Memo to Americans: Canadians exist, Bigfoot doesn’t

A shocking and horrible poll published by Angus Reid declares, “Americans more likely to believe in Bigfoot than Canadians”.

I know you folks might never see us very often — we haven’t had a war with you in a very long time, and I can understand why you might be inclined to forget about us given our cultural contributions have included Celine Dion and Justin Bieber. But I’m telling you, we exist. We don’t even have flip-top heads, like your Sunday night educational programming “South Park” might lead you to believe. Hockey was invented here. We make good beer.

Wait, what? That’s not what the survey says? Hang on. Knew I shoulda read it before starting this post. *grumble grumble*
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Mock The Movie: Night of the Demon transcript

I had to sit this movie out, sadly, owing once again to my ridiculously full work schedule. (Hey, I’ll keep harping on about it as long as it keeps happening.) Looks like I missed one hell of a mockable movie! This is sad to me, because I’m evidently one twisted, twisted soul. What’s also sad is, owing to an issue with my Linux box that I didn’t notice immediately, since I was busy with work, I apparently lost the first twelve minutes of the mockery. And Twitter evidently purges old @-replys that aren’t on a hashtag after a certain period of time, so they’re simply missing now. It’s okay though — the movie really gets started at the twelve minute mark, as apparently that’s the first sex scene. As well as the first death scene. You’d pretty much be fast-forwarding to that point anyway!

Once I get a spare hour and a half, I plan on watching this movie to catch up with my fellow mockers. I’ll also have the benefit of doing so with the mockery in-line, via Sky Captain CompulsoryAccount7746’s subtitle conversion script. I still need to cannibalize the script and integrate it into my current mockery-scraping engine eventually. For now, the script as-delivered pretty much requires that I post it first and convert to subtitles afterward. So, subtitle files to follow.
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Mock The Movie Supercharged!

Good news, MtM fans — all three of you! We’ve decided on four new movies, to be mocked starting this Thursday and every two weeks thereafter. That’s right, we’re gonna come at you like a spider monkey on crack laced with caffeine (and a tiny bit of prozac to keep from having a heart attack)! Final order is up in the air, but it looks like we’ll be doing the following first:

Frankenstein (2004)
Frankenstein movie poster
Detective Carson O’Conner and her partner Detective Michael Sloane are investigating murders of a serial-killer that mutilates and removes the internal organs of the victims. When they meet the mysterious and macabre Deucalion, they are informed that Dr. Frankenstein is alive with a legion of followers, using the name of Dr. Victor Helios.

Yes, that’s right, a modern-day sequel to Mary Shelley’s original oeuvre, a made-for-TV movie by USA Network. Distribution might be a bit difficult, as it’s still in copyright, so you might have to go to region-locked services like Hulu or Netflix. It will be an exercise for the participant to obtain this one. Others are easier to get though.
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