May 13 2013

Y’all know what the beads mean

I received a package from New Orleans the other day (thanks, O Sender!) which contained this happy purple octopus and an assortment of bead necklaces.


I am aware of the custom, and I know what I’m obligated to do upon receiving a handful of necklaces…I must expose my breasts. I’m not one to flout tradition, so I gulped down some Southern Comfort (also part of the custom, right?) and have taken the obligate photo. I’ll put it below the fold to spare the sensitive.

Ha! I lied! Atheist, you know. We can do that.

But honestly, aren’t you relieved?


Skip to comment form

  1. 1

    I feel cheated :(

  2. 2
    Argle Bargle

    But honestly, aren’t you relieved?

    I will sleep easily tonight.

  3. 3

    Once again I must drink deep from the bitter fountain of disappointment.

  4. 4

    Pretty far from Mardi Gras season right now, but I’ll take any excuse to party!

  5. 5
    David Utidjian

    PZ has posted a pictures of a chesticle or two before. The pictures were remarkable (and much remarked upon)… but without the beads… that would have been special.

  6. 6
    Shplane, Spess Alium

    Well fuck, you had my hopes up there. Do you know how hard it is to find fuzzy atheist professor porn?

  7. 7

    Gosh, please stop being a tease!

  8. 8

    I have a hypothesis: I think you can usually tell which nyms belong to males by watching the reactions to one of the middle-aged male FTblogger “threatening” to expose themselves with some public nudity (Ed’s done it too.) All the commenters who moan and groan … are guys. Women generally either just keep quiet, or say some variation of oh, do please.

    Men may also say nothing, of course. But my guess is that the overtly horrified reactions only come from the male readers. If this is true, then there could be several explanations. But first we’d have to see if it seems to be true.

  9. 9

    I too recall the time when Prof. Myers posted a pic of his naked torso for all to wonder at.
    I do not recall writing home about it. fwiw.

  10. 10

    That’s … not where those beads are supposed to go …

  11. 11

    Good choice on the Southern Comfort (unless you lied about that too!!!)

  12. 12

    But now you’ve ruined it. By calling attention to it, you’ve influenced what people will write and with only seven comments before yours, we don’t have a big enough sample set to work with.

    At best, we have to go back and mine some earlier instances of male FTB nudity. This case has been tainted and must be excluded from the data set.

  13. 13
    PZ Myers

    I LIED ABOUT EVERYTHING! I’m not going to drink alcohol in the middle of the afternoon, with grading strewn all about me.

    Wait, maybe it would be a good time to start.

  14. 14

    That’s … not where those beads are supposed to go …

    …or the octopus. Or so I’ve heard.

  15. 15

    That’s … not where those beads are supposed to go …

    the fuck are you talking about?*
    exhibit A
    exhibit B

    *never mind, I don’t want to know.

  16. 16

    Lyke X #12 wrote:

    But now you’ve ruined it.

    True, as far as a fair test of a hypothesis. But as a social experiment, it’s still good … ;)

  17. 17

    Oh PZ you are so boring.

    I once accidentally sliced my chest open on the glass while pressing my manboob up against a window, making a similar joke at a Cinco de Mayo party (I was single and childless then, FWIW). Now that’s commitment.

  18. 18

    I was expecting a couple of chicken breasts, with cajun spices, of course.

  19. 19

    Longtime frequenters of Pharyngula recall that PZ has already posted a photo of his nipple and we cannot forget … no matter how hard we try.

  20. 20
    PZ Myers

    I’m always impressed that that long ago event has so effectively seared itself into some people’s memories. When I die, it’s going on my tombstone: “Yeah, you remember that time he exposed his nipple? Yeah, that was awesome.”

  21. 21

    PZ, ahem. I have wanted to do this for years:

    Tits or GTFO.

    I think I need better life goals.


  22. 22

    it’s true: I can’t not see it.

  23. 23


  24. 24

    Actually, I believe upon recieving beads and other trinkets, it is customary to hand over your shitloads of land in trade. Behold! A nation will be born, and you will be shoved off it.

  25. 25

    PZ: I’m always impressed that that long ago event has so effectively seared itself into some people’s memories.

    PZ, what has been seen cannot be unseen. The horror! The horror!

  26. 26

    Am I the only one who didn’t want to see PZ’s chest, yet looked anyway out of grim fascination?

  27. 27

    Just give them Manhattan. I gather that’s the appropriate response.

  28. 28

    Zeno, for me that picture is right up there with the one of Phil Plait posing with a large telescope as his penis.
    I need to do an image search for rainbows and kittens now.

  29. 29

    OMG is that a Yithian on your shirt? 0_0 Where can I get one?

    (the shirt, not the Yithian)

  30. 30
    Ron Sullivan

    I’m with jefferylanam @ 18: Expected to see chicken parts. It occurs to me that I haven’t eaten chicken in the last couple of months, except for the (wonderfully retrometasidewayskindatrue) “dino nugget” I had today at Costco. I think Joe’s got a bit sentimental about the stepchicks.

  31. 31
    Charlie Foxtrot

    Dammit, dashed just as I was planning my perfect novelty t-shirt for the next GAC in Melbourne!

    I could have blown the chest image up to life size, photo-shopped on a Chibi PZ tattoo, printed it on a t-shirt via Cafe Press and I’d have my drinks at the pub with PZ shirt all sorted out.

  32. 32
    PZ Myers

    Will there be a next GAC? And will I be there? Sam Harris has a wee bit of enmity for me, you know, so I wouldn’t count on it.

  33. 33
    chigau (違う)

    So there’s alot of talk about PZ nipples but do I see a link?

  34. 34
    Charlie Foxtrot

    Well, there’s a lot of support for the idea on the AFA forum, but I must admit I haven’t seen any announcements either way on that yet. (I was just assuming they would try to continue to build on the two successes to date)

    And don’t you worry about an invitation, if we have to we’ll smuggle you in tucked inside me pet kangaroo’s pouch, mate! That way you can bounce over all the DEEP RIFTS!

  35. 35
    PZ Myers

    I hope they do, with me or without me!

  36. 36

    Octopus p0rn just isn’t what is used to be…

  37. 37

    Yes PZ:

    TITS OR… /dodges banhammer.. yikes, sorry!

  38. 38
    Thumper: Who Presents Boxes Which Are Not Opened

    =8)-DX, that post gave me a great image of your avatar dodging a gigantic hammer as it comes crashing down out of the heavens, like a boss-fight in an action RPG :) it made me smile.

  39. 39

    Ah yes, I remember it well…boobies are so charming and (dare I say it?) ‘cute’. What weird bodily nodes we mammals have.

    Incidentally, PZ, that’s an interesting subject that needs regurgitating about now (as you had several thousands of cycles ago)…you know, how ‘peculiar’ it is that Big Strong Men have nipples and all that. I would not presume, but in light of recent ‘Man-Power’ gruntings out from under the commodiously moist soil of male privilege that tends to wreck anything to which they whine attachment, methinks such an essay as only you are able to formulate might smack them back rather smartly. (HINT HINT)

    It could really take off…heck, we might consider real balls and whatnot – a sweet suite of posts pointing out biological/anatomical/developmental equipment as well as authentic brain power that forces Big Strong Men to dwell upon the hideous circumstances that unequivocally relates them to what they characteristically love to shun as beneath them.

  40. 40
    John Horstman

    Hmm, it’s actually the first time in my life I’ve ever been tempted to use the phrase, “Tits or GTFO.” (Aww, =8)-DX beat me to it.)

  41. 41

    Louis kicked both yer slowpoke asses.

  42. 42

    Actually, PZ, women bare their breasts to get beads.
    Men drop trou.

    Just sayin’.

Comments have been disabled.