Really weird sense of scale there. If you take in the pine tree behind the memorial, the way the snow is sitting on it looks like it’s a fairly large tree (size of the bristles, and how the snow lays on them), which means that memorial would have to be about 10 feet tall. Santa’s hat is on the corner of the base, and looks too large for the 10 foot tall angel to wear, which means Santa’s very large, yet Giant Jesus (where _is_ his left hand?) makes Santa look small…
“OW!!! GODDAMMIT who’s the asshole put a motherfucking statue right in the middle of my goddam christmas tree farm??? Tripped over the damn thing and nearly cracked my friggin skull! Owweeee Jesus it huuuuuuuurts! Hold me… yes… that’s nice… yeah, rub my back a little… mmmm… that feels good… here, give me your hand…”
Ok… back to work for me…
horrabinsays
Is there an equivalent to Poe for bad paintings?
I like to think Jesus isn’t kneeling, he’s just horrifically deformed like those bulldogs with tiny back legs in Tom and Jerry cartoons.
Does that price tag say $50.00?
Chris Hsays
Some poor schmuck is going to pay $50 for that thing.
Hairy Chrissays
That is amazing. As is the $50 price tag.
Beatrice, anormalement indécentesays
“There, there Santa. It’s just a stone statue. You know that Weeping Angels are not real. Let your strangely disproportionate imaginary friend comfort you.”
I’m in my forties and I will freely admit that the Weeping Angels gave me nightmares. So cut weepy Santa a break.
anchorsays
Who says religious sentiment inspires artwork superior to godless ones?
Man, that’s puke ugly.
'Tis Himself, OMsays
That’s okay, Santa. So Rudolph’s nose burned out. So the elves are on strike. So the reindeer have the mange. So the tooth fairy won’t be your mistress any more. So your wife is filing for divorce because she found out about the tooth fairy. It’s not all bad. At least you’re not dead like those people in the World Trade Center.
Moggiesays
You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I’m telling you why
Deformed Jesus is coming to town
jamessweetsays
I dunno, I’m not sure if y’all aren’t being overly literal here. I think I might almost like this piece. I’m not sure if the artist’s intention was that I chuckle slightly, but I’ve always said that artist’s don’t get to interpret their own work anyway…
This sort of reminds me thematically of how The Onion handled 9/11 when they reappeared two weeks later: A giant headline that said, “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” It was really funny but strangely poignant at the same time. It seemed to express that the enormity of what had happened (and more, the way it had happened — far more people died in the Japanese tsunami, of course, but we didn’t watch it live on TV, we didn’t hear the sound of people jumping to their death rather than suffer the flames any longer, etc.) was just so intense that any proportionate reaction couldn’t help but be funny.
frustumsays
This reminds me strongly of the work of The Onion’s editorial cartoonist:
I think the intended meaning of the painting is something like:
The destruction of the WTC on 911 sort of represents the impermanent and futile nature of man made endeavors on this planet that is ruled by the devil; everything in this world will come to an end, so don’t put your faith in them. Santa Claus represents those lost Christians who think they are doing good by celebrating Christmas by buying gifts, but in reality they have been led astray from Jesus who is the true meaning for Christmas. So Santa reconciling with Jesus shows us that to be true Christians, we must admit that our own works on earth are helpless and that we need god. Or something along those lines.
Well, I imagine that is a fairly obvious explanation. I’m always fascinated by just how absurd art can appear when you take away the symbolism (not to mention when it depicts a mutant Jesus dry-humping Santa).
Teh kiloGraemesays
Don’t. Blink.
Erm, I really don’t get this. How is Santa involved again? And why does Jesus look twisted? And why does Jesus have such a smug grin on his face?
Pierce R. Butlersays
At last – we’ve got them in the same place!
Scramble the fighter-bombers, load the artillery, re-program the drones – and cue the sailor and the nurse for their VX(mas) photo op!
jamessweetsays
Had to cut my comment #21 short to try (and fail) to put my son to bed for a nap. ANYWAY, to continue…
If I were to summarize the message of that piece in prose, it might be, “9/11 was so fucked up that Santa started sobbing and had to go get a hug from Jesus.” If we take for granted that both are mythological figures — and who knows if the artist does, though any time I see Santa and Jesus in the same room, I immediately suspect the person putting them there knows what’s up — then for me, that evokes the same kind of funny-poignant feeling as The Onion’s “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” headline.
If the artist doesn’t see it that way, then he/she is a douche, but I don’t care, because as I say artists don’t get to interpret their own work. I still think it’s funny and sad and an entertaining little piece.
teawithbertrandsays
$50.00 worth of 9/11 ka-ching combined with God-Bless-Our-Trailer-Park artistic merit. Two tasteless tastes that DON’T taste great together.
Seriously, this could make Jon McNaughton retch…or actually, maybe it’s some of his earlier work.
Fran Lagana-Brooks is a self-taught artist who now shares her talents and sensitivity with art students of all ages. In recent years she has received numerous awards including “First Place” and “Best of Show”. Fran’s oil painting titled “The Storm In My Tears” is a touching portrait of the Desert Storm war. A print is scheduled to be displayed in the George Bush Presidential Library at Texas A&M University.
The lithographic print of “The Weeping Santa” has sold in the thousands, attracting significant media attention, and prompted the artist to create the Christmas Series.
Fran’s works have become widely accepted and are now found in many private and public collections throughtout the United States and Canada.
Don’t click the “Art” button there unless you’re really tough…
I have no idea why my comment keeps being eaten. One last time.
It’s obvious that the consoled Santa represents America. After all, Uncle Sam and Santa Claus are one and the same.
I suspect the video link is to blame for my comment not going through, so readers! I challenge you to find the source of that lyric!
'Tis Himself, OMsays
I think it was drawn to illustrate the word “simpering.”
Thread won!
David Marjanović, OMsays
*mad giggling*
*mad cackling*
*more mad giggling*
I like comments 19 and 28.
Rich Woodssays
Look at the lack of footprints entering the scene. The artist is telling us that both Santa and Jesus can teleport.
I for one am convinced.
David Marjanović, OMsays
I have no idea why my comment keeps being eaten.
It isn’t. Just reload the page in a way that forces your computer to bypass the cache. The link in the “recent posts” list tends to work.
maquiavelosays
The red thing in the background is Santa’s hat? I took it for the hat of an elf whose body is being squeezed to pulp beneath the pedestal on which the stoney-faced angel of the Apocalyse is reading the Wall Street Journal. See the chubby cheeks the elf is blowing up beneath the crushing weight, just to the right of his red hat? Yes, this memento mori must hurt.
I can sympathize with the imagery.
delphi_otesays
If this is what our side is producing, I’m tempted to join the Taliban.
Rich #38 – Oh course Jesus and Santa can teleport.
DUH!
dunstarsays
ooooooo. the two magic bearded men face to face.
hey how come nobody has yet made an RPG game centered on the bible. Now that’d be friggin’ awesome wouldn’t you think?? It’ll have everything a good ‘ol fantasy RPG should have! lol
calliopejanesays
Unfortunately, not a Poe – in fact it is just one of many such pieces of “art,” part of the whole “Weeping Santa” collection: http://www.theweepingsanta.com/
bbgunnsays
I think I see numbers bleeding through some of the colors. At least it’s not painted on a plate with Jebus having that awful ubiquitous gaze. (My late aunt had Jebus on a Plate and those eyes always creeped me out.)
Moral: “Children of America, my imaginary friend loves your imaginary friend all to bits.”
jamessweetsays
Okay, re: my comments #21 and #29… I see now that the artist is, indeed, a mega-douche. As per what I said earlier, however, artist’s do not get to interpret their own work. I still see this as a piece that you are supposed to laugh at, and then reflect on the enormity of an event that could make people seriously feel the kind of emotions that would inspire this kind of imagery.
I reiterate what I said before: Any proportionate response to America’s experience of 9/11 is inherently somewhat hilarious, because it must by necessity be so over-the-top as to render itself absurd. An honest response to 9/11 cannot possibly be tasteful.
So I still like this piece for its honesty. But I agree that if you don’t laugh at it, you’re a douche.
Randomfactorsays
Nah, it’s all about how WE made Santa cry by not going out and shopping heavily as Our President said to boost the Holy Retail Bottom Line on Black Friday, and how the terrists won because without dropping our paychecks at Wal-Mart, why, it just isn’t Jesus’ Birthday.
EvoMonkeysays
This brings back memories. When I was in high school, I worked part-time at a small frame shop. People brought crap like this in the shop to be framed quite frequently – a lot of pictures of angels and Jesus hugging children. Anatomic accuracy and perspective always seemed to be lacking in these pictures. This though is clearly on a whole different plane of kitsch.
It was quite difficult to keep a straight face when assisting someone that would bring in similar “art”. I always tried to act enthusiastic about the picture and ask where they bought it. Usually the “art” was from a swap meet or a church craft bazaar. Shamefully, I admit that I probably would have said something like: “This clearly has to be put in a gold leaf frame – at $50 it deserves the best. And this isn’t just for the Holidays – that needs to be seen year round.”
lordshipmayhemsays
Awww, fictional person comforting other fictional person. Isn’t that sweet juvenile.
It’s a little-known fact that on 9/11 terrorists hijacked Santa’s sleigh and flew it into the Chrysler Building. Since the sleigh is powered by magic reindeer, there was no fuel on board and hence no explosion and little damage to the structure, and the incident was overshadowed by the other events of that day.
OK, I made that up. But I have no other explanation for this hack painting. Also, I really resent being inspired to joke about 9/11.
Zinc Avengersays
I think Jesus is saying “I warned you, Santa! Being jolly and happy and giving gifts is fine when they’re kids, but if you want to keep them believing when they’re adults, then you need fear!”
johndavidmyselfsays
Never knew Santa was so tiny.
Joshua Fishersays
@Glen
“Yay concern without lifting a finger to do anything.”
Give credit where credit is due, Glen. He “allowed” for steel beams that were assembled in the shape of a cross to stay in the shape of a cross. He “allowed” the reinforced southern end of the Mariott hotel to withstand the debris. That extra reinforced area allowed 14 people to survive. Come on, an omnipotent god shouldn’t be held to a higher standard than random chance.
bbgunnsays
I wonder if the artist would accept a commission to paint a picture of Jebus sitting in with the dogs playing poker?
johndavidmyselfsays
What’s that in front of the statue in the background; is that a dead elf lying in the snow? Maybe that’s why Santa is crying; might have been his favorite elf.
ChasCPetersonsays
Keep Al-Qaeda in Christmas!
or
Keep 9/11 in 12/25!
Hercules Grytpype-Thynnesays
Can we take up a collection to buy the original for the Museum of Bad Art?
“There, there, Santa. I know you’re sad about all the loss of life on 9/11, but it’s all part of my grand plan that brings us closer to the rapture and my new reign on Earth.”
I’m seeing a lot of mixed messages in this. The most perplexing is the price. Who would pay $50 for this piece of turd?
Matthewsays
Creepy. Very creepy.
lexaequitassays
The lithographic print of “The Weeping Santa” has sold in the thousands, attracting significant media attention, and prompted the artist to create the Christmas Series.
mouth. drops. open.
WTF??? Thousands? So this “artist” has made $50k+ from this painting?!
I think my mind will be permanently boggling now.
Butch Kittiessays
Wait, this painting is sincere? I honestly thought that the pairing of Jesus with Santa was meant in the way we atheists so often use it.
flyonthewallsays
If you blink or close your eyes the weeping angel moves closer.
antepreprosays
The elephant in the room: Why the fuck do Santa and Jesus care this much about 9/11? It’s not like they’re Americans. Or mortal. If they got all worked up over loss of human life, in our country or any other, they would have gone fucking insane well before weeping about 9-11, years after the fact, in the middle of winter. Also, Jesus is so large and out of proportion in this picture that I swear it is actually bigfoot wearing a Buddy Christ costume.
UpAgainstTheRopessays
That’s awesome but not $54.00 worth of awesome.
I must admit it’s needs a weeping clown hobo to add to the fanfare.
Ad at the top of this post:
Join Ron Paul’s Constitution day
money bomb Saturday 9/17 click here to pledge.
methinks they might have the wrong target audience. However coupled with Jesus, weeping Santa, 9/11 train wreck, it works as if I’d been magically transported to the the American Thinker website.
theskepticalapesays
Wow… just wow… Only an idiot would pay 50 bucks for that abomination, which is probably why they put Jesus on there, knowing it would draw in the suckers! Really, apart from the terrible sense of perspective, awful painting technique, and the weird use of mythical characters to express emotion like a misguided parent trying to explain to little Timmy why his goldfish is “sleeping” upside down at the top of the fishbowl, it’s great… but not worth 50 bucks. Maybe if the artist bought me a stiff drink and gave me an angry handy I might consider taking it off their hands, just for the comedic value of it, but me paying the artist for it? No way in Moria!
And seriously, all the references to Doctor Who win. You all get +10 to all your stats for that! Fellow Whovian’s unite!
No Gods, No Masters
Cameron
Tolpuddle Martyrsays
You would have to change so very little with some creative Photoshopping to make Santa blow Jesus!
Uh oh, guys,turn your faces away. Remember, the image of an angel is an angel. :)
Ragutissays
The lithographic print of “The Weeping Santa” has sold in the thousands, attracting significant media attention, and prompted the artist to create the Christmas Series.
The good news is that it appears that they both appear to blinking.
'Tis Himself, OMsays
Surely this work of art cries out to be painted on black velvet.
Matthew S. Northsays
Jebus’s head is like double the size of Santa’s. He’s a deformed hunch-backed mutant.
Wow! You may have thought after years of surfing the net you’ve seen the worst of bad taste and then this pops up.
Incredible.
Charlie Foxtrot (trying to catchup here)says
Look at that funny discoloration around Santa… obviously ‘shopped out the Unicorn to put him in there. That’d explain the scale being all wrong and the missing hand, too.
Charlie Foxtrotsays
Um, call me a cynic – but looking at the artist’s site it strikes me as a bit of a one-two suckerpunch deal.
I mean, who’s going to just buy the sad-weepy-puppy-seperation picture without also then getting the follow-up happy-weepy-puppy-reunion picture? Or the weepy-santa-babby-jeebus picture without then getting the consoling-baby-jeebus-weepy-santa picture?
Sounds like there’s money to be made in this religion thing – why’d no-one ever tell me that before!?
Matthew S Nothsays
Santa’s crying because giant deformed Jebus snuck up behind and scared the fuckin shit out of him!
Aha ha!! Ok, I’m done.
Matthew S Northsays
Santa’s crying because giant deformed Jebus snuck up behind and scared the fuckin shit out of him.
Ahh ha ha! Ok, I’m done.
Nessays
No, no, this isn’t “The Weeping Santa” which has sold thousands, this is “Remembering”. “The Weeping Santa” is the top picture here. At least that one isn’t horribly out of proportion…
Platypus@#4:
That was rather rude! Jesus’ shoulder is clearly thrust forward so he can rest his head on it. If your head was as heavy as his must be (given the scale of the scene as HappyHead@#6 describes), you’d need to rest your head on your shoulder too!
Now if only I could figure out where his lower legs went…
Hercules Grytpype-Thynnesays
Ahh ha ha! Ok, I’m done.
Why should we believe you this time?
joedsays
i thought the angel was the tooth fairy.
and i thought santa was jesus’ dad
im all messed up today
Charlie Foxtrot (a bit weepy)says
Why is Santa blowing his nose on the flag?
I thought Americans were a bit sensitive about that kind of thing… (well, at least the demographic I’d think likely to buy a piece of art featuring the flag and santa?)
Kemistsays
Don’t click the “Art” button there unless you’re really tough…
… Bleeeeaaaaaarghhhhh !
It looks exactly like what Dolores Umbridge would put on her walls. So simpering it borders on creepy.
And, I am a mostly self-taught painter too, but the thing is I could do immensely better than this at the age of 14 – especially when trying to paint or draw humans. Even if I did sort of paint fairly kitch stuff, including scenes from Star Wars.
Reverend PJsays
@66 Man, Jesus is a right bastard stealing a dude’s fix.
Carliesays
Unfortunately, not a Poe – in fact it is just one of many such pieces of “art,” part of the whole “Weeping Santa” collection:
There are crying hobo clowns.
HappyHeadsays
The more I look at this picture, the more I begin to suspect that it was originally several other pictures that were stitched together poorly with photoshop or something. It would explain why Giant Jesus’ entire right shoulder and arm are not only out of proportion with the rest of his body, but in fact are facing a different direction. If you put your hand over that area of G.J., he’s facing mostly to the left side – and if you only look at that part, it’s from someone who is smaller, and facing directly forward. The shading style and colors are similar, so probably from the same source, but definitely not the same original picture.
Kind of leads to the question of is this a “painting”, or a “print”? Somehow I suspect print is the case, and if you look hard enough, you’ll find nearly every part of this picture in some other, much better done picture.
marellasays
My first emotion on seeing this picture was just confusion, and then I read this comment.
Wait, this painting is sincere? I honestly thought that the pairing of Jesus with Santa was meant in the way we atheists so often use it.
But now I realise that Santa and Jesus are crying because 9/11 was the end for both of them. Jesus because people started to realise just how dangerous religion really is, and Santa because the wars in the Middle East have bankrupted the USA and now no one can afford Xmas prezzies.
Christians have no sense of perspective. Who knew…
Marie the Bookwyrmsays
myeck waters says:
13 September 2011 at 3:53 pm
I understand that in the original painting, Santa is standing a few steps higher than Jesus and holding a sword.
WIN!!!
snarkmattersays
All these years and I’m finally let down. No one got it right:
It is quite clearly a narrative about how 9/11 screwed up flying, forever. Santa can no longer fly because of the fucked up and random TSA guidelines. So now he’s crying to Jesus because he’s equally as powerless as Jesus.
On a side note, fuck whoever pointed out Jesus’ missing left hand. I checked for it and the position of which makes the scene far out creepy. Jesus’ missing left hand is in a position to be strategically slipped in and…well, maybe the 9/11 memorial is to divert the viewer from noticing that Jesus is diddling Santa. Replace Jesus with a Priest and Santa with an altar boy. Then shudder.
Janine, The Little Top Of Venom, OMsays
Is that the Black Angel of Iowa City? Why is Jesus comforting a weeping Santa in Iowa City?
Phasicsays
I am so very creeped out by that whole site I can’t even think of anything funny to say.
I’m pretty convinced that’s not a Stone Angel, rather a 9/11 Commemorative Pez dispenser.
Phoenician in a time of Romanssays
It’s obvious what happened. Santa’s sleigh crashed into Jesus riding a giant stone angel with a wierd number plate, killing Santa’s little elf. You can see the body in front of the angel.
Jesus got off his giant stone angel, walked over through the snow (note the footprints) and is now comforting a grieving Santa while wondering how to explain this to the cops. Any moment now he’s going to offer Santa a drink to calm him down, turn some of the snow into whiskey, and let the poor bastard pump his blood alcohol level up…
The Wogglersays
Barf
defidessays
Hah! Well, so much for you art snobs. I think it’s great.
Whatchoosay – an adult painted it? Are you sure?
sambargesays
It’s a bad sign when the art is so bad that you’re not sure if it was meant to be satirical.
bonefishsays
“…a self-taught artist…” Yeah, got one of those in my family. Kind of like religion, get the emotions going and everything else just goes right south, never to be seen again, including talent.
The “art” is just so bad it can’t be meant to be satirical, just has to be sincere. Sincerely horrible.
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Looks like it was done by an 8th grader who got a C on the project.
One mythical creature hugging another mythical creature. Sorta like Zeus hugging Bacchus.
Now we know why Amy Pond prayed to Santa Claus.
Because of the Stone Angel in the background?
What is up with Jesus’ shoulder? Does he have scoliosis or something?
There there, Santa, I comfort you. I’m all-powerful and didn’t stop the terror attack, but I’ll sympathize with your concern.
Yay concern without lifting a finger to do anything.
Glen Davidson
Really weird sense of scale there. If you take in the pine tree behind the memorial, the way the snow is sitting on it looks like it’s a fairly large tree (size of the bristles, and how the snow lays on them), which means that memorial would have to be about 10 feet tall. Santa’s hat is on the corner of the base, and looks too large for the 10 foot tall angel to wear, which means Santa’s very large, yet Giant Jesus (where _is_ his left hand?) makes Santa look small…
“OW!!! GODDAMMIT who’s the asshole put a motherfucking statue right in the middle of my goddam christmas tree farm??? Tripped over the damn thing and nearly cracked my friggin skull! Owweeee Jesus it huuuuuuuurts! Hold me… yes… that’s nice… yeah, rub my back a little… mmmm… that feels good… here, give me your hand…”
Ok… back to work for me…
Is there an equivalent to Poe for bad paintings?
I like to think Jesus isn’t kneeling, he’s just horrifically deformed like those bulldogs with tiny back legs in Tom and Jerry cartoons.
Does that price tag say $50.00?
Some poor schmuck is going to pay $50 for that thing.
That is amazing. As is the $50 price tag.
“There, there Santa. It’s just a stone statue. You know that Weeping Angels are not real. Let your strangely disproportionate imaginary friend comfort you.”
I’d really like to think this is a Poe.
I know Xmas seems to be getting earlier every year, but really…
Title: “Dry-humped by Jesus…again, oh and 911”
If it wasn’t associated with such a tragic event, I’d say the “artist” was going for the kitsch prize of the universe.
Make ’em in black velvet, and you got yourself a winnah!
I’m in my forties and I will freely admit that the Weeping Angels gave me nightmares. So cut weepy Santa a break.
Who says religious sentiment inspires artwork superior to godless ones?
Man, that’s puke ugly.
That’s okay, Santa. So Rudolph’s nose burned out. So the elves are on strike. So the reindeer have the mange. So the tooth fairy won’t be your mistress any more. So your wife is filing for divorce because she found out about the tooth fairy. It’s not all bad. At least you’re not dead like those people in the World Trade Center.
You better watch out
You better not cry
You better not pout
I’m telling you why
Deformed Jesus is coming to town
I dunno, I’m not sure if y’all aren’t being overly literal here. I think I might almost like this piece. I’m not sure if the artist’s intention was that I chuckle slightly, but I’ve always said that artist’s don’t get to interpret their own work anyway…
This sort of reminds me thematically of how The Onion handled 9/11 when they reappeared two weeks later: A giant headline that said, “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” It was really funny but strangely poignant at the same time. It seemed to express that the enormity of what had happened (and more, the way it had happened — far more people died in the Japanese tsunami, of course, but we didn’t watch it live on TV, we didn’t hear the sound of people jumping to their death rather than suffer the flames any longer, etc.) was just so intense that any proportionate reaction couldn’t help but be funny.
This reminds me strongly of the work of The Onion’s editorial cartoonist:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/september-12-2011,21333/
… except that The Onion is mocking that type of mush.
This looks like the sort of thing someone would request of a lad on 419eater.
At least the artist kept the tradition of a white Jesus and Santa.
Platypus says:
He’s on a cell phone call, forgot his bluetooth earpiece.
I think the intended meaning of the painting is something like:
The destruction of the WTC on 911 sort of represents the impermanent and futile nature of man made endeavors on this planet that is ruled by the devil; everything in this world will come to an end, so don’t put your faith in them. Santa Claus represents those lost Christians who think they are doing good by celebrating Christmas by buying gifts, but in reality they have been led astray from Jesus who is the true meaning for Christmas. So Santa reconciling with Jesus shows us that to be true Christians, we must admit that our own works on earth are helpless and that we need god. Or something along those lines.
Well, I imagine that is a fairly obvious explanation. I’m always fascinated by just how absurd art can appear when you take away the symbolism (not to mention when it depicts a mutant Jesus dry-humping Santa).
Don’t. Blink.
Erm, I really don’t get this. How is Santa involved again? And why does Jesus look twisted? And why does Jesus have such a smug grin on his face?
At last – we’ve got them in the same place!
Scramble the fighter-bombers, load the artillery, re-program the drones – and cue the sailor and the nurse for their VX(mas) photo op!
Had to cut my comment #21 short to try (and fail) to put my son to bed for a nap. ANYWAY, to continue…
If I were to summarize the message of that piece in prose, it might be, “9/11 was so fucked up that Santa started sobbing and had to go get a hug from Jesus.” If we take for granted that both are mythological figures — and who knows if the artist does, though any time I see Santa and Jesus in the same room, I immediately suspect the person putting them there knows what’s up — then for me, that evokes the same kind of funny-poignant feeling as The Onion’s “HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” headline.
If the artist doesn’t see it that way, then he/she is a douche, but I don’t care, because as I say artists don’t get to interpret their own work. I still think it’s funny and sad and an entertaining little piece.
$50.00 worth of 9/11 ka-ching combined with God-Bless-Our-Trailer-Park artistic merit. Two tasteless tastes that DON’T taste great together.
Seriously, this could make Jon McNaughton retch…or actually, maybe it’s some of his earlier work.
I think it was drawn to illustrate the word “simpering.”
It’s obvious that the consoled Santa represents America.
Gah! Html fail. What I meant to say:
It’s obvious that the consoled Santa represents America. After all, Uncle Sam and Santa Claus are one and the same.
http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/211034/november-23-2008/a-colbert-christmas–toby-keith-sings
From the artist’s website (via a comment at Boing Boing):
Don’t click the “Art” button there unless you’re really tough…
I have no idea why my comment keeps being eaten. One last time.
It’s obvious that the consoled Santa represents America. After all, Uncle Sam and Santa Claus are one and the same.
I suspect the video link is to blame for my comment not going through, so readers! I challenge you to find the source of that lyric!
Thread won!
*mad giggling*
*mad cackling*
*more mad giggling*
I like comments 19 and 28.
Look at the lack of footprints entering the scene. The artist is telling us that both Santa and Jesus can teleport.
I for one am convinced.
It isn’t. Just reload the page in a way that forces your computer to bypass the cache. The link in the “recent posts” list tends to work.
The red thing in the background is Santa’s hat? I took it for the hat of an elf whose body is being squeezed to pulp beneath the pedestal on which the stoney-faced angel of the Apocalyse is reading the Wall Street Journal. See the chubby cheeks the elf is blowing up beneath the crushing weight, just to the right of his red hat? Yes, this memento mori must hurt.
I can sympathize with the imagery.
If this is what our side is producing, I’m tempted to join the Taliban.
Rich #38 – Oh course Jesus and Santa can teleport.
DUH!
ooooooo. the two magic bearded men face to face.
hey how come nobody has yet made an RPG game centered on the bible. Now that’d be friggin’ awesome wouldn’t you think?? It’ll have everything a good ‘ol fantasy RPG should have! lol
Unfortunately, not a Poe – in fact it is just one of many such pieces of “art,” part of the whole “Weeping Santa” collection:
http://www.theweepingsanta.com/
I think I see numbers bleeding through some of the colors. At least it’s not painted on a plate with Jebus having that awful ubiquitous gaze. (My late aunt had Jebus on a Plate and those eyes always creeped me out.)
Is Jesus kneeling? If he’s not, dude has some wicked-short legs. And with a chest and shoulders that size, he could probably bench a TON.
It’s a Big ol’ Bear Christmas!
This should hang in every kitchen right next to the image of Saint Ernesto “Che” Guevara.
Rich Woods:
No, that’s when they carried, uh, each other.
Jay:
I think he’s sunk into the snow. Mini-Santa has tried and failed to pull him out.
The more I look at this picture, the creepier it gets. But I just… can’t… look… away.
Moral: “Children of America, my imaginary friend loves your imaginary friend all to bits.”
Okay, re: my comments #21 and #29… I see now that the artist is, indeed, a mega-douche. As per what I said earlier, however, artist’s do not get to interpret their own work. I still see this as a piece that you are supposed to laugh at, and then reflect on the enormity of an event that could make people seriously feel the kind of emotions that would inspire this kind of imagery.
I reiterate what I said before: Any proportionate response to America’s experience of 9/11 is inherently somewhat hilarious, because it must by necessity be so over-the-top as to render itself absurd. An honest response to 9/11 cannot possibly be tasteful.
So I still like this piece for its honesty. But I agree that if you don’t laugh at it, you’re a douche.
Nah, it’s all about how WE made Santa cry by not going out and shopping heavily as Our President said to boost the Holy Retail Bottom Line on Black Friday, and how the terrists won because without dropping our paychecks at Wal-Mart, why, it just isn’t Jesus’ Birthday.
This brings back memories. When I was in high school, I worked part-time at a small frame shop. People brought crap like this in the shop to be framed quite frequently – a lot of pictures of angels and Jesus hugging children. Anatomic accuracy and perspective always seemed to be lacking in these pictures. This though is clearly on a whole different plane of kitsch.
It was quite difficult to keep a straight face when assisting someone that would bring in similar “art”. I always tried to act enthusiastic about the picture and ask where they bought it. Usually the “art” was from a swap meet or a church craft bazaar. Shamefully, I admit that I probably would have said something like: “This clearly has to be put in a gold leaf frame – at $50 it deserves the best. And this isn’t just for the Holidays – that needs to be seen year round.”
Awww, fictional person comforting other fictional person. Isn’t that
sweetjuvenile.The beer-barfing rodent was ûberkitch until this.
It’s a little-known fact that on 9/11 terrorists hijacked Santa’s sleigh and flew it into the Chrysler Building. Since the sleigh is powered by magic reindeer, there was no fuel on board and hence no explosion and little damage to the structure, and the incident was overshadowed by the other events of that day.
OK, I made that up. But I have no other explanation for this hack painting. Also, I really resent being inspired to joke about 9/11.
I think Jesus is saying “I warned you, Santa! Being jolly and happy and giving gifts is fine when they’re kids, but if you want to keep them believing when they’re adults, then you need fear!”
Never knew Santa was so tiny.
@Glen
“Yay concern without lifting a finger to do anything.”
Give credit where credit is due, Glen. He “allowed” for steel beams that were assembled in the shape of a cross to stay in the shape of a cross. He “allowed” the reinforced southern end of the Mariott hotel to withstand the debris. That extra reinforced area allowed 14 people to survive. Come on, an omnipotent god shouldn’t be held to a higher standard than random chance.
I wonder if the artist would accept a commission to paint a picture of Jebus sitting in with the dogs playing poker?
What’s that in front of the statue in the background; is that a dead elf lying in the snow? Maybe that’s why Santa is crying; might have been his favorite elf.
Keep Al-Qaeda in Christmas!
or
Keep 9/11 in 12/25!
Can we take up a collection to buy the original for the Museum of Bad Art?
God bless Regretsy.
In the absence of god, I’ll bless Regretsy myself. Anyone in dire need of an emetic might check out Regretsy’s 9-11 GIF contest:
Here.
“There, there, Santa. I know you’re sad about all the loss of life on 9/11, but it’s all part of my grand plan that brings us closer to the rapture and my new reign on Earth.”
This Jesus would kick his ass . . .
http://www.news.com.au/world/artist-stephen-sawyer-gives-jesus-the-chuck-norris-makeover/story-e6frfkyi-1226127197890
I’m seeing a lot of mixed messages in this. The most perplexing is the price. Who would pay $50 for this piece of turd?
Creepy. Very creepy.
mouth. drops. open.
WTF??? Thousands? So this “artist” has made $50k+ from this painting?!
I think my mind will be permanently boggling now.
Wait, this painting is sincere? I honestly thought that the pairing of Jesus with Santa was meant in the way we atheists so often use it.
If you blink or close your eyes the weeping angel moves closer.
The elephant in the room: Why the fuck do Santa and Jesus care this much about 9/11? It’s not like they’re Americans. Or mortal. If they got all worked up over loss of human life, in our country or any other, they would have gone fucking insane well before weeping about 9-11, years after the fact, in the middle of winter. Also, Jesus is so large and out of proportion in this picture that I swear it is actually bigfoot wearing a Buddy Christ costume.
That’s awesome but not $54.00 worth of awesome.
I must admit it’s needs a weeping clown hobo to add to the fanfare.
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methinks they might have the wrong target audience. However coupled with Jesus, weeping Santa, 9/11 train wreck, it works as if I’d been magically transported to the the American Thinker website.
Wow… just wow… Only an idiot would pay 50 bucks for that abomination, which is probably why they put Jesus on there, knowing it would draw in the suckers! Really, apart from the terrible sense of perspective, awful painting technique, and the weird use of mythical characters to express emotion like a misguided parent trying to explain to little Timmy why his goldfish is “sleeping” upside down at the top of the fishbowl, it’s great… but not worth 50 bucks. Maybe if the artist bought me a stiff drink and gave me an angry handy I might consider taking it off their hands, just for the comedic value of it, but me paying the artist for it? No way in Moria!
And seriously, all the references to Doctor Who win. You all get +10 to all your stats for that! Fellow Whovian’s unite!
No Gods, No Masters
Cameron
You would have to change so very little with some creative Photoshopping to make Santa blow Jesus!
I understand that in the original painting, Santa is standing a few steps higher than Jesus and holding a sword.
“Look at the lack of footprints entering the scene. The artist is telling us that both Santa and Jesus can teleport.”
Haven’t you ever read Foot Prints in the sand? This is the same thing,it was all just too much so Gawd carried them in…sniff…wretch!
Just slowly back out of the room… and DON’T BLINK!!
This thing just begs to be hung prominently in my not-very clean, somewhat creepy downstairs bathroom.
Oh dear. I looked at her web page, and looked at the “art” link. Everything is crying! Santa, puppies, hobo clown, make it stop!
Christmas comes earlier every year.
Soon it will be like political campaigns. Happy New Year, now shop!
Oh for Benny’s sake. It’s incredible. Catholics pray to him, and he works miracles, up to and including healing the lame.
Somebody should officially propose him for sainthood, under the new, much easier rules. And somebody else should make tons and tons of popcorn.
Hey, some of the Copts are uniates. Don’t they need a patron saint of the revolutionaries?
FIFTY FUCKING DOLLARS? Sold in the thousands?
I need to reconsider my career choices.
All that’s missing is the glitter.
This is almost as bad as the bloody nail T-shirt with the motto “His death was not pointless” on it. Almost.
Come unto Big Butter Jesus, all you who are heavy laden.
ICK! You can’t see Jesus’ left hand. But I think he’s trying to undo santas nelt buckle. He’s going for a reach around!
Uh oh, guys,turn your faces away. Remember, the image of an angel is an angel. :)
You gotta be kidding me…
Where are my fucking crayons?
@jamessweet – no. There are definitely good works of art that express enormities. I give you Goya’s disasters of war, and Guernica.
I love Nelson Muntz’s version.
Pierce R. butler@ comment 34…
Agh!! Damn you. I couldn’t resist. I pressed the Art tab.. My eyes are freaking burning!!
The good news is that it appears that they both appear to blinking.
Surely this work of art cries out to be painted on black velvet.
Jebus’s head is like double the size of Santa’s. He’s a deformed hunch-backed mutant.
Wow! You may have thought after years of surfing the net you’ve seen the worst of bad taste and then this pops up.
Incredible.
Look at that funny discoloration around Santa… obviously ‘shopped out the Unicorn to put him in there. That’d explain the scale being all wrong and the missing hand, too.
Um, call me a cynic – but looking at the artist’s site it strikes me as a bit of a one-two suckerpunch deal.
I mean, who’s going to just buy the sad-weepy-puppy-seperation picture without also then getting the follow-up happy-weepy-puppy-reunion picture? Or the weepy-santa-babby-jeebus picture without then getting the consoling-baby-jeebus-weepy-santa picture?
Sounds like there’s money to be made in this religion thing – why’d no-one ever tell me that before!?
Santa’s crying because giant deformed Jebus snuck up behind and scared the fuckin shit out of him!
Aha ha!! Ok, I’m done.
Santa’s crying because giant deformed Jebus snuck up behind and scared the fuckin shit out of him.
Ahh ha ha! Ok, I’m done.
No, no, this isn’t “The Weeping Santa” which has sold thousands, this is “Remembering”. “The Weeping Santa” is the top picture here. At least that one isn’t horribly out of proportion…
Platypus@#4:
That was rather rude! Jesus’ shoulder is clearly thrust forward so he can rest his head on it. If your head was as heavy as his must be (given the scale of the scene as HappyHead@#6 describes), you’d need to rest your head on your shoulder too!
Now if only I could figure out where his lower legs went…
Why should we believe you this time?
i thought the angel was the tooth fairy.
and i thought santa was jesus’ dad
im all messed up today
Why is Santa blowing his nose on the flag?
I thought Americans were a bit sensitive about that kind of thing… (well, at least the demographic I’d think likely to buy a piece of art featuring the flag and santa?)
… Bleeeeaaaaaarghhhhh !
It looks exactly like what Dolores Umbridge would put on her walls. So simpering it borders on creepy.
And, I am a mostly self-taught painter too, but the thing is I could do immensely better than this at the age of 14 – especially when trying to paint or draw humans. Even if I did sort of paint fairly kitch stuff, including scenes from Star Wars.
@66 Man, Jesus is a right bastard stealing a dude’s fix.
There are crying hobo clowns.
The more I look at this picture, the more I begin to suspect that it was originally several other pictures that were stitched together poorly with photoshop or something. It would explain why Giant Jesus’ entire right shoulder and arm are not only out of proportion with the rest of his body, but in fact are facing a different direction. If you put your hand over that area of G.J., he’s facing mostly to the left side – and if you only look at that part, it’s from someone who is smaller, and facing directly forward. The shading style and colors are similar, so probably from the same source, but definitely not the same original picture.
Kind of leads to the question of is this a “painting”, or a “print”? Somehow I suspect print is the case, and if you look hard enough, you’ll find nearly every part of this picture in some other, much better done picture.
My first emotion on seeing this picture was just confusion, and then I read this comment.
But now I realise that Santa and Jesus are crying because 9/11 was the end for both of them. Jesus because people started to realise just how dangerous religion really is, and Santa because the wars in the Middle East have bankrupted the USA and now no one can afford Xmas prezzies.
Christians have no sense of perspective. Who knew…
myeck waters says:
13 September 2011 at 3:53 pm
I understand that in the original painting, Santa is standing a few steps higher than Jesus and holding a sword.
WIN!!!
All these years and I’m finally let down. No one got it right:
It is quite clearly a narrative about how 9/11 screwed up flying, forever. Santa can no longer fly because of the fucked up and random TSA guidelines. So now he’s crying to Jesus because he’s equally as powerless as Jesus.
On a side note, fuck whoever pointed out Jesus’ missing left hand. I checked for it and the position of which makes the scene far out creepy. Jesus’ missing left hand is in a position to be strategically slipped in and…well, maybe the 9/11 memorial is to divert the viewer from noticing that Jesus is diddling Santa. Replace Jesus with a Priest and Santa with an altar boy. Then shudder.
Is that the Black Angel of Iowa City? Why is Jesus comforting a weeping Santa in Iowa City?
I am so very creeped out by that whole site I can’t even think of anything funny to say.
Yuuuuuccccccckkkkkk…..
I’m pretty convinced that’s not a Stone Angel, rather a 9/11 Commemorative Pez dispenser.
It’s obvious what happened. Santa’s sleigh crashed into Jesus riding a giant stone angel with a wierd number plate, killing Santa’s little elf. You can see the body in front of the angel.
Jesus got off his giant stone angel, walked over through the snow (note the footprints) and is now comforting a grieving Santa while wondering how to explain this to the cops. Any moment now he’s going to offer Santa a drink to calm him down, turn some of the snow into whiskey, and let the poor bastard pump his blood alcohol level up…
Barf
Hah! Well, so much for you art snobs. I think it’s great.
Whatchoosay – an adult painted it? Are you sure?
It’s a bad sign when the art is so bad that you’re not sure if it was meant to be satirical.
“…a self-taught artist…” Yeah, got one of those in my family. Kind of like religion, get the emotions going and everything else just goes right south, never to be seen again, including talent.
The “art” is just so bad it can’t be meant to be satirical, just has to be sincere. Sincerely horrible.
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