Category Archive: Feels

Jun 23 2014

Home is Where The Redirect Link Leads

Hello, wonderful commenters, readers, and other-people-peering-at-this. I’m writing with bittersweet news: G&H is moving, this time to a standalone location. I have adored being here. I have gotten to write next to some of my favorite people in the world, and it has been and important and warm and loving community. There aren’t grand reasons …

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May 23 2014

Annotated Psych Links

…exactly what it sounds like. Every once in a while I start to think we’re getting somewhere concrete on this whole braining thing, and then I’m reminded that our method looks a lot like “poke it with a stick and see what happens.” Or, you know, “poke it with a deep brain stimulator and see …

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May 17 2014

128 Days

Sometimes I remember that I counted down 128 days until I moved to Chicago. That day 96 was so bad I remember thinking 96, 96, 96. 95 and a half. That I showed up with almost no social skills, no idea how to hold a conversation, no idea how to make friends, and I learned …

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May 14 2014

Falling In Love With People

[One of my most popular posts from early in the creation of this blog.] I think one of my favorite things about people is how they light up when you find exactly the right thing that they love to talk about. Sometimes it’s people–the friends who accomplished something, the family that’s visiting in a few …

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Apr 28 2014

The Cockroach of Motivation

[Draft-clearing again. Quite old, somewhat updated for clarity.] Today, as I have several times this year, I told someone that I had gone on a date with that I would prefer not to see them again. Then I gave a presentation I thought could have gone better and proceeded to be horribly unproductive all day. …

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Mar 27 2014

Counterintuitive Underreactions and Overreactions

The quality of not reacting in an upset way to new information has been on my mind recently. People seem to tell me things regularly—a driving force, if not the initial impetus behind my career choice–and something I’ve noticed as a skill is knowing when to react strongly to emotionally-loaded information…and when to treat an offhand …

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Feb 18 2014

Eating Disorders: The Stories We Tell

[This is a repost of a piece I wrote a year ago on Teen Skepchick. I've started therapy specifically focusing on disordered eating, with a goal of leaving college in a Mostly Functional state, and was reflecting on past experiences. I still live by the ballet studio, and I've stopped in once, to pick up …

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Jan 17 2014

A Week

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[The eating disorder content note on this post is so loud it tapdances in sequined tights. Skip the latter half if that seems bad for you.] It’s a Friday. 12:42 in the morning. And I’ve done something for the first time in seven years. I have fed myself properly for a week. Twenty-one meals in …

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Oct 09 2013

Two Shoes


[Adapted from a really old piece from my formerly-pseudonymous blog] This is half of the last pair shoes I danced in, and half of the shoes I stopped thinking of myself as a dancer in. On the left, Grishko 2007′s in a medium shank, size 6, 5X wide. On the right, Sansha Recitals, size 10, …

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Oct 06 2013


This is the story of a girl who doubted herself. Who didn’t trust him at age six. Who compared him to a rattlesnake once. Who can still pull up the memory of that shocked face–the way she turned around in the car, while driving no less, and the look of horror when that eight year …

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