Intolerancia

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

We haven’t done Intolerancia in a while, have we? It’s time to bring it back, because the chorus of whines from right-wing religious morons is swelling to a crescendo, and it’s time to raise a counterpoint.

I’ve also come up with a new motto, which I’m probably going to have to get on a t-shirt someday: “I’ve lost my tolerance for your intolerance.” It’s the refrain that’s been going through my head tonight, along with a leitmotif of disgust.

We begin our recital with a rococo duet on the theme of “they did so why can’t he?” Gemito espressivo, per favore:

President-elect Barack Obama has yet to attend church services since winning the White House earlier this month, a departure from the example of his two immediate predecessors.

On the three Sundays since his election, Obama has instead used his free time to get in workouts at a Chicago gym.

[snip]

Both President-elect George W. Bush and President-elect Bill Clinton managed to attend church in the weeks after they were elected.

It goes on. And on. And on and on and on. The authors just can’t seem to get over the fact that our last two presidents went to church a lot, while this one, having had his pastor go down in flames last February, would prefer not to drag the media circus into some unsuspecting service. Mr. Martin, Ms. Lee, allow me to just say a little something here: There is no fucking religious test for office in this country. Get the fuck over it.

This is also my advice to Charles Lynch, who now joins the chorus with a tired little ostinato:

A 70-year-old resident spent Monday night in the Marion County Jail after praying aloud during a moment of silence at the City Council meeting.

Charles Lynch was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct after causing a disturbance during the meeting, according to a police report from the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department.

At the onset of the meeting, Mayor Rob Thoman read a statement of disorderly conduct and stated anyone who talked out of turn would be in violation of the statement.

During the moment of silence, Lynch began reading a prayer out loud; when asked to be quiet, Lynch began to pray louder, according to the report.

Lynch was then asked to leave the meeting. He refused and grabbed a chair, prompting Southport assistant Chief Mark Myers to forcibly pry Lynch’s hands from the chair, according to the report.

[snip]

“I’m not promoting any church or any religion,” Lynch said. “All I want is the way it was. Why take away our rights as citizens to have a word of prayer, because we’ve always had it.”

Guess what, Chuck? Absolutely no one was taking away your right as a citizen to have a word of prayer. In fact, they bunged a moment of silence in there at the beginning so you could pray. All they wanted you to do, in fact, was keep that prayer between yourself and your God so that other people’s right to have a word of prayer with their God wasn’t drowned by your obbligato.

Ed Brayton had a good point on this: for people like this, it isn’t about the right to pray, but the desire to force others to pray the same way they do.

Chuck got us warmed up with the “they’re taking away our rights!” refrain. Are you ready for the persecution rondo?

Kalamazoo to Persecute Christians

The city of Kalamazoo is discussing an ordinance to discriminate against Christians. Of course, that’s not how they put it.

Proposed Kalamazoo ordinance would ban discrimination against lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgendered individuals

KALAMAZOO — A proposed Kalamazoo city ordinance aimed at protecting lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered individuals from discrimination will be introduced Monday before the City Commission.

[snip]

So Christian bookstores would be forced to hire crossdressers. This proposal would take away everyone’s right to hire or not hire whomever they please. This is a violation of the freedom of association.

That’s the persecution. Somehow, the fact that the ordinance has about 67,982 exemptions written in for religious entities that want to retain the right to discriminate at will and call it “religion” escapes this fucktard. He dismisses it with a breathless, “How long will churches and private citizens be exempt if this proposal is passed?”

Like, ZOMG. Someone may have to allow some dude in a dress into church. How very terrifying. Why, it’s almost as bad as getting torn limb-from-limb by wild beasts, or burned alive, or murdered en masse by the established Church’s soldiers.

At least the overwhelming majority of his commenters ripped him a new one. Several new ones, in fact. Not that it will matter, because Christians who believe that anti-discrimination laws passed by Christian officials and supported by Christian citizens discriminate against Christians aren’t going to be swayed by a lil ol’ thing like reality.

Refrain: “I’ve lost my tolerance for your intolerance.”

Maybe the more compassionate Christians could get busy teaching their brethern how to sing a new song.

(Tip o’ the shot glass to Attaturk and Ed Brayton. For those who’d like to know what the hell all those classical music terms meant, see here. The one thing you won’t find is gemito. It’s Italian for “whine.”)

Intolerancia

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

Would monsieur and madame like a little religion with their pollyticks? Tres bien! The chef has some delightful trifles especially for you.

You remember South Carolina’s obnoxious “I Believe” license plates? Americans United for Separation of Church and State surely does. And they’re bringing suit on some excellent grounds:


According to the suit, the AUSCS contends license plate specialization is more restricted in other instances, and that the legislator circumvented the usual practices for the approval of license plates. By law, organizational plates can only display a name of a sponsoring organization and its logo. Personalized vanity plates can only contain seven characters, with no symbols or emblems permitted. The legislature, rather than private entities, introduced and passed the measure for the ‘I Believe’ plates.


It’s bad enough that the legislature pushed this through, but it gets worse. How deeply has South Carolina’s government been dabbling its fingers into the whole promoting Christian plates effort? Very deeply indeed:


Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer said he would spend $4,000 of his own money to meet the state’s requirement of at least 400 prepaid orders for a plate or a $4,000 up-front payment in order to create such a plate. Bauer said he expected to be reimbursed by the state for his expenditure to ensure the plate’s passage.


Something extremely wrong with that, methinks. It’s one thing to want to spend $4,000 of your very own dollars to promote a religious plate. It’s quite another to expect the good state of South Carolina to reimburse you for it.

And that’s only the beginning of the lunacy:


[Rep. Bill] Sandifer said that while the legislature was simply granting the opportunity for South Carolinians to demonstrate their faith, that did not mean he would afford practitioners of other religions the same opportunity. When asked whether or not he would support a legislative action sponsoring another religion like Islam on specialty plates, he responded directly.

“Absolutely and positively no,” Sandifer said.


I believe that’s what we like to call an Establishment Clause violation, ladies and gentlemen. I trust the court will rule accordingly. If not, I’ll know we’ve officially become a theocracy.

Over at Submitted to a Candid World, Ames has a brilliant piece pointing out an intolerable double-standard:


Even our rhetoric is still geared towards the acceptance of fundamentalist and militant non-Islamic religion. Take, for example, Campus Crusade for Christ. No, please, take it. Not even the temporal
distance we have from the malignant and bellicose origins of the word “crusade” can excuse its use by an evangelizing organization to define its plans for the nonbelievers – “turning lost students into Christ-centered laborers,” indeed. That “Cru” is “appropriating,” “subverting,” “redeeming,” or “detoxifying” the word is no defense to the tactlessness of its use. We ought to be as offended by the implication of a “Crusade for Christ” as we would be by a “Campus Jihad for Allah.”


Ames, darling, you’re too right. Christianity, for all its love of screaming “Persecution!” at the least little criticism, gets far too many passes on this kind of crap. Time for the double-standard to go the way of the coconut-munching T-Rex.

We’ve got our work cut out for us if the clueless Christian in his comments section is any indication. Amazing how blind rabid Christians are, innit? That’s how good but unthinking people end up getting led ’round by the nose by the likes of Monkey Boy George.

I’m happy to report that none of my Christian friends are so blind. Then again, some of them are the kind of people who would encourage a “Campus Jihad for Allah” group just so they could sit back and watch the fun. All in the spirit of equal treatment and toleration, of course! ;-)

We come now to possibly the funniest post written about the Great Cracker Controversy of 2008. Atheist Chaplain had me doubled over many, many times. I’ll leave it to you to discover the joys of PZ as a man holding a magnifying glass over an anthill, and the sneaky ways one can get consecrated Host unstuck from the roof of your mouth. You’ll also get the most eye-opening description of what the wine-transmuted-to-Blood-of-Christ should actually taste like. Those gems should be left to you, dear readers, to discover. I’ll just share this last bit, which is the best idea in the universe for what PZ should do with a purloined cracker:


I humbly suggest that he do something with it that the Catholics would absolutely wet their pants over, auction it off to the highest bidder and donate the proceedings to the No To Pope Coalition or maybe one of the many organisations around the world that is fighting for justice from the Catholic church over its deliberate and organised denial of justice against its sexually promiscuous priests and pedophiles. You could see the Catholics reaching for their cheque books now, hoping to bring the cracker back home, but the pain of signing on the dotted line, knowing that the money would be funding one of their many detractors would bring Schadenfreude to those who have long suffered at the hands and other bodily organs of the Catholic priesthood.


This would be a phenominal solution, don’t you think? PZ gets to make his point, the hostage Host is returned safely, and the fuckwits who ruin it for the sane Catholics get to support a good cause against their will. Perfecto!

Intolerancia

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

You know, I used to not mind the phrase “In God We Trust” on coinage – seemed ridiculous but harmless, and if it made the “Jesus Wuuuvs Me!” crowd feel all warm and fuzzy, fine. Let them have their jollies. That live-and-let-live attitude died with the rise of the frothing fundies. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about the Jeebus freaks, it’s that if you give them a millimeter, they’ll take a megaparsec. The outcry over moving their ridiculous, unrepresentative phrase to the edge of the coins rather than the face was nauseating enough, but this means war:


Religious Right leaders and their followers often assert that it’s no big deal when the government endorses religion in a general way. “In God We Trust” appears on our money, and “under God” was slipped into the Pledge of Allegiance. It’s a generic endorsement of religion, so no harm done, right?

Recent events in California indicate that it’s not that simple. Bakersfield City Councilwoman Jacquie Sullivan has started a national campaign to persuade local governments and public schools to post “In God We Trust” signs in a conspicuous place. The drive has sparked a surprising amount of discord.

In Lancaster, Calif., a woman who protested the council’s unanimous vote to post an “In God We Trust” sign had her house vandalized. Debbie Phillips had publicly opposed the move at two open meetings. She woke up May 29 to find the words “In God We Trust or?” scrawled in shoe polish in foot-high letters across two windows and a sliding-glass door.


Or what, you addlepated fuckwits? “In God We Trust or” you’ll start a holy war? Maybe revive the good old days of wholesale slaughter for Jesus? Burn heretics at the stake? You yearn for those days, don’t you? I think a lot of the theocon outcry over Islamofacism is just envy. They wish they could get away with beheadings, stonings, and murder in the name of God. Instead, they’re reduced to whining about persecution because their shout-outs to God are merely deafening rather than eardrum-bursting in this country, and instead of the sword, they have to whip out the shoe polish.

And don’t you even fucking begin whining about how that’s just an isolated incidence and not at all representative of all religious frothers. You clueless fuckers may be wielding petitions rather than shoe polish, but it’s all the same sick fucking mentality. You’re so God-blind that you make dumbshit statements such as this:


Sullivan told the San Francisco Chronicle back in 2002 that she can’t understand why some people get upset over her crusade.

“To me, ‘In God We Trust’ is our official national motto, and God is all-inclusive of everyone,” she said.


And can’t possibly comprehend viewpoints such as this:


This narrow perspective is all too common among the Religious Right. A moment’s thought should demonstrate that generic endorsements of God do not include Americans who believe in many gods, don’t believe in God at all or define God in a non-traditional way. They are also offensive to some believers who don’t like to see these pathetic attempts to secularize God.


That narrow perspective is fucking dangerous. It’s a short step from believing God is all-inclusive of everyone to imposing that idea by legislative fiat and violence. I’ll be more than happy to provide overwhelming historical evidence for that claim, should you be stupid enough to debate it, you rabid little assclowns.

Something tells me we should have taken their cutesy little slogans away a long fucking time ago. “In God We Trust” is a relatively recent phenominon, but to hear McLame tell it, it’s been on our money since the United States began:

Note to McCain: Not fucking true. None of it. America is not a Christian nation, God doesn’t belong in American government, and those stupid “Hey, God, look at us – we’re praising you by government decree!” phrases weren’t current in this country until the Cold War. Bitch.

We never should have let you fuckers get away with this shit, because now you’ve got a sense of entitlement that threatens to suffocate the world. Not to mention, it doesn’t matter how much we secular sorts allow you religious frothers to get away with, you’re always going to whine and lie and bitch about how fucking persecuted you are:


Tim Todd explains why private donations for military Bibles are so desperately needed: “Our government no longer provides Bibles for our troops! Because of the foolish ‘separation of church and state’ battle going on in this country, our military stopped this years ago.”

This is an outright lie, as evidenced by many recent Department of Defense contracts for the purchase of Bibles. Topping the list of Bible contractors are the International Bible Society, with over $450,000 in DoD contracts for Bibles between 2002 and 2007, and Tammy’s Bible and Book Store, with close to $300,000 during this same period. Countless smaller contracts, ranging from a few thousand to tens of thousands of dollars, have been awarded to various Christian book dealers and distributors for Bibles and other Christian books.

Todd continues: “However, the U.S. military does give a copy of the Koran to all of our soldiers so they can ‘know their enemy.’ I say we need to give our soldiers a copy of the Bible so they can ‘know their savior!!!'”

Here, too, a simple search of DoD contracts is all that’s needed to dispute Tim Todd’s claim. If Korans were being given to all of our troops, as Todd would have his readers believe, there would be some record of their purchase, but there isn’t. There hasn’t been a single DoD contract for the purchase of Korans during the so-called war on terror. The only government agency to buy the Koran in bulk has been the Justice Department, for the use of the F.B.I.


What the fuck are my tax dollars doing being used to purchase a surplus of Bibles for soldiers? If you’re going to be claiming the troops are Bible-deprived and solicit donations for another metric ton of Bibles for each and every soldier, well fine, fuck it: I want my tax dollars back, and you fucktards can go buy your own damned Bibles for the military. It’s not like this appears to be a problem anyway:


If the numbers of Bibles claimed to have been shipped to Iraq by all of the organiza
tions sending them were added up, there have actually been more Bibles shipped than troops deployed. And, in addition to the large number of Bibles purchased by the DoD and those sent to Iraq by private organizations, Bibles are freely distributed to untold thousands of basic trainees by ministries such as Campus Crusade for Christ before they’re deployed. In fact, so many groups have been distributing Bibles to our soldiers that Eric Horner Ministries, which hands out camouflage covered New Testaments from the International Bible Society, reported in March 2007: “We recently visited Ft Jackson SC for a concert and gave out around 250 copies of the New Testament with Psalms and Proverbs to our young soldiers. We had hoped to give out more but we learned there had just been a group on base handing them out as well.”


And you somehow think that the troops are Bible deprived? Religion really has rotted your brains, hasn’t it? It’s totally destroyed your ability to recognize even the vaguest outline of reality.

I’m through with even the most innocuous government support of religion, you silly shitheads. You had your chance to get a little bit of God into public life and be satisfied. You won’t be happy until we’re living in a theocracy. Fine. I withdraw my equanimity, and from henceforth, shall happily demand that government be scrubbed absolutely clean of the lest little hint of God. Even the slightest speck of religion is too much. See my above comment about millimeters and megaparsecs if you want to know why I won’t tolerate even a whiff of you anymore.

And you fuckers can damned well pay taxes, too.

Intolerancia

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

I don’t know if it’s because it’s just after the new moon, because we’re having a carnival, or because God told ‘em to, but the religious freaks seem to have been out in abundance, making atheists apoplectic and annoying the bugshit out of moderate Christians everywhere. I’m busier than a cat herder at a dog show trying to round ‘em all up.

We’ll begin with boycotts. Those are always fun, this one especially so:


Lately, I’ve seen some changes at the two Starbucks that live less than a block away from the Mother Jones office. Last month, they both started pushing a new blend called “Pike Place Roast” as their regular drip coffee, as part of a campaign to compete with brisk coffee sales at Dunkin’ Donuts and McDonald’s. As part of the campaign, Starbucks re-introduced its 1971 brown-and-white logo featuring a two-tailed mermaid. Okay, technically it’s a siren, but regardless, the image of a female figure brazenly spreading its tails has made a few Christians vow to boycott the company.

“The Starbucks logo has a naked woman on it with her legs spread like a prostitute,” explains alarmist Mark Dice, of a Christian group called The Resistance. “Need I say more? It’s extremely poor taste, and the company might as well call themselves Slutbucks.”

While I’m curious what the value of a Slutbuck is relative to a Schrutebuck, I’m worried that Dice doesn’t seem to understand the Starbucks siren is half-fish. She doesn’t have legs to spread, much less a vagina to go between them. The fact that Dice doesn’t get the difference between a fin and a foot may be an example of what abstinence-only funding does to education, but it’s certainly not the first time spunky Christians have boycotted the multinational company.


No, it’s not. After all, Starbucks supports teh gays, and – according to Worldnutdaily – markets “anti-God coffee cups.” Shockingly, in a rare display of temporary near-sanity, the WND article notes that the “anti-God” messages were submitted by Starbucks customers, and the line of coffee cup quotes also included blatant pro-God messages. That hasn’t stopped the foaming-at-the-mouth Jeebus freaks from deciding to boycott a company they don’t buy coffee from anyway.

I’m sure the pain will be profound. I’ll have to start buying Starbucks again to counterbalance the drastic loss to their profit margin. After all, in this shaky economy, losing that lone rabid Christian customer could spell the end.

Meanwhile, Arizona’s keeping up the fine tradition of dishing up some right-wing conservative crazy in my absence:


Federal tax law, as it relates to tax-exempt religious ministries, is pretty clear — houses of worship may not legally intervene in political campaigns, either in support of or opposition to a candidate or a party. Those who violate the law run the risk of losing their tax-exempt status. With some regularity, the IRS reminds houses of worship about this, warning them about the dangers of ignoring the law.

A far-right group in Arizona, however, has an idea: conservative churches should ignore the law — and in the process, test the law — on purpose.

[snip]

In other words, the Alliance Defense Fund wants these churches to commit an act of civil disobedience. According to the WSJ report, ADF hoped to find as many as 50 ministries to take part in the project, and the group has heard from about 80 ministers who expressed interest in
participating.

Those ministers need to think long and hard about this, because they’re playing with fire here. Worse, this is one of those huge-risk, low-reward situations.


Aren’t they precious? I’d be more than happy to see them fuck up their tax-exempt status, so they have my wholehearted atheist blessing in this. By all means, go forth, preach politics, and get your perks yanked by Uncle Sam. You can pay up with the rest of us, you annoying little prayer-pushers.

The beauty of this is, only the churches stupid enough to participate will suffer. The churches that are wise enough to keep their noses clean of political preaching will survive with their exempt status perfectly intact. That’s survival of the fittest, that is.

Continuing with our parade of the pathetic, even students are getting into the spirit of intolerance:


Some Plano students who are Jewish say they were pressured or taunted to pick up copies of the New Testament from school display tables during recent weeks.

Their parents have called for changes in district policies that allow outside groups to distribute materials on campus.

“Probably the one I heard the most was, ‘If the Bible touched you, like, will you burn or something?’ ” said Jeffrey Lavine, 16, a sophomore at Vines High School. “I sort of played it down as a joke and everything, which it was, but it was definitely a meaner comment than what we’re used to.”


Do I have to tell you how sad it is that a Jewish student is “used to” comments that are less mean but no less ignorant? And so the grand tradition of Jew-hating Christianity goes on.

It’s not limited to Texas, either. Ohio’s having it’s own fun:


Many Mount Vernon Middle School students have been vocal in their support of science teacher John Freshwater in his claims to a First Amendment right to display a Bible on his desk. But are those students willing to grant someone else equal rights to remain neutral or to disagree?

Several comments from students and parents indicate that acceptance and religious tolerance is a one-way street for many concerned.


You mean you cottoned on? When a fundamentalist Christian bleats about religious tolerance, you can take it for granted they don’t mean any religion other than theirs. You can tell from the way their kids behave that they have no fucking clue what the First Amendment really means:


“You’re eit
her for Mr. Freshwater or you’re against Mr. Freshwater. There’s no in between,” Murdoch said. “In the kids’ minds, I think, it is just the Bible issue. And who is going to go against the Bible? Nobody. But it seems like the ‘Christians’ are using that as an excuse to gang up on the ‘atheists.’

“My daughter Arie told me about a Jewish child who brought his Torah to school when other students brought Bibles in support of Freshwater,” she continued. “He thought he was supporting freedom of religious expression, and the other kids just ripped him apart. ‘What are you doing?’ they asked. ‘You can’t support Mr. Freshwater, you’re Jewish.’ So they don’t get it.”

No, they really don’t. And their parents don’t want them to. There’s no room in their world view for anyone who steps outside their narrowly-drawn lines of religious belief, not even their fellow Christians:


Murdoch said one of Arie’s friends wore a T-shirt to school that read, “I don’t need to wear a special T-shirt to be a Christian.” That individual was reportedly pushed into the lockers and called a “stupid atheist b****.”

This shows not only a dramatic lack of tolerance, but the typical lack of reading comprehension displayed by most fundies. I think we’re looking at the future fellows of the DIsco Institute, here.

Beth Murdoch certainly isn’t one of them. She’s breathing fire and brimstone all over the intolerant assclowns masquerading as Christians. She appears to have a perfect grasp of what it really means to be Christian, and she seems just a wee bit outraged that the zealots have twisted the message beyond all recognition.

I have to say, that’s the best thing about all these flare-ups: the moderate Christians suddenly come out swinging, and it’s a beautiful thing to watch. If they can drown out the fundies, we might have a chance at peaceful coexistence here.

That’s going to be damned difficult if some moderates don’t get control of the airwaves soon. PZ Myers recently liveblogged an evangelical radio show on KKMS. Their topic was Refuting the Arguments of Atheists:


The host claims that it is important to understand the perspective of the “New” Atheists…so why are they inviting this Aikman clown on, instead of an actual atheist?

Aikman claims the atheists are bringing “pestilence”, and claims that we only pick on Christians (what? What about Hitchens?) because Christians are so good and kind and generous and won’t blow them up. We’re already in stupid territory: the atheists criticize Christians because they are the dominant element in our culture.

We get some whining about how Christianity is portrayed in the media (ubiquitously?), and an uncontested claim that the religion is a benefit to society.


You have to go read about how they failed to refute the atheists who actually called in. They’re fine with the uncontested claims, but the second you contest them, they freeze. It’s adorable.

All right, my darlings. That’s about all the religious malarkey I can handle in one night. I’m going to go plunge myself into a nice, warm bath of godlessness, accompanied by a nice glass of Pinot Immorality Noir.

Tip o’ the glass of the wine of the passion of her immorality to Ed at Dispatches, Steve at Carpetbagger, and PZ at Pharyngula for pointing the way to today’s Intolerancia. Anyone else care to join me in a toast?

Intolerancia

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

I never cease to be astonished at the fuckwittery extremely religious folks display, but there are times when it’s so overwhelming that it literally takes my breath away. This was one of those times:


Land ‘O Lakes, Florida — The stories in the news about inappropriate relationships between teachers and students have been overwhelming. There was even a substitute teacher in New Port Richey who got in trouble after investigators say she had a relationship with an underage
student.

Well, another Pasco County substitute teacher’s job is on the line, but this time it’s because of a magic trick.

The charge from the school district — Wizardry!

My darlings, I doubled over. I could not have lost my breath faster if Mohammed Ali had planted a firm one right in my diaphram. What the fuck is wrong with these people?

Did the substitute try to steal penises? No. Was he chanting rituals? No. Was he wearing a pointy hat and a robe with stars on it? No.

He did a fucking magic trick.


Substitute teacher Jim Piculas does a 30-second magic trick where a toothpick disappears then reappears.

But after performing it in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land ‘O Lakes, Piculas said his job did a disappearing act of its own.

“I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, ‘Jim, we have a huge issue, you can’t take any more assignments you need to come in right away,'” he said.

When Piculas went in, he learned his little magic trick cast a spell and went much farther than he’d hoped.

“I said, ‘Well Pat, can you explain this to me?’ ‘You’ve been accused of wizardry,’ [he said]. Wizardry?” he asked.

Oh, yeah. Sheer fucking wizardry, that, because nobody can possibly make a toothpick disappear without mystic fucking powers.

WikiHow says that trick will fool just about anybody. Well, it sure doesn’t take much to fool the godfearing adults of Florida. PZ’s probably right – Florida’s a hoax.

Amazing.

And I hadn’t yet recovered from that when I got blindsided by this sledgehammer of stupid:


This bit of wackiness which comes from a site called California Catholic Daily (which is odd since most Catholics don’t have a problem with evolution):



Now that Darwinists rule academia, they will brook no contradiction, and they will happily commit employment
assassination even against tenured professors who dare even
to mention intelligent design. The Darwinists even have their own Gestapo in the National Center for Science Education led by a modern day Heinrich Himmler named Eugenie Scott.


The NCSE is like the Gestapo and Genie Scott is comparable to Himmler, really?


No.

Fucking.

Way.

This evolution = Hitler thing is getting outrageously out of hand. It’s gone from ridiculous to pathological. These people need to be dragged to the Holocaust Memorial, where some folks from the Anti-Defamation League can explain kindly but firmly the differences between Eugenie Scott and Himmler, why IDiots are not suffering the same persecution suffered by the Jewish people under the Third Reich, and why equating evolution to the Holocaust is an indecent, disgusting, and fuckheaded thing to do.

The reason the Anti-Defamation League needs to do this is simple. If the task falls to me, I’m going to be way too fucking tempted to do something as extreme as their hyperbole.

All right, maybe they haven’t pushed me quite that far yet, but I’d definitely give them a right ding ’round the earhole. It’s very, very difficult to hold a civil debate with people this batshit insane. I’m afraid my patience is too frayed to even try.

Let’s just have a bit o’ wizardry instead, eh?

Intolerancia

En Tequila Es Verdad is proud to present a brand-spanking-new feature: Intolerancia. And when I say spanking, I mean spanking: this is where we’ll take a whirlwind tour through the world of intolerant religious fuckwits and lay the smackdown upon them. They claim they are holy. We shall leave them holey. Ah-ha-ha.

Ahem. So:

Today’s smiting of intolerant bastards.

For those of you still convinced that extreme evangelicals don’t pose a threat to your own self, think again:


FORT RILEY, Kan. — When Specialist Jeremy Hall held a meeting last July for atheists and freethinkers at Camp Speicher in Iraq, he was excited, he said, to see an officer attending.

But minutes into the talk, the officer, Maj. Freddy J. Welborn, began to berate Specialist Hall and another soldier about atheism, Specialist Hall wrote in a sworn statement. “People like you are not holding up the Constitution and are going against what the founding fathers, who were Christians, wanted for America!” Major Welborn said, according to the statement.

What’s this to do with you? You’re not in the military, so it doesn’t matter, right? Wrongo. Let me just put it this way: how happy are you about the idea that a bunch of frothing lunatics have access to the heavy weaponry?

I think we all know what happens when crazed religious fundamentalists get their hands on armies. ‘Tain’t pretty.

And if that didn’t put a chill rushing down your spine, try this:


But Mikey Weinstein, a retired Air Force judge advocate general and founder of the Military Religious Freedom Foundation, said the official statistics masked the great number of those who do not report violations for fear of retribution. Since the Air Force Academy scandal began in 2004, Mr. Weinstein said, he has been contacted by more than 5,500 service members and, occasionally, military families about incidents of religious discrimination. He said 96 percent of the complainants were Christians, and the majority of those were Protestants. [emphasis added]

A special note to you good Christians in the audience: the fundamentalists’ Christianity isn’t yours. Let them get in power. Let them clear out the atheists, pagans, Muslims, Jews, et al, and then they will come for you. I guaran-fucking-tee it.

PZ Myers and John Lynch both have good takes on this New York Times piece. Drop by and take a gander.

So, moving on, then. What are all you all doing on May 1st? I can tell you one thing I won’t be doing: praying.


The National Day of Prayer is Thursday, May 1. I oppose it. I believe religious leaders should call people to prayer, not government officials. I believe religious services should take place in houses of worship, not government buildings.

Alas, the federal courts do not agree with me. Thus, we have a National Day of Prayer. Of course it has been taken over by obnoxious fundamentalist Christians who sponsor exclusionary programs that promote their narrow brand of Christianity.

Of course. Having a heart attack from not surprised here. But Morbo doesn’t stop there, oh, no. He has to go and grind some salt into the wounds:

If we have to have a day like this, it ought to be interfaith. But the National Day of Prayer Task Force, a private group run by Religious Right honcho James Dobson’s wife, Shirley, tells its volunteers not to let anyone near the microphone who has not signed off on a fundamentalist statement of faith.

That statement reads in part:

“I believe that the Holy Bible is the inerrant Word of The Living God. I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and the only One by which I can obtain salvation and have an ongoing relationship with God. I believe in the deity of our Lord Jesus Christ, his virgin birth, his sinless life, his miracles, the atoning work of his shed blood, his resurrection and ascension, his intercession and his coming return to power
and glory.”

Jews and other non-Christians can attend the event. They just get to stand there and be window dressing for the Jesus-athon.

Oh, yes. Truly inclusive, that. Maybe The National Day of Prayer Task Force can call up Major IllWelborn for some troops. Nothing like spreading the word of God with the barrel of a gun, is there?

Finally, by way of Dispatches from the Culture Wars, I present you with a pristine exemplar of the brain rot that can occur when you believe that faith = detatch completely from reality:


This has to be one of the strangest lawsuits I’ve ever heard of. A woman named Joyce Marie Edwards filed a lawsuit in Federal district court in Connecticut – representing herself – against the Federal government, and specifically the Supreme Court, claiming that the Court’s ruling against mandatory school prayer violates the Declaration of Independence and has caused all kinds of bad things.

Apparently Edwards was a volunteer at a local school in her hometown and was told that she could not preach to the kids about Christianity.


Hoo boy. I need a drink before I can even touch this stinking pile of rotten logic. Firstly, where the fuck in the Declaration of Independence does it mandate school prayer? I looked and could not find a single mention of school or prayer, let alone both together. Secondly, what fuckwit thinks you can go bring a case against the Supreme Court without a lawyer? Butterknife to a gunfight, anyone? Thirdly, WTF?

And it gets better. The ever-sharp John Pieret has more detail on her complaints, and he tears her down like a cardboard house in a rainstorm:


Examples from the decision should make the difference between “exposing” the children to something and what Ms. Edwards was doing
clear:


First, while a presenter was discussing the Native American belief in the healing properties of certain stones during a school field trip, Edwards stated “that the only thing I found to truly help me stop doing bad things and healed me was receiving Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior (by reading the Word of God, the Holy Bible).” Second, while distributing candy canes to her oldest child’s class, Edwards stated the
students “could read the Bible and find out
what the white and red mean and why this gift is first for the Jewish people, and then for everyone else.” (References omitted).


Not so strangely, as a result of these incidents, Edwards was precluded from participating in any activities at Booth Hill School during regular school hours by the school principal.


Smart principal, that. I’d be of the opinion that the children would be better off without exposure to the batshit insane, too. Thankfully, this suit was thrown out by the courts, or I would’ve lost all hope of recovering our government from the clutches of the crazed religious.

We do not need people like these dictating how citizens of this country should think. There’s no thought involved, just knee-jerk intolerance of any but the most narrow interpretation of Christianity and a frightening degree of certifiable insanity. I’m all for letting people have their religion, but, for fuck’s sake, there are limits. Freedom of religion does not extend carte blanche for one religion to annihilate the others.

Here endeth the post. The smiting of the intolerant goes ever on.