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Crommunist imagines Macklemore and Tim Wise as a buddy cop story

Absolutely brilliant. What an inspiring story of overcoming adversity in the face of anti-white bigotry!

(ELMORE and WISER sit at a dimly-lit bar, drinks in front of them. Music by Kenny G plays in the background. The bar is mostly empty, save for a few regular patrons.)

ELMORE: I don’t get you, Wiser. You’ve been on the force for 20 years, but you’re still front line. Why not write the sergeant’s exam? Why not try to move up the ladder?

WISER: (Sighs) You still don’t get it, kid. The system is rigged against guys like us. You think I haven’t written that exam? You think I want to be stuck in the same place? It’s all bullshit politics.

ELMORE: What do you mean?

WISER: I used to be like you, Elmore. I used to believe that the system could treat folks like you and me fairly, if we played by the rules. But all that changed when the mayor hired the first black police commissioner. At first I thought it was a great step. Clear out some of the old racists, get some new blood in the chain of command. Really change the force, you know?

ELMORE: So what happened?

WISER: The new commissioner turned out to be just as racist as the old one. The first thing he did was appoint a deputy. You know what colour that deputy was? Black. Then when it was time for a new Internal Affairs chief, the commissioner put forward a list of recommendations. Not a white man on the list.

ELMORE: I can’t… I can’t believe it

WISER: Believe it. Face it, Elmore. The tables have turned. Now guys like you and me are riding at the back of the bus, while the commissioner puts all his buddies in all the positions of authority.

Read more. Now.

Comments

  1. sugarfrosted says

    I didn’t know where else to put this, but I was on Dispatches and I got an ad for a site asking me to install what I assume is spyware on my android phone. It had a dialogue box and everything.

    “Free Clean master”

  2. says

    @3: I’ll pass that along to the powers-that-be. We’d actually told our ad folks to turn off *all* popups on mobile devices — however, it seems as though some ad campaigns are actually allowing those horrible ads with fake mobile popups despite our best efforts. It could very well be the malicious ones are actually embedding JS code in their ads specifically to cause this sort of thing. If you can find out more about the specific ad you saw, e.g. what ads were on the page or even the source code of the page where you saw it, we can probably track this one down and ban it too.

    Sincere apologies that keeping the lights on around these parts results in such obvious scam attempts. I am only heartened by the dual thoughts that you’re as likely to see that kind of nonsense on msn.com, and that you, our dear readers, are likely savvy enough to know when you’re being rooked.

  3. says

    @4: Crommunist has a running theme in his writings that “reverse racism” implies there’s a “right” way that racism is SUPPOSED to go. This is a parody of everything surrounding the Macklemore Grammy win and the shitty behaviour afterward.

  4. says

    Crommunist has a running theme in his writings that “reverse racism” implies there’s a “right” way that racism is SUPPOSED to go. This is a parody of everything surrounding the Macklemore Grammy win and the shitty behaviour afterward.

    Yes, I know. My response echoed the opening to “Thrift Shop”.

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