There goes my pro football career


I’ll never get picked up in the NFL draft now.

Those of you who read the comments know I was whining a little bit about this sudden knee pain that developed over night. I was actually downplaying it — any time I bent my knee I was in excruciating agony. My wife can tell you that there was much screaming and groaning and cussing at our house the last few days. I’ve been basically immobile.

So I got into the doctor’s this morning. They poked and prodded and twisted and bent the joint, and I dutifully turned pale and howled and threatened to vomit, cursing the entire medical profession. In revenge, they first pulled out a gigantic needle and a huge syringe, and tapped my knee, sucking out large quantities of synovial fluid. As if that wasn’t enough, they’ve also hospitalized me — I’m under observation and pain management for a few days, while they carry out tests to figure out what made my knee joint go bad. If it turns out to be an infection…surgery. Whee.

Until then, I’m stuck in a bed with needles stuck in me, and they’re pumping me full of antibiotics and morphine and a whole bunch of good happy drugs. I’m already feeling blissful and sleepy. I might be out in 24 hours, or maybe 48, or maybe they’ll be hacking cartilage for a while. You don’t need me right now, right?

Comments

  1. chigau (違う) says

    Take care PZ, insofar as that’s under your control.
    We’ll be fine.
    Probably.
    *ominous organ music*

  2. says

    Needles. Shudder.
    I hope you get back to normal fast.

    My wife can tell you that there was much screaming and groaning and cussing at our house the last few days.

    With the whining we see around here about cussing and profanity, I’m picturing you being followed around at home by Norse Tone Trolls.

  3. Anthony K says

    Feel better soon, PZ.
    (And don’t worry about chigau’s nefariousness. With all the forest fire smog here she can’t see well enough to get into any real trouble. None of us can.)

  4. cicely says

    […] I’m under observation and pain management for a few days, while they carry out tests to figure out what made my knee joint go bad.

    It’s the Horses, I tells ya!
    Aided and abetted by the peas.
     
    More seriously, I hope you see fast improvement, and ideally the Resumption of Normal Service.

  5. Gorogh, Lounging Peacromancer says

    May the miracles of pharmacology soothe your pain, and may skilled medical professionals be able to rid you of its cause. Mh that was full of pathos, but still sincere.

  6. yazikus says

    Take care and feel better soon!

    When I was little my dad had knee surgery, and they recorded it and we loved to watch it. It looked like outer space.

  7. Randomfactor says

    “And lo, the Almighty did smite the infidel in the ___________(fill in the blank with appropriate body part when known.)”

    See? Just as they prophesied.

  8. Thorne says

    I wish you well, PZ. I had to spend several days in the hospital, in two different areas in the last 45 days. Three days for a hip replacement and four days for angioplasty. Do yourself a favor: try to minimize the use of the pain drugs. They don’t really stop the pain, just make you not care so much about it. And, in my experience, they can actually delay your recovery by making you less steady on your feet.

    It also helps if you can find yourself a good witch doctor to dance naked around your hospital bed. Won’t do much for your knee, but laughing at the shocked and horrified expressions on the faces of the nursing staff will definitely cheer you up.

    Feel better!

  9. timberwoof says

    Ow.

    You have my sympathy. I’ve already got an appointment with the Designer; there are a few flaws in the Design that I’d like to go over with him. I’m going to bring a baseball bat with an attached power point.

  10. busterggi says

    I’ll pray for you.

    No, seriously listen to your docs and get well instead.

  11. ibyea says

    It’s God’s punishment for all the anti cat blog posts. ;)

    In all seriousness, get well!

  12. thelifeofbrine says

    Feel better! See if they can save the synovial fluid. If our troop can collect enough of it we get a special merit badge.

  13. David Wilford says

    Sympathies, and hope the docs figure out the problem soon. They’re pretty good at knees these days, thankfully.

  14. Anthony K says

    They’re pretty good at knees these days, thankfully.

    They’re getting better, but nobody beats babies when it comes to problems with one’s head and shoulders, knees and toes.

  15. jstackpo says

    Nothing wrong with little legal access to controlled substances…

    No habits, though, please.

  16. says

    I had a friend come down with a massively swollen painful knee and it turned out to be parvo virus. The doctors ignored the fever and headaches as referred pain, and concluded they had lupus and gave them … a course of immunosuppressants. Nice.

  17. =8)-DX says

    @Marcus #20

    That should be “I used to be a blogger, but then …”. Or poopyhead. I think PZ is definitely no longer a poopyhead if he has a busted knee.

  18. OldEd says

    Hey, it’s only a KNEE, PZ, right? With me it’s the following:

    a) heart attack, with lousy treatment
    b) SECOND heart attack – atrial fibrillation, actually, but this time with EXCELLENT care at a MAJOR TEACHING HOSPITAL, which my cardiologist said was exactly what I needed.
    I left with a defibrillator, which is a pacemaker on steroids, if anyone is wondering.
    c) while in the CICU for b), found out that my kidneys were failing
    d) eventually went on dialysis: first the hemo kind, with #15 needles (two of them) in my wrist three times a week,followed by the peritoneal kind, hooked up to a cycler for 9 hours every night. Did extremely well on peritoneal – according to my nephrologist. Still felt like luke-warm extremely liquid fecal matter all the time.
    e) finally got a kidney: it takes a year or so to recover from kidney failure: it took me 14 months, only to find out that’
    f) the bursa in my right hip is pretty much shot, and that I have a bone spur that interferes with my motion: I thought it was just getting old and stiff. I got some therapy – mainly steroid shots into the bursa which removed the pain…. for now….

    So now I face
    g) hip replacement rather soon, because at 73, I’ll soon age out of that sort of major surgery. It’s a race between aging out and being bad enough to get a new hip.

    So you might need a new knee: it’s not bad, according to the surgeon I was referred to: I think I’ll rely on him, because both my cardiologist and my nephrologist would let him operate on their mothers: in fact he already has on the cardiolgists mom.

    And if you think you aren’t getting the respect you deserve from the docs and such, even though you are a PhD Biologist, remember: they practice MEDICINE, which, according to several MD’s I’ve had discourse with, isn’t Science, it’s MEDICINE.

  19. machintelligence says

    As someone with a bad pair of knees (more of a percussion section, actually) I really feel for you.
    I wish you a full and speedy recovery.

  20. morgan ?! epitheting a metaphor says

    PZ’s kneezy
    Popping out of place,
    PZ’s kneezy
    Cannot run a race,
    PZ’s kneezy
    Causing such a spectacle,
    PZ’s kneezy
    Would rather be a tentacle.

    Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week. Don’t forget to tip your nurse.

  21. jnorris says

    If you need a break from the drugs I can be there in about five hours, seven tops.

    Good luck and do get yourself well.

  22. Moggie says

    Seriously, fuck knees. They’re just not up to the job, in my painful experience.

  23. says

    Some design, huh?
    You’d think they’d be carbon fiber and ceramic, or something like that. But – noooooooo… design by committee.

  24. frankb says

    PZ, you seem to be trying to give us the impression that you are a bad patient. But I doubt that you are. We know that you have to maintain your image as an evil tentacled overlord and threatening everyone around you is mandatory. But be nice to the nurses. They have their ways of getting revenge. Get well soon.

  25. Rich Woods says

    Echoing Kamaka #38. Feel free to let rip. We wouldn’t want you getting bored.

  26. says

    I got this, PZ. I just bough the goat and will be burning it later this evening. You should be feeling better soon. No need to thank me. I know the doctors will try to take credit for success, but just so you know, if this goes south, it was probably their fault. Goats never lead me astray.

  27. a_ray_in_dilbert_space says

    PZ,
    Do they have deer ticks out there in the wilds of MN? They drew over 50 ccs of fluid off of my knee when I had Lyme disease. Took about 6 months to kick that, but at least I didn’t need surgery.

  28. opposablethumbs says

    I hope your hospital stay is utterly routine and boring – and restful – and that your knee (and of course all tentacles) are soon restored to normal functioning. (PZedian Knees are prehensile, right? Or is that just tentacles?).

    Get well, PZ.
    With transatlantic affectionate respects.

  29. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Take care, PZ. I hope you’ll feel better soon.

  30. Ragutis says

    Best wishes, PZ. Hope you’re back on your feet soon.

    But, yes, don’t be shy about writing in an opiate haze. Worked for Coleridge, Wilde, Shelley and many more.

  31. cattleya1 says

    PZ – I truly hope it is simply gout in an awful location. Certainly, neither my knees nor my metabolism (familial gout) were intelligently designed. Perhaps once this is over, you could pass the bill along to Ken Ham…

  32. ledasmom says

    Hope you’re feeling better soon. Stupid knees. I have been suggesting to the husband for years (possibly decades) now that we chop his legs off and replace them with robot parts, and I think he may finally be considering it. It’s not only the knees, but they are major offenders.
    Is it a common thing with people that painkillers don’t kill pain, they just make you not care? All they’ve ever done for me, the two times I had serious painkillers, was kill pain. Well, three times technically, I guess, but for labor pains they did fuck all.

  33. says

    Well, it’s going to be a quick couple of days at this rate. After I posted this, they came in with the morphine and the codeine, and I just passed out cold. I think I’m going to be in and out of consciousness for a while.

  34. Anthony K says

    Eh, I’ve been in and out of consciousness on a roughly daily basis for nearly four decades.

    (Sorry, PZ. I couldn’t let those other folks try to goat you into a response without butting in myself.)

  35. adamk says

    That’s what you get for opting for the whole bone-and-joint arrangement instead of the nice sniny tentacles.

  36. HolyPinkUnicorn says

    After I posted this, they came in with the morphine and the codeine, and I just passed out cold.

    Your critics are getting serious, aren’t they?

  37. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    You see what happens when you go away PZ? The GOATS are already ON FIRE!!!1!1!1!!

    Get well soon.

  38. raven says

    Morphine-hazed writing? Oh, please, type away!

    Sure why not?

    It worked for William S. Burroughs and Coleridge. For some values of worked.

    Some design, huh?

    You’d think they’d be carbon fiber and ceramic, or something like that. But – noooooooo… design by committee.

    The design isn’t great but isn’t bad considering they started with a fish fin.

    It’s the repair capabilities that really fail. It’s like RM + S invented planned obsolescence.

    With better repair capacities these events wouldn’t keep happening. A salamander can grow a new limb, a starfish can grow a new arm, a starfish arm can grow a new starfish, and humans can grow new,… not much of anything. IIRC, children can regenerate finger tips sometimes.

  39. says

    #53, Anthony K:

    No fair! You’re taking advantage of me when my wits are addled!

    I shall shake my cane at you and grumble incoherently.

  40. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Are you folk all trying to make PZ feel bad? I mean, the man has just lost his NFL career and you’re all punting….

  41. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    About time for the infamous hospital food, guaranteed to make you get well so you can taste something with even a trace of spice it in.

  42. Anthony K says

    Get the bones removed, and then see if they’ll fry up the leg and toss it with some hot sauce. Then all you need is some bleu cheese dressing…

    As for addled wits, now we’re on an even footing. Er, sorry, poor choice of words.

  43. twas brillig (stevem) says

    Get well, PZ. Don’t rush it, take your time. More damage can be done if active too soon. Just asking, not (armchair) diagnosing: did your orthopod (smirk) rule out problems of the meniscus? I’ve known many people who had that malady; one very recently. Seems a common knee issue.
    And…gotta share this pseudo-factoid (urban legend?): I’ve heard that when morphine is used to relieve pain, addiction is unlikely. When morphine is used without pain (to get high) is the risk of addiction mostly assured. I’m really telling myself this, cuz I’m an addictive personality, so if I ever need a morphine drip, I gotta know that the pain relief won’t result in addiction.
    Cheers, PZ.
    I guess the hosp will shield you from the MN summer bird (mosquitoes).

  44. PDX_Greg says

    There’s nothing wrong with you that an expensive operation can’t prolong! (an old Monty Python line that I always recite to myself whenever I go under the knife). I had knee surgery ten years ago for an injury, went through the crazy swelling and the needle treatment, and I was fortunate in my case that it turned out quite well without any lingering problems of note (although the weeks of having to stay reclined with my knee raised were pure mental torture). Hopefully you can avoid surgery but either way, may your convalescence be both short and productive.

  45. Ray, rude-ass yankee (now in HD-3D!) says

    I thought we were supposed to boil the goat in its mothers milk (or something)? I’m not sure how that fits with it being on fire. *confused*
    PZ, I hope the whole knee thing gets resolved quickly & painlessly as possible. Tentacle transplant may be the way to go!

  46. congenital cynic says

    Empathy here. I have a beak tear in the meniscus of my left knee (which luckily only acts up infrequently), and the start of arthritis in the right hip, which is by far the more painful of the two, and which has already seriously limited the range of motion of my right leg. Getting old is no fun. I tell my students that “inside every older person is a younger person saying ‘what the fuck happened?’ “. Of course they don’t get it…. yet.

    Hope you get a better resolution to your knee issue.

  47. azpaul3 says

    It is good to see you maintain your humor through the fog. I know it is difficult but do try to enjoy the drugs.

    This has all been said but let me reiterate.

    If you had a tentacle this would not have happened.
    If they can replace the appendage with a tentacle this would be good.
    Yes, this is god’s punishment upon you for your sins against crackers.
    [Slaps PZ’s forehead] “HEAL!” and, no, I will not slap his knee! Such rude thoughts.

    Get well soon, Master.

  48. Akira MacKenzie says

    Until then, I’m stuck in a bed with needles stuck in me, and they’re pumping me full of antibiotics and morphine and a whole bunch of good happy drugs. I’m already feeling blissful and sleepy.

    Back in January, my gallbladder went on me. It hurt, a lot! Normally, they would have gotten me in and out a day or two, but they kept me around for a few days longer with a string of lame excuses: the surgeon is unavailable today, the anesthesiologist is booked up today, the air exchange system in the OR is out… Since they didn’t know when I going to go under the knife (or rather the vacuum cleaner, the removal was done Laparoscopically) I couldn’t eat or even drink water. I hated every drawn-out minute of it–though not as much as the final bill!.

    But the drugs… the wonderful, wonderful painkillers that took away the constant pain in my gut.If you’ve never been terrible pain you can’t imagine how great it feels to have that pain “turned off” with vial full of Delaudid. It also made me drowsy enough to sleep in those God-awful beds.

    Get well PZ!

  49. numerobis says

    I thought the NFL motto was “come for the knee injury, stay for the traumatic brain injury”. So you’re fine with a bum knee — it’s just a rite of passage!

  50. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    I occurs to me that PZ, wiley ol’ communist that he is, has figured out how to game Obamacare. After all, it’s “From each according to their ability.” but it’s “To each according to their knees.”

  51. azpaul3 says

    #74

    Looking at PZ’s training, experience and skill set, being a player in the NFL would be a waste of his talents. He would be better suited for the front office in recruiting and training the officiating crews.

    It’s gotta be in his CV somewhere. “Evolutionary Development of Zebras.”

    As long as he doesn’t mention the “fish” part he’s got his knee in the door no problem!

  52. ricklongworth says

    I’ve had a sprained knee now for about 5 months. After 4 months I switched from crutches to a cane. 2 weeks ago I use the cane only for long walks. Hopefully in another months the whole nightmare will be over.
    So, you might be in it for the long haul.

  53. Francisco Bacopa says

    At least it happened after the semester was over. I hope it’s mostly sorted out by next semester.

  54. firstcircleofhell says

    saddened to hear this

    best wishes for a speedy and full (or near that) recovery

  55. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Sigh, situation normal at Casa la Pelirroja. I make a salad to go with the planned-over lasagna (commercial, not home made), and go to ask what salad dressing and wine is desired…Asleep….

  56. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Dang, #80 was supposed to posted at the lounge.
    Red onion in the salad PZ….

  57. magistramarla says

    I just had the last in a series of five injections of artificial synovial fluid into my right knee yesterday. It helps a lot with the popping and creaking and will hopefully keep the meniscus from further drying out and tearing.
    I hope that there is a simple fix for your knee PZ.

  58. ricklongworth says

    “I just had the last in a series of five injections…”
    The shoot horses don’t they?

    Actually, my case was not that bad, just long in healing. Five injections over 5 months healing time any day.

  59. Trebuchet says

    Dang, I was on the road and missed this!

    I’ve watched them do the “huge needle into the knee and draw out the fluids” thing on my wife several times now. As well as the “huge needle into the knee and inject some silicon lube” thing, several more times. My own knee, I shattered by falling off a roof, followed by surgery with lots of titanium plates and screws. Guess whose knee works better now. (Hint: It isn’t hers.)

    When I was in the ICU after the fall, they had a LOVELY device which allowed me to push a button and put more morphine into my IV. It had a timer on it to prevent overdoses, but I was always glad to see that the light was on indicating I could have some more. Sadly, I was soon moved to the regular floor where I had to push the button to ask a nurse for it. Sometimes they’d come, sometimes they wouldn’t. And of course, all those opioids did WONDERS for my digestive tract. To the extent that my colon was backed up all the way into my stomach and they had to pump it out through my nose.

    Sorry, TMI?

  60. chigau (違う) says

    Waitaminit
    they were sucking synovial fluid out of PZ but pumping synovial fluid into magistramarla?
    Coincidence?

  61. Menyambal says

    Knee sympathy, PZ.

    I have a walking stick that can be extended up to staff-length. That is nice sometimes, especially when just standing for a while. (I favor sticks with a knob top, rather than a cane with a crook, generally.)

    Please keep posting, no matter how fuzzy you feel, but don’t do a thing if you feel bad.

    Get well at an appropriate time.

  62. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Well PZ, since you aren’t available, back to your buddy Neil Shubin *cues up “your inner fish”*

  63. says

    You have my sympathy. I have had gout in both feet for the past week and the medication isn’t working. When my wife mocked the pain I suggested she should stab herself in the foot to see what it feels like. I have actually been stabbed in the foot and I prefer that to gout.

    As for morphine I discovered that when I had shingles in the mouth of all paces. Bliss.

  64. says

    Morbo is pleased to know that another puny human has injured their knee; it makes it all the easier for his race to take over Earth. Muahahaha! In other news, I hope you feel and get better soon.

  65. Dick the Damned says

    Here’s wishing you a speedy recovery. (Are we allowed to indulge in low-grade supernaturalism here, in these circumstances?)

  66. says

    my dad had chunks of cartilage in his knee that needed to be vacuumed out, they caused a lot of pain for him. I don’t know if that is better or worse than an infection. feel better soon pz!

  67. says

    garydargan:

    You have my sympathy. I have had gout in both feet for the past week and the medication isn’t working. When my wife mocked the pain I suggested she should stab herself in the foot to see what it feels like. I have actually been stabbed in the foot and I prefer that to gout.

    With that as a benchmark, that gives me some idea of how bad gout is. Sorry you’ve got it, and hopefully you’ll get better swiftly.

  68. OldEd says

    Youse guys got it all WRONG!!!

    Youse not supposed to BUY the goat, youse supposed to GET his goat!

    Got it?

    The problem is that his goat probably got left at home, and the docs can’t do the really efficatious thing and drive it into the wilderness – in the back of a pick-up truck, preferably.

  69. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    I tried, but now I must bow to the master.

    [doffs hat to Lofty]

  70. says

    Do yourself a favor: try to minimize the use of the pain drugs. They don’t really stop the pain, just make you not care so much about it. And, in my experience, they can actually delay your recovery by making you less steady on your feet.

    Isn’t that the point?

    Personally, I’d recommend marijuana, but I don’t know the laws in Minnesota.

    Hope it turns out fine, PZ. I’d regale everyone about my left knee, but then I’m only 27 and the problem isn’t anything that can’t be fixed with a brace and some OTC aspirin, so…

    Feel better.

  71. Moggie says

    Menyambal:

    I have a walking stick that can be extended up to staff-length. That is nice sometimes, especially when just standing for a while. (I favor sticks with a knob top, rather than a cane with a crook, generally.)

    Wait. Your staff has a knob on the end? Are you a wizard?

  72. says

    Knees are pretty much the best argument against intelligent design (at least at the hands of a loving god) that there could be.

    On the plus side, the last 24 hours on the internet probably call for the soothing pharmaceuticals they have you on now.

    Hope things resolve as well and swiftly as they can!

  73. says

    It sounds more like you had a football career and this is simply the lingering aftermath that keeps reminding you of all your youthful injuries. Most of the halt and lame that I know are able to blame their old football injuries.

    Have you checked to make sure your knee isn’t demon possessed? Perhaps an exorcism is indicated. On the other hand, this could be a sign that imprecatory prayer works and all those “good” Christians who beg god to smite you down are finally getting through.

  74. says

    Nate:

    Personally, I’d recommend marijuana, but I don’t know the laws in Minnesota.

    Probably the same as Florida…stupid state (for many reasons)

    ****
    Moggie:

    Wait. Your staff has a knob on the end?

    Did you deliberately leave that one wide open?

  75. dianne says

    Ouch! Hope you feel better soon and that it’s something benign and easily fixable! I know I shouldn’t do this, but has anyone looked for crystals in the synovial fluid? Pseudogout should be on the differential. Gout too, but it doesn’t usually present first in the knee.

  76. dianne says

    Knees are pretty much the best argument against intelligent design (at least at the hands of a loving god) that there could be.

    Well, at the very least against a competent and loving designer. Knees are no worse than, say, some Microsoft products and they’re designed. (And yes, I’m just being a jerk.)

  77. Alex Yartsev says

    Respected Sir.

    In this time of extreme synovial unpleasantness, I would like to offer you a non – therapeutic secular prayer. May the power of coffee act usefully to enhance the judgement of your orthopedic specialist. May your opiates interact purposefully with your mu-receptors, and politely avoid the nausea centres. May your PCA pump be filled with liquid giggles. May your antibiotics be broad of spectrum, and may their concentration be forever well above the relevant MIC. May their antimicrobial wrath smite down the proteoglycan envelopes of your enemies, and lay to waste their filthy colonies.

    These brief words are offered on the behalf of all us cold reptilian morlocks who watch your organs while you sleep.

  78. throwaway, never proofreads, every post a gamble says

    I did something to my knee as well. No (consistent) insurance so I can’t find out what that something was. Or what a solution is. Fuck surgery, though. All I ever hear is how much worse it makes things.

  79. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Fuck surgery, though. All I ever hear is how much worse it makes things.

    Fuck confirmation bias and hasty generalisation. Without surgery, as difficult as it was, my severed patella tendon would have crippled me for life.

  80. says

    Well, I’ve had a night of painful sleeplessness. How about you?

    I’ve got another weird symptom that has the doctors baffled: really low blood pressure. 70/40. I expect House to show up any minute, announce that this makes no sense, and diagnose me with lupus. Which will be wrong, of course, and 40 minutes later he’ll figure out the real problem, and cure me with one single simple treatment.

  81. Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    That’s my night, too, PZ. Though I don’t have the dangerously low bp.

    Good luck with the House plan. It’s definitely more likely to work your cure than Benny Hinn.

  82. Louis says

    Get well soon, PZ. Here’s hoping that whatever it is is minor and correctable.

    Now, have you considered homoeopathy? What you do is you take a good knee joint from someone else, grind it up, dilute it, do a magic shake, dilute it, magic shake, repeat a dozen or so times (or more, for extra superness) and then ingest it or rub on your knee or use it in ink and fax a homily written in that ink to yourself. It’s bound to work.

    I have a list of people whose knees I could suggest…

    Louis

  83. bytee says

    PZ, My sympathy to you. I had a full reconstruction many years ago. The process can be slow but knee injuries do heal over time.

  84. says

    When I had my ACL done the surgeon (possibly) joked that knees were designed for lying down in a darkened room.
    Good luck, and enjoy those drugs!

  85. dianne says

    I’ve got another weird symptom that has the doctors baffled: really low blood pressure. 70/40.

    Does your room have a TV? Does it get Fox News? You should be able to bring your BP up nicely with it if so.

  86. twas brillig (stevem) says

    re @120:

    have you considered homoeopathy? What you do is you take a good knee joint from someone else, grind it up, dilute it [repeat, repeat, …]

    Umm, to refresh my homeopathy voodoo; I thought homeopathy operated on the principle of “like cures like”, so to cure a bad knee, you’d ingest the sufficiently diluted memory water of bad knee fluid. EG if snake bitten, homeopathic curative is very dilute venom, etc. etc. I know I could look this up on a homeo-wiki or sumthin, but I’m too lazy, much easier to burden this blog with my ignorance, demanding to be edumacated ^_^
    .
    Seriously: Cheers PZ, humor is the best medicine, hang in there, hold on. We (ie me) really want you.

  87. twas brillig (stevem) says

    @124:
    blockquote fail. the subblock was intended to be the outer part, but forgot the / so I ended up sub-blockquoting instead of terminating blockquote.
    Too early… still sleepin…

  88. Louis says

    Twas Brillig,

    You’re actually right (Doctrine of Similars, and all that). I just don’t know anyone with a bad knee I want making worse. Frankly this is just an excuse to kneecap a homoeopath.

    Louis

  89. hillaryrettig says

    Someone already beat me to the “I’m praying for you” joke so I’ll just say to feel better soon and enjoy the pain meds!

  90. Lofty says

    Sleep? Ha. For the last 5 weeks I’ve suffered from the amusingly named Barmah Forest Virus, transmitted from marsupials to humans by mosquitoes. There’s nothing like waking up at 4am when the last painkiller wears off, finding the anti inflammatory cream and slathering the screaming nerves and hoping to survive another day. Knees, thighs, ribs, face, teeth, everything aches. The doctor tells me that although there’s no treatment for it most people get over it in an unspecified number of weeks. I’ve adapted, all I can do, hoping for my body to finally punch the bug into oblivion. Today was the best day since it started, only annoying pain not crippling at the end of the day.
    Hang in there PZ, you’ll get better soon(ish).

  91. Nick Gotts says

    Umm, to refresh my homeopathy voodoo; I thought homeopathy operated on the principle of “like cures like”, so to cure a bad knee, you’d ingest the sufficiently diluted memory water of bad knee fluid. EG if snake bitten – Louis@120

    Snakes have homeopathic knees (i.e., not a single molecule of knee remains in the snake), so surely, according to homeopathic doctrine, being bitten by a snake should cure a bad knee.

  92. karmacat says

    It is possible the low blood pressure is due to the medications, although unlikely from morphine. I am sure your doctors will figure it out. Hope you feel better soon

  93. Jackie the wacky says

    Sorry to hear you’re knee is tormenting you. I hope you feel much better soon.

  94. ledasmom says

    I’ve got another weird symptom that has the doctors baffled: really low blood pressure. 70/40

    Well, I’m going to assume you’re not giving birth with an epidural, which is what I was doing when my blood pressure dropped (technically, I had just given birth. Possibly I was still working on the placenta). So I suppose my personal experience isn’t actually too useful here.

  95. Anthony K says

    I expect House to show up any minute, announce that this makes no sense, and diagnose me with lupus.

    In my day, it was Matthew Modine who showed up to diagnose you with lupus and sling a basketball at your head.

  96. Anthony K says

    I’ve got another weird symptom that has the doctors baffled: really low blood pressure.

    Have you achieved some sort of symbiotic relationship with trolls? We can send caesar to your hospital room to bring you back up to normal.

  97. Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought says

    Yay for the drugs and going home tomorrow (with drugs)!

  98. blf says

    I expect House to show up any minute…

    Why? Is there a battered old blue British police callbox lurking nearby?

  99. Anthony K says

    I expect House to show up any minute…

    Why? Is there a battered old blue British police callbox lurking nearby?

    No, PZ’s just high enough to think doctors still made House calls.

  100. Ragutis says

    PZ Myers

    17 July 2014 at 12:13 pm (UTC -5)

    Yay, drugs! Yay, no surgery! Yay, going home tomorrow!

    That is all.

    The drugs, you know.

    Great news! So, did you get Hugh Laurie’s autograph?

  101. JohnnieCanuck says

    Thank goodness for medical plans, eh? Hope yours is a good one without any co-pay pain.

    If you still need to get your BP up, the itemised list of charges aught to do it for you.

  102. magistramarla says

    Infections seem to be going around. I just got back from an emergency dental appointment.
    The tooth under a crown has rotted and given me an infected jaw.
    I have to take antibiotics this weekend and then get the tooth pulled on Monday.
    An implant will need to go in there later, but I’ll wait until after the spinal surgery that I’m scheduled for early next year.
    Growing old is a real bitch.

  103. yubal says

    They give you morphine for joint pain these days?

    #118 pz -it’s never lupus- house

    Also good for you to get out without surgery. I guess we can spare that goat now.

  104. throwaway, never proofreads, every post a gamble says

    FossilFishy:

    Fuck confirmation bias and hasty generalisation. Without surgery, as difficult as it was, my severed patella tendon would have crippled me for life.

    You’re right it’s confirmation bias. I should have been more explicit in what I meant.

    The situation that deters me from surgery: My mom had arthroscopic surgery to debride meniscus that was allegedly the source of her problem. That surgery came and went and the pain increased for her. So another surgery scheduled to see what else was wrong or what else they could do. From what I understand, what they did the second time was drill a small hole to allow marrow/stem cells/blood flow or whatever to assist in healing the meniscus. The pain increased and her mobility decreased afterward. So yes, in my experience, fuck surgery, even minimally invasive surgery, for certain issues (an issue which I likely have.) A severed tendon isn’t really something I was thinking of as far as avoiding surgery for. But for me and my possibly torn meniscus, I’ll take the longer option of physical therapy first.

  105. knowknot says

    Knee issues are the appendicitis-in-the-woods of the joint world.
    Knees suck.
    Pain meds, however, are swell. I have fond memories of extremely painful sinus surgery due to the experience of going from gelatinous weeping mass to being inspired to very happily start a project that turned out quite well, in something like 20 minutes.
    I am also thankful the stuff is not generally available.
    Anyway.
    Pretend we never left the seas for as long as you can, and heal quickly. Please.

  106. says

    Today is a waiting game. The full test results come back later this morning, which will determine whether I go in for surgery or not (I’m hoping not). If not, I get to go home later today. But just in case, I’m being treated as if I’m pre-op — so no food or water.

    Mixed feelings there. The food here is filling, but you know how Minnesota cuisine tends to be on the pale, bland side? Strip all the excitement from that. I got a turkey sandwich on white bread, and asked if there was anything spicier on the menu…so they brought me some mayonnaise.

  107. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    I hear you on the food PZ. I smuggled in a container of cinnamon for oatmeal/toast when the Redhead was in rehab. Very popular with the other guests, and I had to refill it once during her stay.

  108. says

    Aaargh. They just put in a line for IV stuff; first she tried my left hand, and blew out the vein. Then she went for the right, which now has a needle hanging out of it. Hurts to type. Signing out now.

  109. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Hang in their PZ. My knee had me in hospital for a total of five days over two visits and it sucked pretty much the whole time. But the alternative was worse, far worse. Here’s hoping that your current discomfort results in a healthy outcome.

    throwaway. Apologies. I’ve seen more than enough of your posts that I should have given you the benefit of the doubt. The added context makes perfect sense. I had dinner tonight with a doctor friend and he pointed out how lucky I was that I didn’t damage my knee joint for exactly the reasons you listed. The things they can currently do for joint problems are extremely hit and miss.

  110. magistramarla says

    Get well soon PZ.
    I’ve had arthroscopic knee surgery, and it’s not so bad.
    I hope that you are able to have the minimally invasive surgery.
    We’ll all be thinking about you today.

  111. magistramarla says

    Throwaway,
    Like your mom, I had arthroscopic surgery to trim the meniscus and to trim the bone that had disintegrated thanks to osteonecrosis. It was successful, but the surgeon was an asshole.
    He wouldn’t prescribe physical therapy and instead told me to sign up for a gym and lose 20 lbs.
    Three months of pain later, my rheumatologist had some synovial fluid tested and found an infection.
    She put a big injection of antibiotics into that knee, followed by five injections of artificial synovial fluid over five weeks. After that, the knee healed and was fine for a few years.
    Now I’m having those synovial fluid injections again.
    I would have knee surgery again if it becomes necessary, but I would insist on my rheumatologist being involved from beginning to end and I would demand physical therapy (preferably aquatic) after the surgery.
    Any surgeon who wouldn’t meet those requirements would be fired.