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May 30 2009

Happy Hour Discurso

Today’s opining on the public discourse.

Short and sweet today, my darlings. It’s not just because I have to pack for the trip, but also because the stupid’s not quite as thick on the ground as usual. I think the right tired itself out frothing over Judge Sotomayor this week.

But there are still a few Cons out there keeping up appearances.

Let us begin with John Yoo, who apparently has the self-awareness of a shrubbery:

From John Yoo, who seems intent on setting a Guiness world record for total lack of self-awareness:

Conservatives should defend the Supreme Court as a place where cases are decided by a faithful application of the Constitution, not personal politics, backgrounds, and feelings. Republican senators will have to conduct thorough questioning in the confirmation hearings to make sure that she will not be a results-oriented voter, voting her emotions and politics rather than the law.

This from the same man who twisted the law into pretzels to justify Bush’s torture regime.

I owe the shrubberies of the world an apology. Comparing John Yoo’s self-awareness to theirs was a grave insult, and I’m deeply sorry.

Perhaps we could compare him to Bill O instead, whose self-awareness is so infinitesimal that electron microscopes have difficulty spotting it:

Yes, Bill O’Reilly, it really is a crappy thing when major public figures — or pissant ankle-biters — can outrageously smear other public figures as “racist” and do so with impunity and repeatedly. That’s what BillO was on about last night, anyway.

But no, he wasn’t talking about Sonia Sotomayor. She’s just a minor figure, after all. O’Reilly was talking about his own august self. Of course.

It was really quite the stomach-churning whinefest. He started off ranting that “my civil rights” and “my rights as an American” had been violated because he’s been branded a “racist” on numerous occasions, which he claims is “libel.” Then he indulged one of his periodic bully-the-women routines (“My rights were violated here!”), where he had on two female lawyers who proceeded to explain to him that he was full of crap. This, of course, did not sit well with O’Reilly, who ended up shaking his finger at them and accusing them of enabling the destruction of America.

Along the way, he managed to emit some momentous howlers:

If I were a minority, they couldn’t do this to me. You know it. You know it, Tonia. If I were African-American like you are, and they started to do all this kind of stuff, I could kill ‘em. And that’s my point now. White Americans, Miss California, their rights are being violated, at least the spirit of their rights, by these unbelievable attacks, personal attacks.

They’re attacking people who disagree with them in very personal ways. That’s what they’re doing. Don’t dodge it.

Then, when they pointed out that the same could be said of his own behavior, he flew into a barely contained rage:

Wait a minute! Hold it! Tonia, keep quiet. I don’t dish it out, madam. I don’t do that stuff. Don’t sit here and say I do. … We don’t do that here. Ever.

And then, at the end of the show? His usual segment of “Pinheads and Patriots.”

You know, I’m starting to feel sympathy for Bill. It’s hard to blame brain-damaged individuals for their lack of brain function.

Speaking of brain damage, I’m not quite sure what Sarah Palin was thinking:

Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin (R) will appear on Comedy Central’s “The Colbert Report” next month in a pre-taped message, the GOP governor said Friday.

On her Twitter page, Palin announced she’d make a cameo on the satirical news show, known for skewering lawmakers and sending-up bombastic conservative television hosts.

Palin tweeted Friday:

Getting ready to tape shout-out for our awesome US troops serving overseas! Will be on ‘Colbert Report’ next month, broadcast from Iraq…

Um. Sarah? The location was supposed to be a secret. And, also, Stephen’s not really a conservative pundit. Just ask George Bush, who found that out the hard way.

While I’m passing out advice, I’ll give some to Michael Steele for free. Michael, you may really want to rethink babbling praise for G. Gordon Liddy:

Yesterday, ThinkProgress reported that former Watergate crook and current hate radio host G. Gordon Liddy had launched perhaps the most offensive attack against Judge Sonia Sotomayor yet. “Let’s hope that the key conferences aren’t when she’s menstruating or something,” said Liddy, adding that she speaks “illegal alien.”

One day after Liddy put his over the top sexism and racism on display, RNC Chairman Michael Steele called on conservatives to quit “slammin’ and rammin’” Sotomayor with personal attacks. Presumably, Liddy’s offensive rant is exactly the message Steele wants to cease, which raises the question of whether Steele will continue to associate himself with Liddy.

As ThinkProgress reported in March, Steele appeared on the Feb. 5, 2009 edition of Liddy’s radio show and told the hardline right-winger that he follows in his footsteps:

STEELE: So, I, you know, I follow the footsteps of guys like you who, you know, who, you know, set the bar and pushed and pushed and pushed and made sure that we could obtain the results that would benefit people in communities, fighting for the rights of individuals and making sure that, you know, we don’t back down. Our opponents don’t back down. Why do we?

Wow. Just… wow. And the fact that the chairman of the RNC fawns over this radioactive fucktard should tell you all you need to know about the GOP.