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Jan 31 2014

ACE Revealed by Its Own Cartoons

Jonny sent me this rather eye-popping critique of several ACE cartoons. It’s got a jaunty little title – Life According to the Christian Education Curriculum, in Cartoons! – but don’t be fooled into thinking you can read this if your stomach is in an easily-nauseated condition right now. Fortify yourself before clicking.*

You’ll have to let me know which your favorites are. So far, I can’t decide between ACE’s Evil Atheist With Great Hair vs Lil Godbot, or Who Will Feed Me Now That Mommy’s a Feminist?! I do know the winner in the creep category for me, though:

Cartoon is two panels. The first shows a family in a living room. The dad is reading the Bible, saying, "'Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.' Racer, God is pleased when you obey your parents." The second panel shows Racer sitting on his bed in his PJs and robe, reading his Bible. Thought bubble reads, "I will listen and obey my parents."

Image courtesy Jonny Scaramanga.

To the people who write this stuff, this apparently isn’t horrifically creepy indoctrination – it’s just a good education. Show a kid evidence for evolution, on the other hand…

And to think I’ve signed on to read a whole grade of this shit. Including the tests. And those terrible cartoons. I’d ask you to save spare change for the Replace Dana’s Liver fund, but you’re probably going to need that money for your own transplant. I’m so, so sorry.

 

*If the pics don’t show, just click where they should be – they’ve been temperamental.

8 comments

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  1. 1
    rq

    Hahahaha, those are creepy, but great.
    I guess Jesus don’t want none of my nicotine-coloured soul, mwahahahahaaa… Should have known it would be that easy to keep him away.
    As for who shall feed you? HAHAHAHA. *ahem* I’m pretty sure I know a feminist or two who also cooks (because mommy has to feed herself sometime, too). Worst comes to worst, daddy can take a cooking class, because Emancipated Mommy will certainly beat him into submission with that fine bull-hide whip of hers.
    That last one, though – score 1 for critical thinking. Not!

    Good luck with the rest of it. :P

  2. 2
    Trebuchet

    Based just on the one cartoon, it appears they are sharing “artists” with Jack Chick. I shall go view the others when I’ve finished fortifying myself with a second cup of coffee.

  3. 3
    Trebuchet

    Ok, been there, done that. There isn’t enough coffee in the world to have prepared me. They share a lot more than just art with J Chick.

    If I had to chose a “favorite”, I think I’d go with one of the “this skirt is too short” ones. God forbid girls should wear pants!

  4. 4
    heliconia

    Argh. These are creepier than the excessively-legged harvestmen!

  5. 5
    lyle

    Of course this is a message right out of the new testament Ephesians 6.1. So if the bible is their basis which they claim it to be then it follows directly. This of course was the old way of raising children. be seen and not heard etc. So at least the books are following the texts they come from, in fact you might well hear childrens sermons on the same text.

  6. 6
    Marcus Ranum

    Why is his hand under the book? What is the little boy doing that requires him obeying his parent? Why does his bed have bombers on it?

  7. 7
    gworroll

    These are pretty tame.

    Of course, I have a habit of reading Chick Tracts when I’m bored. The storylines in those get much, much worse. They aren’t bad for an occasional laugh, though, mostly at the people who take them seriously.

  8. 8
    markr1957

    You just reminded me to ask my grown up college graduate niece how she survived being brought up by my wicked feminist secularist humanist sister.

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