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Jan 02 2009

Six Degrees of Crazy Christian Lady

Longtime readers may vaguely remember The Crazy Christian Lady. For those who need a refresher, PZ’s your go-to guy:

Here it is: a good Christian homeschooling mom who doesn’t like gay people. And by “doesn’t like”, I mean “wants them stoned to death and everything they touch blown up.”

A friend recently sent me this article about a “gay-friendly” high school. If we were living in a biblical society, homosexuality would be punishable by death so such a school would be unnecessary. Although I’m against the special accommodations, perhaps this new trend of segregation will protect straight kids from these predators. With any luck, some radical will blow up the gay school. No, I’m not condoning vigilantism–I’m merely saying that it would be poetic justice.

That was October. The Crazy Christian Lady got excoriated by us evil atheists, changed her name, password-protected her blog, and faded from the stage. She’s now removed her blog entirely, but Woozle preserved that post here. People like her give cults a bad name.

Tonight, while reading Dispatches from the Culture Wars, I came across this gem:

A reader sends along this link, which he says is not a parody but is actually a serious statement by a guy named Matthew Stucky. He says that Santa Claus (which he spells Clause, for some reason) is satanic and is “corrupting people all over the world.” Oh, and the reindeer are all gay. Seriously.

Santa’s queer reindeer: This was brought to my attention recently & I wanted to share this. The story of Rudolph is he was refused to be able to guide the sleigh because of his red nose.

Names of the 8 reindeer
Blitzen, Comet, Cupid, Dancer, Dasher, Donder, Prancer and Vixen.

These 8 reindeer are supposed to be 8 MALE reindeer. Take a look at those names again. Male reindeer named Dancer, Prancer, Vixen & Cupid.

[snip]

I think from these names we know Vixen, Dancer, Prancer & Cupid are queer reindeer.

Let’s go back to the story of Rudolph & I prove this is true. Rudolph gets shy around girls & his nose turns red. As a result, the other reindeer won’t let him play any reindeer games. That sounds sick, perverted & homosexual. Basically Rudolph like girls because he is straight & as a result they don’t let him participate in their homosexual games.

[snip]

And he knows just what to do about those gay reindeer:

Leviticus 20:13 “If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.”

According to the Bible homosexuality should be punishable by death. I would be overjoyed if every single queer in the entire world died today. The Bible makes it clear they are reprobates who are past the point of salvation. The Bible also makes it clear they are rapists & very wicked people. They have no chance to get saved and no saved person could ever become a queer. Therefore, I would be overjoyed if they all died tonight & our government would actually follow what the Bible states. The death penalty should be enacted for the queers.

Sounds like a wingnut of the week candidate to me.

div.blogMain p.newMeta2 a {display: block; float: left; margin-right: 24px; padding: 3px 0 3px 24px; background-position: 0 50% ! important; background-repeat: no-repeat;} Oh, indeed. Hatred worthy of the Crazy Christian Lady herself. In fact, their mutual hatred sounds remarkably similar. Turns out there’s a good reason for that.

One of the readers, JPF, headed over to Matthew “ZOMG Santa is Satan and his reindeer are fags!11!!!” Stucky’s site and started listening to a sermon Stucky delivered called “Purge Out the Liberals.” He posted some of the highlights in comments for our entertainment. This one caught my eye:

(Sorry to keep going on, but this way wackiness lies.)

“Brother” Stucky is a disciple of Pastor Steven L Anderson of Faithful Word Baptist Church of Mesa, AZ. From Pastor Anderson’s bio:

Pastor Anderson holds no college degree but has well over 100 chapters of the Bible committed to memory, including almost half of the New Testament.

He’s big on Bible memorization and has an entire section on the church site giving methods to memorize verses, including chanting them over and over to yourself as you go about your daily routines.

Pastor Anderson… Pastor Anderson…. Sounded familiar. Didn’t he have something to do with the Crazy Christian Lady? I seemed to remember the Smack-o-Matic and I having endless good fun with a Bible-verse memorizing “Pastor” Anderson and his guest post on CCL’s blog. And indeed, ’tis the very self-same Pastor Steven “Kill All Teh Gays” Anderson who wrote a guest post on her blog entitled “The Truth About Homosexuals,” which contained “truths” such as this:

2. How Do the Sodomites Recruit Others to their Lifestyle?

Every Sodomite in the Bible is a rapist or molester. The Bible tells three sickening stories about Sodomites and every one of the three stories involves someone being violated against their will.


Example #1

And Noah began to be an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard: And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent. And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without. And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness. And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him. – Genesis 9:20-24


The first Sodomite mentioned in the Bible is Ham. Ham took advantage of his own father Noah while he was drunk. He didn’t just see his father’s nakedness; the Bible says that Noah knew what his younger son had done unto him. The first example of homosexuality in the Bible involves a person being violated against his will.

If the Bible is a Rorschach test, these folks belong in a mental institution.

And so we have a sordid little circle of hate, coming right back round to CCL. I guess I should have expected that. Batshit insane rabid gay-haters are a dime a dozen, but these people take it to rather unique extremes. And it’s not just gays and atheists who feel their wrath. They’re so frothing insane they even blacklist Jack Chick and Kirk Cameron as heretics. Seriously.

People like this vote.

Be very afraid.