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Aug 21 2012

It’s a Republican-approved rape video!

So it’s OK! (Just remember, it’s mocking apologists for rape, not rape victims, but it may cut a little too close to the bone for more sensitive readers. It’s still not comparable to anything Congressscum Akin might be thinking or saying in total seriousness.)

43 comments

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  1. 1
    Keith Peterson

    Where is America going man…? Maybe it’s time to start drinking again to ease the soul…

  2. 2
    jehk

    @1 Way ahead of you…

  3. 3
    unclefrogy

    that is funny and so sick. Should I be ashamed for laughing?

    uncle frogy

  4. 4
    Badland

    Close to the bone? Jesus. That left me bleeding

  5. 5
    Mike

    You can always count on the Mr. Deity crew to hit the nail straight on the head. This is a classic and even my daughters are laughing their asses off right now. This is right up there with the Get in my Vagina vid from a few months back.

  6. 6
    Menyambal

    What is a woman supposed to do with the rapist’s child once she has given birth? Give it up for adoption? Raise it? Will she be trusted to decide that for herself?

    It is her child, too. Or, it seems, the government’s child—how did conservatives get to that? (When I was a wee lad, I heard about the government’s evil plan to take all children away from their parents and raise them in giant concentration camps (it was literally a playground rumor).) Now they want government to take charge of children the moment Dad comes.

    Why haven’t the defense-of-marriage folks noticed that this no-exceptions business pretty much sends motivations for marriage right out the window, for a certain kind of guy? I mean, a few rounds of rape, and you’ve got a passel of kids and no obligations thereto.

  7. 7
    crocswsocks

    “More sensitive readers?” Do we have those?

  8. 8
    JCfromNC

    I mean, a few rounds of rape, and you’ve got a passel of kids and no obligations thereto.

    Maybe the next step is forced marriage between the rapist and the victim“surprise sex” partner. That’s in the Bibble too, right?

  9. 9
    Crudely Wrott

    There can be no doubt that this is really the God of the bible. He says the same shit as the people who don’t read the bible say.

    Now it becomes clear why they love him so . . . it’s hard for a dirt bound fuck up to beat free celestial back up.

  10. 10
    notinmyname2050

    Brilliant video. I love Mr D. I see f00t is in the comments section warning him that the feminists will go after him. Thus far no-one is rising to the bait, which is good.

  11. 11
    Louis

    OUCH!

    That is a gut punch of a video.

    I think it’s a good bit of rhetoric, not sure about the splash damage, haven’t worked that out yet, but OUCH!

    Louis

  12. 12
    pedantik

    O.M.F.G. The deity is a rapist? That sure puts a new perspective on the virgin birth story.

  13. 13
    Q.E.D

    It’s so awful yet so funny. Debating with myself whether posting this on FB is worth the oh-so predictable gnashing of teeth and howls of outrage from my conservative USian friends.

  14. 14
    schpounts

    ballsy! but Ô funny!

    I love this guy (seriously, watch all the videos from that guy! he’s hilarious! )

  15. 15
  16. 16
    StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    @8. JCfromNC says:

    Maybe the next step is forced marriage between the rapist and the victim“surprise sex” partner. That’s in the Bibble too, right?

    Correct. See :

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFkeKKszXTw

    Betty Bowers Guide to Bible based marriage the 1 minute and 1 secs mark.

  17. 17
    StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    Cat jumped on keyborard at wrong time – that’s Zomsa’s first comment here – Correction 1minute and 17 seconds mark :

    Deuteronmomy 22 :28 : 29 “Then the man that lay with her shall give fifty shekels of silver, and she shallbe his wife.”

    Bible decreed as a rapists punishment – or reward?

  18. 18
    StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    D’oh! Forgot to close bold tag. Sorry. Meant to only bold the 17 there.

  19. 19
    Alethea Kuiper-Belt

    Ouch.

    This whole “legitimate rape” thing has left me far too gobsmacked to frame any response beyond BUUUH WHAAAA HUH?

  20. 20
    dianne

    The deity is a rapist? That sure puts a new perspective on the virgin birth story.

    Isn’t that obvious? IIRC, there is no point at which Mary is asked if she is willing to bear god’s child, she is simply told that she will do so. What else do you call that?

  21. 21
    Menyambal

    Maybe the next step is forced marriage between the rapist and the victim“surprise sex” partner. That’s in the Bibble too, right?

    But what if the rapist has multiple victims? He can’t have more than one wife, can he? I mean, it forbids that in the Bible, right?

    /sarc

    (Are you telling me that if I see some rich girl who is clear out of my league, I don’t have to do a movie’s worth of self-improvement and shenanigans to try to win her? I just need to surprise her with sex? (Will her father keep giving her money after we’re married?))

  22. 22
    ajeffri

    The Fundy Christian Deity is pretty much an asshole. A misogynist, racist asshole.

  23. 23
    David Marjanović

    What is a woman supposed to do with the rapist’s child once she has given birth? Give it up for adoption? Raise it? Will she be trusted to decide that for herself?

    The Republican Party stops caring about you once you’re born.

    IIRC, there is no point at which Mary is asked if she is willing to bear god’s child, she is simply told that she will do so.

    I finally looked it up. She explicitly accepts, but she wasn’t asked. Gabriel just said “shall” all the time.

  24. 24
    megs226

    You’d think that because it was a woman that bore Jeebus that fundies would respect women more.

    Oooh wait but that would kinda make sense.

  25. 25
    sonofrojblake

    Great video, as usual from that team. I did half expect it to end with “Paul”‘s expression changing to something sinister and him dragging his co-presenter off-screen, then reaching back on screen during the product shot to grab the box.

  26. 26
    peterhearn

    When I first heard about the legitimate rape comment I assumed he was trying to exclude the small portion of women who falsely accuse men of rape. Because thats the only thing that could possibly make sense.

    But looking up the quote just now it sounds like hes actually trying to say that the trauma from rape will somehow cause the pregnancy to terminate itself, which isn’t even medically possible.

    It sounds like a religious-inspired justification to say “if the rape made her pregnant its because she enjoyed it too much”. There goes his senate career.

  27. 27
    David Marjanović

    Will her father keep giving her money after we’re married?

    No, because she brought dishonor upon him. Duh.

  28. 28
    jimmauch

    Why should only tthe zygote get all the rights. You know it’s not easy being a sperm swimming in the most important race of my career. It’s time that my rights be protected as well. If you just give me half a chance I too can become a baby.

  29. 29
    TGAP Dad

    I just know that they’ll incur the wrath of Mr. deity for this one!

  30. 30
    Crudely Wrott

    Why should only tthe zygote get all the rights. You know it’s not easy being a sperm swimming in the most important race of my career. It’s time that my rights be protected as well. If you just give me half a chance I too can become a baby.

    Come to think of it, really, why isn’t every sperm as precious as every egg and as sacred as every zygote? Aren’t they all God’s little children too? I mean, each has a given amount of potential just like an embryo has. Seems a shame that boy and girl gametes aren’t accorded the same degree of protection as is an embryo seeing as each is part of life’s continuum since each one is specially created by God and is therefore precious. Until it breaths air, anyway. Then it’s a throwaway item.

    I guess potential is the important quality of life; actuality must just be too messy, too red in tooth and claw, too loud and disruptive to suit God’s sensitivities. Poor thing, God, it must really regret that the physics of its creation makes mirrors inevitable.

  31. 31
    tbtabby

    I hope Daniel Tosh was watching this. THAT is how you develop a humorous viewpoint on rape.

  32. 32
    sonofrojblake

    “why isn’t every sperm as precious as every egg and as sacred as every zygote”

    Erm… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0kJHQpvgB8

  33. 33
    epikt

    ajeffri:

    The Fundy Christian Deity is pretty much an asshole. A misogynist, racist asshole.

    Of course. The fundies constructed their god to be just like them.

     

  34. 34
    Crudely Wrott

    I knew the inevitable would happen*, sonofrojblake. This time you were the vector. ;~)

    *how does he do that?

  35. 35
    Crudely Wrott

    Because this is simultaneously so damned foolish, hilarious, insane and tragic, an article from CNN’s website:
    http://www.cnn.com/2012/08/22/world/akin-international-rape-reaction/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

    This has got to be the archetypal example of open mouth, insert foot. In front of the whole planet.

    What’s that line from an old spiritual song? Ah, yes,

    “Ain’t no hidin’ place down here . . .”

  36. 36
    Crudely Wrott

    In case you didn’t click the link I provided above, I give you this salient quote:

    [Rob] Brooks [from the University of New South Wales] questioned whether Akin was confusing human biology with that of Australian Black Field Crickets, a species for whom forced copulation is impossible.

    “She has to mount him voluntarily and she is unlikely to do so unless he has a sexy song. But once she has mated him and he has attached a bag of his sperm (a spermatophore) to her abdomen, she often chooses to remove it before its entire contents enter her body,” he wrote. “Perhaps this is the kind of thing Todd Akin had in mind?”

    On a more serious note, Brooks wrote: “What strikes me about the anachronistic attitudes of evangelicals and their Republican puppets to abortion, contraception, family planning, female economic empowerment and feminism in general, is just how unambiguously male these attitudes are.

    “An entire political party in one of the most advanced and educated countries on earth has become a caricature of the most basal evolved insecurities about masculinity. They seem terrified of losing control over the means of reproduction and petrified of cuckoldry,” he said.

    [my boldface]

    I concur. There is no other rational choice.

  37. 37
    Alex the Pretty Good

    In a related cartoon: Chuckle-a-Duck about “Legitmate Rape”

  38. 38
    hepsergalgogrrl

    LMAO ! religion never fails to crack me up ;)

  39. 39
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Megs226:

    You’d think that because it was a woman that bore Jeebus that fundies would respect women more.

    Doesn’t follow, because the fundies regard women as simply broodmares. You wouldn’t respect your dishwasher for washing the dishes like it was made it, would you?

    Hepsergalgogrrl:

    LMAO ! religion never fails to crack me up ;)

    I’m glad you get such chuckles out of Republicans slut-shaming rape victims and denying them abortion services.

  40. 40
    Endorkened

    It all seems perfectly logical to me–if anything, I have an inkling of respect for the conservatives who actually own up to the ugliness of their worldview. If souls exist and newly-fertilized eggs are endowed with them, then of course abortion is wrong*, and making exceptions for rape and incest is just blaming an innocent child for the sins of its parent**. After you’re born, though, you’re tainted by original sin***, and will burn in hell for all eternity, so you stop being precious. All makes perfect sense.

    *Not to mention the already well-established truth that it’s also a Chinese Communist plot to undermine the white race on behalf of the Jews, who will use their limitless negro armies to conquer the world and rule it in the name of the Antichrist, Arnold Schwarzenegger. It’s all laid out in the bible, folks–wake up!

    **Or parents, because of COURSE any woman who doesn’t die of shame mid-coitus is really just a slut who secretly wanted it, because she’s a dirty girl, oh, yeah, she’s a filthy, filthy little whore, isn’t she… *fapfapfapfapfap*

    ***”People make babies by having sex, which is gross. And girls are gross, too. And did you know the hole you came out of is right between the peehole and the poohole? Isn’t that gross?!” – Saint Augustine

  41. 41
    Amphiox

    just blaming an innocent child for the sins of its parent

    But, according to the bible, blaming an innocent child for the sins of its parent is perfectly okeydokey.

    In fact, it’s the standard biblical punishment for parental sins.

  42. 42
    Endorkened

    Well, the only part of the Bible they paid any attention to is the part where God kills oodles and oodles of people for being brown, having unapproved sex, or living on land that Jews want.

    Are we sure the Bible isn’t about America?

  43. 43
    allentrees

    Mr. Deity is freakin awesome. I’m so out of the loop that this is the first I’ve heard of these comments. I had to keep clicking links until I found Akin’s comments in their original context. I couldn’t, or didn’t want to, believe that anyone could say such a thing and actually mean it. Well, he said it. And, he meant it. Many peeps have linked this to a larger world view that some seem to have and I couldn’t agree more. Nor could I possibly express how horribly, horribly sad/upsetting that is.

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