Evangelist Makes Hilarious Challenge to ISIS Chief


Christian evangelist Bill Keller is nothing if not a master at getting attention, mostly negative, and the Worldnetdaily is gleefully promoting his latest stunt. He’s challenging Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the self-declared Muslim caliph who leads the astonishingly barbaric terrorist group ISIS, to a God-off.

“As an evangelist, my life’s work and desire is to lead lost souls to faith in Jesus Christ. The Bible says it is God’s desire ALL come to repentance, that none be lost. The fact is Jesus died for the sins of ALL men, even Mr. al-Baghdadi,” Keller said.

Al-Baghdadi, 42, recently stepped into the role of “caliph,” saying he would be a “leader for Muslims everywhere.”

But if the ISIS chief does not have a come-to-Jesus moment, Keller says he’s ready for a public demonstration of divine power.

“I will come to Iraq, Syria, any location you desire,” says Keller. “We will each take an unblemished animal, cut that animal into pieces, put those pieces on wood, but not set fire to the wood. Once prepared, you have one hour’s time to call on Allah to rain down fire on your offering. If at the end of that hour Allah has still not answered your pleas, I will call upon the one true God of the Bible … not just to bring down fire on my offering, but yours as well.

“If your god Allah does not answer you … you will resign as the leader of ISIS. You will retire from your life of terror. You will encourage your followers to live in peace and I will be free to return to the United States.

“If your god Allah answers your pleas by fire [and] my God does not, I will renounce the Christian faith, and you’re free to kill me or do whatever you like.”

I’d love to get in on that bet. How about this: If neither of your gods show up and set anything on fire, you have to become gay lovers? Let’s see how strong your faith is.

Comments

  1. Kevin Kehres says

    Wut? Does this guy have some sort of David Copperfield trick that lights stuff on fire?

    Who in the world would make such a challenge if he couldn’t already demonstrate it.

    If I were Al-Baghdadi, I’d say “you go first.”

  2. Hercules Grytpype-Thynne says

    It’s nice the way he’s framed it. “If your god does nothing, you resign. If my god does nothing, I pay no penalty unless your god does something.” It’s almost like he’s banking on neither god bothering to show up.

  3. D. C. Sessions says

    I’d say that they both stand on a mountaintop with a storm coming and see which one is struck by lightning.

    Two go up, only one comes down!

  4. Alverant says

    How about we get Chris Hemsworth to show up in his Thor costume and use his hammer to set something on fire (strike it against some flint near kindling)?

  5. John Pieret says

    you’re free to kill me or do whatever you like

    Umm … If you go into areas of Syria or Iraq controlled by ISIS, I think that is pretty much a given.

  6. birgerjohansson says

    “If neither of your gods show up and set anything on fire, you have to become gay lovers?”
    -You have stated the plot of an upcoming episode of South Park!
    .
    The Wahabites are quite like their Christian counterparts in some political respects:
    “One Ruler, One Authority, One Mosque” Hmm, wasn’t there a Catholic boy from Austria that said something rather similar? http://www.huffingtonpost.com/alastair-crooke/isis-wahhabism-saudi-arabia_b_5717157.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

  7. birgerjohansson says

    “I’d say that they both stand on a mountaintop with a storm coming and see which one is struck by lightning.”
    Somewhere near Cherrapunji in Assam during the monsoon season. One gets struck by lighning, the other falls into a swollen mountain stream on the way back.

  8. says

    Saturday! Saturday! Saturday! Old Testament versus Koran[-an-an]! God versus a different version of God[-od-od]! With special appearances by Jesus Christ and Mohammad[-ad-ad]! At the Imaginarium[-um-um]! You’ll pay for the whole seat, but you’ll only need the edge[-edged-edge]!

  9. Doug Little says

    I suspect that if he makes that journey we will have to shutdown the Darwin awards and declare him the winner of all time.

  10. Abby Normal says

    I’m disappointed. From the headline I was hoping for something like…

    Yo god’s dick so small after knocking up Mary she was still a virgin.
    Yo god’s so ugly drawing his picture is a capital crime
    Yo god’s so dumb it took him 13 billion years to make 7 days

  11. fusilier says

    @7 birgerjohansson says

    Le Roi Soliel said it best, and first – un fei, un pei, un roi!

    No apologies for spelling – it was the XVIIth Century, after all.

  12. lldayo says

    Saturday! Saturday! Saturday! Old Testament versus Koran[-an-an]! God versus a different version of God[-od-od]! With special appearances by Jesus Christ and Mohammad[-ad-ad]! At the Imaginarium[-um-um]! You’ll pay for the whole seat, but you’ll only need the edge[-edged-edge]!

    I’m actually looking forward to one of the events leading up to the main one, Easter “Chocolate Thunder” Bunny vs Santa “The Sleigher” Claus, for the middle weight belt. The main event looks interesting though!

  13. brucegee1962 says

    Actually, the original Biblical story sure looks as if someone was using some type of flammable liquid to pull a fast one on some gullible watchers. I doubt it would work nowadays, though.

  14. howardhershey says

    Am I mistaken in thinking that the God of Christians and the God of Muslims and the God of the Jews are supposed to be one and the same God? Is this some more of the trinity stuff, only now there are five different forms of the One True God? Perhaps they are seeking the right intermediary by which to interact with their God.

  15. busterggi says

    I’ve seen this contest in old movies where the great white explorer shows his ‘magic’ by using a lighter or transistor (I did say old) radio.

  16. matty1 says

    @18 That’s actually a tricky one, unless you think there is an actual god receiving the prayers of Christians, Muslims and Jews but not Hindus then whether the similarities in the stories are enough to make the character the same is a matter of opinion. As someone put it it’s like asking if Gandalf in the films is the same person as Gandalf in the books.

  17. lofgren says

    This is an Old Testament story for anybody who didn’t catch the reference. One of the Judges (Samuel, maybe?) challenged the priests of anothr god to this same challenge. When their god failed to appear, the Hebrew judge dumped three buckets of “water” onto the fire and Jehovah spontaneously lit the whole mess up.

    In other words, this is something that both men claim their god has done in the past, just to settle a bet.

  18. Martin says

    Both get consumed by fire and a booming voice says “Too bad but the Jews were right.”

  19. lorn says

    I say we let the followers of their opposite number behead them and the first one to reattach or regrow their head wins. If after 24 hours neither pops back to life we call it a tie.

  20. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    @ ^ Lorn & #27 Martin & 12. Abby Normal : LOL! Good ones.

    Actually whilst there’s zero chance of this being taken up I reckon this challenge of Bill Keller is a bloody good idea!

    The fact that the “Caliph” Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi isn’t himself in the frontlines and seeking “martyrdom” seriously but hiding from it instead – like all the Islamist leader douchebags is proof he doesn’t practice what he preach or really believe in it at all.

    If Jihadists really believed in Allah they wouldn’t be terrorists but would fight and die in the open instead – or just get their mythical murderous moongod to do their work for them.

  21. hexidecima says

    this is great! I’ve asked other TrueChristians for years to do this with me and they’ve always refused, citing many excuses. I’ve always offered to let them pray as much as they want and I’d use a Zippo or even just a magnifying glass on a sunny day. Now I have one RealTrueChristian who I can point to as willing to test his god!

  22. markr1957 says

    Lofgren @ # 24, you’re thinking of the prophet Elijah in 1 Kings 18. The BBC did a show years back demonstrating how that trick was entirely doable using only Early Bronze Age knowledge and locally available materials.
    The other bit from that book of the OT often overlooked is that after the priests of the other religion were slaughtered conjuring tricks were banned, effectively making it impossible for anyone else to figure out how the trick was done and debunk it.

  23. markr1957 says

    @ #31 – how I need an edit button. I meant to finish by commenting on how typical of a Christian High Priest that kind of trickery would be.

  24. hexidecima says

    Thought folks might like to know…. I sent an email to Mr. Keller offering to take the challenge with him. I got a response back and you can guess just what it was, I’m sure. You can see my musings on his response on my blog, clubschadenfreude (dot) com if you’d like. I haven’t put up his response verbatim and am waiting on permission to do that. We’ll see if I get it.

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