Just because it’s Saturday, and we could all use something light and cheerful.
Neil Gaiman has finally been spotted on ROFLRAZZI:
And Brian Switek found the cutest baby Apatosaurus in the entire universe:
Hee. It looks like it’s trying to say its first word!
And, in wonderful news, our own Suzanne was on teevee with this gorgeous photo:
How many people can say they got their pitchoor on teevee for their birfdai? Woot!
And I know that every woman who reads this will agree. Here’s PZ reading an email from an idiot (PZ’s response in red):
if “there is no sign of a loving, personal god, but only billions of years of pitiless winnowing without any direction other than short-term survival and reproduction”, then who decides the rules and regulations of man [Woman. Definitely woman.].Aw, yeah!
Think again. Every point you think is a phenomenal benefit is actually a drawback, as the writer of that list so ably demonstrated.
I stumbled across the above post courtesy of Brian Switek, and it’s rather unfortunate I did so whilst at work. I couldn’t help howling with laughter. Coworkers gave me strange looks. That’s okay. As a writer, I get a lot of those. But there are 20 items on the list, and I laughed my ass off at all 20, which I think nearly landed me in my manager’s cubicle for a little Talk about not disturbing the other denizens of the call center.
Can I ever testify to – well, every single item! Such as
2. Writers will write about you. You don’t want this. Trust me.My friends used to pester me to write them into my stories. So I did that once. Strangely, they haven’t asked again…
Look, a writer has to sometimes do utterly awful things to their characters, and just because they’re based on you doesn’t mean they get a free pass. And when we’re annoyed with you, even worse things might happen to “your” character. And we may not see you the way you want to see yourself. The awakening can be a bit rude.
8. Writers are really passionate. About writing. Not necessarily about you. Are you writing?No. You are not. And you will discover this, probably sooner rather than later. I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve abandoned a relationship because the person I’m with is not my writing. After the first flush of hormones vanish, that desperately-wanted relationship sours because Time With Significant Other = Time I Could’ve Spent Writing. It’s hard on a person when the person they’re trying to have sex with is hurrying them along because they want to get back to writing. And what’s a writer thinking about when they’re making the Beast With Two Backs with you? Not you in the majority of cases, I can assure you. Most people I’ve dated can’t handle being second fiddle to a piece of paper. Unless you can, don’t try it.
14. Writers may be able to adjust their schedules for you. Writers may be able to adjust their schedules for writing. Are you writing? Get in line, then.That’s the one that nearly put me on the floor. So damned true!
18. Writers are surrounded by interesting people. Every last one of whom is imaginary.
This is the point where I sank down in my chair, and had I been drinking milk, it would have squirted through my nostrils and caused the folks who service our equipment some serious difficulties. It’s true. Completely and utterly true. The key word here is “surrounded.” I know some very interesting people IRL. I am not surrounded by them because I am too busy writing. The only interesting people who actually surround me are the ones in my head. And you, my dear potential date, play a distant third fiddle to them.
Those are just a few highlights from the list. Go read the whole thing. And the takeaway lesson here is that if you are not an emotionally strong person who’s happy being treated as an inconvenience except when the writer needs a brief bit of nookie or an errand runner, who can tolerate long periods of enforced solitude while your writer writes frantically, and likes to be used as a sounding board, test subject, and therapist, you have no business ever dating a writer.
If you think all of the non-bolded items on that list describe your ideal relationship, then find yourself a writer forthwith. Good luck prying one of us from the page long enough to get a little something started…
In the time-honored tradition of posts that a blogger writes when they’re too busy to write their own content, I have decided to filch a collection of rocks that have made my eyes pop lately. Don’t forget to click through the links for the posts these came from. Enjoy!
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| Gualala turbdites |
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| Bad-ass driller |
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| Glacial drift over advance outwash |
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| Nu’uanu Pali |
You know why I love my geobloggers? Well, if we had to count all the ways, we’d be here for a week. But this post highlights one of the big reasons: they give us eye candy!
If you read only one cartoon this week, read this one (h/t). Warning: reading while eating or drinking may cause serious problems when you get to the end of the strip, so make sure to swallow any and all foodstuffs well before the final panel.
Thank you, Chris, for pointing this one out!
He’ll know what I mean.
Via Ophelia Benson, head-shaking, eye-popping, cat-enthralling proof that dogs will put up with any damned nonsense as long as it makes us happy:
You know what’s really sad? That canine’s a far more talented dancer than I’ll ever be.
Betcha never knew there was a scientific career for you getting dolphins to blow their noses. Brian Switek has the gooey details.
Ed Yong started this origin-of-science-writers extravaganza by asking science writers to tell him all about how they came to be science writers, and while they were at it, give some advice to those who would emulate them. I haven’t had time to read the whole thread – he got a lot of responses – but you don’t have to read far to get great advice. Why, here in Comment #2, we’ve got Mark Henderson dishing up the wisdom, complete with killer parting line:
A few things I’ve learnt…You don’t have to be trained in science to write about it. A scientific training teaches a lot about a little: if you’re a PhD particle physicist, are you really much better off writing about molecular biology than a history or English graduate? Journalists are often (although not always) generalists. Knowing what it’s like to be a lay person can be helpful when you’re communicating with lay people. And you can pick up an awful lot of knowledge as you go along — even becoming fairly specialist in some areas. I’ve recently written a book about genetics. Ian Sample’s just written a book about particle physics. Neither of us has a scientific background in the field.But you do have to understand how science works. You need to grasp the importance of evidence, replication, falsification and so on. If you get that, you’re half way there. You need to be able to at least begin to tell the difference between rigorous work and unfounded assertions.Talk to everyone you can. A journalist in any field is only as good as his or her sources. The answer is always a phone call away — if you don’t know, you can usually find someone who does. And try to remember what they say — don’t just file knowledge under a particular story, store it to build up your own.Learn from your mistakes. We all make them — it’s how you respond that matters. If someone complains that a story you’ve written is inaccurate, and they know a lot about the subject, hear them out. They might be right, and you might have an opportunity to avoid the same mistake in future. They might be wrong — but you’ll have been forced to think about your work, and will try harder to make it more robust next time.If you don’t know what to think, find out what Prince Charles thinks. Then disagree with him.I shall take all of that advice. Especially that last.
That’s the only conclusion I can come to. So many books, so little time and money. The problem has become acute, because I just discovered a whole slew of books I didn’t know existed but desperately need to own.
It all began when Ron posted a comment telling me about the Roadside Geology of Mount Rainier National Park and Vicinity. Why, yes, a little bit of drool did dribble down my chin. Yes, I did shout “ZOMG I love you, Ron, thankyouthankyouthankyou!”
I tend to shout that a lot when I’m reading comments from you lot, actually. Even when you all do make me reconsider the advisability of marriage.
I’ve discovered the book is downloadable via the Washington State Department of Natural Resources for free, which is wonderful, but right now my computer is telling me just how unimpressed it is with the idea of downloading a 300mb+ file. Not to mention, this machine’s a little bulky for whipping out of a messenger bag. So I may have no choice but to order the damned thing. Pas de problem, as we used to say in French class – except while I was searching for a place where I could order that book, I came across this site full of recommended Northwest geology guidebooks.
I am so very, very fucked.
Well, actually, it’s not as bad as all that. I’ve already read quite a few of the books on that page. Just under half, in fact. However, the site’s also full of field trips. Lots and lots of geology field trips.
MOMMY.
It’s going to take time, money, and freedom from the day job to do all of this stuff. As I have yet to become independently wealthy from ye olde writing, there’s nothing for it but to find some indulgent rich gentleman. Or lady. I’m not picky. The poor sod will just have to put up with a homicidal cat and my quirks, not to mention being roundly ignored unless spry enough to accompany me on these trips. Where, actually, they’ll probably be roundly ignored because I’ll be too busy drooling over rocks. And if they’re under the mistaken impression that they’ll have me all to themselves in the winter, well, that’s the writing season, wherein I become a hermit whilst I frantically scribble on ye olde magnum opus. Not to mention, there’s all that reading to catch up on.
But if you’re rich and looking for a good wife who won’t get underfoot as long as you shower her with books on geology and money for field trips, or if you wish to revive the classical concept of patronage, I am now accepting applications.
