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Sounds like a fair trade

I had no idea that the one true reason women get abortions is to avoid stretch marks. At least that’s how little Scotty on facebook explains the problem.

That’s an interesting exchange, too: so both sexes have to make sacrifices, with us men giving up porn, and women giving up 9 months of their life and the pristine smoothness of their abdominal connective tissue. Oh, and he probably expects the women to give up their careers and stay at home tending to the babies afterwards, as well. Those are perfectly comparable compromises.

I also really like the tortured reasoning in there to excuse his god from the crime of murder. He never murdered anyone, he only ordered “some slaying” (like, all but 8 people on the planet), and those were like totally justified because they were wicked.

Sometimes people accuse atheists of wanting to convert people. I have a deal: we won’t try to convert people like Scotty ever, not that rational arguments would matter to him. Nasty little maggots like that, we’d rather not have in the atheist camp, and they can all stay Christian.

Comments

  1. dexitroboper says

    But once you’ve eliminated all the scumbags from deconversion, there’s nobody left!

  2. says

    “Lets say your sleeping at home and a looser breaks in and trys to kill your famlie…”

    I have a rule about paying attention to people who misspell six words in the span of one sentence: never pay attention to people who misspell six words in the span of one sentence.

  3. raven says

    Scotty the moronic troll:

    Any chick who would rather have an abortion than have a few strech marks is a cunt.

    Any chick who values her life would run like hell away from little Scotty Hickox. The chances of her birthing a few low IQ toadlings is very high.

    The chances of her being abused are probably just about as high.

    But it’s not all bad. It’s really great that the bottom of the barrel toads wear big signs saying, “I’m an obnoxious idiot.” Thanks Scotty.

  4. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Hebrews 13:4

    Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

    Not really about murdering babies, is it?

  5. kemist says

    You know what’s a very good reason to abort ?

    Knowing without a doubt that you’ll give birth to such an idiot as this moron.

    Seriously. Can you imagine having to spend the rest of your life with your palm stuck to your face ?

  6. Khantron, the alien that only loves says

    But he’s not anonymous, so it’s the same thing as making an asshole comment like that in real life or worse, because more people will see it.

  7. says

    Of course God is justified for all those killings. I know you’ve read William Lane Craig’s “Divine Command Theory”. That’s how the world works according to some people for some reason I can’t understand myself.

  8. says

    I have a rule about paying attention to people who misspell six words in the span of one sentence: never pay attention to people who misspell six words in the span of one sentence.

    I’ve never really understood the “lose/loose,” “loser/looser” confusion. I could see it if the word “loose” didn’t exist, but I just wouldn’t ever look at “loose” and hear “lose.” It’s such a strange common error to me.

  9. Das Boese says

    Scotty seems to believe that he’s going to hell unless everything he ever writes contains at least one instance of the words GOD or JESUS, capitalized of course.

    It’s really bizarre watching these people trying to out-christian each other while completely oblivious to how much of an abject failure of morality their beliefs are.

  10. Randomfactor says

    It’s OK if gods say it’s OK.

    Sounds like that “moral relativism” I keep hearing about.

  11. dianne says

    It’s ok. The your/you’re confusion means that no one will sleep with him anyway so he’ll never have to face this issue in real life.

    Though to be fair, if he’s posting from a phone correcting the typos may be difficult and arguably not worth the trouble for something as informal as facebook.

  12. skepsci says

    To be fair, giving up porn wasn’t the only sacrifice he asked of us guys. We’re also supposed to stop thinking of “girls” as objects. So it’s a fair trade.

  13. Amphiox says

    How typical of these odious hypocrites to pontificate upon the reasons someone else might choose to do something in a situation he himself has never, and will never, ever, have to face.

  14. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    dianne:

    Though to be fair, if he’s posting from a phone correcting the typos may be difficult and arguably not worth the trouble for something as informal as facebook.

    Except he’s not. There’s nothing underneath his initial spewings to indicate that it’s a mobile post.

    He’s just an all around dumbass.

  15. Louis says

    [Cheek + Tongue]

    I have it on good authority* that this woman down the road had an abortion because the baby didn’t match the colour of her handbag and new shoes.

    Way to only care about shoes, women! What about the baby Jesus? Hmmm? Naughty ladies!

    It’s the materialist, consumerist, atheist, immoral, hippy, liberal women with their feminisms ruining everything you know. If they were permanently barefoot and pregnant they wouldn’t be worried about how well their baby will coordinate with the latest Prada heels now would they?

    [Cheek - Tongue]

    What’s worrying me now is twofold: 1) the above will be taken seriously by someone and they will not realise I am mocking fundamentalist, misogynist…but I repeat myself…arseholes, 2) that a subset of those who take the above seriously will actually agree with it…

    …and the world weeps.

    Louis

    *Actual authority may not be a) good or b) authoritative.

  16. says

    At least one of the comments employs a recognizable argument gimmick that goes something like “chill out, relax — you’ll live longer”. This is so common that I think it deserves one of those mock fallacy names, a la “argument from creative interpretation”. How about “argument from secluded beach”?

    BTW, there’s no intelligent life in Scotty.

  17. dianne says

    He’s just an all around dumbass.

    The evidence for your hypothesis is significantly stronger. Certainly his logic is pretty unimpressive.

  18. raven says

    He’s also homeschooled and likes Kent Hovind.

    I was wondering if he ever managed to graduate from grade school.

    As it turns out, he hasn’t.

  19. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    Hit submit early damn it

    Another post of scotty

    I dedicate this to the following: catholicism-atheism-Islam-judaism-satanism-homosexuality-scientology-wicca- the assemblies of god-mormonism-jehovah’s “false”witnesses-evolutionism-buddhism-abortionist-secular psychology-secular humanism-spiritism-reincarnation…ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE GOD OF THE BIBLE “JESUS CHRIST”

  20. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Oops. My bad. Kiss fan.

    Stupid face paint FTW!

    (Seriously, who doesn’t keep their fb on private? I don’t want any old Tom Dick or Harry to see my shit.)

  21. says

    “Lets say your sleeping at home and a looser breaks in and trys to kill your famlie…are you unjust or better yet a murderer if you waste him? I would hope you take that pice of crap out like yesterdays trash.”

    So it’s okay to kill a stranger who is threatening your life? How is this different from having an abortion? At least the fetus isn’t aware of what’s happening to it.

    Gotta love those loving xtians.

  22. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    His combination of bible quotes and The Dark Knight quotes is fucking bizarre.

    Lets Put a Smile on That Face
    “NEHEMIAH 8:10″ *

    It makes no sense! Fuck, it makes less sense than using Hebrews 13:4 to justify his stupid stretch marks argument.

    (Also, random capitalization make me twitch. Arg!)

  23. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    Scotty Hickox Thank you jayson. If im not fighting the system i am the system. But i find it hilarious that you think me to be a dangerous person when your evolutionary forefather Adolf Hitler was responsible for the holocaust. You see your religion require’s death, JESUS offers love, life and peace. You see im a thinker…Im not a part of societies cattle. But i have my faith and you have yours. If your side can be obnoxious & arrogant then dont be so heart broken to receive the same additude. GOD bless you

    oh he’s a peach

  24. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Scotty Hickox added Gene Simmons to his list of inspirational people.

    *snortle!*

    “I love Jesus, man. Also, Kiss. Can’t forget Kiss. Those guys rock!”

    I hope that no one informs little Scotty that Gene Simmons was born Chaim Weitz and, um, he’s Jewish.

  25. says

    I’ve never really understood the “lose/loose,” “loser/looser” confusion. I could see it if the word “loose” didn’t exist, but I just wouldn’t ever look at “loose” and hear “lose.” It’s such a strange common error to me.

    Makes perfect sense to me. Same beginning, same end, same letters, juts one extra. The words look incredibly alike.

  26. says

    Is this what happens when you breed a hick with an ox? Wondering if ‘homeschool’ had one qualified teacher, or even one teacher who graduated from high school….

  27. Ariaflame, BSc, BF, PhD says

    Lose/loose bugs me too. I also get students typing where instead of were, which I find even more boggling, I mean the verb to be is only one of the more commonly used in all its forms.

  28. says

    Lose/loose bugs me too. I also get students typing where instead of were, which I find even more boggling, I mean the verb to be is only one of the more commonly used in all its forms.

    Yes, that’s strange, too! It’s frustrating to me because I don’t understand the process that leads to these kinds of errors, but it must be widely shared because they’re so common.

    Is it that some people read and write without hearing the words in their heads? There wouldn’t be anything wrong with that – it just never occurred to me that people could.

  29. kristinc, ~delicate snowflake~ says

    *gasp!*
    A stupid asshole?
    On the internet??!?

    It’s OK Chas. You can get off the internet. See that little red X, you click that.

  30. says

    But they sound totally different. If you type “loose,” don’t you hear “loose”?

    It doesn’t matter. To my mind the written English and spoken English can be like different languages. I don’t hear a verbal “loose” when I write it, I see “l”s “o”s “s”s and “e”s.

  31. says

    Louis:

    I have it on good authority* that this woman down the road had an abortion because the baby didn’t match the colour of her handbag and new shoes.

    She ought to do lunch with the woman who wouldn’t have a colostomy because she couldn’t find shoes to match the bag.

  32. redwood says

    Soorry if this is jacking the thread a bit, but I agree with SC oon the adding an extra “o” to “lose.” I’ve seen this crooping up a loot recently and doon’t understand it. Foor oone thing, it gooes against linguistic (human) nature in making things moore coomplicated rather than simpler. Why woould anyoone want too type an extra oo when they doon’t have too?

  33. hotshoe says

    Is it that some people read and write without hearing the words in their heads? There wouldn’t be anything wrong with that – it just never occurred to me that people could.

    I hear ‘em. I hear everything I type as if I were speaking it, and I hear everything I read in an imagined voice.

    But my intuition is that only helps for spelling correctly when the print-vocalization link was set correctly in early schooling.

  34. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    redwood:
    Some of us are dyslexic, you know. I can’t fully explain why I can’t spell, but if I sound out a word to try to figure it out phonetically (not that phonetic spelling ever fucking works), I can’t necessarily order the letters correctly. It’s this totally frustrating mental block.

    And yeah, Ing @ 47 nailed it. The written word and spoken language are two totally separate things for me.

    Foor oone thing, it gooes against linguistic (human) nature in making things moore coomplicated rather than simpler.

    Ha! When has English ever been simple? for fuck’s sake, take the word “sauce”*. Now sound it out. IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE.

    Oh, was that supposed to be funny? Whomp whomp.

    *Which I can’t spell without a spell check.

  35. evader says

    Scotty needs to learn to spell…

    Ow my brain…

    *You were hit for 9,999 damage*
    *You have been defeated*

  36. says

    It doesn’t matter. To my mind the written English and spoken English can be like different languages. I don’t hear a verbal “loose” when I write it, I see “l”s “o”s “s”s and “e”s.

    And yeah, Ing @ 47 nailed it. The written word and spoken language are two totally separate things for me.

    That is fascinating. I’m glad I asked.

    (Just to be clear: I wasn’t expressing annoyance with the error but with my inability to understand what’s behind it.)

  37. robro says

    Perhaps I’m just old and/or old fashion, but I consider people’s sexual interests (among many other aspects of their life) to be a private matter regardless of their age, gender, preference, race, nationality, language, hair color, eye color, ear size, shoe size, et al.

    Unfortunately, a downside to freely available opinionating is it’s free and available to everyone, even those who have little respect for other people or themselves, much less worthwhile ideas to communicate.

    It is heartening, though, to an old codger of the 60s that there are quite a few young people sticking their necks out for civil liberties and basic human dignity these days. Wow!

  38. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    A. R:

    He even includes us Atheists!

    He’s made a couple of posts about atheists. Here’s one from July:

    ATTENTION ATHEIST!!
    by Scotty Hickox on Monday, July 25, 2011 at 4:21pm ·

    ATTENTION ALL ATHEIST THIS JUST IN! The Empire State Building & The Eiffel Tower have no maker, all Computers the world over have no maker.Thats right because everyone knows no Creator Equals Creation.Babys born with out Parents, People die without first living! Its so refreshing to know we all came from nothing! As a matter of fact we’re all in the way, lets all do as Casey Anthony so we can better evolve…Survival of the fittest

    1 Timothy 6:20

    O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:

    http://www.facebook.com/notes/scotty-hickox/attention-atheist/145656122180028

    Geez, I’ve never heard that argument before. *eyeroll*

  39. nms says

    I suspect that in many cases people making the lose/loose error do hear the words as they write them, but they mistake ‘loose’ for a heteronym that can be pronounced rhyming with either choose or moose. I suppose the test would be to have someone who made the error read their sentence out loud and see if they notice the misspelling.

  40. A. R says

    Audley: Sounds a bit Dr. Bronner. Why is it that all of the fundie godbots are utterly incapable of using the English language?

  41. A. R says

    Found the verse he referenced. I decided to look it up in one of the newer translations: “Timothy, guard what God has entrusted to you. Avoid godless, foolish discussions with those who oppose you with their so-called knowledge.” (1 Timothy 6:20 NLT)
    Wouldn’t it be nice if they actually followed this edict on occasion and left us alone?

  42. says

    That is fascinating. I’m glad I asked.

    (Just to be clear: I wasn’t expressing annoyance with the error but with my inability to understand what’s behind it.)

    No problem. It took a while for me to actually realize that not everyone saw such a spoken/written divide as I did.

  43. says

    As Long As A person has breath they can say yes to GODS & be HIS child

    Two things:

    1) Pretty sure fetuses don’t breathe in the womb, sooo… thanks Scotty for proving that, on top of a fetus not being a human, even ‘GOD’ doesn’t want them! To the abortion party!

    2) Maybe if God would pony up some child support there wouldn’t be so many abortions.

  44. says

    As Long As A person has breath they can say yes to GODS & be HIS child

    Whenever someone shows a pattern of baffling capitalization like that, I reflexively start reading them as Christopher Walken.

  45. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    No, I haven’t been reading Scotty’s facebook posts all night. Nuh uh. No freaking way.

    As a side note, he posts whoa! bible verses (I don’t think I’ve relied on the SAB so much in one day!), gushes about Stryper*, and thanks GOD for his job at Pizza Hut.

    SC:

    Just to be clear: I wasn’t expressing annoyance with the error but with my inability to understand what’s behind it.

    I didn’t think you were annoyed, but redwood did chafe my ass a little bit. Since I can barely explain how I process reading/writing, I totally understand your confusion. Hell, I can’t even come up with a halfway decent analogy for it.

    A. R:

    Why is it that all of the fundie godbots are utterly incapable of using the English language?

    Well, Scotty did graduate from Homeschool High™.

    *A Christian glam-rock band, or some shit.

  46. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Ing,

    Whenever someone shows a pattern of baffling capitalization like that, I reflexively start reading them as Christopher Walken.

    So full of win! XD

  47. janine says

    Whenever someone shows a pattern of baffling capitalization like that, I reflexively start reading them as Christopher Walken.

    Are you also imagining that person carrying a pocket watch up their ass?

  48. stevenbrown says

    I’m gonna have to pop in a bit here about home schooling: I was home schooled and I was raised as an atheist. I know there are a bunch of crazy christians in the states who home school so they can brainwash their kids but that doesn’t mean home schooling is bad in and of itself.

    In other news I just found out that those crazy fundies are using books and DVDs to brainwash their kids. As such I’d like to see people here criticise everyone who uses these and lump them in with dogmatic idiots.

  49. janine says

    Most of us know this, stevenbrown. One of the regulars, Mattir, home schools her children. One of them sometimes shows up here. Funny thing, she first showed up here in order to defend home schooling. After a bumpy start, she gave her stories about how difficult it was to find proper teaching material because the fundies have cornered the market.

    Where has she been?

  50. frankb says

    How do you spell “sure”. Let’s see…”S”, “H’, “U”, “R”???? Hummm, that doesn’t look right. Let me try again, “S”, “H”…

  51. Azkyroth says

    Most of us know this, stevenbrown.

    Is adding enough qualification to make it clear to a non-regular that you know it really THAT much of a hassle?

  52. says

    ‘Jehovah?’ I thought the xtains had finally got around to acknowledging their religion was Jewish … and the word Jehovah is meaningless. Oh wait, this guy’s a thinker, not cattle. Like he’s going to follow some trendy convention just because it’s true.

  53. says

    You really need to follow the thread all the way to the bottom where Scotty’s equally illiterate father comes to the rescue (to skool teh atheist) and the dumbfuckery is turned up to 11. My brain hurts now.

  54. microraptor says

    Kent Hovind is one of his inspirations. Is that shocking to anyone?

    Quite frankly, yes. I’d have thought Dr Dino would be far too intellectual for Scotty.

  55. says

    Redwood #49 – Please never do that to an innocent paragraph again. You probably caused half of Pharyngula to start banging their heads on the table to get out the bad words.

    From the page (must…resist…correcting…spelling…)

    Tim, Like i said this is my page and ill say what i feel like saying.If anyone does not like what i say then they can read something els

    You mean like “Your CV”? I wouldn’t trust this boy to give me extra fries.

  56. Alex the Pretty Good says

    Man… that first line of Scotty’s post brainfart just screams for a “[citation needed]“.

    This “argument” is even less than a straw-man … it’s a straw-strawman sliding down a slippery slope while shifting the goalposts.

  57. says

    Scotty is all kinds of crazy. In fact, he might be schizophrenic. He’s a fundie, which is kooky enough, but he’s also inspired by Gene Simmons, whose sinful behavior is legendary. He likes Kiss, who some fundies said was an acronym for “Knights in Satan’s Service.” He likes Queen. He likes a lot of metal (OK, hair metal) which isn’t exactly Jesus-friendly, as well as a bunch of other stuff that fundies frown upon.

    But the real question is: why am I wasting my time looking at his profile?!?!?!

  58. Dr. Audley Z. Darkheart, liar and scoundrel says

    Scottplumer,
    If you dig deep enough (as I did, ‘cos apparently I hate myself), many of the bands he likes are either Christian metal or they’ve made pro-Christian statements.

    Gene Simmons/Kiss still throws me for a loop, though. I mean, it’s not like lil’ Scotty is terribly fond of Jewish people. On the other hand, Gene Simmons is a war mongering, W supportin’, misogynist asshole, so there’s that.

  59. pyrobryan says

    God never killed anyone? God decided to kill all of mankind, along with every beast and everything that creepeth on the land and every fowl of the air, in the first book of the Bible and this is only the 6th chapter of that book. God never killed anyone? Check again (or perhaps, check for the first time)

    A bit later in Genesis 38:7 But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death. (it doesn’t even tell us what he did that was so wicked)

    Then, he turns around and does it again 3 verses later, “What [Onan] did was wicked in the LORD’s sight; so the LORD put him to death also.”

    Even if God never killed anyone himself, does it somehow make it better that he ordered genocide rather than commit it himself in some cases? Most genocidal despots don’t commit the killings themselves but order others to do it. Does that make it ok?

  60. Esteleth, Ph.D. of Mischief, Mayhem and Hilarity says

    Pol Pot never killed anyone either! I guess that means that the Khmer Rouge didn’t exist, or something.
    Y’know, I saw a site (searching for it now) that added up the people DIRECTLY killed by God in the Bible. It is several million. It then added up the people DIRECTLY killed by Satan. I think it was 5 or 6.

  61. Esteleth, Ph.D. of Mischief, Mayhem and Hilarity says

    Ah, here we go. 2,476,636 (God) vs 10 (Satan).

    But God is love and we should emulate that example?

  62. petzl20 says

    I don’t get why PZ marshals his pharyngulan minions of war against a 20 year-old home-schooled Facebook douche troll who can barely type English as a second language (viz, their/there and lose/loose). It is beneath him and beneath us.

  63. Aquaria says

    I’ve seen a whole lot of idiotic ‘reasoning’ from xtians when it comes to abortion, but this is a new one.

    Scotty is an asshole, and the same Go’s for his Gawd.

    Scottie is too fucking stupid to come up with this one on his own.

    Blame whatever loser planted this idea in his head. Most likely his scumbag shaman–who got it from some Karl Rovian language molester.

  64. renaissance13 says

    2,476,636 (God) vs 10 (Satan).

    Geeez. Maybe the evangelical fundamentalists are impressed by his big fatality tally.

    Satan isn’t even the same league…

  65. Marc Abian says

    It is beneath him and beneath us.

    This doesn’t have to be rationalised as anything other than a funny reason why this xian thinks women get abortions. Laughing isn’t beneath anyone.

    That is fascinating

    I never understand the fascinating/boring confusion…

  66. alcibiades19 says

    Did anyone catch the last comment?

    “as long as a person has breath…”

    Is he implying that fetuses can breathe? o.O

  67. jentokulano says

    @101
    “Is he implying that fetuses can breathe?”

    Though it’s clear Scott has never read the Hebrew bible, in the books life is indeed described as starting at first breath and not in the womb. Abortion is favored in the bible, not frowned upon.

    I’d suggest Scotty actually read it but given his poor grasp on modern English I can’t imagine he’d get very far with Elizabethan.

  68. No One says

    Read through my filter:

    -“Men should stop treating cunts as sex toys”.

    -“Thou shalt bear thy stretch marks, unlike the unmarked cunts”.

    -The universe is god’s recycle bin.

    -Say yes to god and his child’s love, or get a restraining order.

  69. No One says

    I’m gonna have to pop in a bit here about home schooling: I was home schooled and I was raised as an atheist. I know there are a bunch of crazy christians in the states who home school so they can brainwash their kids but that doesn’t mean home schooling is bad in and of itself.

    In other news I just found out that those crazy fundies are using books and DVDs to brainwash their kids. As such I’d like to see people here criticise everyone who uses these and lump them in with dogmatic idiots.

    I this persons case I’d be willing to bet his poor impulse control made him a candidate for homeschooling. I’ve seen it often enough.