Hagee: Blood Moons Start of End Times


Early Tuesday morning we had the first of four “blood moons” — eclipses where atmospheric conditions make the moon look blood red — and a whole bunch of Christian conservatives of the premillenial variety have been heralding it as the sign of…well, something really important. John Hagee is one of them.

Hagee, pastor of Texas’ Cornerstone Church, has written a book on the phenomenon titled Blood Moons: Something is About to Change. And he is airing a live television event on Tuesday to reveal “direct connections between four upcoming blood-moon eclipses and what they portend for Israel and all of humankind.”

“Is this the end of the age?” Hagee asked during a recent sermon, before quoting Acts 2:19-20: And I will show wonders in Heaven above and signs in the Earth beneath, the sun shall be turned into darkness and the moon into blood before the coming of the great and awesome day of the Lord.”

“I believe that the heavens are God’s billboard, that he has been sending signals to planet Earth,” he explained. “God is literally screaming at the world, ‘I’m coming soon.’”

Hagee predicted that the four eclipses were signaling a “world-shaking event that will happen between April 2014 and October 2015.”

“God sends planet Earth a signal that something big is about to happen! He’s controlling the Sun and the moon right now to send our generation a signal, but the question is, are we getting it?”

You know what the blood moons portend? Absolutely nothing. Here’s video of him selling this moronic snake oil to his credulous followers.

Comments

  1. MarcusC says

    And again I wonder, does he actually believe his own bullshit? Or, is he and actor who’s figured out a good way to get a fat paycheck?

  2. frankniddy says

    “God is literally screaming … ‘I’m coming soon.’” That’s bad news for Mrs. God. ;-)

  3. Kevin Kehres says

    Actually, Hagee is literally screaming “BUY MY BOOK ON THE SUBJECT”.

    It was number 5 on Amazon (no kidding) last time I checked. As always with these slimy toads, follow the money.

  4. Hercules Grytpype-Thynne says

    Early Tuesday morning we had the first of four “blood moons” — eclipses where atmospheric conditions make the moon look blood red

    This is certainly false. We can’t possibly know what atmospheric conditions will make future eclipses look like.

    The term “blood moons” is being used by Hagee to refer to a series of four consecutive lunar eclipses. There’s more info about it here.

    The term “pink moon” has also been applied to the recent eclipse. It doesn’t actually refer to color either, see here.

  5. says

    The fact that we can predict the occurrence of “blood moons” by understanding the natural processes that cause them kind of suggests that they are not the product of supernatural control of the heavens. The very fact that he can predict them denies the conclusion he’s drawing from those predictions!

    Do you suppose he knows this, and is just shamelessly manipulating credulous people, or if he really is this delusional?

  6. dingojack says

    Dear Mr NutJob –
    See here.
    Sorry if that bursts ya bubble*.
    Dingo
    ——–
    * Lunar eclipses are not that infrequent, deal with it

  7. sunsangnim says

    When I saw the dates of future eclipses, I was wondering if he actually took 2 minutes on Google to look them up or if he pulled the dates out of his ass. The dates are correct. http://eclipse.gsfc.nasa.gov/OH/OH2014.html

    But that begs the question: if you understand that people can predict eclipses, how does it make any sense that God is moving things around at his will to send us a message?

  8. Larry says

    And, when nothing happens as a result of the eclipses, the so-call prophecies will be forgotten whilst Hagee and his ilk will move on to the next shiny object with which the flock can be fleeced.

  9. John Pieret says

    He’s controlling the Sun and the moon right now to send our generation a signal …

    Ummm … if God is controlling the Sun and the moon, then how does Hagee know that there are going to be three more lunar eclipses? The only way that they have been predicted is based on the consistent laws of motion and astrophysics. If God is controlling the Sun and moon (and Earth, you moron), the best way for he/she/it to let us know that is to change the orbits so that one or more of the predicted eclipses don’t happen.

  10. Kevin Kehres says

    @8…but you have to notice how completely non-specific Hagee is about what would fulfill his “prophecy”.

    Cataclysm. Some kind of. Nonspecific. Could be anything from a stock market downturn to a big earthquake to the Democrats retaining control of the Senate. Anything at all, in fact.

    Oh no. Hagee is going to claim the gift of prophecy for sure. Because in the space of 18 months, something will happen. Because something always happens.

    Sadly, he’s only 74, so I can’t prophecize that he won’t survive to claim his victory. These cretins are long-lived. Billy Graham is still hanging on in his 90s. Only the good die young, as Billy Joel once proclaimed.

  11. says

    “And, when nothing happens as a result of the eclipses, the so-call prophecies will be forgotten whilst Hagee and his ilk will move on to the next shiny object with which the flock can be fleeced.”

    Technically, according to his religion, false prophecy is a capital offense…

  12. Chiroptera says

    “God is literally screaming at the world, ‘I’m coming soon.’”

    Uh, no, if he were literally screaming, “I’m coming soon,” then we’d be hearing a voice booming from the sky, “I’m coming soon.” Which would then make the evangelicals’ nonsense somewhat plausible.

    Ever notice how the evangelicals’s God keeps talking to us through ambiguous signs that always have alternative naturalistic explanations? Why, it’s almost as if he doesn’t really give a shot.

  13. dugglebogey says

    Fucking CAVEMEN used to believe this shit. Haven’t we advanced at least past this bullshit. Holy fuck.

  14. Chiroptera says

    I hate typing on mobile devices. I can’t pat attention to the tiny keyboard and keep an eye on the Autocorrect at the same time.

  15. Randomfactor says

    If his god is so all-fired all-powerful, let’s see him PREVENT the next three scheduled eclipses.

    Because THAT would be impressive.

  16. says

    Eh, Chiroptera @12 stole what I was going to say.

    This whole God business would be a lot more believable if he literally did scream at us every now and then. Covering the moon with the Earth’s shadow isn’t very impressive. Didn’t David Copperfield do that one back in the ’80s?

  17. says

    “God is literally screaming at the world, ‘I’m coming soon.’”

    Oh man, if not for that vacuum of space we would be able to hear God’s literal screams. But then wouldn’t we die or something if we actually heard God’s voice? Or is it just seeing him that kills (sometimes)?

  18. countryboy says

    Geez dugglebogey , don’t insult cavemen. They were probably more intelligent than Hagee and his ilk.

  19. Michael Heath says

    This is a great example on how religion makes people act stupid. Not necessarily Hagee, but his certainly devotees. Hagee’s very popular where I live, similar to how Hal Lindsay was popular in the 1970s in this neck of the woods.

  20. tbp1 says

    There have been at least a dozen articles (actually more like advertisements for some guy’s book) on this subject over at WND, each more stupid than the last.

    As others have pointed out, these are entirely natural phenomena, as predictable as sunrise, sunset, or the tides, just not as frequent. You’d think a good omen would be something not completely predictable, something actually surprising and inexplicable. You know, a miracle.

    And even if there were such a thing as an omen, what good is an omen if people can’t agree on what it means?

    And why can’t an omnipotent, omniscient deity come up with a more efficient manner of communication?

  21. otrame says

    @1

    John Hagee is a liar. He lies consistently and when telling the truth would be more effective than lying. I’ve seen him tell outrageously and obviously false stories about a “Good Christian Woman™” who stuck by her husband while he was in jail, when simply telling the true story about a woman who stuck by her man while he was in jail would have been fine. When I say “obviously false” I mean she would go late at night to the fields where the prisoners worked (this is at Huntsville) and leave clothes detergent so her husband could wash clothes for the other prisoners and make a little money, which he sent to her, like the Good Christian Man™ he had presumably become after whatever crime it was he committed. And if you believe any part of that, friends, I’ve got a bridge I’d like to sell you and Hagee has a truly enormous number of books for sale as well.

    The very first time I saw him, shortly after we moved back to San Antonio (back in the day I always looked for the biggest megapreacher wherever we were, under the theory that you need to know what your enemy is up to) he said that a million children are sacrificed to Satan every Halloween in the US. Flat statement, in a tone that suggested that everybody knows it and his big old audience just nodded their heads and looked solemn.

    As I’ve said before, the problem is not Hagee, it’s Hagee’s audience.

  22. busterggi says

    Couldn’t see the ‘blood moons’ up my way because of clouds.

    Guess my little portion of Earth is safe from god.

  23. felidae says

    “The heavens are God’s billboard”–couldn’t a omniscient, omnipotent being have put up some real terrestrial billboards if he wanted to send humanity a message? After all, he made the universe, so why would he fuck around with nebulous shit like a blood moon

  24. Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says

    Why is it that guys are always hearing blood moons and looking up at the sky.

    Hello?

    Blood moons aren’t a harbinger of the end of humanity except in the sense that you need to be born before you die…

    Sheesh.

  25. dingojack says

    Dear Millennials –
    Can you PLEASE teach god how to send a text message, or twitter or something. Sheesh.
    Dingo

  26. Crudely Wrott says

    I’m with felidae @25. Hagee says:

    “I believe that the heavens are God’s billboard, that he has been sending signals to planet Earth,” he explained. “God is literally screaming at the world, ‘I’m coming soon.’”

    If this god has a billboard and it’s the whole damned sky, for crying out loud, why doesn’t it write something on it? Like maybe moving the stars around to form letters and words and things like comprehensible messages?

    Stuff like the aforementioned “I’m coming” or, “Tighten up, y’all! Time is short” or “Drink more Ovaltine”.

    Then there’d be no problem; everyone* would believe.

    *for some value of everyone.

  27. says

    @18:

    Michael Rich, tread carefully. I was thinking about using Snake Plissken’s photo as my gravatar* until I got a mysterious phone call from–well, let’s just say it was a bad idea on my part.

    “The term “pink moon” has also been applied to the recent eclipse.”

    So, is it cosmological conjunctivitis or, gasp! a sign of the coming GAYPOCALYPE!!?

    * I actually look quite a bit like him, except for the hair and the being “ripped” part–and the sneer–but I totes have the eye patch from when I scratched my cornea a while back. I usually only wear it on September 19th, though.

  28. thebookofdave says

    He’s controlling the Sun and the moon right now to send our generation a signal, but the question is, are we getting it?

    Yeah, I think so. The Sun and moon are following a predictable course, uncorrected by any controller input: autopilot. So God’s signal to his creation must be: “There’s no reason to become alarmed and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?”

  29. birgerjohansson says

    “God is literally screaming at the world”

    In case no one recalls the movie posters for “Alien” back in 1977 , let me remind you “in space, no one can hear you scream!”

  30. sqlrob says

    I think the events in Acts coming true would be a good start at proving god. Moon between the sun and earth at the same time the earth is between the moon and the sun? Yeah, that’s a trick.

    I wonder if the writers of Acts were having an inside joke against the readers. Make something that sounds good, point and laugh at the people falling for it.

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