court found Uganda’s recently-enacted Anti-Homosexuality Act “null and void” because it was passed without a quorum of the necessary one-third members of parliament present. Ugandan officials have not yet announced a decision on whether they’ll appeal the ruling to the nation’s Supreme Court. […]

    http://www.msnbc.com/msnbc/court-topples-ugandas-anti-gay-law

  176. says

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/dc/obamacare-halbig-cbo-scores

    “BOOM: The Historic Proof Obamacare Foes Are Dead Wrong On Subsidies”

    […] The CBO itself has said, in a December 2012 letter to House Oversight Chair Darrell Issa (R-CA), that it never considered limited subsidies to only state exchanges, and it aligns with what other people who were involved with modeling the law’s impact have said. MIT professor Jonathan Gruber, a top Obamacare architect who sparked a small firestorm last week after a 2012 video surfaced in which he appeared to endorse the legal challengers’ view of the subsidies, pointed in an interview with TNR’s Cohn to his economic modeling as evidence that he always thought the subsidies would be available everywhere, no matter what kind of exchange was being used. […]

    But under all that scrutiny and after all its familiarity with the law, the CBO never did one thing: It never considered that subsidies would be unavailable in some states if they didn’t set up an exchange, as Auerbach told TPM this week. In all its iterations of the law, the idea that the subsidies would be available nationwide permeated all of them.

  177. rq says

    All hail the mighty bureaucracy – after a mere three weeks of calling and writing, they have redirected my taxes to the appropriate account, with original pay date as official, thereby also removing the overdue fines they had attached.

    +++

    Crap, Esteleth. :/ Any chance of things being resolved in time for the payment?

  178. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    Hi there! Uh eh something is different…

    … well and some things don’t change, threadrupt again.

    toska, welcome! Your preferences are fair enough, and while you demonstrate a certain lack of judgement with your merely conditional dislike of that dishonest vegetable, I am certain you will eventually realize that peas are simply not worth your time, sympathy, or taste buds. They make decent undead minions though. Oh btw I’m Gorogh, and I like tortoises more than almost everything else.

    Esteleth, that sucks with your credit card. Hope that’ll work out, I have the feeling such things must happen all the time.

    Crip Dyke, no surprises there re BDSM. Thanks for taking the time to write that short summary, I appreciate it!

    Dhorvath, Miracle Whip, eh? Boehner would have killed for one of those. (yeah it’s a cheap pun, but damn it, someone had to make it)

    Also, didn’t someone mention Sponge Bob recently? Watch this… I’m not convinced, but if it’s half as awesome as the last movie, then it’s worthwhile! (well if you’re drunk or in love anyway)

  179. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    I contacted the university (the payment in question is the tuition for my last (!!!!) semester of school) and they were perfectly happy to switch me from the “semester” plan (one big bill at the beginning of the semester) to the “month” plan (four small(er) bills due monthly). The first bill – due on the 10th – is small enough that I can pay it from my checking account. The other three I’ll put on my credit card when the time comes.

    And if you’re asking, “Why is Esteleth putting tuition on her credit card? Isn’t that foolish? Why not take out a loan?” the answer is that the interest rate on my credit card is lower than the interest rate of a loan, and I have sufficient credit to use my card.

  180. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    the interest rate on my credit card is lower than the interest rate of a loan

    O.o

    How on earth did that happen?

  181. A. Noyd says

    Anne (#169)

    Emily has an iPad, so she checked Nixie to see if there was a way to scroll up quickly, but so far nothing works. I’ll play around a bit more, but it looks like I’ll be doing it the hard way.

    Well, I did a quick web search and there are many people saying the Nexus doesn’t have a command to scroll to the top of a page like the iPad does (though some alternative browsers might have the function added). That’s surprisingly terrible design.

  182. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    Hi Pharyngula:

    Here’s some nasty misogyny for y’all, Wife Zone.

    Wrong thread. Try Thunderdome. And read the simple labels next time.

  183. rq says

    teedotdot
    You should have warned about thee transphobia right at the end there.

    +++

    To attempt counteraction: wrestling athlete with interest in sociology. She’s looking into gender inequality in male-dominated sports, and how that affects women’s perceptions of femininity, and credits her research in her success. Kinda cool, if you ask me.

  184. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    Azkyroth @235:

    the interest rate on my credit card is lower than the interest rate of a loan

    O.o
    How on earth did that happen

    A private student loan, not a federally-backed subsidized low-interest-rate loan. The interest rate on those fuckers runs about 8% or worse. The interest rate on my credit card is less than that.

    In other news, any lingering (there weren’t any, but whatever) beliefs I had in a benevolent creator-god were well and thoroughly smashed today. Because any deity who would inflict an untreatable disease that inevitably causes a slow, tortuous death on a young child does not bear worshipping. I of course knew such things happened, but today I actually saw it. Fuck it. Fuck all of it.

  185. Dhorvath, OM says

    Lawn? That’s a travesty. I don’t want the lawn protected, but someone was getting close to the Miracle Whip.

  186. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    The interest rate on those fuckers runs about 8% or worse. The interest rate on my credit card is less than that.

    Yeah, it’s the latter part I’m having trouble with; the absolute best credit card interest rate I’ve ever been offered is about 10%, and I see 14% or more glowingly advertised.

    Maybe it’s a non-third-world-hellhole thing….

  187. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    To be clear, it’s not that my interest rate is a lot better than that, just enough better that it (plus the less-paperwork aspect) makes sense.

    It also probably helps that I get it through my credit union.

    *shrug*

  188. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    I don’t care what the stated rate is. Essentially paid off each month since 2008. Effective interest rate, 0%.

  189. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    That’s nice that you can do that, Nerd.

    I’m not so fortunate, so I must pay attention to the interest rate.

  190. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    That’s nice that you can do that, Nerd.

    I’m not so fortunate, so I must pay attention to the interest rate.

    Seconded.

    (Although I have mostly done that, aside from things like the last major move, late paychecks due to employer income bottlenecks, and that one semester where I was denied financial aid).

  191. says

    I like this:

    Here’s the thing: most people don’t alter their oppressive behavior (especially the sort that gives them power or profit) because their heart grew three sizes or whatever.

    Historically, oppressive institutions and individuals change when it becomes unsustainable for them to continue acting the way it has. This can take the form of direct action, public outrage, boycotts, or force.

    This can also be accomplished by making oppressive attitudes and behaviors have social repercussions. If everybody out there who claims to be anti-oppression started treating bigots like the walking pieces of shit they are, we’d see some real change.

    So don’t give me your “why can’t we all just get along?” garbage. No, we can’t. There are people out there who don’t want to get along. They want to maintain and perpetuate the systems of oppression that grant them privilege. Until we stop that from being a feasible option for them, they’ll keep up that behavior.

    So if the rhetoric of some anti-oppression folks frightens you, good. Bigots deserve to be scared. They deserve to feel the same anxiety oppressed people do every day. However, unlike women, PoC, queer folks, the disabled, and the poor, they have a way out.
    http://lookatthisfuckingoppressor.tumblr.com/post/64212067491/heres-the-thing-most-people-dont-alter-their

    (via FeministBatwoman)

  192. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Seconded.

    It took a lot of work over years on my part to get the Redhead to even consider being budgeted, and then a lot of work to pad the monthly budget cover her excess spending (being told she had $X to spend, meant she had to spend $X +$Y, so I had to plan for $Y). She only really started listening when I wouldn’t argue any single purchase, only the total, and made sure she understood how long it took to pay off larger purchases, which always happened faster in her mind than in reality.

  193. cicely says

    D&D 5e looks like it has potential.

    blf, my locksmith friend says it sounds like the lock’s interior may have shifted out of adjustment, and suggests that you could dismount the whole thing and take it to a locksmith for readjustment.

    toska:

    2. Horses: Loves of my life (my nym is a variation of a deceased horse of mine)

    *shaking head sadly*
    And so, Their Evil Agenda progresses, one individual at a time.
    And peas are not food; they are entertainment. And ammo (roll a saving throw vs. poison/Constitution (depending on the game system); on a failed save, take an addition d4 damage per round, and be Incapacitated for d6 rounds (violent nausea)).

    rq:

    Also, from my bored cruising of local internet news, apparently I need to have a neat, tidy and clean house in order to have great sex. Otherwise I will be too distracted by all the dust bunnies to enjoy myself, and the gods forbid I have mismatching pillow covers. *shudder*

    *blinkblink*
    In that case, I have never in my life had great sex. No matter what I thought at the time.

    Esteleth, I’m sorry about your credit card number theft, and especially sorry about the super-inconvenient timing of it. Glad that the university seems to be handling it in a sensible manner.
    *hugs*
    God makes no mistakes. Everything happens for a reason.

    Don’t anybody stand in the Miracle Whip &re;.
    I need it for my tuna salad, and my deviled eggs.
    -

  194. rq says

    Dhorvath (and cicely, I suppose)
    Oh, that’s Miracle Whip? I thought it was a particularly lively slime mould.

    Esteleth
    I’m glad the university is being understanding!
    And *hugs*, who needs god when you can have us, anyway? :(

  195. chigau (違う) says

    I ♥ peas.
    I am willing to accommodate pea haters.
    but Miracle Whip ®
    no
    NO
    it is an abomination unto all thinking beings
    it’s in the same class as ‘whip cream’ in a spray can
    ([{deep rifts}])

  196. sammy96604 says

    Someone has asked me questions I don’t know how to answer. I don’t science; can somebody help me out?

    In the United States in the 1950s (standard Decade of Sexism), what percentage of domestic violence was reported to the police? What percentage of domestic violence is reported to the police today? Regardless of reporting, is the total amount of domestic violence constant?

    My answer at the time was that I had no idea. My only thoughts are maybe I could compare studies on self-reported domestic violence to domestic violence statistics over a period of time? I Googled “self reported domestic violence” but that was not helpful; it was all studies about how domestic violence statistics correlate with statistics about public health. That’s interesting but it does not answer any of those questions.

  197. jefrir says

    rq

    (Middle Child drew himself a stack of monsters-of-all-kinds, gave them all specific powers that he somehow remembers (there’s about 60 of them, and yes, some powers overlap and come down to size of teeth or number of eyes), and he made up some (rather arbitrary and sometimes flexible) rules, but we still manage to play his monster game as a family every now and then), so I might as well get educated about various options out there. :)

    It sounds like he might enjoy Smash Up – you have decks of cards for various groups, such as ghosts, wizards, zombies, etc, each player takes two decks and shuffles them together, then uses them to attack bases. It’s good fun, and can involve a decent amount of strategy.
    If you want to check out a specific game, boardgamegeek is the main site. It has it’s own rating system, and also links to various reviews. Helpfully, it also rates games on what age they work for and how many players they play best with – so if you want two-player games you can filter out the ones that actually play well with 2 from the distressingly large number where “2-x players” actually means “the game mechanics work with 2 players, but say goodbye to 90% of your strategic choices”.

    ———————————————-

    And… I have a new job! Working in the acquisitions department of a university library, so I can get away from the customer service side of things, and importantly, it’s full time and permanent. Yay, (small amounts of) spare money! I’m pretty much bouncing-off-the-walls happy right now.

  198. says

    Oh, jefrir, that’s wonderful news! Congratulations, sincerely. It’s great to hear someone getting really good news about financial stuff, for a change. :)

    Bounce away! When I was accepted for my Master’s program, I literally bounced off the walls in my summer sublet. I ran from wall to wall, and bounced off them. Well, most of them. I knocked a hole in one, which is when I discovered that the outer room in my suite had walls made of faux wood-panel, with nothing but well-spaced studs underneath. ò,Ô

    本当におめでとうございます!! (Japanese, if you didn’t know)

  199. rq says

    jefrir
    Congratulations on the new job!
    re: Smash Up – sounds pretty good, though the recommended age starts at 12, and Middle Child is only 4. Is it simple enough to be understood by someone that age?

    CaitieCat
    I presume you missed the studs…? :o

  200. says

    rq: I presume you missed the studs…?

    I did.

    As usual.

    Well, except for that one time at Yule, with that amazing guy Tarver, with the really LONGEST di-

    Erm, sorry, never mind.

    *blushes a bit*

    I’ll be in my bunk.

  201. says

    Good morning

    *hugs* for Esteleth

    Yay for Jefrir

    cicely
    Yes, dia de los muertos is becoming pretty popular. I’m generally not the most skully person, but I love the Mexican calavera motives (and the idea behind the dia de los muertos in general)

    +++
    I don’t understand the age instructions on craft kits
    Rainbow Looms is really popular here right now, so I got a starter set. The age label says 8+, but the basic pattern is so easy the little one at not quite 5 is totally able to do it and #1 hasn’t been doing much else since I got it…

  202. rq says

    CaitieCat
    The moment I hit ‘submit’ on that comment, I knew something like that would come up.
    There goes my solitary, quiet, clean-minded morning. :)

  203. rq says

    Giliell
    I’ve noticed that about the age labelling, too. Either my kids are super-precocious (they’re smart, but not THAT smart), or kit- and game-makers are seriously up-playing the difficulties. I start wondering about their ability to follow the instructions when it says something like 12+, but anything below 10? Never had any issues.

  204. says

    rq

    Aww…I’m really sorry, rq.

    (I’m not really sorry at all). ;)

    Mmm. Plus, remembering Tarver is in no way a bad thing for my evening. Or any other part of the day. Super hot, first met me when I was naked (as was he, and a number of other people; it was a very sex-friendly all-night Yule party), and we ended up first making out and then…ahem…rather more, and remembering it still affects me in a lovely, warm, and very pleasant manner when ever it happens. So yeah. In no way bad.

    Time to hit the bunk, f’realz. You Loungers are Teh Awesomez.

    Oh, oh, toska, hi, sorry I didn’t say so earlier, but hi! Very happy to have more new Loungerie about the place. Please be at home, and tell us what you feel like. I’m Cait, which you can call me if CaitieCat gets to be a handful. I pronounce it in the North American way (like Kate), rather than the original Irish way (as basically “Cat’). I’m an aging, physically broken, bi-dyke, polyglot/translator/editor in Ontario, Canada, near Toronto. I’m a sort-of-Marxist definite-feminist, raised atheist, lefter than the breast Napoleon liked to fondle. :)

    War (HUH!) what is it good for? Absolutely NOTHING (Goodnight y’all!)

  205. says

    Giliell & rq, I suspect liability issues: if I say it’s for 4+, as it might well be, then someone might give it to their not-very-bright 4-year-old, who promptly shoves something into its gob and chokes. Preemptively, if they advertise it as for 10+, it’s going to be harder to blame them for letting your 4-year-old play with it.

    IANAL, so speculative, but it seems possible, and to me, likely. Now I’m really one, and I’ll stick the landing.

  206. rq says

    CaitieCat
    That sounds like a logical thought process, actually.
    And @270 was a reply to 268, not your comment-on-the-doorstep @269. :)

  207. 2kittehs says

    Hello everyone! I’m back, finally able to log in again. I’m kittehserf over on We Hunted The Mammoth. I’ll probably lurk more than comment (it’s too cold this time of year to go showing my arse) but it’ s nice to be able to say hi.

    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk- @137, you embroidered those motifs? Stunning work! I love seeing people’s crafts. Knitting’s my thing these days.

  208. says

    Caitie
    Hmmm, maybe in more, ehm, litigatious countries, but in Germany, once it’s 3+ and you’re not criminally negligent, you’re generally off the hook. So the recommendations are usually paedagogical advice because nothing destroys your kid’s interest in craft or science quite as much as not being able to do something.
    Sleep well. love

    2kittehs
    Well, yes, but it’s machine embroidery. I don’t want to claim that it’s nothing, but it’s not as amzing as people think when they have hand embroidery in mind.

  209. Nick Gotts says

    Repeated from last thread: is no-one (I mean, no Pharyngulites other than me”) going to be in Edinburgh 13-14 August??? I know rq isn’t going to make it, but I thought someone else mentioned they were (Beatrice?).

    PZ’s visit to Edinburgh

    As many will be aware, PZ is speaking at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, the event being organised by Edinburgh Skeptics and Skeptics in the Pub, 7pm, 14 August. I recall that at least a couple of regulars were hoping to be in Edinburgh for the event, but AFAIK I’m the only one currently staying in Edinburgh. There’s an opportunity for a Pharyngula meal/drink/other event: PZ is currently free on the afternoon and evening of 13th, morning and afternoon of 14th. Could anyone interested please either post their availability and preferences here, or email me (kg17291729 at gmail dot com – not my main email) as soon as possible?

  210. says

    Kind of ‘rupt, had a long, slow shift at work. (Two extra hours on my shift, an extra show upstairs, and I maybe a third the amount of cooking I’d have expected to do on an ordinary Friday night. I’d gripe less, but a) it was boring as all hell, and b) I get a cut of the house based on the amount of food I make, so my wallet’s light too.)
    sammy96604
    I suspect the answer to your first question is that nobody knows for sure, but the vast majority of domestic violence wasn’t reported, or, in many cases, illegal.
    Azzy
    Yeah, already. This is one reason I quit buying D&D products back during the splatbook explosion right before TSR went under. Ever since WotC bought the title Marketing has been calling the shots, and it shows. If I wanted to play goddamned World of Warcraft, I’d be doing so.

    Miracle Whip is milk drawn from the bilious teats of Shub-Niggurath.

  211. opposablethumbs says

    Hi Lounge –

    huge conga rats to jefrir, that sounds wonderful! My idea of a perfect job, really, surrounded by books and journals and no customers :-D

    a little bit rupt-ish, because I’m lucky enough to have a few days’ worth of work to do right now, but assorted greetings to you all. (hope you are able to get the credit card replaced with no hassle, Esteleth, and that no-one succeeds in ripping you off).
    .
    .
    ahem. Top Sekret.
    .
    Hi rq!

    :waves back over the sea::

    Sure, no problem – I’m flattered! Mind you tell her I’m chronically shy and retiring in rl and don’t have an interesting thought in my head, though :-)

    I do have a problem, though – my email programme (Thunderbird) seems to have something wrong at my end – I must have messed up the settings somehow, though I swear I never touched them – and it looks like I can receive but not send. I have no idea what the problem is. So I’m going to try I tried sending this, dammit, and if that fails oh yes it failed all right, so I guess I’ll have to post it in the Lounge (I’ll take the names out first, though :-) )

    We’re all hanging in there ok and stumbling more or less successfully (touch wood) from one mini-crisi to the next, so it’s all good really – the big thing at the moment is preparing for SonSpawn to go (and I can’t believe I’m saying this, that it’s actually happening) and start his undergraduate degree at a conservatoire in September. It’s wonderful, and fairly alarming at the same time, as there are some things he will find very difficult (he’ll be fine with the music itself, but his language disorder means trouble with writing, emails and phonecalls … and approaching members of faculty or admin … and talking to people … those sorts of things. But yay music!!!!).

    Hope you are all well and that everybody is thriving! And that work is treating you well (rather than leaving you unexpectedly offline).

    many {{{hugs}}}
    opposablethumbs

    PS what’s lotik? ::puzzled::

  212. opposablethumbs says

    Nick Gotts, damn but I wish I still lived there! (or anywhere near :-((( )

  213. Sili says

    Nick Gotts,

    I’d love to, but the semester starts on the 13th, so my hands are tied.

  214. thunk: turmite city says

    Hello all!

    They changed it! Now it sucks!

    Welcome to the new loungers (Lurkeressa, Toska, 2kittehs), and I hope you have a nice experience here.

    I am preparing for a trip in the next two weeks, so I won’t be around much, if at all. Probably won’t be posting about it due to anonymity concerns.

  215. says

    Dammit. I forgot what I was going to say.
    ****
    Welcome all the new Horde members! I generally try to supply the *chocolate*
    Peas are evil unless they are sugar snap and I’ve pulled them off the vine.
    ****
    I’ve been officially cleared of the pneumonia. I need to remember to ask my doc about the vaccine, having it twice 12 years apart is too frequent for me.
    My doc also told me that I’m required to be in his office same day if I ever have similar symptoms (the sore throat etc.) again because

    “You can’t be trusted to have normal symptoms.”

  216. jefrir says

    rq

    re: Smash Up – sounds pretty good, though the recommended age starts at 12, and Middle Child is only 4. Is it simple enough to be understood by someone that age?

    Hmm, that may be a little young. I’d say a child of about 6-8 could probably grasp the basics well enough to play, especially if they’re used to games; using card combos in such a way as to develop a decent strategy may take longer, but the basics of piling up minions until they add up to a certain number is fairly staightforward. Boardgamegeek reckons on ages somewhere between 8 and 12 as a minimum.

  217. toska says

    Cait
    What languages do you speak, if you don’t mind me asking? Languages are my academic passion (I’ve only studied languages within the Indo-European family so far, but I’d like to branch out someday. We’ll see how that goes).

  218. blf says

    On my key-loving-lock problem…

    Thanks, cicely, for asking the locksmith about it. His(? her?) suggestion is it’s an internal alignment fault is one of the three things I “decided” on after a sleepless night — The other two being poor tolerances and the pins being impeded (or sticking).

    I did go to the big D.I.Y. shop this morning. They didn’t have any graphite lock lube (or tri-flow), but did have some “dry-film lube” which claims to be suitable for use on locks. Since the place is a real nuisance to get to without a car, I did get a can even though I have some doubts — my main concern at the moment is it says it “hardens after 30min at 20 degrees [C, obviously]”. I’m not sure if that is a bug, feature, or caution… I’ll be researching this stuff a bit more before trying it (and even then may do the same thing I did with the WD-40: Apply it to a (clean) key and wait…).

    I got a bit of a chuckle after researching the problem last night some on the Intertubes: Lots of arguing about whether or not WD-40 should be used, lots of suggestions to use a graphite lube (and some horror stories), and a surprising number of suggestions to use “pencil” lead. Like, WTF? Pencil lead is not pure graphite, it contains clay FFS ! Like WD-40, it might “work” at first, but is quite possibly going to cause bigger problems later…

    The argument against graphite lube is that, apparently — and presumably only(?) if you overdo it (over time) — the lock / cylinder jams due to being full of graphite. The cure? WD-40, apparently…

    It might be easier to forget about the locak and hire a cave troll with a BIG club (with a nail in it)…

  219. blf says

    Reasons to not be in Edinburgh:

    1st, It’s full of peas. Wearing kilts… I mean, they are embarrassing enough on a horse, but there are a few limits even the mildly deranged penguin would cross in an instant.

    2nd, It’s during (or near enough to) the festival and fringe. So beside the problem of getting a hotel room, restaurant table, spot at the pub’s bar, and space on on the footpath (sidewalk)…

    3rd, …you’ll be inundated by arty-farting twits who, if they have ever heard of logic, rationality, or science, consider them to be a failed joke and waste of ____fill in the blank____. (Admittedly, these people can be amusing to talk tobait, unlike politicians…)

  220. says

    WD-40 will cause a lock to seize if you spray it directly in. My boss did that once and we had to have a locksmith come out and replace the lock to the store.

    Re solid film lube, that is for moving parts when you are building something that won’t be able to be greased or oiled at a later time. It is usually spray application to a part, then cure in an oven. I used to audit people who applied it for shafts that would later be assembled into airplane parts. I would be cautious using it in a lock that isn’t in pieces.

  221. says

    Afterthought: if you put the SFL on the key, it will be permanently “slick” but won’t transfer any of that to the lock itself. But if it’s a key problem, that just might work.

  222. blf says

    This stuff is dry-film lube, not solid-film lube. It specially says it is for domestic use, does not mention disassembly or curing, and does mention being suitable for use on “locks”.

  223. blf says

    giggles…

    It’s a PTFE dry-film lube (in other words, similar to Teflon), applied as a CFC-free aerosol spray. Hence, the “hardening” that freaked me out is actually desirable

    This is what I was puzzled about. It was less-than-clear just what the stuff was, albeit the lack -of-mention of graphite and Teflon was a clew, as well as the deliberate pointing-out it contains no grease and is intended for use when grease should not be used (with “locks” being an explicitly-mentioned example use).

    Whilst the spare key does work better than my normal key, I am of the opinion (currently) the problem is with the lock: Sticky pins, out-of-alignment, or poor tolerances.

  224. says

    Welcome, new Loungers!

    Opinions from the HellGoddess, on issues of importance:

    Snow peas are good, snap peas are good, raw or lightly steamed. Wasabi peas will also be accepted when offered.

    Horses are beautiful observed from a safe distance, but big and scary up close. My Little Ponies are cute and may live in my studio.

    Cheese is… cheese? Where? Gimme! None of that processed pseudo-cheese plastic stuff, mind. I might be forced to bring out Mr Bolty, and we don’t want that, now do we?

    Miracle Whip is an abomination and should be shunned. Or catapulted into the nearest star for disposal.

    Chocolate should be dark, sometimes with sea salt.

    And now that you know the worst, I have a mug of tea waiting for me. Laters!

  225. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Nick Gotts,

    I’d love to, but I gave up after seeing hotel prices, and I’m going to still be on a business trip at the time anyway.

  226. HappyNat says

    Regular reader and some time commenter, just wanted to drop a plug for Jamie Kilstein and Citizen Radio. He is doing good stuff and the podcast is the right mix of progressive politics, outrage, and silliness for me. He has a couple shows in Phoenix and Cincinnati/Northern KY and he needs support to keep doing what he is doing. I’m driving down from Columbus for the Cincy show by myself Aug 23rd (my wife can’t make it) if any of you are in the area you should check it out or spread the word to any like minded progressives in the area.

    The Southgate House – Revival where he is playing is a cool locally owned place that is a converted church. Anyway I think supporting places and people like this is important so I wanted to get the word out.

    Peas are acceptable if with other food stuffs(like rice mentioned above), but a bowl of plain peas is one piece of sadness piled on other pieces of sadness.

    Miracle Whip is evil and anyone who says otherwise is a lizard person.

  227. Dhorvath, OM says

    blf,
    Tri-flow is for all intents and purposes a dry film lube. What you picked up is a good substitute based on your description.

  228. says

    Jenny Armintrout reviews that 50 Shades trailer: http://jennytrout.com/?p=7863#more-7863
    For those that don’t know, Jenny is a feminist atheist who has written a scathing, yet highly enjoyable chapter by chapter review of 50 Shades of Gray. I love reading her snarkiness as she shreds that book. She’s also done an episode by episode review of Buffy the Vampire Slayer through an intersectional lens (and boy she’s shattered some of my enjoyment of the show).

    In a great big F-U to that novel, she has written an erotic romance:

    Now, in a move that will be seen by some as me using the mention of Fifty Shades of Grey to market my own work in the sleaziest way possible (because it totally is and I just don’t give a fuck), if you have friends and family who love the 50SoG series, recommend my (free) erotic romance, The Boss to them. It’s written using tropes from 50, except for a lot of them I did the exact opposite of what E.L. did. Like, you know. Include informed consent and a hero who isn’t an abusive, manipulative monster. It’s available basically wherever e-books are sold, but here’s the amazon link. Some one-star reviews have called it, “nothing like 50 Shades,” which is basically the best advertisement I could hope for, but I’ve had fans of 50 say they loved it, too. So either way, you might get some entertainment from suggesting it.

    http://jennytrout.com/?p=7863#more-7863

  229. says

    http://www.movoto.com/blog/opinions/wealthiest-person-map/

    The interactive map shows the wealthiest person in each state in the USA.

    […] Of the wealthiest in each state, roughly half are founders of companies. Another major path to wealth is inheritance, with the Waltons being the most striking example.

    Wal-Mart founder Sam Walton blessed his family, making several members the wealthiest in their states:

    Jim Walton in Arkansas
    Alice Walton in Texas
    Christy Walton in Wyoming […]

    No matter the source of wealth, or home state, there’s no denying the extreme gap between the mega wealthy and the average American.

    Our final visual presents an interactive map which helps to illuminate the huge dichotomy between the mega-wealthy and the average wealth of regions around the country.

  230. rq says

    Tony
    I believe The Boss spawned two sequels. I’ve only read the first book so far, though. *wiggles eyebrows*

  231. opposablethumbs says

    I definitely like the idea of The Boss, and I did start reading it – it’s very well done, imo – but I drifted away after the first few chapters (m/f isn’t really my cup of tea). But I might give it another go. And I love the idea of taking the appalling clusterfuck of dysfunction and abuse that is FSoG and doing it right.

    rq, did you happen to see my post upthread from here a bit, at #278?

  232. says

    Let’s add this to our collection of rightwing religious dunderheads being exceptionally awful.

    Conservative activist and potential GOP presidential candidate Ben Carson joined James Dobson on Family Talk Radio yesterday, where the two got to talking about LGBT-affirming pastors.

    Dobson, joining a long line of anti-LGBT activists who don’t quite understand what bisexuality is, asked what pastors who endorse marriage equality are going to do about bisexual people, who he said “have sex with males and females at the same time.”

    “That’s called orgies, that’s what it used to be called” he said.

    Carson, for his part, despaired that pastors who approve of same-sex marriage have given a “finger-in-your-eye to God.” […]

    http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/ben-carson-lgbt-affirming-pastors-put-their-finger-eye-god

  233. says

    More rightwing, religious dunderheadedness … also, paranoia.

    End Times radio host Rick Wiles issued a dire warning on his program Wednesday, claiming that “the persecution against Christians in America has started” and will soon “worsen” to the extent that “any man or woman who dares to stand up against this tyranny is in danger of being smeared, arrested or possibly killed.”

    He added that the government might soon “set up” Christian conservatives by hacking into their computers and planting false evidence of crimes. […]

    http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/rick-wiles-christians-america-will-soon-be-arrested-or-possibly-killed

    The universe in which these people live is very strange.

  234. says

    That last @302, Lynna, is an interestingly specific statement.

    “They’ll be breaking into computers and planting false evidence of crimes.”

    Pool on how long before this fellow is charged with something found on his computer?

  235. says

    Here are some additional details about the methane-spewing craters we looked at in the previous chapter of the Lounge:

    […] Andrei Plekhanov, an archaeologist at the Scientific Centre of Arctic Studies in Salekhard, Russia, who led an expedition to the crater, told The Journal Nature that air normally contains just 0.000179 percent methane.

    According to Plekhanov, the last two summers in the Yamal have been exceptionally warm at about nine degrees Fahrenheit above average. Rising temperatures could have allowed the permafrost to thaw and collapse, releasing the methane previously trapped by the subterranean ice. Methane is the primary component of natural gas. The original crater is about 20 miles from a large natural gas plant and the entire Yamal Peninsula is rich in natural gas that is being extensively tapped to help fuel Russia’s natural gas boom.

    Hans-Wolfgang Hubberten, a geochemist at the Alfred Wegener Institute in Potsdam, Germany, told Nature that climate change and the slow, steady thaw of the region could be to blame.

    “Gas pressure increased until it was high enough to push away the overlying layers in a powerful injection, forming the crater,” he said. […]

  236. says

    It’s summertime, let’s take a lovely dip in some body of water … or not.

    Some vacationers have been getting more than they bargained for during visits to the beach and pools this summer. Vibrio vulnificus – a warm water-dwelling, flesh eating bacteria – has infected more than a dozen people this year, some of whom have succumbed. Recent cases in Florida and the D.C. metropolitan area – including one where a Stafford, Va. man was admitted to a hospital after a swim in the Potomac River – have brought attention to an increase in seawater temperatures that experts say make the bodies of water the perfect breeding ground for deadly bacteria. […]

    Think Progress link.

  237. Pteryxx says

    Water warning for Toronto due to a toxin from algae, boiling NOT recommended:

    Toledo tells 400,000 residents: don’t drink the water

    The city advised residents not to brush their teeth with or boil the water because that would only increase the toxin’s concentration. Showers and baths are fine, the mayor said.

    Toledo issued the warning just after midnight after tests at one treatment plant showed two sample readings for microsystin above the standard for consumption.

  238. says

    New York Police Department officers are having a rough week. First they killed a guy by putting him in a chokehold, and then they caused a nearly naked woman to pass out. They left the woman lying on the floor uncovered for more than two minutes while they milled around. They also allegedly pepper sprayed a child.

    A Brooklyn woman answered the door in a towel, only to be dragged into the hallway by a dozen male police officers, a video obtained by NY1 shows.

    The video shows 48-year-old Denise Stewart struggling to get away from the cops, yelling, “I can’t breathe” as they hold her against the wall. Stewart, who has severe asthma, passed out and dropped to the floor wearing nothing but underwear. Officers stood around, not bothering to cover her up, for about two minutes.

    Officers say they received a call to the apartment building without a specific apartment number and heard noise coming from Stewart’s apartment. Stewart’s lawyer told the New York Daily News the 911 call came from an apartment on a different floor.

    Stewart’s family was also arrested, and they claim her four-year-old grandson was even pepper-sprayed. The NYPD says Stewart’s 12-year-old daughter had bruises on her face and told police her mother and sister beat her with a belt, but other sources told NY1 the Administration for Children’s Services found no evidence that this was true and returned her to her mother. […]

    http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2014/08/02/3467044/nypd-naked-woman/

  239. says

    Let’s take a closer look at the U.S. Congress’s August vacation. It is mandated by a law that Congress passed. Hmmm.

    Congress managed to adjourn on Friday night, sending all members home for a legislatively required recess for the entire month of August after becoming a close contender for the least productive Congress ever, with lots of unfinished business on the table.

    The Legislative Reorganization Act of 1970 requires that the House and Senate take a break “not later than July 31 of each year,” or in an odd-numbered year “that Friday in August which occurs at least thirty days before the first Monday in September (Labor Day) of such year to the second day after Labor Day.” Congress can stay if the country is in a state of war, but that hasn’t happened since 1941. The law was passed after Congressional sessions had stretched so long that in 1963, the session began in January and ended in December with just a three-day weekend as a break in the whole time.

    […] they also get another break in December and often get nearly 250 days off from work in the nation’s capitol each year.

    The American worker, on the other hand, could very well get no days off from work in a year. We are the only advanced country in the world that doesn’t guarantee that workers get some paid vacation time. There is no law, as there is for Congress, making sure they can take a break. The European Union, on the other hand, requires 20 paid vacation days, and many countries go further, such as the mandated 30 days in France, 28 in the United Kingdom, and 25 in Austria, Denmark, Finland, Norway, and Sweden. Even our northerly neighbors Canada require 10. […]

    http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2014/08/02/3467032/congress-august-vacation/

  240. rq says

    opposablethumbs
    Yes, sorry, I did! Thank you!
    I was speed-skimming before starting work and wanted to reply by email (hotmail can’t be accessed at work). :)

  241. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    I turned the tv on, CNN again. Why am I doing this to myself?

  242. rq says

    Beatrice
    The same reason why I feel it necessary to read articles on topics I know will make me frustrated, angry and cry?
    *hugs*

    opposablethumbs
    Pardon me if I should have noticed, but is that a new gravatar?

  243. David Marjanović says

    A long string of petitions! When you sign one, you’re shown the next.

    is no-one (I mean, no Pharyngulites other than me”) going to be in Edinburgh 13-14 August???

    I’ll be there 4-7 August or so. On Tuesday, if all goes well (both curators are on holidays right now), I’ll gaze at a particularly important fossil in the National Museum of Scotland…

  244. Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Upon reviewing Kate or Die, I must say:

    Lady: Lamps aren’t real! Tacos are imaginary!

    Taco: Fuck you, Lady.

    Taco: I’m a taco! I’m the best taco.

  245. opposablethumbs says

    nope, it’s the same Precambrian rabbit gravatar I’ve been using – maybe the site re-vamp has improved display quality for some readers, making it look different???

  246. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    When dad didn’t have a mobile: worrying whether something happened and we don’t know, but ultimately deciding that we can only hope everything is ok and wait.
    Now that he has a phone: he doesn’t call when he promised or doesn’t answer our calls and we’re ready to call ambulance, police and go into full-blown panic mode.

  247. says

    I had no idea you could substitute cornmeal for grits until I decided to Google it earlier. Despite going grocery shopping (thanks to everyone who was able to donate money–it was very much appreciated), I forgot to buy grits, which I like to have with eggs in the morning. But cornmeal works quite nicely. Of course I prepared too much, so I have a lot leftover, but I’ll just use it for dinner tonight.

  248. rq says

    So finally someone from work bothered to let me know that the internal network is actually down due to a server problem. Thanks, y’all. Woulda had a much less stressful weekend knowing that ahead of time (like a note on my desk on Friday, ya know?).
    *tplrplrplrplrplr*

  249. rq says

    Oh and opposablethumbs
    I think what Tony said: I seem to be seeing people’s gravatars a lot more clearly/brightly with the new lay-out / colour scheme. Yours is really cool. :)

  250. rq says

    And wow, that science education picture with the snake he has at the bottom resembles a lot one of my pencil sketches from years ago (that is, the snake threatening to bite the apple – I suppose it’s a pretty classic image, and mine was a lot more vicious, but it’s just a bit uncanny to realize that you’ve been thinking something a better artist has been thinking, in some vague, near-parallel kind of way).

  251. says

    One funny thing about the gravatars, rq’s doesn’t show up in my email updates, while gworrolls’ gravatar does. In the Lounge, it’s opposite. I see rq’s, but not gworroll’s.

  252. says

    Good point, David M. @317. So how does the USA get away with that breach of human rights?

    In other news, Donald Trump is foaming at the mouth:

    […] Donald Trump let loose on Twitter with a series of doomsday predictions following news that a pair of Americans who had contracted the Ebola virus would be brought to the U.S. for treatment.

    Trump began his rant Thursday night and quickly ratcheted up the rhetoric, including condemning the two aid workers who contracted the virus while treating Ebola patients in Africa.

    “People that go to far away places to help out are great,” Trump wrote in one tweet, “but must suffer the consequences!” […]

    “Ebola patient will be brought to the U.S. in a few days – now I know for sure that our leaders are incompetent. KEEP THEM OUT OF HERE!”

    “Stop the EBOLA patients from the entering the U.S. Treat them, at the highest level, over there. THE UNITED STATES HAS ENOUGH PROBLEMS!”

    “To all the liberal do gooders, this is the Plague you idiots! No cure! You may have confidence in the CDC, but I don’t!” […]

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/donald-trump-ebola-rant

  253. rq says

    Fuck this sticky-heat. I came home and took my pants off because I can’t take it anymore. And tomorrow is supposed to be even worse. Can we turn it down a notch, please?

  254. says

    So how does the USA get away with that breach of human rights?

    Same way it gets away with all the other endless treaty violations: The U.S. government ignores their existence, and no one has the power to make them meet their obligations.

  255. says

    I guess mormon leaders don’t really believe in the protections provided by the sacred undergarmies after all. Nor do they believe that god is looking out for mormon missionaries.

    The LDS Church is pulling its missionaries out of Sierra Leone and Liberia as a precaution against the deadly Ebola virus, which has already killed hundreds of people in West Africa.

    Missionaries for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in those countries are being “reassigned to other missions,” the Utah-based faith said in a news release Friday.

    “In recent weeks measures have been taken to reduce risk to missionaries, including asking them to remain in their apartments,” the release said. […]

    http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/58251904-78/missionaries-liberia-release-sierra.html.csp

  256. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    “To all the liberal do gooders, this is the Plague you idiots! No cure! You may have confidence in the CDC, but I don’t!” […]

    How about Emory University, where the first Ebola patient was transfered today?

  257. rq says

    Lynna @334
    How? Do they say those things? How? Seriously? As christians? As humans? How? The depths… They are incomprehensible. Like… How?

  258. rq says

    Protecting your own children doesn’t mean destroying everyone else’s children. How difficult is that to understand?

  259. carlie says

    Anyone here familiar with getting manicures?

    I haven’t gotten one professionally since my wedding, 20 years ago. I have one scheduled for a friend and myself in 4 days, but I have two minor wounds – one is on a cuticle, the kind where it overgrows and rips a little, and the other is a small hangnail-related injury. Each is a few days old. If they’re not entirely healed, I assume that means I shouldn’t get it done at all? I’ve been reading horror stories about sanitation and infections, and I’m not sure how paranoid I should be. Is it an acceptable thing to do to go in on Monday and have them check it out and see if I should cancel for Wednesday? (It’s now or never, no rescheduling possible) I’ll be sad if I can’t get it done, but I’ll be more sad if I show up there on Wednesday and have them say no, I can’t get it done, but still have to pay for it because then it’s a last-minute cancellation.

  260. says

    rq @335, There is no reasonable explanation. I fall back on dunderheadedness mixed with cowardice. Effing Donald Trump anyway.

    In other news, I see indications that Pharyngulites who attend music festivals this summer should be extra super cautious about the drugs available.

    A 20-year-old North Carolina man died and 20 others were hospitalized after a rash of apparent drug overdoses at an electronic music concert in Maryland on Friday night, police said. […]

    Twenty concert-goers were hospitalized during and after the event, police said. […]

  261. says

    Thanks, Loungers – just got hold of her husband, and he says they’re fine (they being her and her third partner), and that they’re out again tonight at some kink party. So whew.

    My partner’s a big ol’ Deadhead for 25 years or so now, so I hear that trippers got sick at a festival she’s at…well, reason to worry. I hope the others turn out to be alright.

  262. rq says

    You know, just once, I’d love to see the leading lady fall in love with the black gladiator-slave, instead of the plucky white boy. It would be so much more believable. (Yes, I’m watching Pompeii, sexy rips in the dress and all. :P)

  263. rq says

    (I also love how they’re all breathing ash-laden air with no apparent difficulty. And there’s one super-convenient clear road in the entire city, just right for that four-horse chariot.)

  264. cicely says

    MKDKitty:

    Miracle Whip. The only miracle there is that people actually eat it.

    With relish!
    (Also, a little mustard, and sometimes boiled egg, and tuna.
    And pecans. Pecans make everything better.)

    jefrir:

    And… I have a new job!

    Congratulations!
    Income is good.

    Hi, 2kittehs; Welcome In/Back!
    :)

    me: D&D 5e
    Azkyroth …already?

    Yuppers.
    The guy doing the DMing chores got the demo/intro package, containing pre-genned characters and mini-module, and enough info to get by on; also, there are Places on the Web where someone with inside access talks about it, comparing and contrasting with previous editions. Here, for instance.

    Dalillama:

    This is one reason I quit buying D&D products back during the splatbook explosion right before TSR went under. Ever since WotC bought the title Marketing has been calling the shots, and it shows. If I wanted to play goddamned World of Warcraft, I’d be doing so.

    I suspect that this is why the “sneak-peek”; they’re hoping that some of us disgusted oldsters (still using the entirely-functional 1st ed books, with house rules to smooth the edges) will be lured back into the herd fold. It distresses them that we are not giving them our moneys.
    They wants our moneys.

    Miracle Whip is milk drawn from the bilious teats of Shub-Niggurath.

    And udderly deeeee-lishious!
    :D

    opposablethumbs:

    huge conga rats to jefrir, that sounds wonderful! My idea of a perfect job, really, surrounded by books and journals and no customers

    When I took the ACT test, ‘way back before the K-T Boundary (or whatever Kids These Days are calling it, now), the back side of the results page had a “World of Work” graph-like thingy, designed to give the victim student an idea of what sort of occupations their tested aptitudes suggested would be good “fits”.
    Mine suggested that I should be kept in a locked room, nevernevernever allowed to interact with Human Beings, while books and such (and at least a minimum of food and drink) were periodically fed through the slot in the door.
    I’m much more social, now—but then again that bar was so low as to be indistinguishable from one laying directly on the ground.

    thunk: Have a safe (and enjoyable) trip.

    Rawnaeris:

    I’ve been officially cleared of the pneumonia.

    Huzzah!
    (Originally, I read that as “I’ve been officially cleared for the pneumonia”—I’d had no idea that Clearance was Required!)

    blf: The cave troll would probably be cheaper, at least for the initial investment, but I suspect that the maintenance costs would really start piling up fast; plus, you’d have to worry about inadvertently attracting Adventurer Parties, for which “collateral damage*” are their first and middle names.
    On the other hand, you’d never have to be concerned for the safety of your personal property ever again.
     
     
    * Or possibly, “indiscriminate spell-use”.

    Imitation Cheese Food is an Abomination Unto Nuggen.
    Its hypothetical bastard offspring, the Genuine Imitation Cheese Food Spread, is the Dark Hole of Wrong around which all other Wrongness orbits, and which, of course, sucks infinitely.

    HappyNat, Welcome In, if I’ve missed you before.
    :)

    Miracle Whip is evil and anyone who says otherwise is a lizard person.

    *pause*
    Well, that’s the scaly skin patches explained, anyways.
    I was suspecting, maybe, a bit a psoriasis coming on.
    :D

    Tony!:

    For those that don’t know, Jenny is a feminist atheist who has written a scathing, yet highly enjoyable chapter by chapter review of 50 Shades of Gray. I love reading her snarkiness as she shreds that book. She’s also done an episode by episode review of Buffy the Vampire Slayer through an intersectional lens (and boy she’s shattered some of my enjoyment of the show).

    Yeah. I hadn’t realized how much of a Nice Guy Zander is.

    319

  265. David Marjanović says

    Yessssss! I’ve finally, finally submitted my grant proposal. Some say that agency takes 3 to 6 months till it reaches a decision, others say 6 to 9, yet others up to 10, but in the meantime I’m safe and stable – and can finally go back to doing research and publishing papers instead of explaining what research I’d like to do at some point in the future, why it’s at all interesting, and how much all the traveling might cost (that’s right, I had to guesstimate the costs of transport, lodging and even food for all project-related trips that I’d like to do in the three-year period I’m applying for).

    I have three manuscripts that are mostly finished. I had to interrupt working on them for months. Expect a flurry of publications (at least “online early”) before the year is over!

    And the heavy rain has stopped, too; I can go home. :-) It’s 1:48 am.

    I came home and took my pants off because I can’t take it anymore.

    I do that whenever it’s warm enough. And when it’s not, I change into comfortable jogging pants. Pants are oppression, says the sage.

    just got hold of her husband, and he says they’re fine (they being her and her third partner), and that they’re out again tonight at some kink party. So whew.

    *whew*

  266. says

    This is distressing. An article by Steven Wright in The New York Review of Books makes a point about the Supreme court hobbling the 1965 Voting Rights Act in that 2013 decision. So, worse than I thought.

    In 2013, the Supreme Court hobbled the 1965 Voting Rights Act, which for decades had provided safeguards to prevent unfair voting practices, including special oversight for jurisdictions with a history of voter discrimination. In Shelby County v. Holder, the Court found that Congress created a flawed formula to select those special jurisdictions. Last week, the Justice Department revealed that, in light of the Supreme Court decision, it has concluded that the Attorney General no longer retains the statutory authority to send observers to those jurisdictions. […]

    In 2012 about 780 Justice Department personnel fanned out across the country to oversee elections. This is how the USA first dismantled Jim Crow electoral practices about 50 years ago. And now we will no longer have oversight, we will have no federal observers in jurisdictions with a history of voter discrimination? This is very bad news indeed.

    Until now, federal observers monitored polls in states and jurisdictions covered by the Voting Rights Act and also in other jurisdictions that consented to be monitored. Now, absent a court order, the Attorney General must request and receive permission to monitor polls in any jurisdiction. It’s hard to imagine North Carolina or Texas giving the federal government front seats to the consequences of their voter identification policies. […]

    http://www.nybooks.com/blogs/nyrblog/2014/jul/29/voter-discrimination-just-got-easier/

  267. says

    Well, I feel silly.

    I figured out why I can make some pages on Pharyngula change sizes by tapping them, but not others – the ones that were enlarging were the ones wherein I’d played with the browser settings. “Request desktop site” box checked, tapping works. Box not checked, tapping doesn’t work.

    Unfortunately, this means that (a) I have to check every single page/thread individually, and (b) I can’t remember what I’m doing from one day to the next. And that’s on a good day – sometimes I can’t remember why I walked across the room. I need a memory upgrade, this brain has no more room for data.

  268. rq says

    Throwing this in for Team Rational Logic (or was that Logical Rationality?): it’s been going around on my FB with a lot of people liking it, but it’s really been sticking in my gullet… so to speak. 7 Things Before Picking Sides – can’t really pinpoint what it is that unsettles so, but I think it’s the reduction of so many lives and so much death into a back-and-forth scorecard that can somehow be rated and evaluated.
    Anyway.
    It’s almost 3AM and I promised myself I’d be in to work good and early tomorrow.
    Maybe I should just go. :P

    Good night, all!

  269. toska says

    Tony!
    Thanks for that jennytrout link. I started the Buffy review series, and I can’t wait to really get into it. I’ve really enjoyed that series, but I’ve always recognized that *it’s not as feminist as everyone thinks it is* vibe. The part that stands out to me as most egregious is when Buffy and Riley break up, and Buffy and all of her friends blame the whole thing on her and her lack of effort to adequately stroke his male ego and make sure he still feels like a manly man despite his super strong girlfriend. I’m looking forward to digging in to some of the other problematic issues as well. I’ve found every show I really like still has some problematic moments in terms of social justice issues, but I’m practicing on letting myself acknowledge those problems and still enjoy myself.

  270. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    blf

    Rawnaeris, Lulu Cthulhu says:

    Afterthought: if you put the SFL on the key, it will be permanently “slick” but won’t transfer any of that to the lock itself.

    That’s not entirely true. If your stuff is anything like Tri-Flow it can wick itself upwards through capillary action. I use the TF all the time and have seen the external puddle disappear as it sucks it’s way in between close fitting parts. I obviously can’t say for sure if it will work in your lock, but there is a plausible mechanism by which it could.

  271. 2kittehs says

    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk- @275

    Well, yes, but it’s machine embroidery. I don’t want to claim that it’s nothing, but it’s not as amzing as people think when they have hand embroidery in mind.

    I never got to grips with using a sewing machine at all, though I used to do a lot of very small hand-sewing, so that makes it every bit as skilled and special in my book.

  272. A. Noyd says

    Joseph Fink (creator of the Welcome to Night Vale podcast) was talking on Twitter the other day about (among other things) Sherlock writer Steven Moffat’s ability to write female characters and said, “I think like Joss Whedon he often mistakes ‘empowered’ for ‘strong in exactly the way I personally want to sleep with’.”

  273. cicely says

    DMFM:

    Yessssss! I’ve finally, finally submitted my grant proposal.
    Huzzah!
    *short, sharp shower of bonbons*

    rq:

    You’re pretty amazing (even for a lizard person) […]

    It’s the way the moonlight gleams on my scales, isn’t it?
    (We Creatures of the Night try to avoid getting sunlight on our scales.
    It makes them all icky; and then they tend to crack and peel and spontaneously combust.)
    -

  274. rq says

    It’s almost 8.30AM. I don’t even want to know how hot it’s going to get, because it’s already sticky and gross.

  275. rq says

    chigau
    It is 24°C downstairs in the kitchen.
    There is also no air conditioning at work, except in the PCR- and analyzer-equipment room, but there’s no deskspace in there. For once, I’m glad our windows open up to a very narrow alley with a view to the neighbouring building wall and very little sunlight.

  276. chigau (違う) says

    rq
    We have no airconditioner, we have an electric fan.
    kitteh is conflicted; likes the cooling, hates the wind

  277. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Why do people put air conditioner on 17-19°C? That’s bloody cold when I’m dressed for summer. And I don’t appreciate working all day in spring temperatures only to go out into 35°C.
    That can’t be healthy.

  278. 2kittehs says

    @Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought

    17-19? That’s “time to put the warm jumper on” indoors. Brrr. Yeah, going out into blazing hot (damn I am not looking forward to summer) weather after that is no fun at all.

    Melbourne just had its coldest day in years – 1.4C at 7.30 am. I slept through it and for several hours afterward, one of the bonuses of being unemployed.

  279. rq says

    Beatrice
    I don’t need 17 – 19 air conditioning, but I would settle for something around 21 with a lot less humidity.

    chigau
    The fan at home isn’t actually creating a cooling wind right now. :( And there’s no fan at work.

  280. rq says

    2kittehs
    That’s cold (for Australia!). My cousin in Canberra said it was -6 the other day. :/
    I’m pretty sure this kind of weather will be used to deny the general warming trend of the climate.

  281. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    2kittehs,
    I spent the bus ride yesterday with my sweater on, freezing my legs off, because AC in the bus was set on 21.

    rq,
    Yes, humidity makes the high temperatures much worse.

  282. rq says

    Speaking of air conditioning, last week the early evening tempterature was around 34, so Husband set the car air conditioning to 24 or 25.
    On the way home, the air temperature was around 23 (still felt hot), and I spent most of the trip home wondering why the car wasn’t actually any cooler than outside… (I figured it out eventually.)

  283. 2kittehs says

    rq: Yes, that’s very cold for us. Canberra usually gets sharper winters than we do in Melbourne, I think, but -6, yow!

    There was a blanket of snow at Lorne yesterday. Lorne’s a seaside town on the Great Ocean Road!

    The weather bureau is already warning that we’re likely to have a longer, drier summer than usual this year. “Usual” must be a fairly lengthy time, because summers have been longer and hotter for years now. Blips, variations, I know – I’m gearing up for reminding the Climate Change Don’t Real types if they dare bring this lovely cold winter up while we’re sweltering or hearing about the next lot of bushfires.

    Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought: gakk, that sounds like too many train trips I’ve taken. Though if it came to the choice I’d take that over the times when the air con doesn’t seem to be turned on at all, or not working. Metal box, no openable windows, stuffed full of people – ah, the joys of commuting in summer.

    I’m with you on the humidity. Only good thing about it is it makes my hair curlier.

  284. rq says

    2kittehs

    Climate Change Don’t Real

    Don’t know if that’s an offering to Tpyos or not, but I love that phrasing.
    And I’m definitely on the better-cold-than-sweaty bit of commuting in the summer. It’s not so bad at certain hours, when transit (trains, streetcars, etc.) are relatively empty, but rush hour… *squick*
    I don’t think I have anything to say about excessive humidity (though excessive dryness is its own problem).

  285. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    That gets a bit disgusting, yes.
    Not to mention the feeling of weakness and inability to breathe that excessive heat brings, and extra troubles if you have heart issues.

    So I’m never happy with anything, don’t look at me like that :)

  286. rq says

    Ugh, I handle heat crappily, too (but no heart issues that I know of). Best Friend back in Canada loves it, tropical heat, humidity and all, but it just makes me feel like a slowly melting piece of cheesy slug.
    Or something.

  287. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    -36c and I’m out for a ride on my bike.*. +36c and I’m laying in a pool of my own sweat, begging Ms. Fishy to bring me something cold to drink.

    Why, exactly, am I living in Australia?

    Right this second (thank you Oregon Scientific home weather station) it’s 0.4 out the front door and -0.7 out the back** here in alpine Victoria. And despite my protestations above I’ve adapted enough to the climate here that I’m finding it cold. Hell, I used to continue to wear shorts down to minus three. These days at that temp I’m not only in long pants, but I’m putting on an extra torso layer as well.

    I fear it’s come so far that I will no longer be able to visit Canada. As I exit the aircraft the wolves will sense my weakness and cull me instantly.***

    *Actually, I rode to work. I did have a choice, but standing around for a bus in that temperature is colder still.
    ** The two units are 0.2c out, the rest is due to the front unit being right against the house near a window. In the time it took to write this it dropped 0.1 on both readings.
    ***Yes, I have made that joke before. And I will continue to until the visual no longer amuses me. :p

  288. Esteleth, [an error occurred while processing this directive] says

    I went to see Guardians of the Galaxy yesterday.

    Going in, I was promised a screwball take on 1970s sci-fi B-movie schlock.

    They delivered the hell out of that promise.

    They’re all heroes, just like Kevin Bacon.

  289. Rob Grigjanis says

    FossilFishy @379:

    Hell, I used to continue to wear shorts down to minus three.

    Yeah, oh to be young again. I used to run in shorts down to about -5C, unless there was a strong wind as well.

    As for heat; moving to Toronto from beautiful damp Northern England was a shock to the system. It took me years to discover my own ideal way of dealing with it; wait until the hottest part of the day, then go for a run. I don’t understand the science of it, but it increased my tolerance to heat/humidity to the point that it never bothered me much again. Certainly not recommended for everyone.

    BTW, it’s not the wolves that are the problem, but the hybrid coywolves. They hang around bus stops and pick off the huddlers. A small price to pay for socialized medicine.

  290. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Esteleth,

    Thanks for sharing that. I was looking forward to the movie, but wasn’t sure whether to expect a disaster instead.
    Going to the cinema for that movie is on top of my list of things to do when I get home.

  291. blf says

    Hum… Only 28-ish or so here, currently, with a bit of a breeze. We’ll been having Mistral-like winds the last few days, which made things feel a bit cooler, and then thunderstorms last night,

    On the other hand, this is Août, which means all of France is here on vacation, and the only way to make it though the streets — sans mildly deranged penguin leading the charge — is to spread rumors of a shortage of garlic, frogs, and snails, and of Germans on the beach.

  292. says

    When I got up at 5:15AM to feed the cats, the backyard thermometer read 73°F, with 88%rh and intermittent light rain. That was our low for the night.

    I think the weather wizards are predicting Santa Ana winds later this week. Southern California. If you don’t like the weather, wait a bit, it’ll change.

  293. rq says

    Rob
    Wait, socialized medicine spawned coywolves as a side-effect?

    When I was young(er), I didn’t wear hats right down to -20 or so, no problem. Things have changed.

    blf
    Speaking of wolves, I always prounounce Aout as “Ah-ooooooo” in my head, complete with wolfish head throw.

    +++

    *sigh* Next train in an hour. They could manage to run a decent schedule on the days that I’m working, at least.
    Then again, it’s +32 outside and I’ll take the extra shady time.

  294. rq says

    Dhorvath
    Come visit me in January (or whenever the -30s and windchills are going to hit this year), pack only shorts. :)
    Call it an experiment; we’ll discuss results in the field.

  295. Rob Grigjanis says

    rq @385:

    Wait, socialized medicine spawned coywolves as a side-effect?

    I think it was the other way around, to ensure healthy prey. The lupine lobby groups are almost as powerful as the reptilian (aka Big Business). All I know is that if you want to get to work in the winter, you should engage in stotting while waiting for a bus.

  296. opposablethumbs says

    All I know is that if you want to get to work in the winter, you should engage in stotting while waiting for a bus.

    i.e. if a coywolf – or even a brazen one – should go for you, you stot its heid in. You may, if you wish, give them fair warning by painting yourself blue, wearing a t-shirt in the middle of winter, waving cans of Tartan Special around and yelling “c’mere ye wee radge bastard an’ I’ll stot yer heid in”. This should work.

  297. HappyNat says

    cicely @351

    I bounce in a out depending on time. Thank you for confirming my hypothesis on th Miracle Whip – Lizard Person connection. To the Press!

  298. says

    Wait, people who are not sitcom characters actually wear pants at home?

    *hugses all around*

    Some media whining…
    Now, #1 got some DvDs for her birthday, so we’Re basically catching up with whatever Disney did in the last 10 years.

    First: Tangled
    Now, this is not Disney’s fault, but hell did I get triggered. Basically, I’ve been raised by the wicked witch. Minus the magic hair and the locked up tower. Then I thought that whoever wrote that character must have known somebody like that, too.
    Plus: I liked how Rapunzel was not the Damsel in Distress and how they in the end were both willing to sacrifice themselves for the other one.
    Problematic: Fuck is everybody white again. Except for the wicked witch who has a standard gypsie look to her. Really, haven’t we moved beyond “gypsies steal babies” trope by now?

    Second: Up
    I was totally enchanted with the start. Carl and Ellie, being kick-ass together, being such a normal couple, though I needed to do lots of talking and explaining because some things are not easily understood, like why are they sad when the doctor talks to them, and what that bottle with coins means, and why Ellie dies.
    And at that point women disappear from the movie. Apart from a gigantic bird called “Kevin” who also needs to be rescued.
    On the plus side, the kid is not white

  299. says

    Watch Alison Grimes give a barn burner of a speech that shreds Mitch McConnell. She hits the women’s rights issues well.

    Daily Kos link.

    At the Fancy Farm picnic, Democratic Senate candidate Alison Grimes lit up Mitch McConnell, and ripped the heart of out his campaign with a blistering speech that made Sen. McConnell’s remarks look stale and out of date.
    ……………
    After Alison Grimes finished with Mitch McConnell today, all that was left were the tattered Republican talking points from decades past. Mitch McConnell is on the ropes, and his dubious performance today makes one wonder if any amount of ad spending will be able to save him.

    Politicus USA link.

  300. rq says

    Rob
    Stotting, eh? Well, I don’t have such a cute fluffy tail, so I doubt the coywolves would be fooled. :( And anyway, 1) no coywolves in Latvia and 2) in winter, WE cull the WOLVES, so THERE!!!

  301. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Well, shit. A mosquito in the room.
    5 bites and counting…. that’s just on my feet.

  302. Rob Grigjanis says

    rq

    A story from my dad about his youth in deepest darkest Zemgale. He was riding with his dad in their sleigh through winter woods, when all of a sudden their horse came to a dead stop. Grandad just said “wolves”. Smart old horse.

    Are there still wolves in the wild there?

  303. rq says

    Rob
    Yes, there are. Not sure how many, but the wolf hunting season opens in December for a couple of weeks every year has already begun for the season, so apparently enough to be culled (Husband’s relatives in Latgale tend to go in December/January, which is why that came to mind at first – they’re registered hunters as well as forest rangers themselves). The quota is set each year using information from hunters, landowners and forest rangers – last year, is was 300 (actual number killed – 292), this year it’s 250. Link in Latvian. Note reference to the wolf being a protected species in Europe, but populous enough locally to require population control.

  304. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Tricky thing when looking for restaurant suggestions on trip advisor: wwhat are “great prices” and “cheap food” for someone from UK are not necessarily the same for me.
    At least I can compare to local forums to get the most from both.

    Four days in and I’m already sick of pastries and yoghurt. But it’s so expensive to eat in restaurants every day, and I’d like to save some money from the daily allowance*. /whine

    * is there a specific word in English for this – the daily allowance you get from your employer when on a business trip?

  305. blf says

    A mosquito in the room.
    5 bites and counting…. that’s just on my fee

    Why don’t you try biting the mosquito instead?

  306. rq says

    Tony
    Do you get extra off if other people pray for/with you? Because I could totally get on that, if you need it. :)

    blf
    Uh-uh, you don’t want to go biting those little nuclear-powered genetically-modified flying vampires. *shudder* It’ll turn you into a pod of peas.
    Or something worse…

  307. blf says

    Finding the little fucker is the problem. By the time you realize you’ve been bitten it has flown away.

    Well, Ok, it is easier to find yer feet, but I don’t see the point to then biting them, mosquito or no mosquito. And what do you do if there are two mosquitoes? Bite yer ears as well?

    I’m actually rather amazed you can bend over / twist about sufficiently to put own teeths into own feets (obviously assuming you are not using special tools, removable teeth, or removable feet).

  308. blf says

    They must have rather interesting mosquitoes in Latvia.

    ‘Though I suppose a diet of potatoe-flavoured people would drive any bug bug mad…

  309. rq says

    blf
    What, yours aren’t a minimum 10 centimeter wingspan?
    I’ll have to write a letter to parliament about those potatoes…

  310. blf says

    What, yours aren’t a minimum 10 centimeter wingspan?
    I’ll have to write a letter to parliament about those potatoes…

    Yer basic Latvian potatoe has wings!?

    What do the fancy models have, prehensile eye-stalks?

  311. rq says

    blf
    NO, the mosquito has the wings. The potatoes have a full, 10-jointed set of prehensile tentacles, and radar eyes on stalks (also see in infrared and shoot lasers).
    No wings yet, though.

  312. chigau (違う) says

    HELP ME!
    I have a large bottle of 29% hydrogen peroxide.
    I want to make 125ml of 5% hydrogen peroxide.
    Math is hard!!!

  313. opposablethumbs says

    If you were to mix 21.55ml of the 29% with 103.45ml of water, would that give you 125ml of 5% ??????????????

  314. opposablethumbs says

    Oops! I promise I didn’t peek. But I am incredibly impressed, amazed and flabbergasted to see that I appear to have stumbled on the right answer. How the hell did that happen …. ::passes out::

  315. says

    CaitieCat @303

    That last @302, Lynna, is an interestingly specific statement.
    “They’ll be breaking into computers and planting false evidence of crimes.”
    Pool on how long before this fellow is charged with something found on his computer?

    My thoughts exactly. That fundamentalist christian is hiding something on his computer.

  316. chigau (違う) says

    opposablethumbs
    When you regain consciousness…
    Congratulations!
    I can do the math, it’s simple algebra.
    What my brain doesn’t grok is why C1 x V1 = C2 x V2.
    (I didn’t get it in high school, either.)

  317. Rob Grigjanis says

    chigau @418: Because concentration is essentially (amount of stuff)/volume. Multiplying by volume cancels the 1/volume, always giving the same number.

  318. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    What my brain doesn’t grok is why C1 x V1 = C2 x V2.
    (I didn’t get it in high school, either.)

    *puts on pedant hat*
    The equation says that the molar amount of the solute is equal on both sides of the equation. Since the moles in the concentrated solution aliquot are C1 X V1, this means that in the diluted solution the numbers are the same. So C1*V1/C2 =V2, you can calculate the final volume of the dilute solution.
    *removes pedant hat*

  319. says

    Mormon feminists (yeah, I know, talk about your oxymorons) are being metaphorically beaten about the head and shoulders with the “tone” bat. Got to give them credit for fighting back on this one.

    LDS officials have said that simply asking about the possible ordination of women to the all-male priesthood is not a problem, but the approach taken by Ordain Women is.

    In other words, a question’s “tone,” more than its tune, is what makes it off-limits for Mormons.

    Yet there is no acceptable tone for LDS leaders since these feminists are challenging the status quo, said several speakers Saturday on the last day of the annual Sunstone Symposium in Salt Lake City. […]

    Panelists agreed that Ordain Women had worked hard to create respectful discussions of the issue […]

    In April and October, the women walked quietly to Temple Square in Salt Lake City to ask for standby tickets to the all-male priesthood session of the faith’s General Conference. They dressed in Sunday best, carried no signs, chanted no slogans. They were turned away each time — in the fall after being asked by LDS public relations officials not to enter Temple Square.

    To the church, respectful meant deferential, Kelly said, and, no matter how they voiced their concerns, participants in the Ordain Women movement were not perceived as adequately submissive to authority figures. […]

    Inevitably, [Margaret] Toscano said, if you challenge the system, you will be accused of using “the wrong tone.”

    “All issues about tone, attitude, spirit and interpretation,” she said, “are about knowing your place.” […]

    “Apostasy is not knowing your place in the priesthood hierarchy,” she said, “which for women is at the bottom.”

    Women’s tone can cut another way, too, said panelist Nancy Ross, who heads the social media committee for Ordain Women.

    She said Mormon women often use an infantilizing way of speaking in public — adopting a so-called Primary voice that is most often associated with children — even when addressing adults and mature topics.

    “It’s a voice you do not respect, but look down on,” Ross said. “It’s one you do not want to use.”

    Adopting that Primary voice is one more way, she said, women have been demeaned and disrespected in a church run by men.

    http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/lifestyle/58254493-80/women-church-tone-lds.html.csp

  320. chigau (違う) says

    Rob and Nerd
    Thanks.
    I get the arithmetic.
    I use it at SuperStore to decide if one MegaBox of Shreddies is actually cheaper than two normal boxes.
    What I don’t get is why the Universe is complying with cross-multiplying.
    (and moles are those cute little blind rodenty things)

  321. says

    True Believing Mormon (TBM) readers comment on the Salt Lake Tribune article (link in comment #421):

    Want to find a religion in decline? Go find one that ordains women. Want to find a religion in near collapse? Go find one that elevates women to positions of high leadership. We can argue about the why’s and if that is the way it should be, but that’s what is happening.
    —————-
    I don’t mind these women, but I’ll bet I would hate their wimpy husbands.
    —————
    Women need to do what they were born to do give birth and service their men. I am a better leader both physically and mentally. Women are weak and need male guidance.
    —————–
    Kate Kelly is so yesterdays news. The only people who care are ex mo’s and hate mo’s. No one in the church takes her serious, and only the SLTrib posts articles about her.
    ——————-
    […] “I have done nothing wrong” is Kelly’s refrain, while defying the instructions of her immediate priesthood leaders. That is apostasy…. and false teachers like Kelly will always feign being dumbfounded for being called on it.
    —————-
    She totally deserved to be excommunicated and her actions since have only confirmed that the church made the right decision.

    And non-believers speak up in the comments section:

    Love the honesty about using that “primary voice”. I’ve encountered it numerous times over the years, and almost always manifests itself when an adult woman is speaking to an adult male. It’s actually quite sickening and absolutely demonstrates how many LDS women see themselves in the eyes of male authority figures.

    What do they expect when they tell grown women they can only have one piercing in each ear (as an example)? Treat women their entire lives like they’re children and by God you’ll wind up with women who act like children.
    ——————
    What’s interesting to me is how many historically white supremacist cults like the Mormons and Southern Baptists are still clutching tightly to their misogyny and homophobia. That can’t be a coincidence.
    ———————
    Why couldn’t blacks simply accept that their inferior status was mandated by the Great Sky Wizard?
    ———-
    Why is it that the target of dissent — the sexist, racist, homophobic church leadership and its backers — think they somehow have the right to define what is and isn’t acceptable dissent?

    Calls for civility long have been used in Utah to stifle dissent. Now we’re getting this BS that, “Dissent’s not the issue; it’s how you dissent.”

  322. Rob Grigjanis says

    What I don’t get is why the Universe is complying with cross-multiplying.

    Dunno. I’m still working on fucking magnets. Maybe that came out wrong.

  323. chigau (違う) says

    pedant
    Avocados are fruits.
    /pedant
    .
    .
    .
    um berries
    .
    Never mind.
    Want some rum?

  324. says

    Update on the update: Technical Alex is testing some changes right now, and predicts that there will be some changes made approximately by Wednesday, including the addition of links to the bottom of/top of comment sections.

    Also, there were some complaints about lots of duplications on the main page — some posts were listed in three or four topics. That was entirely an artifact of the upgrade process, which erred on the side of inclusiveness in flagging which posts ought to be listed where. Bloggers now manually tag their posts with what they think is the best topic, and our consensus is that we pick one or at most two for the main page, so it’ll shake out as new posts replace old.

  325. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Thanks PZ, noticed the wallpaper change to cephalopods. Very appropriate.

  326. says

    PZ:

    Bloggers now manually tag their posts with what they think is the best topic, and our consensus is that we pick one or at most two for the main page, so it’ll shake out as new posts replace old.

    I still prefer the previous front page, but as I think about it, I wonder if that setup meant that bloggers at the bottom of the page got fewer visits than those closer to the top.

  327. says

    When a Fox News anchor uses the term “racist” to describe conservatives who are pushing to impeach President Obama, you know something has gone even more seriously wrong with the conservative base. The ultra right-wingers are so far off the reality track that Fox News calls them on it.

    Fox News pundit Juan Williams on Sunday suggested that conservatives calling for President Obama’s impeachment are racist given that they mostly come from white people.

    During a “Fox News Sunday” panel, Heritage Foundation CEO Michael Needham said that while conservatives were concerned that Obama is “lawless,” Democrats are pushing the impeachment rhetoric.

    Williams then tore into Needham, explaining that conservative pundits and some elected officials have been pushing for impeachment.

    “You listen to Michael, and you understand why there are lots of Republicans who think, ‘This man’s a demon, this guy’s awful, we got to get this guy out of here any way we can, he’s breaking the law,’” he said.

    “And then you come on and say, ‘Oh, no. We’re not talking about impeachment, that’s the Democrats.’ All the Democrats are doing is taking advantage of the fact that you guys have demonized President Obama to this extent,” Williams continued.

    He then said that some criticize Obama because of his race.

    “Lot’s of people see it, especially in the minority community, as an attack on the first black president, think it’s unfair, so it’s going spur their turnout in midterms which is going to be critical in several races,” Williams said. […]

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/juan-williams-impeachment-racism

  328. says

    So yeah, everyone is armed in Texas. How’s that going for them?

    […] The man and his wife got into an argument in their home, according to the Houston Police Department. The wife got into a car, drove away and crashed the car a few blocks down the road.

    She had minor injuries, and police have not determined whether they were from the crash or the argument with her husband, according to KHOU.

    Police said that when the man saw his wife’s accident, he ran from the home toward her car.

    A homeowner near the car accident saw the man running and yelled for him to stop. The husband kept running and reportedly had something in his hand, according to police.

    The homeowner said he feared for his life and shot the man, police told KHOU.

    The man was taken to the hospital, where he later died, according to police. […]

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/man-shot-dead-houston

  329. opposablethumbs says

    Yay cephalopods.
    .
    .
    I didn’t know the formula (and didn’t manage to come up with it either), so I had to work it out like this in Very Small Steps:
    .
    (Nerd et al, do not laugh. I haven’t done this or anything like it for mumblemumble decades.)
    .
    OK, I thought, I got some 29% stuffs. I want some 5% stuffs. How much more diluted is 5% stuffs than 29% stuffs? (thinks: 5% is a twentieth. So I want my end solution to contain 1/20 Pure Stuff and 19/20 water. If I had started with 100% stuffs, now I’d be making it 20 times more diluted. If I had started with 30% stuffs, now I’d be making it 6 times more diluted. Aha!) Must be how-many-times-does-5-go-into-29 times more diluted.
    .
    So I do 29/5 = 5.8 (thank you calculator). I need to take X amount of my original stuffs, and dilute it 5.8 times.
    .
    Now, if I want to end up with 125ml of this new dilution, that means … X amount, diluted 5.8 times, has got to = 125
    .
    So X times 5.8 = 125
    .
    So X amount = 125/5.8 (which is 21.55longstringofdecimals), so I use 21.55ml of the old stuff and make up the rest of the volume with water.
    .
    Phew.
    .
    I went the looooooong way round all right! And the more I think about it, the less sense it seems to make. I suspect I was actually quite probably thinking about it all wrong, but got the right answer by serendipity because my wrongnesses must have cancelled each other out.
    .
    So I asked DaughterSpawn, who just came in, and of course she knew the formula. Oh well.

  330. says

    Paul Ryan is thinking about running for President of the USA in 2016. Here’s what this supposedly intelligent doofus had to say about climate change:

    Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) said Wednesday that “climate change occurs no matter what,” but that the EPA’s recent efforts to reduce emissions from existing power plants are “outside of the confines of the law,” and “an excuse to grow government, raise taxes and slow down economic growth.”

    Speaking at a breakfast hosted by the Christian Science Monitor in Washington, Rep. Ryan said that he would argue that the “federal government, with all its tax and regulatory schemes” can’t do anything about climate change. He said that what climate regulations “end up doing is making the U.S. economy less competitive.”

    The EPA’s proposed rules to curb carbon emissions from existing power plants do not fall outside the confines of the law but rather adhere strictly to the wording and intent of the Clean Air Act while at the same time attempt to accommodate state-level flexibility. Congress passed the law, the President is enforcing it, and the courts have upheld it. Section 111(d) of the Clean Air Act requires the EPA to develop regulations for “air pollution which may endanger public health or welfare.” In 2007 and again in 2011, the Supreme Court ruled that carbon pollution fits under that category. […]

    http://thinkprogress.org/climate/2014/07/31/3466136/paul-ryan-climate-change-epa-outside-the-law/

  331. Pteryxx says

    What my brain doesn’t grok is why C1 x V1 = C2 x V2.
    (I didn’t get it in high school, either.)

    The way I thought of it is: (total amount of stuff) = (total amount of stuff)
    where one side is the tiny volume with high concentration (say, shot glass) and the other side is big volume with low concentration (say, swimming pool). Yet they both contain the same amount of stuff-of-interest.

  332. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    (Nerd et al, do not laugh. I haven’t done this or anything like it for mumblemumble decades.)

    Everybody who showed their work, and I could follow it, and came up with the correct answer always got full credit. It’s just easier to grade with the correct formulas.
    My MIL doesn’t do algebra. But she does get the same answers as if she did algebra. Shhh….don’t mention that she is effectively doing algebra according to the Redhead, or then she freezes up.

  333. carlie says

    Rawnaeris – no, just a regular paint job (was thinking of bringing my own polish).

  334. morgan ?! epitheting a metaphor says

    RAIN!
    Yesssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Thunder and good old wet stuff, most of last night and a real frog-strangler this afternoon. But now we have flash flood warnings and those can get nasty. Ya can’t win. I just hope we don’t have any fires started by lightening strikes. This is the SoCal Mountains. Is doing nothing for the fires up north. Gawd I love the smell of wet earth after a long dry spell.

  335. jste says

    Yer basic Latvian potatoe has wings!?
    What do the fancy models have, prehensile eye-stalks?

    I read a documentary once about an evil sentient potato that mind controlled people with soundwaves. We were all saved when some kid got a cold and his ears filled up with mucus, so he couldn’t hear the mind control soundwaves anymore. (It was a real book, I swear. Everything written in real books is true, right?!! Why are you looking at me funny?) /s

    So I have a friend, who has discovered “Blood type dieting”. It was a new one to me, so I looked into it, and as far as I can tell, it’s a crock of shit, but I feel like I can’t exactly go tell her that (like I ordinarily would) because she’s actually getting results, and I’d feel like shit for getting in the way of that. People are confusing. :(

  336. says

    Based on my experiences, you should* be fine then. Many places seal nail clippers/files into separate packages to show they’ve been cleaned. You can ask how they do their sanitation too. If you’re still worried, you can bring your own cuticle nippers and the like (I’ve never don’t that, but I’ve heard of people doing it).

    *caveat being that I can’t vouch for your particular location.

  337. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I don’t understand why there’s still no direct link to the comments with “### comments” on the posts. Am I missing something somehow?

  338. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    I don’t understand why there’s still no direct link to the comments with “### comments” on the posts. Am I missing something somehow?

    If you want to cite a given post, the data is in the date/time hyperlink, just as it was previously. Click on it, and do a copypaste, or copy the link. A second hyperlink to the same data went away.

  339. says

    #436, Tony:

    Yes. On the previous main page, the two highest traffic bloggers had a permanent lock on the top of the page. One of the goals here was to break the pattern of simply reinforcing them that already has.

  340. says

    I thought Azzy meant “why is there no button at the bottom of the OP saying “450 comments” or whatever.

    Which is odd, because I can see such a link, so I’m wondering why you can’t, Azzy? Or have I misunderstood?

  341. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I don’t understand why there’s still no direct link to the comments with “### comments” on the posts. Am I missing something somehow?

    If you want to cite a given post, the data is in the date/time hyperlink, just as it was previously. Click on it, and do a copypaste, or copy the link. A second hyperlink to the same data went away.

    What.

    I thought Azzy meant “why is there no button at the bottom of the OP saying “450 comments” or whatever.

    Which is odd, because I can see such a link, so I’m wondering why you can’t, Azzy? Or have I misunderstood?

    Yeah, that.

    I’m wondering too. Here is what I see on the main page. >.> I’m using Opera 12.17 as noted in previous comments referencing “heinous Chrome clone”.

  342. birgerjohansson says

    Lynna, I first thought this link was about Paul Ryan. “P” and “R” got me confused.
    New Evidence Suggests Testimony That Sent Man To Death Was A Lie
    http://www.themarshallproject.org/2014/08/03/did-texas-execute-an-innocent-man-willingham/ …and Rick Perry is involved.
    — — —
    Bring Narsil to your next thesis defence.
    http://xkcd.com/1403/
    — — —
    89 Thoughts That Run Through A Woman’s Head When She Looks At Dick Pics http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/30/dick-pic-janet-looks-at-89-dicks_n_5635212.html?cps=gravity

  343. opposablethumbs says

    rq, just in case – don’t know if you’ve sent me any other emails since the other day, but as I know my email reader seems to be playing up I thought I should mention that I haven’t received any. Anyway, like I said before, no probs – just be sure to mention that I am a Bear of Very Little Brain, ok? :-)

  344. says

    That really sucks, rq.

    Our summer has been (for me) delightful. Rain every few days, only a week or two at most of 27+ temps, the rest of the time the daily highs have been in the 20-24 range. Nights dropping to 11-18 (all temps C).

    If I were to design a summer, this would be how I’d design it. :)

    So I’m sorry to hear you’re off having a brute ’round the Baltic. Hope it breaks soon.

    rq, are you far enough north to have white nights? That’d be cool. But I bet it wouldn’t make my sleep disturbances any better.

    I’m looking forward to the annual meteors for my natal day next week, though I’m not sure I’ll be able to get out in the country like I’d like to. Always been a pleasure, to have a meteor shower laid on by the uncaring universe for my enjoyment.

    I say natal day, because it’s not really the day I celebrate much anymore. September 8 is the day I celebrate now, because it has a much greater significance for me. Hope your AROTE is/was/will be good for you.

  345. ButchKitties says

    If I may call upon the collective wisdom of the Horde: What are some essential items to pack for a 5-7 day stay in the hospital? I figure basic toiletries, PJs, robe, slippers, books/iPad, various chargers, earplugs, & noise canceling headphones. I have all the relevant paperwork (medical history, meds list, insurance, etc.) kept together in a binder. I’m sure I’m missing something obvious. Lately my brain has been feeling like it wants to jump out of my skull and fall to floor, upon which it will shatter into claymation mice that will scurry away in every possible direction.

  346. rq says

    ButchKitties
    Clean underwear and socks?
    The rest looks pretty good to me.

    CaitieCat
    I’m still trying to figure out what AROTE means…
    But your kind of summer sounds like my ideal kind of summer. Temperatures over 25 and excessive humidity, and I’m like a lizard in winter: sluggish and bad-tempered. I like rain every now and then, and not as thunderstorms but a nice, afternoon downpour, with lots of sunshine and birdsong the next morning. When I visited you, that was sort of a borderline day for me – almost way too hot, but not hot enough to not walk. :)
    We have almost-white nights. The season’s mostly done now, but right around Midsummer, it never gets completely dark, and there’s only a couple of hours where the sun isn’t visible. You can read books out on the street with no additional artificial lighting until past 10PM, which is always kind of weird. Then it gets light as day again by 3AM, so yeah… Sometimes I get up, thinking I’ve overslept, and I realize it’s not even 6AM.
    (Winter, though, is dreadfully dark.)

    opposablethumbs
    I did send you an email, but that was today, and I added a line about the bear of very little brain, so here’s hoping it gets through to you!

  347. says

    Sorry, forgot, AROTE: Arbitrary Rotation of the Earth. It’s from Shakesville’s Open Threads, where the round-the-world nature of the readership meant it was rarely appropriate to say “hope you have a good day”, because people were variously starting, finishing, or in the middle of their days. So it was settled on to use AROTE as a general-purpose term for “your local day”, whence it became sort of a greeting.

    Similarly, given the wide number of different places various cultures start their year, my usual greeting for a New Year is “Happy New Orbit!”, because really, it’s all just arbitrary, isn’t it? There’s actually no reason to assume that just because we call this AROTE “Monday”, that everyone everywhere has to. There’s nothing about a given set of seven rotations that they should form a closed class of ‘names for orbital rotations’, except that memorizing a few dozen different names for days would get cumbersome quickly.

    I just always like to notice when we do things by tradition that are more or less arbitrary, like driving on different sides of the road, or what we say when someone sneezes, things like that.

  348. The Mellow Monkey says

    birgerjohansson

    Should your driverless car kill you to save a child’s life? http://phys.org/news/2014-08-driverless-car-child-life.html

    Meh. This is a fine question to ask in a purely hypothetical, ethical context, but it’s really shitty as far as real world applications go. It’s like trying to design public transportation around the trolley problem.

    1) It is dangerous to swerve in that situation. Not just to the driver, but to pedestrians and any other drivers on the road. It’s not just a matter of the driver’s life versus the life of the person in the road. Swerving in that situation could kill the pedestrian, the driver, any passengers the driver has, and other cars who then get involved in the accident.

    2) In situations with poor visibility where a pedestrian (or animal or non-living obstacle) might suddenly pop onto the road, a self-driving vehicle should already be programmed to reduce speed before any obstacles appear and be prepared to brake. A road only has one lane with certain death on either side? FFS, the car should be driving slowly through there.

    And situations like that are also exactly why these vehicles require someone in the driver’s seat who can take control just by grabbing the steering wheel or hitting the brakes. The choice is always, ultimately, in the driver’s hands.

  349. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    CaitieCat,

    We might be sharing a Natal Day! Mine is on the 11th.

  350. rq says

    It’s 29 degrees downstairs in the kitchen. I don’t want to know the numbers for the second floor.

  351. says

    Very very nearly, then. :)

    My whole FOO is August: my mother on the 6th in ’46, me on the 12th in ’66 (a month after my mother was jumping around 36 weeks pregnant when we won the World Cup, which is my Victorian answer on why I love football so much), and my sister on the 1st in ’69. Then my niece a couple of years ago on the 18th. My dad was born in January, but he died in August (28th, ’81; my sister and I survived, and maybe someday I’ll tell y’all that one).

    *makes sekrit notes*

  352. opposablethumbs says

    Greetings, Horde and ::waves:: to rq and CaitieCat. I can haz yr messages, thx + yay! Hailing frequencies opened :-) And I’m hoping to get someone to lend me a hand in a few days time, to try and work out what on earth I did to my email settings (my work email is still perfectly normal, but as I mentioned my personal one is only receiving – if I try to send anything to anyone anywhere it just bounces back, so obviously I have screwed up somewhere somehow).

    The good: I seem to have just got another bit of work to do, which will be nice once it’s finished. The bad: I have just broken my old, v basic kindle which means Woe My Life Is Over I no longer have anything to read on when on the bus/out/ anywhere but sitting at my desk, which kind of feels like Woe My Life etc. because it is was totally my beloved-portable-security-blanket-got-to-de-stresser-retreat-from-the-world-in-handy-almost-pocket-format I am cursing myself for ten kinds of idiot.

  353. says

    Yeah, rq, that was the hottest part of our summer. It went about ten days of 28+, with a few over 30+, and I’m just not built for it. As you noted, and picture-seers will have too, I’m paler than a Procol Harum hit, and I don’t tan. I burn, peel, and freckle. I have a more or less permanent brownness to my lower arms and just above and below my knees, from many, many days on very hot football pitches, either refereeing or playing. The freckles run together some. But the non-sun bits of my body, i.e., everywhere else, is pale pale pale. My mum (who isn’t so afflicted) used to say that I was a true child of England, a skin built for both seasons, “The Rainy Season” and “June 25th”. We have a lot of gingers in the family, and while my hair is only slightly reddish – well, was – I definitely got the ginger-skin.

    I’m like you, rq, in that above a certain heat/humidity combination I basically shut down, and become grumpy as fuck. That’s the main reason I have air conditioning at all, for those hot/humid days where the sweat just lies on my skin, piling up a horrible insulating layer that won’t evaporate, and making me hotter and hotter. Plus, I hate sweating for nothing. I don’t mind it so much when I’m working out or something, but to just sit and sweat is unpleasant.

    I couldn’t ever live much south of where I am now. I could easily live more north, and I suspect as the climate shifts, that’ll become more true. Visiting the Mouse in Baltimore in the summer is already a hard ask for me, and since they got their power-saver deal on their A/C, more or less impossible (their utility turns up the thermostat on high-usage days, whether they want it to go up or not).

    Plus, they have these giant 3cm-long hornets, that freak me RIGHT OUT, because I have both a lethal allergy and a well-developed phobia about bees/wasps/wingéd yellow flying death machines. And before you rush to tell me it`s not a phobia because they really can kill me, you haven’t seen me react yet. Previous reactions include sincerely requesting that a police officer shoot into my car, then occupied by a ginormous wasp of some sort (to me it looked like the one in that Doctor Who episode, though I’m sure it was a more normal sixteen or seventeen cm long – that’s right, isn’t it, they’re about half the length of a ruler?).

    The crappy thing is, summer is hot and makes me grumpy (usually; hence why i like this one so much). And winter is long and dark and makes me SAD and sad, even though I like the cold and snow. And it traps me indoors, when the snow gets bad, as it did this winter, and that’s really bad for me.

    So I’m left having to love spring and autumn. :)

  354. opposablethumbs says

    Um, John has … a fuzzy upper lip; not a long moustache as such, just a bit of a Movember look going on. How about O’thumbs, or just plain thumbs? :-)

    Summer is good here (early summer is my favourite), but then it never really gets that hot. Low-to-mid-twenties is heaven, high twenties to low thirties is a bloody miracle and never lasts more than a day or two. But crisp sunny cool days in autumn are wonderful when we see any like that. With such vast, blue, blue skies …

  355. says

    Ryokai! Shorter shave it is. :)

    Oh, and you want big skies, you need to get out west in the US or Canada, or Siberia/Mongolia. I would imagine parts of Australia too. Just huge flatness, with nothing to interrupt but sky and maybe a grain elevator. Incredible place to look at the stars, too.

    Sigh. I set off my traveljones. :/

  356. rq says

    CaitieCat
    While I don’t have the allergy, I have a serious aversion to hornets and wasps. Bees, I can deal with. They’re fuzzy and they die when they sting. Wasps? Hornets? Like that giant 4cm one that flew into our balcony a couple of years ago??? No thanks!!!
    I don’t get SAD in the winter, I just get sad, but I still love it more than any other season. My body’s built for it. Doesn’t really deal with heat well (too dense to actually get it out of the system, so to speak), but cold? Bring it on, snow and all. But autumn and spring are their own very special beautifulness. In spring, especially here – once you start noticing that, hey, the sun’s still around! – there’s that beautiful feeling of everything waking up and coming alive again (even people). In autumn, it’s the crisp winds and evenings, and something about the angle of the sun on the colours of the leaves, and it just breaks my heart to see. Pretty big skies here, too (flat country), but I can’t compare it to the prairies.

  357. blf says

    I read a documentary once about an evil sentient potato that mind controlled people with soundwaves.

    There’s already a book about rq‘s invasion of Canada !?

  358. says

    The violence in Benghazi took place about two years ago. The incident has been investigated by:
    House Intelligence Committee
    Senate Intelligence Committee
    State Department Accountability Review Board
    Senate Armed Services Committee
    House Committee on Foreign Affairs
    House Committee on Oversight & Government Reform
    House Armed Service Committee
    Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee

    No evidence of a cover-up was found. None of the rightwing talking points turned out to be true. This means that there was no “stand-down order” given to American personnel offering assistance, no illegal arms transfers were documented, no illegal activity of any kind was documented, no Americans were left behind. No one was deliberately misled, no assets were withheld.

    So what do Republicans want to do next? They want to fund yet another investigative committee. They want to spend a few more million dollars asking the same questions they’ve already asked.

    http://www.msnbc.com/rachel-maddow-show/what-conspiratorial-madness-looks

  359. says

    I have not really been a part of these serial socializing posts because I have some really bad social anxiety issues. But I’m having some really difficult issues and I was hoping that I could get some other perspectives. Would it be alright if I asked about some things that I’m dealing with here?

  360. blf says

    The way I thought of it is: (total amount of stuff) = (total amount of stuff) where one side is the tiny volume with high concentration (say, shot glass) and the other side is big volume with low concentration (say, swimming pool). Yet they both contain the same amount of stuff-of-interest.

    Use the mildly deranged penguin’s approach: Get a bigger shot glass (size of two swimming pools) and fill it with the same proportion of the stuff-of-interestuisce beatha as in the small shot glass. For instance, in both the small and big shot glass, one lonely molecule of water being kept company by the uisce beatha.

    Now drink both shots, then go to the distillery for a refill or thirty.

  361. rq says

    Brony
    Welcome in, and definitely! You may not receive a reply immediately or within the hour, but be assured that someone is always reading eventually, and someone always has, if not a word of advice, then a word of support!

  362. pHred says

    Hello! I haven’t commented in ages – just lurked. But now I have this childish need to see what my gravatar looks like.

    Plus I am busy hyperventilating – and trying to distracy myself. One sprong is at camp for the week (it’s a Y camp because the Camp Quest sites are way too far away :( but it is one that has a good reputation and he went with his 5th grade class and loved it). I am sure he is fine, but I am a bit of a mess.

    My other sprong is at an art camp at a Botanical Gardens but turns out the roads to get there are causing me stress. I have been weird about certain kinds of highways ever since a construction trunk tried to kill me on one – but to get her to camp I pretty much have no choice but to use the elevated highway or to take a route three times as long through some rather sketchy neighborhoods (sketchy as in the last time I drove through there was a car on fire in the road.) I am currently trying to gear myself up to drive there to pick her up. Eek – it’s only for a week, it’s only for a week. I can do this.

    Random dark chocolate and support for everyone in need of it.

  363. says

    Oh, look, our old friend Cliven Bundy has not learned to STFU. This also counts as a Moment of Mormon Madness.

    “If the standoff with the Bundys was wrong, would the Lord have been with us?” Bundy asked, noting that no one was killed as tensions escalated. “Could those people that stood without fear and went through that spiritual experience … have done that without the Lord being there? No they couldn’t.”

    “The Lord told me … if (the sheriff doesn’t) take away these arms (from federal agents), we the people will have to face these arms in a civil war. He said, ‘This is your chance to straighten this thing up,'” Bundy said.

    Taken at face value, Bundy’s statement means that the Lord is working through the federal Bureau of Land Management. It was BLM personnel that wisely backed off in order to make certain that no one was shot.

    http://www.thespectrum.com/story/news/local/2014/08/02/bundy-showdown-feds-spiritual-battle/13536097/

    “There was people from almost every state in this United States was there. Some of them told me they’d traveled for 40 hours to get there,” Bundy said in the common language of a man who has spent his life and livelihood in the Silver State’s desert climate. “Why did they come? … Because they felt like they needed to. They was spiritually touched.”

    Ummm. Beware of being “spiritually touched.”

    Here’s the most blatant Moment of Mormon Madness:

    The IAP [Independent American Party] draws much of its inspiration from statements made by leaders of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and the majority of its members are LDS and Utah residents, although Gneiting said the party is not about doctrines specific to the Mormon religion or any other faith that believes in the biblical “providence of the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.”

    The LDS church does not endorse any political party, although its Utah members are heavily conservative and Republican.

    Even so, Bundy’s and Mack’s comments were largely couched in the language of the believer and the gathering at times took on the spirit of a revival.

    “If our (U.S.) Constitution is an inspired document by our Lord Jesus Christ, then isn’t it scripture?” he asked.

    “Yes,” a chorus of voices replied.

    “Isn’t it the same as the Book of Mormon and the Bible?” Bundy asked.

    “Absolutely,” the audience answered. […]

    You can read about more mormon references at the link.

  364. rq says

    pHred
    I’ll take your dark chocolate and trade you some in return, sounds like you need it!
    My Eldest was at a camp for the first time this year, and it was less nerve-wracking due to the fact that it’s a camp I went to as a child – but it was still nerve-wracking! (They handle it better than we do, anyway.)
    I hope your drive out to pick up Sprong2 isn’t nearly as stressful as you’re expecting. And Sprong1 will have an awesome time (I hope).

  365. rq says

    Lynna @492

    in the common language of a man who has spent his life and livelihood in the Silver State’s desert climate

    Soooo basicallyyyy…. English?
    The rest of that – creepy as all hell. :/

  366. says

    rq @494, Yes, Cliven Bundy and his ilk are creepy and then some. What worries me is that the one thing mormons are good at is organization. They can organize and motivate large groups like no other group, in my limited experience anyway. They have an effect on Nevada, Arizona, and, of course, Utah politics in a big way.

  367. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I’m not sure which is more alarming, that those fuckers actually stuck it out in the heat or that the government is just sitting on their hands.

  368. says

    Here’s the Daily Kos coverage of the findings from the House Intelligence Committee report on Benghazi.

    This committee is dominated by Republicans and they still couldn’t spin any kind of conspiracy to implicate President Obama or his staff in the Benghazi violence.

    […] Among the Intelligence Committee’s findings, according to Thompson:

    — Intelligence agencies were “warned about an increased threat environment, but did not have specific tactical warning of an attack before it happened.”

    — “A mixed group of individuals, including those associated with al Qaeda, (Moammar) Khadafy loyalists and other Libyan militias, participated in the attack.”

    — “There was no ‘stand-down order’ given to American personnel attempting to offer assistance that evening, no illegal activity or illegal arms transfers occurring by U.S. personnel in Benghazi, and no American was left behind.”

    — The administration’s process for developing “talking points” was “flawed, but the talking points reflected the conflicting intelligence assessments in the days immediately following the crisis.” […]

    This is a followup to comment #485.

  369. Esteleth is Groot says

    So, over the past [handwavey length of time] I’ve been disgruntled over my general lack of being-in-shape. Relatively recently, I concluded that I had two options, namely to change my habits or be prepared to drop $$$ on a new wardrobe to accommodate my wider frame. I am poor (unemployed college student FTW!) so I decided that the former would be preferable. I examined my ancient bike and concluded that it wanted no more than some air in the tires and some oil on the chains.

    Today I rode to and from campus, a distance of about 2 miles (that’s 3.2 km for the non-Yanks) each way. I just got home. I’m hot and sweaty (it’s 80 Fahrenheit – 26.7 Celsius – out) but I feel great. The trip was pleasant – there’s a lovely bike path that runs alongside a river. On the way in, there were birds chirping, and on the way home I mostly heard sawflies, which I’m somewhat meh over, but I also saw some baby deer! :D :D