Since I moved to the Freethought Blogs network, I have a bunch of new readers who aren’t familiar with my greatest hits from my old, pre-FTB blog. So I’m linking to some of them, about one a day, to introduce them to the new folks.
Today’s archive treasure: A Skeptic’s View of Love. The tl;dr: A skeptical/ materialist view of love — not seeing it as destined by God or as a union of perfectly matched souls, but as a human emotion and connection and series of choices between flawed people — is not only more accurate, but more sustainable… and more richly satisfying.
A nifty pull quote:
First, obviously, I think the whole “soul-mate/ romantic destiny” thing is just wrong. Mistaken. Not true. I don’t think we have souls, much less mates for them; I don’t think there’s an invisible hand pushing people together (and if there were, it’d have a seriously sadistic sense of humor, what with putting people’s true destined loves on opposite sides of the country and whatnot).
But maybe more to the point:
The “soul-mate/ romantic destiny” vision of love puts the focus on love as something you feel — rather than something you do.
It puts the focus on love as something that happens to you — rather than something that you choose.
And I find it much more romantic, and much more loving, to see love as something we do, and something we choose.