#DIYSciZone Act of Whimsy: Battlefield Earth transcript #GGC16

As part of the DIY Science Zone fundraising for Geek Girl Con, we set a number of fundraising goals wherein our amateur and professional scientists offer self-torture as incentive. This year I’ll be reprising my demos on randomness and probability, only this time I’ll be doing it in context of Zombie Dice, as a tie-in with the Gaming Zone. This is going to be a ton of fun! And brains. Lots of brains.

DIY Science Zone logo

As part of our $1500 fundraising goal, I agreed to live-tweet Battlefield Earth. Whaaaaaat a stinker. A meandering mess of displays of every baser human instinct, written by that same guy who founded that one religion. You know the one.

A few Mock The Movie stalwarts voluntarily threw themselves on my pyre in solidarity. I am Hashtag-Blessed to find myself among such friends and/or fellow masochists.

Once the fundraiser hits $3000, this year I’ll be doing a twitch stream long-play of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for NES. I haven’t played it in at least fifteen years. I promise I’ll be rusty as hell and will likely die a lot. Hooray! If you want to help get us there, here’s the donation form. We bring science demos to kids on an all-volunteer basis, and the cost helps pay for this zone — without this annual fundraising, we couldn’t continue this excellent annual tradition of getting the kids who visit Geek Girl Con excited about STEM fields!

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#DIYSciZone Act of Whimsy: Battlefield Earth transcript #GGC16
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Mock the Movie: Tough And Deadly transcript

Okay, so let’s start trying to get this archive back up to date. I have no idea how long it’ll be before I get all the transcripts up, but, here you are: Tough And Deadly, a Billy Blanks and Roddy Piper joint, brackets TM close brackets.

As this is their second outing together, they have apparently developed something of a rapport with one another that none of the mockers could help but appreciate. I recall this as being a fun movie and something of a palate cleanser after Ray Burks subjected me to Glitter.

Mock date August 6th, 2015.

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Mock the Movie: Tough And Deadly transcript

Frivolous Friday: the Cadillac of Boxed Mac And Cheese

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A Canadian favourite. President's Choice White Cheddar Deluxe Macaroni and Cheese Dinner

Folks, that is what I am having for lunch today. Only Canadians or Canadian-adjacent people know the comparative glory of this particular no-name-brand boxed mac and cheese. If Kraft Dinner ain’t your thing, this is not an alternative to take lightly.

I order it from Canada by the case.

Yes, seriously.

And no, before you ask, the President’s Choice imprimateur shouldn’t be Prime Minister, because it’s the president of the grocery company they’re referring to. This is the Loblaws (and other grocery chains) store brand.

Frivolous Friday: the Cadillac of Boxed Mac And Cheese

Biting political satire!

I did what I could. My skills are modest at best.

Donald Trump in the iconic Benito Mussolini SI SI SI billboard

No but seriously, dude’s a straight-up fascist, and a big chunk of your country is creaming itself with joy at the prospect.

When President Trump takes office, I fully expect that I’ll be marked an enemy of the state and I’ll have to beat a hasty retreat, all because I ‘shopped something mean and am jealous and a yooge loser.

Biting political satire!

"Please don’t make the super suit green. OR ANIMATED!"

My gods. I might actually have faith that they’re about to get Deadpool right.

But here’s the thing. This is not for kids, it is super violent, and it is probably going to be problematic as all hell. I know I’m still going to love it though. (It’s okay to enjoy problematic things as long as you recognize them as such.)

So, below the fold the video goes. Along with the trailer’s trailer.
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"Please don’t make the super suit green. OR ANIMATED!"

GGC 2015 #DIYSciZone: Mock the Movie Overtime: Glitter transcript

Glob help me, but I watched this movie. I watched it beginning to end. Alone.

So alone.

The things I do for science.

Please go give money to Geek Girl Con’s DIY Science Zone, because when we reach $3500, I reach my next goal of public self-flagellation: I will live-stream Zelda 2: The Adventure of Link beginning to end. Probably over two weekends. All of this so I can go teach kids about displacement and buoyancy!

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GGC 2015 #DIYSciZone: Mock the Movie Overtime: Glitter transcript

Pause for station identification

I have the Mock The Movie transcripts still to finish — CA7746 is sending me subtitle files galore, and I have yet to upload them because they’re always a bit of a pain to attach within WordPress and link appropriately. (The fact that I have to upload them as .txt instead of .srt is not the least problem.)

After that, as promised, I’ll be doing short reviews of my cornucopia of Steam games, starting with, oh, let’s say Mercenary Kings. And don’t worry, they’ll be reviews from my Evil SJW Perspective.

In the meantime, let me remind you where you are.

Welcome to Lousy Canuck.

I like turtles.

Pause for station identification

Mock The Movie: Airplane Vs. Volcano transcript

Dean Cain, TV’s SuperClark, has a troubled past and an airplane full of people to save. He saves very few of them, and does very little to actually control the plane on autopilot, but is still treated as a goddamn hero for some reason. And he kisses Robin Givens. SIGH.

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Mock The Movie: Airplane Vs. Volcano transcript