Category Archive: shysters

Jul 11 2009

Quick! We Need More Pirates!

Isn’t it obvious? Correlation between pirate populations and global warming. Image credit: Church Of The Flying Spaghetti Monster/Wikimedia That’s one of the best illustrations of correlation does not imply causation I’ve ever seen. It’s even better than Stephen J. Gould’s .400 batting average discussion in Full House, mostly because while I get pirates, I’ll never …

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Jun 26 2009

Food Safety Fail

Ladies and gentlemen, I present Exhibit A in the case for stricter food safety regulations and oversight: Question: Do the folks who own Orca Distribution West, Inc. and Setton Pistachios – do they let their own children eat the shit they sell? The U.S. Food and Drug Administration is warning people not to eat California …

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May 19 2009

The Sincerest Form of Flattery

Sometimes, little events have unexpected consequences. MoDo plagiarizes TPM blogger extraordinaire Josh Marshall, which leads to a lame-ass excuse from her, which leads Digby down memory lane (who was it who accused Joe Biden of plagiarism, eh?). Glenn Greenwald asks, “Who’s the parasite now, bitches?” and TPM blogger Boyd Reed muses, “Hmm, wonder if I’ve …

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May 11 2009

The Amazing Adventures of the Abstinence Fairy

Bristol Palin’s decided to crusade for abstinence. The opportunities for mockery are endless: Bristol Palin has successfully shed her image as a jilted unwed mother. Through the magical gullibility of Republican voters and the mainstream medias’ ability to completely suspend their viewers’ disbelief, Bristol Palin has been miraculously transformed into… the Abstinence Fairy! Faster than …

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May 09 2009

Arlen Specter’s Charitible Efforts: Doin It Rong

Shameless. Absolutely fucking shameless: Sen. Arlen Specter (D-PA)–two time survivor of Hodgkins disease–is no stranger to cancer, cancer awareness, and cancer research funding. But he’s using his hard earned credibility as a national spokesperson on the issue to fight the disease in a roundabout way. He’s touting–and raising money from–a website called specterforthecure.com, which he …

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May 02 2009

Places Not to Get Auto Loans

No. 1: The Auto Financing Network. Unless, of course, you like to be stalked if you fall behind on a car payment: But the tale of Phoenix’s Jennifer Dicks and her delinquent Chevy Cavalier is so beyond we fully expect Lifetime to option the story for a film. Last year Dicks (allegedly) bought a Chevy …

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Apr 23 2009

Is There a Fake Doctor in the House?

Most of you have probably already seen PZ’s post ripping “Dr.” Don Patterson’s testimony before the Texas State Board of Education. You probably laughed merrily at the man’s utter ignorance about evolution. Just another liar for Jesus, right? Well, yes, but some people get inordinately impressed by a doctor’s testimony. I’m sure there’s plenty of …

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Nov 07 2008

Election Fraud, Anyone?

The next time the Cons bring their myth of massive voter fraud, we may just want to remind them of who the real frauds are: On Election Day, the Minnesota Independent reported that a handful of voters of Somali origin at the Brian Coyle Center in Minneapolis said that “a translator working there was instructing …

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Aug 25 2008

Being a Former POW is No Excuse

For years, I begged my father to watch Full Metal Jacket with me. He claimed it was the only Vietnam movie that ever got it right. Anyone who wanted to know about Vietnam was told to see the film, and they’d know exactly how it was. But he refused to watch it with me, and …

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Jul 19 2008

Why Christian Businesses Should Advertise As Such

Ron at Bay of Fundie narrowly missed getting fleeced by a Christian business. Fortunately, they gave the game away by attempting to proselytize. While searching for a replacement hard drive for his iPod, he discovered a page on one seller’s site that announced its mission to bring people to Jesus. That told Ron to look …

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