Month: January 2014

Fundamentals of Fungi: Wee Black Cups

Dana Hunter19 Comments

Last winter, I saw a scattering of little black bits on one of the tree planter dealies. I thought at first someone had dropped a bit of something from a pocket, but upon bending over, determined it was a scattering of the most delightful wee black cup-shaped fungi I’d ever seen. I didn’t tend to carry the camera everywhere then, and the weather was lousy for a while, and just at the time I had both camera and good weather, some bugger had buried all my wee black cups under a quarter ton of compost.

Next winter, I vowed. I shall photograph them next winter.

And I did. Continue reading “Fundamentals of Fungi: Wee Black Cups” →

Fundamentals of Fungi: Wee Black Cups
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New at Rosetta Stones: A New Installment of the Cataclysm!

Dana Hunter2 Comments

At long last, my darlings, we continue our series on the May 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helens with a brand new, never-before-published post! We’re still on about trees. In this edition, you will learn what the trees caught in the catastrophic May 18th eruption and my teenaged legs have in common. Enjoy!

Stump of fir tree 8 km north of Mount St. Helens showing splinters tilted away from volcano and abrasion on side toward volcano. Photo by R.B. Waitt, Jr. Skamania County, Washington. 1980. Figure 265, U.S. Geological Survey Professional paper 1250. Image and caption courtesy USGS.
Stump of fir tree 8 km north of Mount St. Helens showing splinters tilted away from volcano and abrasion on side toward volcano. Photo by R.B. Waitt, Jr. Skamania County, Washington. 1980. Figure 265, U.S. Geological Survey Professional paper 1250. Image and caption courtesy USGS.

 

New at Rosetta Stones: A New Installment of the Cataclysm!

Adventures in Biblical Literalism: Mountain Majesty

Dana Hunter16 Comments

In the interests of thorough and unbiased research on the foundations of creation “science,” I recently subjected myself to the Book of Genesis. I had to clear my mind of all evidence – supporting or un- – and take the thing at face value for the purposes of my quest. I can now tell you from experience that a literal reading of the Bible is not half so much fun in the New Revised Standard Version. It’s no wonder fundies plump for the KJV.

Let us begin with mountains.

The NRSV assures us, in Genesis 7:19-20, that the waters of the Great God-Will-Fuck-Your-Shit-Up Flood were very deep indeed:

19The waters swelled so mightily on the earth that all the high mountains under the whole heaven were covered; 20the waters swelled above the mountains, covering them fifteen cubits deep.

Well, gosh, that seems pretty deep. But how high were the mountains in those days? The NRSV provides no clude. And so, we turn to the Authorized (King James) Version for our answer, which I am assured by fundamentalists must be there. Continue reading “Adventures in Biblical Literalism: Mountain Majesty” →

Adventures in Biblical Literalism: Mountain Majesty

No. I Won’t Give Churchgoers Cookies For Doing the Minimally Decent Thing.

Dana Hunter7 Comments

A friend pointed me toward this story by telling me a Methodist church got a new pastor, who promptly ran the gay choir director out, and guess how many in the congregation left the church over it? I knew what she was fishing for. She wanted me to feel the warm fuzzies that a bunch of religious folk had protested the treatment of one of their own.

No.

“Eighty percent!” she said, as if the number would change my mind.

Nope. Not impressed.

The conversation stalled shortly after as I refused to debate further whether or not one should encourage such basic human decency by praising it, lest the people involved give up trying to be good due to lack of kudos. I don’t like to have these conversations over chat to begin with, and when it’s chat at my job and I’m trying to work, I like it even less. It takes more time than I have to hammer the point home that I’m not going to give them cookies for doing the minimally decent thing.

Image is an irritated dark gray cat, with the caption "No cookie for you."
Kitty courtesy Isabel Bloedwater via Flickr.

So let me unsling my Smack-o-Matic™ now: Continue reading “No. I Won’t Give Churchgoers Cookies For Doing the Minimally Decent Thing.” →

No. I Won’t Give Churchgoers Cookies For Doing the Minimally Decent Thing.

The Cataclysm: “From Unbaked Fragments to Vitreous Charcoal”

Dana Hunter5 Comments

There’s a fundamental fact one learns about trees when growing up in dry country forests: they’re flammable. Folks in Flagstaff, Arizona can tell what part of summer it is by the smell. If it’s all piney-fresh, it’s May or early June, and everything’s still safely damp from the spring snowmelt; if it smells like warm turpentine and dust, it’s mid-June; and if it smells like winter with all of the fireplaces cozily burning logs, its the late-June-early-July dry-lightning season, and you’re hoping the monsoon rains come before the whole county burns. I’ve seen smoke that looks like a volcanic eruption billowing from fierce fires. I’ve felt like someone caught in the middle of the apocalypse. I’ve choked on wood ash on hot summer nights. Our forests gets so dry you find yourself avoiding heated language in them. Our trees ceased being lovely green oxygen-producers with sweetly-scented wooden trunks and become tiki torches, just waiting for one stray spark to light the place up.

This view of the Schultz Fire, one of Flagstaff's worst, shows just how intense the smoke can get - it looks like the mountains have erupted. You can just barely see the San Francisco Peaks peeking out at the left. "By 1:30 p.m. on June 20, 2010, the Schultz Fire had exploded and was in full-force." No kidding, right? Image courtesy Mike Elson and Coconino National Forest.
This view of the Schultz Fire, one of Flagstaff’s worst, shows just how intense the smoke can get – it looks like the mountains have erupted. You can just barely see the San Francisco Peaks peeking out at the left. “By 1:30 p.m. on June 20, 2010, the Schultz Fire had exploded and was in full-force.” No kidding, right? Image courtesy Mike Elson and Coconino National Forest.

You can imagine my relief when I moved to the Pacific Northwest and discovered that the trees on the western side of the Cascades are usually too wet to burn. But they’re still made of wood. Apply adequate heat, and they’ll at least char. Raise the temperature enough, and you can even persuade them to burst into flames.

The geologists who studied the cataclysmic May 18th eruption can tell you precisely how much heat you need to barbecue a west-side PNW tree in May: they experimented. Continue reading “The Cataclysm: “From Unbaked Fragments to Vitreous Charcoal”” →

The Cataclysm: “From Unbaked Fragments to Vitreous Charcoal”

Many of Your Wishes Are Already My Commands

Dana Hunter18 Comments

Many of you aren’t shy about letting me know what you want – and I sincerely hope you never will be, because it’s easier than guessing. I’m always happy to get meaningful nudges from you. I’m even happier when I can oblige.

Sometimes, I can deliver what you request nearly instantly. Sometimes, it requires research and takes longer. There are times when what you want and what I can deliver don’t mesh – but that’s not to say circumstances won’t change. There are things I can do now that I couldn’t do then, so one never knows. The point is, you should never fail to make your desires known. Just, y’know, prepare for a possibly long wait. And I’ll try to let you know if something is completely impossible for me. Like, for instance, answering email on time. (Look, I answer nearly instantaneously on a geologic timescale, right? So if we could all just manage to live for a few billion years…)

So a few meaningful nudges have been given lately, and I do want to assure you I’m headed in many of the directions indicated.

Image is a Siamese cat staring raptly at a bit of raw salmon being offered with chopsticks. Caption says "Yes, master... your wish is my command"
Continue reading “Many of Your Wishes Are Already My Commands” →

Many of Your Wishes Are Already My Commands

New at Rosetta Stones: Reid Blackburn’s Final Photos

Dana Hunter1 Comment

Several of you alerted me to some incredible news: over 30 years after his death, an undeveloped roll of film Reid Blackburn shot was found and developed. On it, images of Mount St. Helens in the last weeks before the cataclysm. I’ve written a brief piece at Rosetta Stones. Go see some of the last images Reid ever shot.

New at Rosetta Stones: Reid Blackburn’s Final Photos

Imagine A Mountain o’ Thanks

Dana Hunter6 Comments

I put out a mild call for coinage in order to purchase materials necessary to thoroughly investigate creationist nonsense, and several of you came through far above and beyond what I expected. At this rate, I’ll not only be able to afford the creationist books, but the rather more expensive actual-science tomes that will assist in showing the difference between creation “science” and the real deal. I’m a bit overwhelmed right now, honestly. So I’m going to let one of my favorite people in the universe say the thing properly:

Matt Smith as the Doctor, pointing. Caption says, "Who's awesome? You're awesome!"
I can’t tell you how grateful I am. Of course, I’ll be able to show you soon, when I’ve got all the stuff and we’re off on an adventure into a strange alternate reality where sincere people try to prove that a bunch of ancient yarn-spinners were actually relating accurate geologic history right from God. Tell you what, if I had a dollar for every WTF moment I’ve had as I’ve started this project, I’d be offering you guys cash. Yeesh.

Once our BJU textbook is here, which should be only a few days from now, I’ll be able to get us started on quite an edimication. You may want to start replenishing your stock of preferred mind-altering substances now, because you’ll probably need chemical assistance to get through this. I certainly do plan to rely on my amigos Captain Morgan and Jose Cuervo to put my mind back in working order after each session.

I couldn’t do any of this without you, my darlings. Again, thank you!

 

Imagine A Mountain o’ Thanks

Unidentified Flying Dinosaur: First of ’14

Dana Hunter5 Comments

The first day of the year is always one of anticipation for me: I enjoy keeping track of some of the firsts. The first book I’ve read start-to-finish will be The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul, for instance. Not that I haven’t read it before, but it’s been years, and I’d forgotten much of it. The first walk of the year was along North Creek with B, and the first birds we saw (outside of a possible small sparrow) also became the first photos of the year.

UFD I
UFD I

Continue reading “Unidentified Flying Dinosaur: First of ’14” →

Unidentified Flying Dinosaur: First of ’14