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May 16 2012

Episode CCCXXVIII: No remorse

Buried in work…NPH’s fantasies of vengeance seem appropriate right now.

(Episode CCCXXVII: My current favorite poem.)

675 comments

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  1. 501
    theophontes (恶六六六缓步动物)

    @

    password

    I’ll have to push it up to Tuesday, theaphontes is needing help at work and spawnphontes gets back from her travels around Africa tomorrow.

    @ Nutmeg

    *hugs* Good luck. (I am sure you have nothing to worry about. They should feel honoured, damnit!)

    @ Ing

    Awaiting teh beauuutiful pix…

    @ Louis

    Hehe… (Ing: Take notes.)

  2. 502
    A. R

    I’m seriously angry at my immune system right now. It can’t even fight off a little viral infection FFS.

    Also, conga-rats to Nutmeg and Ing!

  3. 503
    SQB

    No, I don’t know why we’re sending someone dressed like this to the Eurovision Song Contest.

    The idea behind it is that she used to play Indian when she was a little girl.

  4. 504
    Lynna, OM

    Ken Bennett works for the Romney campaign. Ken Bennett is mormon. Ken Bennett is a lying weasel. I’m posting about him because most of the coverage of his “it’s not me, it’s my constituents” birther activities leaves out the fact that his brain no longer works right thanks to overexposure to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

    Arizona’s secretary of state said Friday he had asked officials in Hawaii to verify that Barack Obama was born in their state in order for the president’s name to appear on the November ballot in Arizona.

    “Ken Bennett, who is Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney’s campaign co-chairman in Arizona, said he made the request on behalf of a constituent. . . .

    Source is Reuters.

    Bennett wants a mormon President of the US, and is willing to try any dirty trick in the book. This powerful Arizona mormon also played a role in getting a slap-on-the-wrist judgement for his son when he was caught shoving broom handles and flashlights up the rectums of boys at a youth camp, a time-honored tradition, I guess, in mormon-dominated youth groups.

    The son of Arizona’s Senate President [Ken Bennett's position at the time] confessed that he and another counselor shoved broomsticks and flashlights into the rectums of 18 boys in at least 40 incidents at a youth camp in June.

    Now Yavapai County prosecutors say they will drop all but one assault charge and likely recommend little or no jail time if 18-year-old Clifton Bennett agrees to plead guilty. …

    Prosecuting attorney James Landis explained the plea agreement in court, saying the “broomsticking” was a hazing ritual and a punishment, not sexual assault. …

    Public records show that Bennett and Walker were assigned to stay in a cabin with the boys. In the first hours of camp, Bennett and Wheeler announced that campers who broke rules would get a “brooming.” …

    They were punished for flatulence, making messes, not following rules and sometimes for no reason at all, records show. The camp ended in June, but police weren’t notified until six months later, when one of the boys told a school official what happened….

    Bennett’s father, Senate President Ken Bennett, R-Prescott, sat behind his son in court.A Prescott native and influential businessman, he has said little publicly about the case. After his son’s arrest, he issued a brief statement expressing concern as a parent. …

    Mission in jeopardy

    They described Bennett [the son] as an honor student and active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, planning to go on a mission in September. “A felony conviction for assault will make his desire to complete his mission impossible,” they wrote.

    Under the plea agreements Bennett and Wheeler could face a maximum two years in prison. But the court could reduce the charges to a misdemeanor and no jail time….

    http://www.azcentral.com/arizonarepublic/local/articles/0402bennett02.html?&wired

  5. 505
    Lynna, OM

    A Baptist pastor is suing a woman for posting a negative review of the Church. She’s being sued for $500,000. Church members have been told to shun the blogger. Other church members are suing her.

  6. 506
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Busy busy busy Sunday*!

    Mr Darkheart is just about done with the second coat of paint for the nursery. We need to repaint the trim too, but that will have to wait for another day.

    I’ve got roughly 75-80% of a new wheelie kitchen cart assembled. Soon my cookbooks will have a new, out of the way home, yay!

    After we’re both done with our projects, we’re having homemade pizza for lunch. OM NOM NOM.

    *Friday!

  7. 507
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Church members have been told to shun the blogger.

    Hmmm. Didn’t we just have humanape telling us that only Islam shuns people or punishes those who have left the religion or have done something to offend the leaders of a religion? But Christians would never do that, right?

  8. 508
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Busy busy busy Sunday*!
    *Friday!

    Thank you.

  9. 509
    strange gods before me ॐ

    Ah, good ol’ humanape.

    Now banned.

  10. 510
    Part-Time Insomniac

    Congratulations Ing!
    —————————–

    Good luck, Nutmeg. If, as you said, they’ve already guessed, then you coming out won’t be a huge shock.
    —————————–

    The church and the church members suing that woman: I have a huge shipping crate full of decaying porcupines for them. No no, don’t worry about the smell, some of them are just a bit overripe.

    Really, who knew that those sentient hemorrhoids would get their feelings hurt over one review? One! Something you’re hiding from us, sweetums? Can’t think of why you’d jump to file a lawsuit otherwise.

  11. 511
    Lynna, OM

    Didn’t we just have humanape telling us that only Islam shuns people or punishes those who have left the religion or have done something to offend the leaders of a religion? But Christians would never do that, right?

    Right. Mormon leaders claim that their cult members never shun anyone either. (See http://affirmation.org/news_2012/2012_028.shtml for an example.) And yet exmormon.org is chock full of shunning stories, and I have personally seen mormons stop doing business with people who leave what they simply call “The Church.’

    Here are two shunning stories posted just today.

    I went to a Mormon wedding reception yesterday. The old bishop from the ysa ward couldn’t even say hi to me even though he walked right past me three times. It felt really awkward that he couldn’t even acknowledge my presence. As soon as he saw my ex-husband, he had no problem talking to him.

    After the bishop had said hello and said a few words with each person at our table except for me, a couple people made a comment about how rude he was. I outed myself and said that I guess he can’t associate with ex-mormons if he wants to attend the temple.

    Walking through the local grocery store a few weeks ago with my teenage son and we crossed paths with a man from the ward I used to attend. In the past, when I was active, he would always say ‘hi’ and have a big smile.

    This time there was nobody else within 30 feet of us as we walked toward each other. I said ‘Hi’ and smiled. He actually looked to the left and then up toward the ceiling and said nothing.

    My son, who has been with me before when we’ve seen this man, says “Geez, what’s up with him?” I responded, “This is what happens when you don’t attend their church. Welcome to the loving Church of JESUS CHRIST”.

  12. 512
    opposablethumbs

    Yay Ing!!!! More confetti!!!!! And dancing!!!
    .
    .

    I used to eat rhubarb raw as a child. The trick is, have stick of rhubarb (cleaned of course, and with leaves and lumpy end chopped off) and a cup with sugar in it. Dip end of rhubarb into sugar. Bite off crunchy sugared end of rhubarb. Repeat until you have no more rhubarb, or no more sugar.

    Yes! metoometoometoo! (yum) (it was growing at the end of the garden)

  13. 513
    Sili

    Ooh! Ooo! Ooh!

    I saw a genoowhine UFO Thursday night.

    At least I haven’t identified it yet.

    Seriously, though. I have no idea what it was. Never seen something like it.

    Brighter than Venus – much like an Iridium flare. -4 perhaps? But orange like a sodium lamp not white. And not a flare. It lasted for almost a minute. Moved faster than the ISS, so obviously seemed lower as well.

    And there were two of them about a minute apart.

    Annoying.

  14. 514
    Cipher

    Wedding was beautiful. Yay

    Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

    Ah, good ol’ humanape.

    Now banned.

    Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
    Good day to be in TET.

    Can’t even deal with this archaic translation of Plautine comedy. Can’t even deal.

  15. 515
  16. 516
    Ing

    Leaving on honeymoon now. Goal is to pass DC by tonight and finish tomorrow to undisclosed super location bunker happy town!

  17. 517
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Ing: Congratulations. I’m glad you had a beautiful wedding. I hope the honeymoon is just as lovely.

    I’ve been offline for a few days. On Friday, I had a very pleasant, if too-quick, lunch with Esteleth and Walton. I spent much of yesterday combing garage sales.

    There was this one man whose knick-knack table had a large terra cotta rooster on it. The rooster was standing next to a box of rattan balls, labeled “Rattan Balls.” Unfortunately, the vibe I got from the seller was that any joke about him selling his cock and balls at a garage sale would have been, at best, a major faux pas.

    Among the things I scored were a vintage blender for $2, a big bar of high-quality rose-scented soap for $2, some funky lamps and pillows for free, and — best of all — a nearly-new, queen-sized air mattress for $3. And note that the other day I just disposed of my old, twin-sized air mattress, which I bought at a premium many years ago, because it still leaked air after a thorough patching-up.

    Opposable Thumbs:

    I’ve encountered doorstepping proselytisers precisely once in my entire life (I don’t know for sure whether they were morons or seventh-day-ers or some other flavour, as they never got a chance to open their mouths) and the neighbours were amused and delighted that the dog scared them off (I’d just like to add that I emphatically do NOT encourage or approve of this kind of behaviour on the part of the dog).

    GOOD doggie!

    (Yeah, I know… Obviously not good to encourage dogs to be aggressive in general, but I can’t say I feel bad if a couple of fundie doorbangers shit their pants in fear.)

    Attitudes to being gay, on the other hand, vary enormously.

    That couple who owned the bed & breakfast, who were sued for not being willing to let to a gay couple? I was hoping they were in the minority, and the assholes commenting on The Guardian and Daily Fail were the usual loudmouths.

    Birger, aside from what LILAPWL said at #236, Arizona is California’s white-flight suburb.

    Regarding BBQ, I miss a certain late friend of mine who used to update his LiveJournal with things like, “My meat has been rubbed and smoked, and now it is resting.” Also, for those living in or visiting Boston who want good BBQ, if you like the North Carolina kind, I have to recommend the Blue Ribbon in Arlington and West Newton.

    Anyone who needs a powerful emetic is welcome to check out the Photoshop adorning the cover of the current Boston Phoenix. That, people, is Obamabottery at its absolute nadir.

    SQB, re Joan Franka: Damn, that’s some serious hipster racism going on there.

    Bannination of Human Asshole: YAY!

  18. 518
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Also a friend sent me this story about Phyllis Schafly bemoaning the births of people of color in the U.S.

    Me: “Why won’t she die already?”

    Him: “Because nobody’s crossed the Desert of Doom, found the iron box her heart is kept in, and stabbed it with the Blessed Dagger of Destruction to stop the foul, black thing from beating?”

  19. 519
    carlie

    Busy here, too. Weeded the side garden* of the rampant mint, got the lobelias and dahlias I bought last week squeezed into the front yard planter amongst the still-lush bulb foliage, and got the tomatoes put into pots. I’m a little worried that I moved them too fast, because they’re wee little things and are looking quite droopy now. Hoping they survive. And, of course, I picked the hottest day of the year so far to do it all.

    *”garden” meaning simply “strip along the garage where I planted some perennials that fend for themselves”

  20. 520
    Sili

    @Sili, Chinese lanterns

    That would explain the colour, yes. But they would need to have been very near for them to move that fast.

  21. 521
    SQB

    But they would need to have been very near for them to move that fast.

    Strong winds?

  22. 522
    opposablethumbs

    Ms Daisy Cutter

    GOOD doggie!

    She’s fine with people she knows – but we know she’s nervous of strangers (rescue dog, unknown past). I had her downstairs in the garden with me precisely to socialise her a bit with the neighbours (there were three of us hanging around the front door of the building chatting) and she was wearing a muzzle as an extra precaution. So I knew she couldn’t do anyone any harm; the 7th-day-mormon-witnesses or whatever they were came up the garden path and she just barked at them a lot. Ideally I don’t want her to do that at all, but we were all very happy to see the back of them. I was just grateful that the neighbours were witnesses to the fact that she was muzzled, so no-one could claim to have been bitten; dogs can get put down if someone complains, even though they came onto our property uninvited and had no legitimate reason for being there.

  23. 523
    strange gods before me ॐ

    the 7th-day-mormon-witnesses

    :)

    Jehovah’s Seventh Day Saints!

  24. 524
    kristinc, now with added ventilation

    Hey, my kids have the Tromso in white, and made up with cheerful quilts it really isn’t prison-like at all. Of course, I favor clean modern lines a lot of the time.

  25. 525
    Nutmeg

    Thanks to John Morales, Giliell, Alethea, opposablethumbs, carlie, Audley, theophontes, A.R, and PTI for the well-wishes. I just got back from a day in the field and saw all of your comments. *brownies* and *lemonade* for all of you!

    SQB:

    You think you could post an anonymized version of that somewhere?
    Also, how did you draw it? Free hand, with a template or on a comupter?

    It was free-hand. I’m not sure flow-chart is exactly the right word – more like an “expected path of information flow diagram”. With stages of information dispersal, and things that need to happen for those stages to be okay, and lots of arrows. I’m not sure it would really be useful/entertaining to anyone but me, but I’ll take another look at it.

    I grew up in a small town, so I always think about information control. Although I recognize that “three can keep a secret, if two are dead”, and I’m prepared for the possibility that people may find out before I really wanted them to.

    Ing:

    Wedding was beautiful. Yay

    Congrats and best wishes for the future!

  26. 526
    cm's changeable moniker (quaint, if not charming)

    Doctor, doctor joke.

    “Aromatherapist, aromatherapist, my dog’s got no nose …”

    “That’s OK, I’m sure I can help you with that.”

    Dave Gorman, via

    Support Simon Singh, via

    Jack of Kent:

    There is going to be a defamation bill and this means that there is going to be statutory reform of the law of libel. And such statutory intervention means reform more fundamental than can be done by the courts by themselves.

    It my even be possible that the law of defamation can be re-cast for modern times. [...]

    Success has many parents, but the publication of the bill – and current campaign for libel reform – surely has its origin in the defiance of Dr Simon Singh in respect of the illiberal and misconceived libel claim brought in 2008 by the (now discredited) British Chiropractic Association.

    And that defiance in turn was aided and abetted by a worldwide network of bloggers and science geeks who got behind Simon from the very start of the claim.

  27. 527
    kristinc, now with added ventilation

    Sigh. I deeply underestimated the tediosity* of tying a 150-some-square quilt.

    *cromulent. Yes, it is.

  28. 528
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    Nutmeg, good luck. *hugs*

    Ing, I’m glad the wedding went well. Congratulations!

    Ms. Daisy Cutter:

    Him: “Because nobody’s crossed the Desert of Doom, found the iron box her heart is kept in, and stabbed it with the Blessed Dagger of Destruction to stop the foul, black thing from beating?”

    ♥ ♥ ♥ I have often wondered why she is still with us; now we have an answer.

  29. 529
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Hekuni Cat, I suspect many people remain with us for just that reason.

  30. 530
    consciousness razor

    Damn, I just found out Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau died on Friday. He was 86.

    In memoriam, an old, angry song from Dichterliebe. I’ve always loved the ending.

  31. 531
    Part-Time Insomniac

    Him: “Because nobody’s crossed the Desert of Doom, found the iron box her heart is kept in, and stabbed it with the Blessed Dagger of Destruction to stop the foul, black thing from beating?”

    If someone did, would they get a prize?

  32. 532
  33. 533
    carlie

    If someone did, would they get a prize?

    Thank you Mario! But our princess is in another castle!

  34. 534
    cicely

    Nutmeg, best of good luck in your coming out to your friends.
    *big hug*
    -

    One of my former coworkers had a habit of interrupting me and talking over me whenever we were in meatings. Now, he was mostly deaf, so he may not have been aware he was doing it. But it was, to say the least, quite annoying. That coworker is now gone and has been for almost a year. Another coworker has, in the past three months, taken up the exact same habit. Aaaaaargh!

    He’s possessed!.
    -

    Wedding was beautiful. Yay

    *champagne&fireworks*
    -
    Robin Gibb is dead.
    -

    Prosecuting attorney James Landis explained the plea agreement in court, saying the “broomsticking” was a hazing ritual and a punishment, not sexual assault. …

    Wrongo. It was a hazing ritual and sexual assault.
    -

    Me: “Why won’t she die already?”
    Him: “Because nobody’s crossed the Desert of Doom, found the iron box her heart is kept in, and stabbed it with the Blessed Dagger of Destruction to stop the foul, black thing from beating?”

    A Quest!
    -

  35. 535
    carlie

    Blargh. A slimepit resident is trying to diss SallyStrange over at Jen’s place, in case anybody’s got their idiot-smacking gloves on.

  36. 536
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    To complement Consciousness Razor’s high-culture hyperlinks, I present the following without comment, as it needs none.

    The Rampaging Fuckers of Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet of the Vomit Atmosphere is a collection of three short novels by a master of satire. Mykle Hansen’s subversive tales capture the smugness of mainstream culture. He thrusts his characters into absurd and humorous situations that reveal the defects in the modern social fabric. With the wit of Christopher Moore, the inventiveness of Terry Gilliam and the rudeness of South Park, Hansen’s surreal fiction is ridiculously fun to read. Three Bizarro Novels: MONSTER COCKS: A poignant tragedy of penis enlargement gone horribly wrong. JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF AGNES CUDDLEBOTTOM: A gripping history of the first Starbucks in the anus of an 80-year-old prostitute. CRAZY SHITTING PLANET: A touching parable of love, friendship, and feces.

  37. 537
    carlie

    It’s really creepy and sad to think that slimepit residents still read Pharyngula voraciously, waiting and watching for any comment that can look bad out of context, and then bookmark it for later use. Really sad.

  38. 538
    Rey Fox

    Once again, I link to this stirring tribute to Phyllis Schlafley, Antonin Scalia, and many others.

    Congrats to Ing and Nutmeg and whoever else has accomplished neat things lately.

  39. 539
    strange gods before me ॐ

    It makes me want to undelete Phil’s wiki page.

  40. 540
    consciousness razor

    Daisy, it’s a good thing our comments aren’t closer together. They would probably annihilate one another. ;)

  41. 541
    strange gods before me ॐ

    The Rampaging Fuckers of Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet of the Vomit Atmosphere

    I note many reviewers say Amazon recommended it to them because they bought Christopher Moore, and they hated it, saying don’t buy it if you like Christopher Moore.

    I wanted to like Christopher Moore but it turned out I hate him and I hope he is eaten by a very boring demon. I can imagine his writing would be much improved, though, with more shitting.

    So should I read this book?

  42. 542
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    Ah, good ol’ humanape.

    Now banned.

    Applause. Another arrogant and ignorant liberturd not realizing we don’t give a shit about its arrogant and ignorant opinions. They appear to always need a clue-by-four, but it never gets their attention due to the solid calcium hydroxyphosphate cranium.

  43. 543
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    CR, you’re probably correct. :)

    SGBM, I haven’t read Christopher Moore, so I can’t comment one way or the other on his writing. I haven’t read Rampaging Fuckers, either, so I can’t comment on its literary virtues. Perhaps you should order it, read it, and write a book review for our edification.

  44. 544
    strange gods before me ॐ

    I haven’t read Rampaging Fuckers, either, so I can’t comment on its literary virtues.

    Ah, I see. For fiction these days I rely mostly on word of mouth. I don’t want to be the guinea pig. :)

  45. 545
    Ing

    Aaaaaand mysterious repair alarm to ny cars hybrid systems means were in MD staying till I can take it to a dealer in am. Fml not gonna get to bunker till Tuesday now :(

    Fuck this being nude ans watching myth busters

  46. 546
  47. 547
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    This weekend I saw something encouraging with the Redhead. She was able twitch her index and middle fingers on her left hand at her will both days after her splint sessions. Baby steps I keep saying…

  48. 548
    cicely

    Ing, I spent my wedding night at my folks’ house…on a roll-away bed that was backed up against the wall to their bedroom…with their bed backed up against the wall on the other side.

    Nothing at all happened that night.

    (Stupid u-joint….)
    -

  49. 549
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Nerd:

    Good news.

    When recovering from an injury, it is amazing how big a small thing can be.

  50. 550
    Nutmeg

    That’s good, Nerd. Here’s hoping for more progress soon.

  51. 551
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    Good news, Nerd. I’m very happy to hear it.

  52. 552
    Pteryxx

    Thanks for telling us, Nerd. Good news, and I for one needed the reminder of small golden things.

  53. 553
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    Pteryxx:

    I for one needed the reminder of small golden things.

    I did too.

  54. 554
    Amblebury

    Hey Nerd, I don’t know you too well at all, but I’m very glad to hear of the Redhead’s progress.

  55. 555
    ibyea

    I won’t have to read humanape’s stupid comments anymore. That’s nice.

  56. 556
    SQB

    Rampaging Fuckers is now on my wishlist, based on the title alone.

  57. 557
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    John Greg said:

    As ever julie,…

    He was talking to julian. No, we’re totally not misogynists, yet if we want to insult a guy, let’s turn his nym into a woman’s name…

  58. 558
    opposablethumbs

    Thank you for the good news, Nerd.

    Got some not-so-good news the other day – a friend (in his early 70s) suddenly got double vision while driving on the motorway. Ophthalmologist has referred him to a neurologist. He says it’s pretty frightening :(
    He can see normally with one eye at a time, just not both at once – so he’s wearing an eyepatch for now, meaning no depth perception of course. Makes it hard to walk in the countryside with the dogs, which is his greatest pleasure, so he’s staggering around with a big stick, sort of seeing the funny side. One verdict was “well if it’s not the drink and it’s not the diabetes making you go blind it must be the masturbation” (friend fell about laughing).

  59. 559
    carlie

    So sorry, Ing. We stayed in a local hotel the night of the wedding and were driving out of the parking lot the next morning to go forth to the honeymoon, when we promptly got a flat tire and then spent the whole day at my parents’ house trying to find somewhere that would sell us a tire on a Sunday. (this was back in the day when everything was closed on Sunday)

  60. 560
    carlie

    That is good news, Nerd!

    Sorry about the friend, opposeablethumbs – I hope his doctors can figure it out quickly.

  61. 561
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    Argh, I just spent an hour to turn three expensive needles and a t-shirt into some broken metal and fabric scrabs.

    opposablethumbs
    Sorry about your friend. I hope they can figure out quickly what it is.

  62. 562
    SQB

    Argh, I just spent an hour to turn three expensive needles and a t-shirt into some broken metal and fabric scrabs.

    Sounds like Art to me!

  63. 563
    birgerjohansson

    “Source found for missing water in sea-level rise” http://www.nature.com/news/source-found-for-missing-water-in-sea-level-rise-1.10676
    We screw up nature in many and varied ways….

    If I add up correctly, the rise is 1.8 mm per year. One inch in 13-14 years. It may not sound like much but you will see ugly results in a generaton.

  64. 564
    John Morales

    birgerjohansson:

    We screw up nature in many and varied ways….

    We are part of nature, no?

    (The biggest screw-up of all was the poisoning of the atmosphere with elemental oxygen, around two and a half billion years ago)

  65. 565
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Aw, jeez, Ing. I’m sorry.

    Nerd, great news about the Redhead.

    SQB, whenever you manage to acquire and read it, please share your opinion with us. I’m inclined to do the same, myself, but I have so damn many unread books around here and so many expenses that I tend to shy away from new book purchases.

    Giliell: I caught that, too. John Greg is an oozing pilonidal cyst in the ass crack of FTB.

    Opposable Thumbs, I hope your friend’s double vision resolves soon and isn’t a sign of anything worse.

    John, you write as if it were entirely impossible to screw up something one is a part of.

  66. 566
    ImaginesABeach

    Threadrupt.

    I took my Girl Scouts to look for fossils on Saturday. This is not something I know much about, but it’s what they wanted to do. Interesting that I have had several girls join my troop because they wanted to do something more fun than sit around doing crafts, while Mattir is getting frowny faces from leaders who think crafts are important. My girls are in 7th grade, and for every girl I lose to soccer, I add one from a troop that does lots of crafts.

  67. 567
    John Morales

    John, you write as if it were entirely impossible to screw up something one is a part of.

    Does it seem so? I thought my parenthetical was sufficiently clarificatory.

    Perhaps I should rephrase, then: We are making planetary conditions less amenable to our future flourishing by our short-sighted actions, but to imagine we are “screwing up” nature is an anthropocentric conceit.

  68. 568
    birgerjohansson

    Kids liking fossil hunt; -There is hope for the next generation.

    IAB, You are not “losing” them to soccer, or rather, your loss is soccer’s gain :-)
    Recommended film: “Bend it like Beckham”
    — — — — — — — —
    John Morales; Yes, I get it.
    Unfortunately the changes will be unappealing for primates. I am reminded of a quote from Pratchett:
    “While evolution requires thousands of generations of back-breaking trial and error to give a species moral fibre (and, in some cases, backbone), from the point of view of the individual evolution can be a total pig. Or at least a small pink reptile that one day might evolve into a pig.”

  69. 569
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Crappy morning.

    One of my cats is missing. We tore apart our apartment looking for her, but she isn’t anywhere. We checked outside (in case she wriggled out of the hole in the screen in our bathroom window), but she isn’t in the courtyard or underneath the porch.

    I had to go into work before I could find her. I don’t know what to do.

  70. 570
    John Morales

    No worries, Birger.

    (BTW, I often follow your links, they’re generally worthwhile; so thanks for that)

  71. 571
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Good morning. Happy Saturday.

    Or at least it was until I read Joey’s latest comment. Xe scares me.

  72. 572
    John Morales

    Audley, I know the feeling. It’s horrible.

    I don’t really know your circumstances, but if by tomorrow the situation remains, perhaps some posters in your locality may help.

    Best wishes.

    (With cats, hope remains for at least several days.

    One of my sisters had hers go missing for 6 days, and about the time she’d given up hope it turned up)

  73. 573
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, John.

    I’m taking tomorrow off from work (doctor’s appointment), so if we can’t find her by tonight, we’ll be able to look for her/put up posters.

    I’ve already contacted a few of my neighbors this morning and they’re on the look out for her.

    Poor Pickles.

  74. 574
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Damn.

    Sorry about the cat, Audley. A missing pet/part of the family is really tough. I hope the fuzzball shows up.

  75. 575
    opposablethumbs

    Thank you for the good wishes, Carlie, Giliell and Ms Daisy Cutter – we’re keeping our fingers crossed waiting to hear what the neurologist has to say. My friend is kidding on a lot about looking like a pirate with his eye-patch, but I think he’s quite frightened underneath it all (I know I would be).

    Hope cat is back soon Audley :( Chances must presumably be fairly high that it has gone walkabout and well-meaning people in the neighbourhood will likely be feeding it. Does it wear a collar/name-tag?

  76. 576
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    Our old cat used to disappear for a day or two occasionally. It would even get itself locked in the attic while it explored the dirt and dust. Hope the cat returns in short order.

  77. 577
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, Oggie and opposablethumbs.

    No, she doesn’t wear a tag ‘cos she’s exclusively an indoor cat, she’s also not chipped. I’m kicking myself for that right now, trust me.

  78. 578
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, Nerd.

    Really, I’m hoping Pickles is just in a crawl space or asleep in a closet or something.

  79. 579
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Really, I’m hoping Pickles is just in a crawl space or asleep in a closet or something.

    We’ve had a couple of times when we thought a cat was missing. It turned out, in all but one case, that the cats know the house far better than we do.

  80. 580
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Oggie,
    Yeah, I wouldn’t be surprised if she found a little cubby hole that we don’t know about– our apartment is the top two floors of a 200 year old house, so there’s plenty of hiding spots.

    That’s what I’m hoping anyway. The alternative is that she jumped out of a third floor window and could be injured somewhere and I just don’t want to think about that.

  81. 581
    Nutmeg

    *hugs* to Audley. I hope you find your cat healthy and safe soon.

  82. 582
    Ing

    Tech found nothing wrong wt car…changing oil and forging on.

  83. 583
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, Nutmeg.

  84. 584
    Lynna, OM

    A measure of how much female shoulders frighten mormon men:

    Mormons alter Bloch’s angels so they’re wingless and not sleeveless

    Mormon officials clearly love the religious paintings of 19th-century Danish artist, Carl Heinrich Bloch. Prints of his Jesus images are everywhere in Mormondom – on meetinghouse walls, in member homes and in official publications.

    In 2010-11, LDS Church-owned Brigham Young University staged an exhibit of Bloch’s giant altar paintings.

    Bloch’s work is, however, theologically touchy for Mormons in at least one element – angels.

    During the exhibit, curators acknowledged sheepishly that sometimes in the past the Utah-based church had airbrushed out angel wings on Bloch reproductions, reflecting the Mormon view that angels are resurrected humans, not some kind of flying creatures.

    Well, now the church has added an even more contemporary concern – modesty.

    In its December 2011 Ensign, the church’s official magazine, the female angels in Bloch’s painting are wingless and have cap sleeves on their shoulders.

    The blog dovesandserpents spotted the deletions and additions.

    “I feel like someone has hijacked my religious train car and steered it right off the rails,” wrote Heather, who posted the piece. “We’re so concerned with modesty that we have now taken to modifying a beautiful piece of artwork (originally painted in 1873) before publishing it in our official church magazine so that it reflects our hyper-vigilance with regard to modesty?”

    On top of that, she wondered, why didn’t they cover up the resurrected Jesus’ nipple? The off-the-shoulder look doesn’t meet Mormon men’s dress code, either.

    The LDS Church declined to comment to The Salt Lake Tribune.

  85. 585
    Lynna, OM

    Best possible outcome is wished for Audley and family.

  86. 586
    AJ Milne

    Re shunning, upthread:

    I’m having modest difficulty wrapping my head around just how incredibly clueless you’d have to be to claim the shunning is somehow unique to a single ‘other’ religion you happen to dislike.

    Modest, only. I mean, sure, people see (or remember of classify) what they want ‘n all. I do get that.

    Still… How do you not notice that one and still manage to navigate the world? Wouldn’t you trip over stuff, what with having to have both eyes closed so tightly?

    (/Sorta more seriously: hell, shunning isn’t even unique to religious sects. Some of ‘em just happen to be particularly/memorably good at it, is all.)

  87. 587
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Shit, Audley. I hope Pickles turns up safe before long.

    Awesome news, Ing.

    In other news, yet another internet misogynist hoists himself with his own petard.

  88. 588
    Pteryxx

    Argh. Random bad news alert via BB: an attempt to legalize propaganda within the US.

    Buzzfeed’s Michael Hastings reports on a revision to the Smith-Mundt Act of 1948 and Foreign Relations Authorization Act in 1987, which prohibit the use of government disinformation and propaganda campaigns within the USA. The amendment, sponsored by Rep. Mac Thornberry from Texas and Rep. Adam Smith from Washington State, would allow the US government to knowingly tell lies to its people in order to promote the government’s own policies.

    http://boingboing.net/2012/05/21/proposed-us-law-makes-domestic.html

    Citing:

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/mhastings/congressmen-seek-to-lift-propaganda-ban

  89. 589
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, Lynna and Daisy.

    My mom just called me. She looked all around my building and under the porches and stairs and everything, no dice. She also walked down the street and talked to some of my neighbors so they know that Pickles is a runaway kitteh. Nobody has seen a strange cat.

    I’m starting to really get hopeful that Pickles is just stuck in a closet or in a wall or something.

  90. 590
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Also, thanks for the chuckle, Daisy. From the comments in your linky:

    He’s an entire asshole universe unto himself. Clouded in bean gas.

    :D

  91. 591
    RichardAustin

    Pteryxx:

    The NDAA is likely to get vetoed anyway (they’re playing games with defense spending and the Prez is having none of it), so I doubt it’ll be made into law. But, seriously, this is getting ridiculous.

  92. 592
    David Marjanović

    If anyone is going to the conference in Cologne this weekend and has 2 or 3 places for someone to sleep, please tell me ASAP. There’s one hostel that hasn’t replied yet (I’ve written to them twice now; let’s hope I’ll get a reply tomorrow), and apart from that the entire city is booked out for that weekend all the way to… a hotel with bearable prices that is located quite far out but next to a subway station… but still.

  93. 593
    Grumps

    Related to nothing. I’m a Tim Minchin fan but had not found this one until today. Not atheistic or anything, but my god that boy can play! If you don’t click on the following link you will have made your life a little less enjoyable than it could have been.

  94. 594
    slignot

    Oh no, Pickles!

  95. 595
    Ing

    Did not draw Mohamid but did draw Slenderman, Gollum, and Jack Skellington while waited for car to be diagnosed.

  96. 596
    ibyea

    Wow, in South Korea, thanks to the stupidity of some monks, they are now talking about taxing religious institutions. Thanks, corrupt religious leaders!

    Link: http://www.aljazeera.com/video/asia/2012/05/201252034915372674.html

  97. 597
  98. 598
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    opposablethumbs, I hope your friend gets a diagnosis soon. That has to be very frightening.

    ImaginesABeach:

    I took my Girl Scouts to look for fossils on Saturday.

    This is an opportunity I would have loved to have had as a Girl Scout. But that was a very long time ago.

    Audley, that’s horrible. Best of luck in finding Pickles.

    I once thought I had lost both of my cats while I was in the process of moving. Everything was out of the apartment, and I couldn’t find them. I was going insane when I remembered the window behind the shower curtain in the bathroom. Both of them had been hiding on the large window ledge.

  99. 599
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    AMAZING photo from the Chicago protests.

  100. 600
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    Also: Iraq and Afghanistan vets hurl their medals in the direction of the NATO summit.

    One of them was Scott Olsen:

    These medals, once upon a time, made me feel good about what I was doing. They made me feel like I was doing the right thing. But I came back to reality and I don’t want these any more.

  101. 601
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    Good evening
    Audley
    Shit, best wishes for Pickles, may you find hir soon.

    +++++
    Argh, more shit. My friend’s mum who has pancreatic cancer has caught pneumonia. Plus some resistant hospital bug, which fortunately hasn’t broken out yet but is clearly present in her system.
    Hope they get her out of hospital again…

  102. 602
    opposablethumbs

    Thank you Hekuni Cat. He’s putting a brave face on it, but I think he is pretty shocked because it was so sudden (and while driving on the motorway, just for that extra touch of excitement).

    Keeping my fingers crossed for Pickles’ prompt return. Nothing like a missing member of the household to rack the nerves :(

  103. 603
    The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa)

    Hey all, just got back from the biggest group camping trip ever. It was pretty intense. I’m completely threadrupt for the last four days or so.

    What did I miss?

  104. 604
    carlie

    I’m sorry, Audley. I hope Pickles turns up.

    I made a fake bonsai out of a small pot and a Lycopodium from my yard. I amuse myself. (pic on twitter, for those there)

  105. 605
    cicely

    Glad to hear that the Redhead is improving, if not as quickly as would be preferred.
    -
    *hug* for Audley. We had a cat who would, very occasionally, disappear for a couple of weeks at a time…in the dead of winter. She’d come home all matted (she was a long-haired cat) and in a foul mood, but otherwise well. Used to drive us nuts.

    Is there a couch, or a box springs or something, that might have a fabric rip that Pickles could get into? We had a (different) cat who found out that a box spring had such a rip that was concealed by the comforter, where it hung over the sides. She ignored us calling for her all frickin’ day long; I guess she needed more privacy for her nap.
    -

  106. 606
    Nick Gotts

    Best wishes for opposablethumbs’ friend, and Audley’s cat.

    Son had his maths exam today. May not have got the A grade he is likely to need to get the university place he wants :-( but we won’t know for some time. Apparently everyone taking it thought the exam was v. hard.

  107. 607
    opposablethumbs

    Thank you KG. And best wishes for All the Fun of the Exam Season (is that Highers, for him? SonSpawn is having GCSE Fun this week … argh).

  108. 608
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks, everybody.

    I’ll be home from work in a little less than an hour– it’s raining a shit ton right now, so if Pickles is outside, I hope this drives her inside. If not, I’m going to tear apart every square inch of the apartment while Mr Darkheart checks the neighborhood.

    If she’s inside, begging for food when we get home, I’m going to be sooooooooo relieved.

  109. 609
    birgerjohansson

    “Every black hole contains a new universe: A physicist presents a solution to present-day cosmic mysteries” http://phys.org/news/2012-05-black-hole-universe-physicist-solution.html
    This seems to be built on previous ideas by Leo Smolin

    More cool stuff
    “Totally rad: Scientists create rewritable digital data storage in DNA” http://phys.org/news/2012-05-totally-rad-scientists-rewritable-digital.html

  110. 610
    Alethea Kuiper-Belt

    *crosses fingers for Pickles*

  111. 611
    cm's changeable moniker (quaint, if not charming)

    The birth rate of minority children has exceeded that of white children in the US for the first time.

    http://www.animalnewyork.com/2012/ill-doctrine-dont-freak-out-about-the-white-babies/

    (via Ms. Smartypants)

  112. 612
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    So, I’m going to bed.
    I suppose the “renovation thread” will explode over night.
    Hope that Audley finds a healthy cat at home on arrival

  113. 613
    birgerjohansson

    The Cannes film festival has started.
    -It just occurred to me that it is now 50 years since “Solaris” won the jury’s special Grand Prix award, the only science fiction film to have done so.

    Solaris: film theme (by J. S. Bach) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlD-9uwHA40&feature=related

    Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solaris_(1972_film)

  114. 614
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    Dang, this is a bad year. I just received word my graduate adviser died yesterday. I’ll hoist a tankard of grog in his honor, and those of you who like Scotch, his favorite beverage, can also join the toast with the appropriate drink. Anybody else can join it, this is on me. *deals out drinks*

  115. 615
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    *toast, this is my meager effort, the Redhead would hit it in one*

    To Professor [name withheld for privacy], PhD., D. Sc., who studied internationally, and worked in academia in his native country, and developed an international reputation doing so. Decided to immigrate to the US in middle age, worked his way up to a chaired professorship here in the US prior to his retirement. He has his academic progeny, including me, scattered throughout the world in varied capacities. He was also a freethinker, from an area that frowns on such activity. He had a long and prosperous life, and is survived by children and grand children. May you rest in peace.

    Cheers.

    *drinks tankard*

  116. 616
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    Nerd, it sounds like like adviser had a life well lived and had a positive effect on his surroundings. While sad, celebrate. What more can anyone really ask for?

    Cheers!

    *downs grog*

  117. 617
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    grumbles about the fucking typo monster

  118. 618
    Louis

    Nerd,

    1) Sincere commiserations.

    2) Grrrr….NOW I’m curious! ;-) It’s okay, I can live with it.

    Louis

  119. 619
    chigau (違う)

    Cheers! for a life well-lived and a wonderful legacy.

  120. 620
    Jessa

    Audley: Fingers crossed that you find Pickles safe and sound.

    Nerd: It sounds like your adviser was a good man who lived a full life. *clinks tankard*

  121. 621
    Jessa

    And yet another entry in the “Bigoted Morons of North Carolina” file: “North Carolina Pastor: Pen In ‘All The Lesbians And Queers’ With An Electrified Fence, Wait For Them To ‘Die Out’”.

  122. 622
    MikeG

    To the Nerd’s advisor! Few outside our family have such impact on out lives.
    *downs tankard*
    (oh no, that was the seven day, wasn’t it?)
    Here’s to him!

  123. 623
    MikeG

    Also, fingers crossed for a successful Pickles finding.
    We thought we lost our kitty for a good portion of an afternoon. It turns out that without her eyes open, she was completely invisible on Mrs. G’s black wool coat.

  124. 624
    cm's changeable moniker (quaint, if not charming)

    From the “do these people not get science?” chronicles:

    Daniel Webster’s (R-FL) [...] bill to eliminate the American Community Survey, today’s version of the Census data gathering that’s been a core input to what we know about America for well over a century.

    Rep Webster argued that the survey is a waste of money because it’s random: “We’re spending $70 per person to fill this out. That’s just not cost effective,” he continued, “especially since in the end this is not a scientific survey. It’s a random survey.”

    Jared Bernstein:

    O-M-G.

    Random sampling is what makes such a survey scientific.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/20/sunday-review/the-debate-over-the-american-community-survey.html

  125. 625
    Ms. Daisy Cutter, General Manager for the Cleveland Steamers

    So Greg Laden has a post up: “Can Blogs Be Used to Resolve Conflicts?”

    I wonder if he means, with or without people’s comments being stealth-edited by the blogger? I’d ask, but, you know.

    Nerd, condolences on your advisor. It sounds like he had a full, rich, meaningful life that left its mark on the world.

    cm’s changeable moniker, of course they don’t get science. Random surveys aren’t scientific, you can get petroleum out of trees, and the value of pi can be put to a vote.

  126. 626
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks for the well wishes everyone.

    We’ve spent the better part of the evening looking for Pickles– we’ve checked everywhere in the apartment and looked for her in a several block radius of our building.

    We’ve come up with nothing so far. I don’t want to give up, but I don’t know what else we can do tonight.

  127. 627
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    We’ve come up with nothing so far. I don’t want to give up, but I don’t know what else we can do tonight.

    The Redhead’s BFF adopted a kitteh after her husband retired. They spend the summers in the Pocono’s and winter in Florida. The kitteh has a habit of hiding during motel stays on the trips. By hiding, becoming one with the chair or rocker in the motel room. Kitteh disappears…

  128. 628
    Ing

    Stopping for night…partner stoping me from chasing beetles outside hotel.

    Flipping car was supposed to be there tonight :(

  129. 629
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    WE FOUND PICKLES!

    Mr Darkheart took out the trash and as a last ditch effort, he checked underneath our downstairs neighbor’s porch (which, up ’til then we had checked at least a half a dozen times).

    Guess where Pickles was.

    It seems like she was under there all day. She’s dirty, but she’s bone dry (it’s been raining since noon) and she is completely uninjured– no scratches, no limping, etc– so that means that she didn’t get into a fight with another animal. She probably never left the courtyard.

    This also means that she’s supercat. She wriggled out of the bathroom window, which is three stories up, landed on concrete, and doesn’t have a scratch to show for it.

    Anyway, she’s eaten, had some water, and had a little bit of a catnip treat. Now she’s sitting on the living room floor and grooming herself. :)

  130. 630
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    Nerd, my condolences. I’ll raise a can of Coke and drink to his memory.

    Audley, I’m so sorry. I hope Pickles finds her way home.

  131. 631
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Hekuni,
    My cat is home! ♥!

  132. 632
    The Laughing Coyote (Canis Sativa)

    congratulations on the return of the Prodigal Cat, Audley

  133. 633
    Nutmeg

    Yay for safe Pickles! I’m so glad to hear good news.

  134. 634
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks!

    Pickles is still eating– it’s been a tough day. I’m being careful to give her tiny servings, so she doesn’t eat too much too fast and end up just horfing it up.

  135. 635
    Hekuni Cat, MQG

    Audley, that’s wonderful and a great relief. I was quite worried about her–and you and Mr. Darkheart.

  136. 636
    Pteryxx

    Yay Pickles! Heck, that’s about as happy as finger wiggling.

  137. 637
    Cipher

    Yay! Kitty! ♥
    I have work to do tonight. I have plans to stay up for a long time. It should be nice.

  138. 638
    kristinc, now with added ventilation

    Oh, that’s great to hear Audley.

    When my Titus was a kitten he suddenly vanished one afternoon. I’d put a bell on him for just such eventualities, but no jingling either. I started out looking casually, got a bit worried after a while and graduated to pretty much full-on panic when he was still completely missing an hour later. (Understand that he was a very young kitten, and the last time I hadn’t been able to find a kitten at our house, it had been a sick kitten, and, well, let’s just say it wasn’t a happy ending.)

    I finally found him when he woke up, in the bottom of a bookshelf. He had squozed himself into a tiny two inch gap between the top of a stack of books and the next shelf up, way at the back. I had looked at all the shelves, of course, but had no idea there was a big enough gap there for him to get into and drift off for a snooze.

  139. 639
    Tony! The Queer Shoop

    Louis (from the Women in Secularism thread; I didn’t want to diverge the thread as my response isn’t relevant):

    If someone is a mild arse once, maybe over look it (or skip to step 2). If someone is a mild arse twice, have a quiet word. If someone is a mild arse a third time…get me my rolled up newspaper, I’m about to play “Whack A Nose”.*

    So story time again.
    Picture it. Pensacola, Florida. The evening of Thursday, May 10. 3 guests walk into my bar, 1 woman and 2 men (all three of them are caucasian; it’s relevant). They sit. I greet. I give drink special spiel. All order. Upon handing a bottle of Corona to one of the guys, he responds “Thanks my nigga”. I don’t have a dark complexion, but its obvious to anyone with eyes that function decently that there is some black in me. I don’t like the word. I don’t like it used by anyone (I even argued with myself as I was typing up this comment. I didn’t even want to type the word, but my gut said I should). I hate hearing it in rap/hip hop (thankfully I don’t listen to that genre), and I wish the word would meet up with the dodo. However, I realize I can’t control what other people say, so unless it’s directed at me, I just cringe on the inside and go about my business. However, this *was* directed at me. I informed the guest that I find the word offensive, even though the ‘a’ replaces the ‘-er’ and I politely, but firmly asked him to not use the word to refer to me. He goes on to explain that it no longer means what it used to and now its a term of endearment ::rolls eyes::. After reinforcing my request that he not use that word towards me again, he does so again! Rather gutsy I have to say. At this point, he’s gone from a guest to whom I made a reasonable request to a moron who is trying to bait me. His friends jump in at this point to chastize him, but it doesn’t work. He once again asserts that it’s an endearing term (who the heck finds it endearing?), but also adds that the customer is always right. No, I couldn’t slam my head against the bartop, it’s concrete. Facepalm had to do. I told him if he continued he wouldn’t be served at my bar. So what does he do? He uses the word a 3rd time. At which point, my cool is lost and I tell him that he’s cut off, the customer is NOT always right, especially when you deliberately insult an employee (yet moronically expect to continue to get service…), and that I can and will have him kicked out. His friends were aghast at his willful stupidity, arrogance, and white privilege.* As soon as he said it, the empty beer glass I had in my hand got thrown into a sink and broke. I was more than a little angry. Then some of my friends/regular bar guests took note and started trying to inquire (do you know how hard it is not to angrily respond to people who did you no wrong when you’re in the middle of being massively pissed off?). Thankfully, another bartender came on and I was able to walk off bar and collect myself (had to go in the kitchen so friends wouldn’t follow me). After about 10 minutes (and multiple explanations to various people) I came back out and he was gone. I can’t figure out which is more astonishing:
    the “guest is always right” card, which anyone over the age of 10 should know is far from true
    or
    “its a term of endearment”
    FFS.
    I’ve been a bartender for 12 years now and I’ve seen some things. I’ve dealt with some bullshit, and most of the time I can keep my cool, but this was not one of those times. To deliberately insult me after I asked him not to…AND the idiot thought he was going to get served.

    *at one point his friends tried to apologize for him. I told them that I appreciated their efforts, but that he’s not their child. He’s not their responsibility and apologies would need to come from the ass’ mouth. There never were any (as deliberately ignorant as he was, I can’t see why he would have). In fact, I’m not certain I’d have accepted an apology after the third time. If it ain’t sincere, don’t bother me with it.

  140. 640
    Josh, Official SpokesGay

    OK. Now that Pickles is home I’ma talk trash about her.

    Pickles is bullshit. She’s this adorable, pretty little mostly white cat who’s unbelievably tiny. You’d think she was a kitten. And she gets up on the damned counter and saunters insouciantly along in full view of the humans. Yet when a kindly stranger (errmm. . .SpokesGay) tries to pick her up she’s all like, “Oh no, faggot. No you di’int.”

    How do I know this? Because I’ve been all up in Audley’s and Pickles’ bidness. I’ve seen where these felid hangs. I know her secrets.

    Audley, seriously, I’m so glad she’s home. I know the heartache of a cat wandering away and wondering if they’re dead. . it’s awful. Thank goodness Pickles is home.

  141. 641
    opposablethumbs

    Commiserations Nerd ::raises glass:: – to your advisor, clearly someone who achieved more and left a greater and more positive mark on the world than most people can aspire to.
    .
    .

    WE FOUND PICKLES!

    ::dancing and rejoicing:: I’m so glad for you Audley!It’s wonderful that you’ve got her back. (Dog here is a professional escape artist*, which terrifies the life out of me every time she does it as there is a massively busy main road just at the end of the lane and she is Not Good with Strangers. Not the same circs I know, but I share your fear and am breathing a huge sigh of relief for Pickles.
    .
    * come to think of it, that means she is a PEA and possibly in league with horses. I should consult the experts here on how best to deal with this thorny issue.

  142. 642
    Alethea Kuiper-Belt

    Yay Pickles!

  143. 643
    theophontes (恶六六六缓步动物)

    @ Audley

    {raises bowl of kimchi} Pickles!

    @ life is like a pitbull with lipstick ॐ

    No slaps, but I think the spanking couch is free (check for stray kittehz before use!)

    I tried to download your file onto my office machine without success. It could be a cyberwall thingy, so I’ll copy to USB at home. … try again tomorrow.


    The prodigal spawnphontes is back. I haz very happy!

  144. 644
    birgerjohansson

    Yay Pickles!

    Better take her to the vet, and check stuff like kidney function.
    — — — — — — —

    “Democrats’ Seven Deadly Sins” http://www.huffingtonpost.com/michael-brenner/democrats-seven-deadly-si_b_1533001.html
    Spot on !!! -Every Democratic politician should read that.
    — — — — — —
    My bad, it is 40 years since Solaris won the jury price at the Cannes film festival. There are so many people around me who have their 50th birthday so I got confused.

  145. 645
    Louis

    Tony, #139,

    Ouch. You’re a better man than I am. My beer glass would have {ahem} “missed the sink” as I hopped the bar, probably 7 times out of 10. ;-)

    Okay, okay, I exaggerate, 1 in 3.

    It’s the doubling down the guy did that would have done it for me (like it did with you). I’m impressed you even commented, I wouldn’t have always had the guts when working behind a bar (and my parents own a bar/restaurant, I’ve done my time! I know the drill!).

    Imagine a kind of reverse situation, even if someone was staking a position I knew to be factually wrong, say a creationist bartender served me and my friends whilst we were cracking wise about the shortcomings of creationism, if the bartender asked me to knock it off or take it away from the bar, I’d likely do it. The poor sod is at work, after the shift they might want to sit down with a beer and debate, they might not, but when they’re working let them do their damned job. Even if their request is (within reason) relatively against your principles…good principles even…shut the fuck up and go the fuck away. At worst leave/finish your drinks and find another bar.

    If a bartender used racist slurs around/at me, that’s a different bag, but it’s a “quiet word” moment to start with, doubling down escalates it to “quiet word with boss followed by never frequenting said establishment again”.

    So, yeah, I’m with you. This customer of yours fits into that special category of arse that needs escorting from the premises.

    And “the customer is always right”? I hear you, brother. The answer is “rarely”. Don’t get me wrong, excellent customer service was always a priority for me when I worked for mum and dad, lo those many years ago, but you don’t have to be walked over by rude or patronising customers.

    I once told one customer, who was being particularly obnoxious, “I might be your waiter, but I’m still a person”. He went beet red and stuttered something. My reply “thought so”.

    Oh to be a teenager and all angry again!

    Wait….I’m still angry….hmmmm.

    {Claps hands}

    Xavier! The extra strength double Bob Marley special super cannabis if you would be so kind! And perhaps a mint julep! Oh and whilst your at it, rotate the strippers in the conversation and orgy pit.

    It’s so hard to get good help these days.

    Louis

  146. 646
    Louis

    Audley,

    Re: Pickles finding.

    You pregnant women with your Pickles…

    …Did I done a misunderstandingism?

    ;-)

    Louis

    P.S. Felicitations!

  147. 647
  148. 648
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    Good morning

    Yay for Pickles!

    Comiserations to Nerd

    So, I went to my GP today for the check-up.
    My iron is low, one of my liver values is off (nothing to worry about much, yet. Totally possible that it’s just from all those infections), cholesterol, kidneys, everything fine but my thyroid, of course.
    More blood-testing ensured. They don’t want to call it “Hashimoto” yet, but since my sister has it, the bets are on it.
    Now I’m half torn between “well, there’s an answer to some of my problems and we can work on it” and “shitshitshit I’m broken”
    At least I got my vaccinations up to date…

  149. 649
    birgerjohansson

    “Delphi gasoline-injection engine technique rivals hybrid’s edge” http://phys.org/news/2012-05-delphi-gasoline-injection-technique-rivals-hybrid.html
    (I am automatically skeptic to stuff that seems too good to be true)

  150. 650
    Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls

    WE FOUND PICKLES!

    Glad to hear.

  151. 651
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Thanks everybody! ♥ ♥ ♥!

    Pickles ate her breakfast just fine this morning and seems to be her normal (albeit weird) self. :)

    Josh:

    Yet when a kindly stranger (errmm. . .SpokesGay) tries to pick her up she’s all like, “Oh no, faggot. No you di’int.”

    Don’t take it too personally. Pickles hates everyone (including me) except for Mr Darkheart.

    No… “hate” is too strong a word and implies an active dislike. She feels that she’s too good for everyone (including the other cats) except Mr Darkheart. You all just aren’t classy enough for her tastes.

    Louis:

    You pregnant women with your Pickles…

    …Did I done a misunderstandingism?

    :)

    Actually, her name is Pickles because I have always LOVED pickles. OM NOM NOM. She’s the only cat that I’ve named– the other two have much more, um, dignified names.

    (I wanted to name Maggie, who is a long-hair, “Fluffy Butt”, but Mr Darkheart vetoed that idea.

    And to think, in a few months I’ll be naming a child. Watch out world!)

  152. 652
    strange gods before me ॐ

    So Greg Laden has a post up: “Can Blogs Be Used to Resolve Conflicts?”

    I wonder if he means, with or without people’s comments being stealth-edited by the blogger? I’d ask, but, you know.

    *snerk*

    In other news, Greg’s tormenting of the Golden Dawn has resulted in him being outed as a Mason. I think they’re just insinuating that he’s working with the Antichrist.

  153. 653
    strange gods before me ॐ

    I tried to download your file onto my office machine without success. It could be a cyberwall thingy

    Not surprised. Good luck.

  154. 654
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    Yay Pickles!

    The one time that we had a cat get out for real (not just being good at hiding), we found him under a neighbor’s porch and he was so happy to see us. He had wandered all of 15 feet from the door and was hopelessly lost.

    Giliell:

    At least if the doctor is approaching a diagnosis they are also approaching a treatment, right? Anyway, good luck.

    I had my first annual physical in three years last month and, other than my blood pressure, things are good. My cholesterol was 78. My doctor wants me to eat more eggs. Those are easily solved.

    No trying to compare my bp with your thyroid, but at least Hashimoto’s thyroiditis can be treated.

  155. 655
    Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk-

    Ogvorbis
    Thanks. Yeah, we did more blood-testing today and will start hormone therapy at the latest next week.
    I know that Hashimoto’s is managable, on the other hand, I see my sister who has shit problems managing it.
    On the bright side i might lose some weight that way..

    And that cupcake over at the Renovation-thread is getting more and more asshole.

  156. 656
    Kevin, Youhao Huo Mao

    Good morning!

    I had a productive day yesterday. I got a clothesline for my balcony, I built the LEGO Millenium Falcon (the cheaper one, not the $1200 version) and I put a collar on Snip. Found out that my apartment complex requires cats to have ID tags, so he’s gotta wear a collar. He hates it, obviously, but I have to put it on him for the rules of my apartment as well as, and now I realize, my own peace of mind.

    It’s not happened yet, but imagine if some maintenance person opens the door and Snip feels like exploring. The maintenance person might not see Snip run out and he’d get into the apartment hallway. If someone found him, I’d like them to be able to call and say “found your kitty” rather than have them plaster posters on the walls.

  157. 657
    John Morales

    ॐ:

    In other news, Greg’s tormenting of the Golden Dawn has resulted in him being outed as a Mason.

    Bah.

    Thanks for nothing; I clicked and was “rewarded” with graphics-heavy content-poor crap.

    (I really should know better by now than to look at Grog Leaden’s blog)

  158. 658
    theophontes (恶六六六缓步动物)

    @ kitty

    Re: Snip.

    Have you looked into tagging Snip’s ear with an ID-chip. They are tiny and hidden – and are great if your cat ever goes missing (teh kittehz are really good at slipping collars). Also you can get Snip a cat tat… (Details, not picture of an all conquering octopus!)

    @

    OK. I can download your files in theaphontes’s office. I have saved to USB and will take back to Shenzhen tomorrow.

    Oh, and really cool cat you have. (I am rather tardy, I only noticed the pic you sent, this evening.)

  159. 659
    Louis

    Greg has, I understand, written lucidly on the Congo.

    Abbie has, I understand, written lucidly on virology.

    Chris Mooney has, I understand, written lucidly about Climate Change Denialists and Republicans.

    Hmmmmm.

    {Lazily racist and overly bad Speedy Gonzales Mexican accent}

    Excuse me, señor, I think I see a pattern.

    Luis

  160. 660
    Kevin, Youhao Huo Mao

    @Theophontes:

    I’m probably just going to leave it on him when I’m not home. And actually most cat collars are designed specifically to slip off – cause if they get caught they don’t want the kitty to choke. He’s not very happy with it obviously, but I’d rather him be unhappy and able to be IDed than happy and possibly able to get lost.

    I have a microchip in him too, but the average person might not know to bring him to a shelter.

  161. 661
    carlie

    Giliell – nuts about the thyroid, but at least if you know what it is, you can treat it. Since you’ve watched your sister you know it’s a bear to get the right brand and dose of medication and then get used to it, but it should help. Good luck.

    YAY PICKLES! Silly kitty.

    Katherine, hooray for getting settled in! And the cat will get used to it soon.

  162. 662
    carlie

    …We keep thinking about collaring our cat too. I went ahead and got a collar and punch-on tag (the kind that goes right on the collar, not on a jangly thing), but haven’t made her wear it yet. What with how she looks longingly outside, though, she might be a bolter. Although when I take her out with the harness, suddenly outside is scary and she wants right back in. Silly kitties.

  163. 663
    opposablethumbs

    :((( and {{hugs}} for Giliell – hope definitive diagnosis and treatment are go, and that they go well for you.

  164. 664
    carlie

    If you’re on twitter, there’s a hashtag trying to trend called #replaceawordwithlibrarian. It’s pretty awesome.

  165. 665
    Kevin, Youhao Huo Mao

    @Carlie:

    Kitties are silly. Snip usually hangs out by the door waiting for freedom, but the second he gets in the hallway he wants to go back inside.

  166. 666
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Kat,
    Snip will adjust to a collar fairly quickly. He might be pissed off for a few days, but trust me, it’s definitely worth it.

    I’ve got to head out to PetSmart later today for turtle* food, so I might just have to get collars and order tags for my cats. I’m not going through with this shit again.

    *One animal who will not run away.

  167. 667
    birgerjohansson

    12 degrees C. in the shadow, quite warm in the sun. Summer has arrived. ;-)

  168. 668
    Kevin, Youhao Huo Mao

    @audley:

    I’ve got to head out to PetSmart later today for turtle* food, [snip] *One animal who will not run away.

    Actually, they might run away (#3*.) Just very slowly.

    *Cracked.com, be warned.

  169. 669
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    Kat,
    I saw that the other day! :)

    Trust me, I know my Emery and she’s not keen on wandering too far from her food source.

  170. 670
    carlie

    so I might just have to get collars and order tags for my cats.

    You might not have to order – our Petsmart has a cool laser engraving thingy that looks like a big arcade game. You pop in the tag, type in the info, and it prints it out right there for you. Pew pew pew!

  171. 671
    birgerjohansson

    “Excuse me, señor, I think I see a pattern”

    -people write well about subjects they are knowledgeable about and are unreliable when addressing s tuff they are ignorant about? At least that is one out of two. I daily see people on TV that get zero out of two.

  172. 672
    Rev. BigDumbChimp

    not sure if this has been linked to yet but

    meet George Tierney

    some unfortunate choices of words in the write up, but just

    wow

  173. 673
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    carlie:

    You might not have to order – our Petsmart has a cool laser engraving thingy that looks like a big arcade game. You pop in the tag, type in the info, and it prints it out right there for you. Pew pew pew!

    Awesome!

    Mr Darkheart isn’t sure that it’s worth it to get them all collars, but Pickles launched herself out of a third story window! She obviously can’t be truated 100%. I’d say spending a couple of bucks so my kittehs get returned home safely should they get out is totes worth it.

    (I’ve never put a tag on a cat– what info should I include?)

  174. 674
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    *Or “trusted”. My fingers no wurk to gud this morning.

    *Leaves offering to Tpyos*

  175. 675
    PZ Myers

    NEW THREAD!

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