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GOP Lobbyist: Ban Gay Players From NFL

A well-connected and powerful Republican lobbyist is trying to gin up interest in Congress for a bill that would ban gay men from playing in the NFL, which would have little chance of ever passing but will get Jack Burkman branded as the bigoted jerk that he is.

Jack Burkman, CEO of Burkman LLC, who heads what is DC’s top-rated lobbying firm, said today that he is working on legislation that would ban gays from joining the National Football League.

Burkman said he has amassed the political support for such a bill.

”We are losing our decency as a nation,” Burkman said. ”Imagine your son being forced to shower with a gay man. That’s a horrifying prospect for every mom in the country. What in the world has this nation come to?”…

“If the NFL has no morals and no values, then Congress must find values for it,” said Burkman.

Really? You’ve got guys in the NFL who are deadbeat dads, wife beaters, accused rapists, drunk drivers and who knows what else, but it’s gay men that have to be banned? Seriously? And the punchline: HuffPo reports that Burkman’s name appeared on the client list of the DC Madam a few years ago. Perhaps if major lobbying firms have no morals and no values, Congress must find values for them.

Comments

  1. Richard Smith says

    Burkman’s name appeared on the client list of the DC Madam a few years ago

    Yeah, but that’s straight sex. Straight sex that you pay for is still morally superior to gay sex of any sort. Because.

  2. says

    Well, they could just shutdown the NFL.

    Or is it only the openly gay players that they want to ban?

    No, I am not suggesting that they are all gay. But I do suspect that there are enough gay NFL players, that banning them all would cause big problems.

  3. John Pieret says

    “If the NFL has no morals and no values, then Congress must find values for it,” said Burkman.

    On what constitutional basis could Congress justify such a law in light of Lawrence v. Texas? Taking away a person’s right to earn a living is as much a penalty under the law as criminalizing homosexual acts. It is actually worse, since such a law would be penalizing someone for just being gay, not because of specific sexual acts.

  4. eric says

    Burkman said he has amassed the political support for such a bill.

    Call me skeptical. I doubt there are even many in the GOP who would touch this idea. I think what’s going on here is that Burkman had meetings with some congresscritters to float his idea. Those folks lied to his face about supporting him, in order to score points and because they know his “bill” will never even make it to the consideration stage. This is nod-along-eyeroll-when-he’s-not-looking stuff.

  5. says

    ”Imagine your son being forced to shower with a gay man. That’s a horrifying prospect for every mom in the country.

    I doubt most mothers in have ever thought of their sons being forced to shower with anyone.

    Because outside of prison (in which nobody seems to care about the possibility), that doesn’t happen.

    If you go to the gym, there are probably gay people in your locker room. Are you and your mother horrified about that? When I lived in Denmark, I went swimming regularly at a gym where the showers were communal. You showered communally, naked (suits were not allowed to be on), or you didn’t get to swim. I’m not sure whether I ever told my mother about that or not, to give her the chance to be horrified. It never crossed my mind.

  6. psweet says

    Even without Lawrence v. Texas, how does a lobbyist think it’s a good idea for Congress to tell a bunch of privately owned corporations who they can hire? I could understand a blanket law removing any anti-discrimination protections for any companies, although it would still fail the Constitutional test. But this? Why not a bill saying that Burkman LLC can’t hire anyone who urges Congress to encourage discrimination?

  7. jnorris says

    I’ve read Mr Burkman has already lost one client over this stunt. I wonder how many potential clients are banging on his door to hire him.

  8. says

    Gretchen “If you go to the gym, there are probably gay people in your locker room.”
    THIS ISNT ABOUT THEM BEING GAYHOMOS. THIS IS ABOUT US NORMAL AMERICANS KNOWING THEYRE GAY. THEM BEING “OUT” (IN PUBLIC NO LESS!) INFRINGES ON OUR GODGIVEN CONSTITUTIONALLYPROTECTED FREEDOM OF IGNORANCE.
     
    SURE “THEY” HAVE TO STAY IN THE SO-CALLED CLOSET BUT THATS A SMALL PRICE TO PAY TO PROTECT THE RIGHT OF US NORMAL AMERICANS TO NOT KNOW THEYRE GAYHOMOSEXUALS.
     
    BESIDES ITS EASIER TO GAY-BAIT AND MARGINALIZE THEM WHEN THE ONLY EXAMPLES OF REALWORLD HOMOSEXUALS ARE THE WEIRDOS AND PERVERTS AT THE SOCALLED “GAY” SOCALLED “PRIDE” SOCALLED “PARADE” THAT SO CAPABLY FREAK OUT THE SQUARES. SQUARES LIKE US NORMAL AMERICANS! GAYHOMOS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE A THREAT, NOT ELLEN DEGENERES!

  9. says

    ““If the NFL has no morals and no values, then Congress must find values for it,” said Burkman.”

    Inclusiveness is a value, you twit.

  10. noastronomer says

    What, no jokes about Congress not being to find values even if they were given a map and a flashlight? I’m disappointed.

    Mike.

  11. pacal says

    Of course Burkman wants the ban. After all the existence of Gay NFL players violates the stereotype that all Gay men are “silly queens”.

  12. dingojack says

    Modus (#10) – no This is about, the SACRED RIGHT of Americans Not to be OffeNded,,, nevar Evar!!!
    @@ Dingo

  13. says

    Maybe he’d be happy if they just had a “GAYcam” at the games. It could be equipped with the new GOPGAYdar that will only show outGAYZ, cuz’, GOD forbid, without that it might show some people that we’d rather not know were teh GAY.

  14. bushrat says

    Isn’t football that sport where a bunch of guys wear tight butt hugging cloths, bend over infront of each other while one guy reaches between another guys legs to grab his ball. Then they all chase that guy until they catch him and they all pile on top of him in a writhing mass of man meat. All of this while there is a chorus line of scantily clad beauties parading around the sidelines, that the players completely ignore the entire game, while they’re chasing each other around playing grab ass.

    But this guy is worried about allowing openly gay players in the NFL?

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