All hail our new reptilian overlord

Well, it was bound to happen, as Travis Irvine so ably points out in this pre-election video — both Obama and Romney are reptilians, humanoid lizards, so no matter how the election panned out the new leader of the free world was bound to be a lizard person.

Don’t blame me, I voted for Kodos. Err, I mean, I’m Canadian and couldn’t vote.

Epic Rap Battles: Mitt Romney vs Barack Obama

Guess I should post this before it’s no longer relevant. NicePeter’s run-in as Abe Lincoln really made this one, though that Obama impersonator is awesome as always. How many videos has this guy been in? I’ve seen him like a dozen times now.

For what it’s worth, the Frank Sinatra vs Freddy Mercury battle was far and away better than this one. Mostly because Mercury easily and handily won, as well he should. You need to see it for the Tay Zonday cameo as Sammy Davis Jr.

The rest are here. You can apparently download the mp3s and get merch if you’re so inclined. I can’t say I’m not considering it.

Linus Torvalds on Mitt Romney and Mormonism

You folks are going to LOVE this one.

On Mitt’s “joke” that he doesn’t know why airplane windows don’t open and how that’s a big problem when there’s an electrical fire in the cabin, Linus Torvalds — Linux’s progenitor and Grand Poobah — had a few words to say on Google+.

He really seems to be a f*cking moron.

I suspect he’d crate his dog on top of the aircraft too. Because what could possibly go wrong?

He followed up:

Ok, since I publicly called the guy a f*cking moron, I guess I should also publicly follow up: it does seem Romney was joking.

Whew.

I dunno. I have my doubts it was really a joke — sure, give him the benefit of the doubt, but the way he said it was patently ridiculous and, even if intentional, terribly formed and terribly premised. Granted, I’m horrid at jokes off-the-cuff myself most days. But this depends on making yourself look way too uneducated, illogical and simple-minded to be leader of the free world. So I can’t buy it, unless Mitt — the self-aggrandizing fucker that he is — goes for self-deprecating humour in a deadpan.

But regardless of that incident’s joke status, Torvalds also said the following about Mormonism:
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William Tapley writes Mitt Romney’s new campaign jingle

You might know him as the Third Eagle of the Apocalypse, the Co-Prophet of the End Times, and/or an absolutely unhinged religious conspiracy theorist. And now you’ll all know him as the bard behind Mitt Romney’s new campaign jingle. Just as soon as Romney picks it up and splashes it across his commercials.

A hero in Tapley’s mind. Well, that tells us everything we need to know about Romney’s chances.

Rush Limbaugh as The Penguin explains the Bat-Conspiracy against Romney

You have to admit, Oswald Cobblepot is actually significantly more sane-sounding than this normally. Jimmy Kimmel pretty much picked the perfect clips to show how ridiculous Limbaugh’s accusations are, because the clips of Bane are from an episode that first aired September 10, 1994. If there was a secret plot to make Mitt Romney look stupid and evil, it would have had to hatch eighteen years ago.

This evil villain was even in Batman and Robin, which I’m sure you’ve all scrubbed from your memories for Bane being such an ineffectual villain and for the existence of Bat-nipples. And yet somehow this was a plot against Romney — despite the fact that, when the first trailers for The Dark Knight Rises were showing up, we still thought Newt Fucking Gingrich was going to be Obama’s opponent.

Anyway, it’s ridiculous to say anything in the Batman mythology is politically tilted against Republicans in any way, frankly — it’s one long capitalist power fantasy. It’s Objectivism writ large, where the rich make the rules and personally destroy through physical violence and psychological terrorism any deviance from the script. Not that those fantastic elements don’t make for an entertaining story, mind you. I love the hell out of the Batman mythology, to be perfectly frank, even despite (and in some cases because of) it being so diametrically opposed to many of my own personal ideologies.

(Yes, I’ve heard about the theatre shooting. That’ll be a different post, please and thanks.)