A Man Walks into the Cat Adoption Center

Content notice for mentions of childhood sexual abuse as well as abuser behavior, animal mistreatment, and possible animal abuse. Detailed discussion of it is further warned in the body of this piece.

I don’t really have a Big Political Point to make with this. This is not discourse. This is me writing about something bizarre that happened to me on Saturday.

I do have two minor points: What happens proves that jerks like this do exist outside of the internet and go off at people even when they don’t know whether the people they’re going off at are feminists or SJWs, and that it is very important to pay attention to red flags.

Continue reading “A Man Walks into the Cat Adoption Center”

A Man Walks into the Cat Adoption Center
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Stop Blaming Consent Violations on Social Awkwardness

Content Notice for Consent Violations (including sexual assault and rape)

Consider those who share unsolicited images of their genitalia. Who sexually touch themselves and/or others in public. Who yell inappropriately-explicit comments at passersby. Who make obscene gestures. Who refuse to take “no” — whether stated a tone soft or hard, polite or angry — for an answer. Who violate consent.

They know exactly what they are doing, and they are relying on how people insist that socially-unacceptable behavior only originates with socially-awkward individuals to continue to get away with it. Continue reading “Stop Blaming Consent Violations on Social Awkwardness”

Stop Blaming Consent Violations on Social Awkwardness

That “WHO CARES” Guy: Performative Apathy

For those of us who still do read the comments, despite all the pleas for us to pretend like they don’t exist, it is almost impossible to not notice patterns and trends. Documenting said comment thread tropes is A Thing now (with my favorite examples being at The Toast), so I’m not going to make another bingo board like the kind I whipped up for Miri once.

all too easy

I would, however, like to express my appreciation for my absolute favorite stock commenter: the ever-present “WHO CARES” Guy. Continue reading “That “WHO CARES” Guy: Performative Apathy”

That “WHO CARES” Guy: Performative Apathy

Is Wearing Hijab a Feminist Statement?

This video, via The Guardian’s Comment Is Free and featuring Hanna Yusef, was brought to my attention by Nathan Zwierzynski (transcript):

Speaking as someone who also used to wear hijab and claim it was a bold feminist act, I will say that there is a lot to unpack here, none of which can be addressed without nuance and care.
Continue reading “Is Wearing Hijab a Feminist Statement?”

Is Wearing Hijab a Feminist Statement?

Against Making “Unwed Teen Dads” a Thing

Please note that I’ve attempted to stay away from cissexist language as much as possible in this post, but all my sources assume the terms “mother” and “father” refer to “person who gave birth” and “person who inseminated”, respectively. Also, this is very America-centric, because we’re #1 among developed nations as far as teen pregnancy rates go and that’s my context.

Sometimes, ideas that sound fabulous when circulating as Tumblr screenshots are not as great after taking into consideration certain points (image transcript of the text after the jump).

Thanks to Danny Strawn for finding this for me.
Thanks to Danny Strawn for finding this for me.

The opposition to misogyny in the form of slut-shaming is commendable. The call-out of the rank hypocrisy in attitudes towards sex and reproduction is excellent. Overall, it’s a thought-provoking post and makes an excellent rhetorical point.

Taken beyond a rhetorical point, however? The notion that we should make “teen dads” happen calls attention to exactly the wrong parts of the issue with teen pregnancy in the United States.

Continue reading “Against Making “Unwed Teen Dads” a Thing”

Against Making “Unwed Teen Dads” a Thing

Cookies As Rebellion: On the Value of Differing Perspectives

Recently, I completed my listen of the audiobook for Atul Gawande’s Being Mortal. Gawande’s work has been on my list for years. Thanks to my 2016 reading challenge of reading exclusively non-white* authors, I finally made my way to him.

The book is a moving and important read, making a compelling argument for bringing humanity back to the process of dying. As a former believer, grappling with my mortality is something I’ve done deliberately and conscientiously. As someone who would be paralyzed were it not for modern surgical techniques, I am eager to balance my enthusiasm for scientific advances with a reality check about the inherent ultimate frailty of the human body. As the current caretaker to a disabled spouse, the more dire side of the modern, medicalized system of illness and death is never far from my mind.

That Gawande is Indian shouldn’t matter in a book about the American medical system, right? Any good doctor with writing chops could have produced as excellent a work as Being Mortal, theoretically speaking. Yet it is not so. Continue reading “Cookies As Rebellion: On the Value of Differing Perspectives”

Cookies As Rebellion: On the Value of Differing Perspectives

Preventing Abortions with Planned Parenthood

Years ago, at an atheist meeting, a Christian showed up, as was wont to happen every few months or so. I decided that I would take one for the team and fully engage him so that others could have the more nuanced conversations that drew most people to the meetings. Lucky for me (but not for him), his prepared topic of conversation for the time he had chosen to break bread with us baby-eaters was abortion.

He led not with a question, but with an assumption that we atheists tended to support reproductive rights. He wasn’t wrong (though of course there are some over-represented exceptions among atheists). I decided to ask him a question: “How many abortions have you prevented?”

My inquiry may have dumbfounded him for a while, but I was hardly exaggerating or lying. At the time, I was an unofficial guerrilla unwanted-pregnancy-preventer thanks to Planned Parenthood. Continue reading “Preventing Abortions with Planned Parenthood”

Preventing Abortions with Planned Parenthood

Trigger Warnings: An Plea for Freedom of Speech

There is a trend afoot that threatens the free discourse that is integral to honest and truthful exchanges of ideas both online and off. From columnists at The Wall Street Journal to self-described liberal professors writing anonymously on Vox to reposts of well-known atheosphere luminaries on The New Republic to writers on feminism at the New York Times to fiction writers who speak against it yet use it to publicize their work, there is a growing swell of voices speaking up and out regarding freedom of speech. These voices clamor against trigger warnings, which they point out protect students from things that they have personally found to help them grow as people. They worry that students will never learn about anything unpleasant (or anything at all) if they are warned about it beforehand.

It seems that their problem is that they think that a warning is a firm deterrent, if not a total block, against anyone reading anything ever, rather than a method by which to include even more readers. Such confusion is understandable; once upon a time, I briefly shared in it. As a much more experienced writer than I was back then, however, I now personally refuse to submit to their assaults on free speech that rely so heavily on their confusion as a cudgel. However much they insist that their outrage should affect me, I will continue to add content notices to my writings as is my right under the First Amendment. Continue reading “Trigger Warnings: An Plea for Freedom of Speech”

Trigger Warnings: An Plea for Freedom of Speech

#DontAskAlice for Help with Sexual Harassment

In case you missed it: Science Careers, from the journal Science, decided to publish some advice from Dr. Alice S. Huang, former president of AAAS (the American Association for the Advancement of Science, whose tagline is “Advancing Science, Serving Society”) and someone who, according to her bio, advocates for women in science. The piece, titled Help! My adviser won’t stop looking down my shirt!, was swiftly taken down but lives on in Interneternity thanks to PDF screengrabs and the Wayback Machine.

The tl;dr of the piece? “Suck it up, Buttercup.” The rest of it is some rather disturbing and gender-essentialist apologia for the sexual harassment of women in STEM. Continue reading “#DontAskAlice for Help with Sexual Harassment”

#DontAskAlice for Help with Sexual Harassment