jagtail
November 30th, 2012 by Chris Clarke
Posted in | 19 comments
Previous post: Sneaking this in before Anti-Caturday
jagtail
Evolution, development, and random biological ejaculations from a godless liberal
Evolution, development, and random biological ejaculations from a godless liberal
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 1st, 2012 at 12:37 pm
SECRET JAGUAR PAGE
googling ixchel+midwifery+war reveals:
Ixchel preparing a meal
chigau (無):
December 2nd, 2012 at 2:47 pm
Took me a while.
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 2nd, 2012 at 5:47 pm
Frabjous day!
I bring offerings.
Kitty heaven.
And jaguars enjoy delicious hoatzin, yes? That bird was a mind-fuck for me, and then I read this.
Owlmirror:
December 3rd, 2012 at 6:22 pm
Sekrit jagular shrine, indeed.
Been too busy to Thunderdome (which is currently a bit too thunderdomey). Still catching up, when I noticed the linkless hint.
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 3rd, 2012 at 10:46 pm
Public Enemy Number One!
So is this the thread where we …
wait a minute. Tardigrades are too small to see over pipe symbols, right?
||| Is this where we plan insurrection against the tardigrade? |||
|| I’m confident that you both agree ||
| it can’t happen soon enough. |
Owlmirror:
December 3rd, 2012 at 11:50 pm
||| Being Public Enemy Number 1 is for life |||
||| not just for the Tardigrade Politburo |||
||| Or in other words, |||
||| You would curse my sudden but inevitable betrayal |||
||| As I worked to overthrow the DoublePapacy |||
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 4th, 2012 at 12:21 am
I’m not afeared. Why, I wouldn’t have it any other way. It will be easy enough to smoosh you with my Low Orbit Brontosaurus Cannon.
||| And soon I will commandeer the LOLstar! |||
The LOBC is already trained on you, for I already know where you live. Here, I’ll prove it.
Fact the first: you have noticed recently that your nostrils and perhaps other mucous membranes are feeling a bit drier.
Fact the second: I have been sapping your precious bodily fluids!
Fact the third: that’s the way I work.
Quod erat fucking demonstrandum!
Owlmirror:
December 4th, 2012 at 9:15 am
Pfft.
I have sekret enemy powers that negate all your silly space weapons. I cloud your mind; I blur your vision; I give you delusions of grandeur and throw a banana under your striding jackboot. Your LOBC has a spanner in the works, and the LOLstar has had its dilithium crystals replaced with Folger’s crystals.
Public Enemy Action!
chigau (無):
December 4th, 2012 at 10:16 am
Wait.
What’s going on?
Which side am I on?
What about those other people (who shall Not Be Named)?
Owlmirror:
December 4th, 2012 at 2:43 pm
Answers:
1) No!
2) Interpretive dance.
3) When the score is platypus to lemonade, try to steal home and score a field goal.
4) Mu.
chigau (無):
December 4th, 2012 at 3:14 pm
You mean They™ are *talking about us *behind our *backs?
(*metaphorically)
Chris Clarke:
December 4th, 2012 at 7:45 pm
Sorry I’m late: just wanted to stop by and profess ignorance of this plan.
Owlmirror:
December 4th, 2012 at 11:00 pm
GASP! They™ are?
I am shocked — shocked, I say — to find that there are shenanigans going on!
chigau (無):
December 5th, 2012 at 12:36 am
waitwaitwait
Is it only Chris generating these sekrit threads?
Does PZ know what’s going on?
chigau (無):
December 5th, 2012 at 12:57 am
Do We™ care?
mwahahahaha
*cough*
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 5th, 2012 at 8:45 pm
I hope you washed your
handsarms afterwards. Anyway, that’s only going to cause inflammation. You want to be smooshed by a flaming brontosaurus?||| Yes, which side are you on?? The four of us, and the one or more true gods, are all amniotes. The tardigrade and its near relatives are all horrid monstrosities. Where are your loyalties, chigau? |||
Of course! BTW, if you purchase a degree from my School of Sauropodan Divinity, you can be a bona fide Professor of Ignorance.
Nope. Nightjar pointed out this one too.
+++++
More ἀποκάλυψις!
Did you know that I am only the most recent in a long unbroken line of DoublePopes? It must be true, for it is an obvious corollary of the Doomsday Argument — and Boltzmann Brontosaurusism is an eschatological faith, after all.
The first was Winsor McCay, who was Poped long, long ago in 1912 when [PLACEHOLDER], the founder of our faith, revealed to him the Acts of Gertie.
And now a comic about big cats.
chigau (無):
December 6th, 2012 at 11:02 am
Whichever side gets me the cutest uniform.
and a cyberpistol.
strange gods before me ॐ:
December 8th, 2012 at 3:04 am
I sold my sewing machine. How about empty promises instead?
chigau (無):
December 8th, 2012 at 9:08 am
Ah, empty promises.
Already have a bunch, thanks.