1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:07,000 ####### 2 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:19,000 tragedyman: Late start. Almost forgot. But this stars Phyllis Diller? Yikes. 3 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:27,000 drskyskull: Nooooo! They're using one of my favorite Edvard Grieg pieces for the intro! #ruinedforever 4 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:48,000 DrRubidium: Um, you spelled skillful wrong :D 5 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:56,000 szvan: Off to a good start with "the beautiful harmony of thought." 6 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:05,000 drskyskull: "... duty to establish quarantine against fear." Could someone notify the GOP of this? 7 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:16,000 lousycanuck: It's the duty of every man and woman to establish a quarantine of fear by replacing it with NUCLEAR WEAPONRY. 8 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:36,000 tragedyman: This movie must be mandatory for all Psych students, right? 9 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:43,000 szvan: Of course all criminals suffer from a mental disease...when you diagnose criminality as a mental disease. 10 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:50,000 BenZvan: Hang on while I sharpen this knife. You check the still while I do what I was going to do. 11 00:01:55,000 --> 00:02:01,000 DrRubidium: there's always a rack of test tubes! 12 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:19,000 lousycanuck: "Okay, using this syringe, you put lime into coconut... and then drink it all up." 13 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:30,000 DrRubidium: I'm already ready for Maxwell to die 14 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:41,000 tragedyman: 02:35 - DundunDUN! 15 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:10,000 drskyskull: This "doctor" is, like, every grad student & postdoc's worst nightmare. 16 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:15,000 DrRubidium: well, bearded guy HAS to go 17 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:23,000 drskyskull: *music* I would do anyyyything for you... but I won't do dead people! 18 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:30,000 tragedyman: 03:20 - Ethics, shmethics. 19 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:59,000 BenZvan: This movie sounds like something I would have written...then I'd decide I couldn't write and go into photography. 20 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:19,000 DrRubidium: Maxwell, why you gotta hate on the cat? 21 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:24,000 szvan: Some animals were highly annoyed in the making of this movie. 22 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:36,000 drskyskull: "Once a ham, always a ham." This is written like Shakespeare!!!! 23 00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:41,000 tragedyman: 04:25 - "Once a ham. Always a ham." But enough about the cast. 24 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:08,000 szvan: "In time, *you* may become a pompous windbag." 25 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:18,000 lousycanuck: And so the game of cat and mouse begins. Literally. 26 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:27,000 tragedyman: 05:10 - Because all morgues have rat problems. 27 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:04,000 DrRubidium: just what this movie needs - a monocle! 28 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:11,000 BenZvan: that was either 'Mary, I'll cure ya' or an homage to Mary Curie. 29 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:28,000 drskyskull: @lousycanuck "This proves my theory - the hearts of the dead do not beat!" #theycalledmemad! 30 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:40,000 lousycanuck: "Wait for it... wait for it... yup, the dead girl still doesn't have a heartbeat." 31 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:52,000 szvan: "We'll have to work fast. I'll start rubbing her now." 32 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:33,000 drskyskull: What's he doing - trying to tear her arm off? #makeawish 33 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:55,000 DrRubidium: ah yes, a creepy reference to necrophilia 34 00:07:54,000 --> 00:08:00,000 tragedyman: 07:20 - Necrophilia. Nice. 35 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:05,000 lousycanuck: "Special autopsy? But I hardly even know her!" 36 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:26,000 lousycanuck: Oh, THAT'S why she's dead,there's no oxygen in that room! Luckily the cast is able to breathe bad acting, of which the room is full. 37 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:05,000 lousycanuck: Maniac: The Most Incomprehensible Mush-Mouthed Movie Ever Made! 38 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:13,000 drskyskull: Always a sign of a good movie - characters sitting around a lot talking to one another #sarcasm #exceptionisPulpFiction 39 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:20,000 DrRubidium: what are the Muppet's Statler and Waldorf doing in this movie?! 40 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:27,000 szvan: "Yes, I did establish my career in silent films, mumble, mumble. Why do you ask?" 41 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:34,000 tragedyman: 09:00 - The drunk aide reminds me of a slurring, bald Jack Elam. 42 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:23,000 drskyskull: Maybe the mad scientist should come up with a cure for the mumbles. 43 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:40,000 DrRubidium: this is supposed to be a single cohesive movie, right? 44 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:32,000 drskyskull: Chase bank is advertising for this movie. Another reason to hate the banks. 45 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:22,000 szvan: Oh, there's the evil laughter. I was wondering where that was. 46 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:28,000 drskyskull: "No, I didn't get my PhD in acting - why do you ask?" 47 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:29,000 lousycanuck: "IT WILL BE MY SUPREME ACCOMPLISHMENT! Right after my glorious beard." 48 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:34,000 DrRubidium: OK, that was an awesome evil laugh #bwahahahahahah 49 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:47,000 drskyskull: "I don't care vere you get it - try the undertaker, WalMart, Whole Foods!" 50 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:18,000 DrRubidium: seriously, Maxwell needs to die 51 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:32,000 lousycanuck: Woooo! Cat fight! Worth the price of admission! 52 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:37,000 drskyskull: I guarantee that the filmmakers just happened to see two cats fighting and thought, "Awesome! Put it in the film!!!" 53 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:48,000 tragedyman: 13:00 - Cat fight. Because the filmmaker needed to pad out the runtime of this movie. 54 00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:04,000 szvan: Do the inspectors require tunnels in all undertakers' offices, or is it optional? 55 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:30,000 BenZvan: I don't know what's going on, but that guy is very sad. Maybe he just heard that Steve Jobs died? 56 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:36,000 drskyskull: @BenZvan He *does* look a bit like the Woz... 57 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:41,000 szvan: Huh. Evil crying. That's a new one. 58 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:46,000 lousycanuck: Wow, the doctor sure does take minor setbacks extraordinarily hard. 59 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:51,000 rvitelli: @lousycanuck "Wow, the doctor sure does take minor setbacks extraordinarily hard. " Blame medical school. 60 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:17,000 DrRubidium: anyone else think the doc cuckoo for Coca Puffs? #bwahahahahah 61 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:46,000 BenZvan: Hey...there's a gun in this drawer and that guy seems very sad. Solution: meet problem. 62 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:53,000 lousycanuck: "YOU WILL LIVE! AHAHAHA!" "Uh, dude, I'm already alive here. And now you aren't." 63 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:58,000 tragedyman: 15:40 - His laughter indicates how sane he is. 64 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:03,000 drskyskull: "Oh, my goodness... it just went off prematurely... this never usually happens to me, I swear!" 65 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:09,000 szvan: "I will now draw this weapon very slowly out of this drawer so you have time to get good and freaked out. Fear my evil plan!" 66 00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:42,000 tragedyman: 16:00 - Thanks for that information. I didn't realize he might have been mentally ill. 67 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:18,000 DrRubidium: "Just in case you hadn't figured it out, Maxwell is fucking crazy" 68 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:25,000 lousycanuck: "I murdered my benefactor! Racked with guilt now! Ignoring, of course, the fact that he was going to mad science me to death." 69 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:43,000 drskyskull: Sign number 1 that you're crazy: Your internal monologue goes external. 70 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:04,000 szvan: Careful, kids. Committing murder results in demonic possession. 71 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:07,000 lousycanuck: Who needs to go to medical school to assume the identity of a doctor? Just act like him! You know, poorly. 72 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:14,000 drskyskull: *flipping through papers frantically* Oh, crap, what page of the script are we on? 73 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:19,000 tragedyman: @drskyskull There's a script to this? Really? 74 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:38,000 DrRubidium: ...and here is where the movie takes a real turn. For the even worse 75 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:17,000 drskyskull: "He's having horrible hallucinations? What a coincidence - so am I!" 76 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:22,000 tragedyman: 19:20 - Name-dropping Poe? Isn't that a bit too high-brow for this film? 77 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:10,000 drskyskull: I hope they paid Maxwell extra salary, considering he has to play his own Greek chorus. 78 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:30,000 DrRubidium: ...and there is the tenuous Edgar Allan Poe connection 79 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:37,000 szvan: Um, dude, I'm pretty sure the doc had wilder hair than you did. Cutting it ain't gonna help. 80 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:44,000 lousycanuck: A toolchest! Just what I need to complete my transformation! Let's see... a little trim here... a little montage there... PERFECT! 81 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:25,000 drskyskull: His disguise is vaguely reminiscent of the horrible cross-breeding of Paul Bunyan and CarrotTop. 82 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:52,000 szvan: "I will be a great man! Just after I put on this thing that looks like a straightjacket!" 83 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:59,000 DrRubidium: that is the worse make-over I've ever seen 84 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:13,000 BenZvan: I can't figure out how to move the plot forward so I'll speak directly to the camera, then make the audience read. 85 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:19,000 lousycanuck: "There is marked failure of memory, poor retention, marked failure of memory, and poor retention." 86 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:29,000 tragedyman: 22:20 - Modern analysis techniques. 87 00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:03,000 drskyskull: "Let's see here... well, that arm will have to come off." 88 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:11,000 szvan: Strangely, he looked more like the doc before the fake mustache. 89 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:34,000 drskyskull: Did he say "No, not that" or "No, fuck that"? 90 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:40,000 lousycanuck: "Super adrenaline. No, not that. How about ULTRA-adrenaline?" 91 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:46,000 BenZvan: Super Adrenaline....no...I'll use water... 92 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:06,000 tragedyman: 24:00 - It never occurred to our hero that he grabbed the WRONG SIZE SYRINGE? 93 00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:11,000 drskyskull: @tragedyman I assume you're using the term "hero" in the loosest possible sense? 94 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:16,000 tragedyman: @drskyskull Well, yes. 95 00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:04,000 tragedyman: 25:00 - Once a ham, always a ham. 96 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:10,000 BenZvan: "fire in my brain...with the brain...and the fire....and the brain..." 97 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:15,000 szvan: "The fire! It stabs me!" Um.... 98 00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:22,000 drskyskull: "I can't stand this torture!" He suddenly became acutely aware of the film he is in! 99 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:27,000 lousycanuck: He's awfully lucid for someone being tortured by mainlining super-adrenaline. 100 00:25:54,000 --> 00:26:00,000 lousycanuck: "Nonono, down Dino, down boy, DOWN!" 101 00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:03,000 szvan: "What was in that syringe? It turned him into Jimmy Fallon!" 102 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:08,000 tragedyman: 26:00 - Bad Tasmanian Devil impression. 103 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:50,000 tragedyman: 26:45 - Who are you going to believe: me, or your crazy eyes? 104 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:09,000 drskyskull: That has to be the best excuse for not calling the police I've ever heard! "I wanted to experiment on him!" 105 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:21,000 BenZvan: The fire in my brain...and the fire...and my brain...and the fire... 106 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:36,000 tragedyman: 27:30 - Female nipples. Because this movie was boring up until now. 107 00:27:56,000 --> 00:28:02,000 lousycanuck: "I think we speak the same language, am I right?" "Que?" 108 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:07,000 DrRubidium: this is the worst acting I've seen since Showgirls 109 00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:27,000 drskyskull: Shouldn't this film be called, "Maniac(s)"? 110 00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:28,000 lousycanuck: "You see my cats there, eh, Ralphie-boy?" 111 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:08,000 szvan: Human-heart cat toy. Wheee! 112 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:36,000 lousycanuck: "I'll burn the body! No, I can't do that. The foyer! I mean basement." 113 00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:42,000 DrRubidium: nobody's noticed the doc's a fake? REALLY?! 114 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:09,000 drskyskull: *Removing bricks* "Oh, there's that Cask of Amontillado I lost all those years ago!" 115 00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:33,000 DrRubidium: Is it just me, or is Maxwell's accent oscillating between Swedish, Czechoslovakian and German? 116 00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:58,000 BenZvan: 'My cat was severely annoyed in the watching of this movie.' 117 00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:11,000 tragedyman: 32:00 - Random Act Of Violence Against A Cat! 118 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:17,000 DrRubidium: He killed the cat?! That damn cat was the only living creature in this movie I liked! 119 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:43,000 lousycanuck: Om nom cat eye. Because, you know, why not? Biomass is biomass. 120 00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:54,000 DrRubidium: ahhh...the ol' body in the wall trick. That always works 121 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:59,000 lousycanuck: "Oh dammit, these brick walls never go back together the same way twice." 122 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:15,000 drskyskull: "Paranoiac" Oh, shit - are they talking about me? 123 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:26,000 tragedyman: 33:20 - I wonder what silent film the Hell footage came from? 124 00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:52,000 szvan: Luckily, no one ever really looks at mortar anyway. 125 00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:26,000 BenZvan: I'm against gay marriage because those queers brought a dead dog back to life up there once 126 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:33,000 tragedyman: 34:20 - That must be the oddest random conversation ever. 127 00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:32,000 tragedyman: 36:00 - Nobody's called Animal Care & Control on this guy yet? 128 00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:54,000 drskyskull: "Cats eat rats." What he learned before dropping out of grade school biology. 129 00:36:02,000 --> 00:36:08,000 DrRubidium: rats, cats, cats, rats... creepy Dr. Seuss 130 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:17,000 szvan: Someone needs to tell the scriptwriters the difference between characters and *characters*. 131 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:28,000 tragedyman: 36:20 - Wait - Maxwell was married?!? 132 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:53,000 BenZvan: I may not be decent but I'm sure going to be clean. *darn!* 133 00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:18,000 tragedyman: 37:10 - Did that actress have an unfortunate accident in a helium factory before her Hollywood career? 134 00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:23,000 drskyskull: I think their bedroom has unknowingly been filled with helium. 135 00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:38,000 BenZvan: Ha ha ha ha ha...she's pressing her underpants...ha ha ha...pressing business...get it? huh? huh? I kill me. 136 00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:16,000 lousycanuck: La Conkaroacha? 137 00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:40,000 szvan: I'd complain about this movie's view of women, but given what I've got to compare it to.... 138 00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:47,000 BenZvan: @szvan at least the women in this movie can almost act. 139 00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:54,000 DrRubidium: what is the point of this entire scene involving the showgirls? Are they going to die horribly soon? 140 00:38:55,000 --> 00:39:01,000 lousycanuck: Thankfully this is in public domain, or Disney would be going after the Minnie Mouse ripoff. 141 00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:08,000 drskyskull: @lousycanuck See, I thought this had evolved into "Betty Boop versus the Maniac" 142 00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:48,000 BenZvan: Hey...I wonder if he's still 'with' that goofy professor... 143 00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:03,000 tragedyman: 39:45 - Some wife. She can't even recognize her own husband standing in front of her? 144 00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:12,000 drskyskull: Wasn't there an insane, murderous rapist on the loose a while ago? Did he fall down a well? 145 00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:19,000 BenZvan: @drskyskull Nobody really worries about insane, murderous rapists these days. 146 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:32,000 lousycanuck: During the "mixed phase", you prefer mixed drinks. 147 00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:45,000 szvan: Oh! Here's our problem. This isn't a feature film. It's a DSM training film! Of course, it's still awful. 148 00:40:57,000 --> 00:41:03,000 BenZvan: @DrRubidium Just making the connection to Showgirls. It's future allusion. 149 00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:12,000 BenZvan: Since when does jabbing someone in the eye quiet them?!!! 150 00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:14,000 BenZvan: you wanna buy a crazy woman? I've got one in the other room I've been tweeting...I mean treating... 151 00:44:54,000 --> 00:45:00,000 lousycanuck: Oh boy, setting up for the famous Syringe Duel scene. Throwing syringes at one another from ten paces. 152 00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:57,000 lousycanuck: And after having dropped their syringes, the women start channeling the cats from earlier. They WERE the best actors after all. 153 00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:33,000 szvan: You see, women don't really know how to fight, just how to tear each other's clothes off. 154 00:46:48,000 --> 00:46:54,000 tragedyman: 46:30 - Now that they've ripped each other's clothes off, shouldn't they have started kissing? 155 00:46:55,000 --> 00:47:01,000 drskyskull: We interrupt this life-or-death struggle to show you this image of a bird. 156 00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:06,000 DrRubidium: this movie just took on a Dali-esque level of abstract weirdness usually only seen in underground Romanian alt-films :-0 157 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:50,000 tragedyman: 47:40 - "You're crazy! What kind of a place is this?" We should have asked that at the beginning of this film. 158 00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:34,000 BenZvan: These bricks sound like cats! That's suspicious! Get him! 159 00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:48,000 szvan: Oh, so *now* you figure out he's crazy. 160 00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:11,000 drskyskull: "Insanity is our defense against a world..." Speak for yourself, narrator!!! 161 00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:19,000 tragedyman: 49:00 - This is what makes the film informational, and excuses the nudity, cat fighting & bad acting. 162 00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:38,000 szvan: "Maniac" brought to you by the team that created "Eugenics." 163 00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:45,000 BenZvan: There are many people of unsound mind who find one particular thing unbearable...like this movie for example. 164 00:49:51,000 --> 00:49:57,000 lousycanuck: Why must they end the music so abruptly on those psych flash cards? 165 00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:43,000 lousycanuck: The lesson: being a Vaudevillian actor makes you go crazy crazy. 166 00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:51,000 drskyskull: "I thought the movie was over... how long do I have to keep holding up my arms?" 167 00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:51,000 lousycanuck: I can't help but feel spoiled by having seen Rocketship X-M before this. 168 00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:06,000 drskyskull: "Maniac" is like "Silence of the Lambs", if Hannibal Lector were played by Jim Carrey. 169 00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:39,000 lousycanuck: To clarify, I don't mean Rocketship X-M is a direct sequel of Maniac. But if it was, there'd be a movie in between, I think. 170 00:54:56,000 --> 00:55:02,000 szvan: And now for video games, because the story line is infinitely better. 171 01:01:27,000 --> 01:01:33,000 drskyskull: Now that I'm totally desensitized to absurdity, time to catch the end of "RoadHouse" on AMC.