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Senate Candidate Speaks, Sings in Tongues

Kathleen Tonn is running for the U.S. Senate from Alaska. I can’t imagine the video she posted to Youtube last weekend and then apparently removed is going to help. She recorded herself speaking and singing in tongues to save someone named Suzie. Even the Christian Post seems a bit skeptical.

In the video published on YouTube Saturday, Tonn is shown singing and witnessing to the woman she identified as Suzie in the steam room at the Alaska Club West.

“I’m at the Alaska Club West and I’m spending a little time in the steam room with Suzie. Suzie doesn’t know Jesus Christ as her savior, but ironically she has a pastor/priest who is her neighbor. So she has allowed me to sing and deliver a message in the Holy Ghost and tongues,” said Tonn in the video.

Uh, no. That isn’t irony. It isn’t even coincidence, really. One has nothing at all to do with the other. But it gets better:

She then explained why she chose to deliver the message in tongues.

“Speaking in tongues or singing in tongues is very valuable because the message cannot be understood by Satan. But the Holy Spirit can use that message to bring deliverance, to bring clarity, to bring discerning and words of wisdom and knowledge. And tongues is interpreted by a person who has the gift of interpretation,” she explained.

Okay, so you speak in tongues to confuse Satan, then you have someone translate it…because Satan can’t understand the translation either? And where was the person to do the translating here? Seriously, this kind of dumb should hurt. Here’s the video:

Comments

  1. moarscienceplz says

    I had someone speak to me in tongues once. Believe me, I understood perfectly everything I needed to know from him.

  2. raven says

    “Speaking in tongues or singing in tongues is very valuable because the message cannot be understood by Satan.

    ????

    So where is this in the bible? It isn’t. Xians just make stuff up as they go along. Much of what xians believe isn’t even from the bible.

    Which isn’t that unusual. It’s clear the bible was written long ago by…people just making stuff up as they went along.

    And tongues is interpreted by a person who has the gift of interpretation,”

    Oh really? The most common messages seem to be, “Send me money” and “Vote for the Tea Party”.

  3. says

    By the way, I studied daemonic for a while and she’s speaking Alte-Enochian. She’s more likely inhabited by a demon. Maybe two.

    Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fghtan!

  4. sinned34 says

    I received the holy spirit and the gift of speaking in tongues as a Christian teen. Turns out it wasn’t as great a gift as I had hoped it was. I have been an atheist for a decade now, and when I tried to return that gift, I couldn’t even get store credit for it. I wonder if I could get anything for it if I put it on EBay or Kijiji.

  5. busterggi says

    See, Nigerian and Ugandan politicians are just as advanced as fundie Christian US politicians.

    Comforting or terrifying, your choice.

  6. Richard Smith says

    I’ve recieved a gift of tongues in a steam room before… Oh. Speaking in… Never mind.

  7. says

    @8

    I wonder if I could get anything for it if I put it on EBay or Kijiji

    I’d think Etsy would be a great marketplace for such a gift.

  8. John Pieret says

    The question I have is, if she started to talk in tongues on the Senate floor, would anyone notice?

  9. says

    And people said that there’s no way there is a worse potential Senate candidate from Alaska than Sarah Palin.

    I hope the person being jabbered at has gotten a restraining order from this creepy woman.

  10. says

    Tonn makes it very clear she’s got to make it quick, since her camera’s battery hasn’t long to last.

    MoTWYW. But, it seems she cares more about the message than the meaning.

  11. says

    Tongues is one of the topics I find funny in Christianity. I don’t know the history behind the notion, but I wonder if speaking in gibberish is a mutated version of the alleged miracle where the disciples managed to suddenly gain proficiency in foreign languages so they could preach. Back in the olden days before the internet and easy recording devices, it was probably easy to fake such a miracle with a plant gibbering in an accent and the disciple just gibbers back in similar fashion.

    I wonder if they just forgot that the whole purpose was to pretend to be suddenly fluent in foreign languages. Alternatively, someone might have noticed the act, and the whole divine language thing was made up on the spot as an ad hoc explanation.

  12. freehand says

    sinned34: I received the holy spirit and the gift of speaking in tongues as a Christian teen. Turns out it wasn’t as great a gift as I had hoped it was. I have been an atheist for a decade now, and when I tried to return that gift, I couldn’t even get store credit for it. I wonder if I could get anything for it if I put it on EBay or Kijiji.

    My recommendation – scrub it thoroughly, then let it dry overnight. Paint it a nice earth color, perhaps raw sienna. Go to a plant nursery, find a potted arrangement you like, and buy those plants. Put ‘em in the h.s., and voila! A nice new conversation piece for the garden. They weather nicely.

  13. freehand says

    Bronze Dog – I always figured that some Fundies back in the day were just too dumb to understand what they were reading.

    1 Corinthians 12:10
    American Standard Version (ASV)
    10 and to another workings of miracles; and to another prophecy; and to another discernings of spirits; to another divers kinds of tongues; and to another the interpretation of tongues.

    I’m thinking that this means some speak other languages and some can translate other languages to Greek, but that doesn’t really make any sense.

    I had never thought of your idea of this being a scam, but that makes sense.

  14. hunter says

    Ah, just another Sarah Palin wannabe.

    Except when Palin spoke in tongues, she called it a campaign speech.

  15. lorn says

    People on the right often speak-in-tongues, frequently referred to as ‘dog whistles’. This just a slightly more refined version.

  16. says

    There is an episode in the second chapter of Acts in the Bible which clearly describes an episode of speaking in tongues (or “glossolalia”) where the languages are not supposed to be some goofy kind of sacred gibberish, but actual languages:

    6 Now when this was noised abroad, the multitude came together, and were confounded, because that every man heard them speak in his own language.
    7 And they were all amazed and marvelled, saying one to another, Behold, are not all these which speak Galilaeans?
    8 And how hear we every man in our own tongue, wherein we were born?
    9 Parthians, and Medes, and Elamites, and the dwellers in Mesopotamia, and in Judaea, and Cappadocia, in Pontus, and Asia,
    10 Phrygia, and Pamphylia, in Egypt, and in the parts of Libya about Cyrene, and strangers of Rome, Jews and proselytes,
    11 Cretes and Arabians, we do hear them speak in our tongues the wonderful works of God.
    12 And they were all amazed

    That’s a pretty good miracle and is supposed to have occurred as a gift of the Holy Ghost at Pentecost. Today’s tongue-speakers can only dream of such a gift. The instantaneous acquisition of fluency in a never-studied foreign language would be a pretty fine miracle. On top of all that, it appears that different listeners heard different languages, depending on their land of origin. That beats even the UN’s practice of simultaneous translation. One doubts the historical veracity of this account.

  17. caseloweraz says

    Busterggi: BTW, who does a session in a steam room while dressed?

    Apparently, someone who plans to film her act of faith and help to “Suzie” in order to enhance her campaign chances. Because an audio recording wouldn’t do the trick. And she has to be dressed, of course, because revealing the human body as her God made it, “in the glory of [its] nakedness”*, is just improper.

    * quoting a line from Lust for Life.

  18. Scr... Archivist says

    Speaking in tongues or singing in tongues is very valuable because the message cannot be understood by Satan.

    So it’s some kind of Christian encryption? I wonder if it works against the NSA….

  19. dingojack says

    Scr… Archivist – Yep, but only the Naturist/Satanist Association.*
    Dingo
    ——-
    * I’ve heard it confuses weak minds and the National Association of Marlon Brando Look-Alikes too.

  20. arakasi says

    I went to a Catholic high school back in the late 80’s. One of the religion teachers was a part of the (thankfully small) Charismatic Catholic movement. One of my friends took his class and organized a prank. Since he typically started off class with the Our Father, they got all of the other students to recite the prayer in whichever language they were taking.

    For one brief, shining moment, the teacher thought the entire class was speaking in tongues and almost fainted from the excitement. Yeah, my friend caught crap for that for the rest of the year, but he claimed that it was worth it. At least the teacher toned down his preaching for a while, and I think he left after that year.

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