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Jan 16 2014

Klingenschmitt Doesn’t Like Legal Pot Because…Demons!

Our old pal Gordon Klingenschmitt, who thinks he has a secret decoder ring that helps him “discern” the “demonic spirits” attacking people he’s never even met, is opposed to the legalization of marijuana in his home state of Colorado because it might cause hallucinations, which are “not just biological; they’re actually demonic.” Apparently he’s been reading the book of Revelation again.

17 comments

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  1. 1
    richardelguru

    Either that or what he smokes has been cut with something rather nasty.

  2. 2
    Set Kouwenhoven

    I El Gordo’s defense, I thought I was Satan the first time I took ‘shrooms.

    Also in his defense, it was a great trip.

  3. 3
    Set Kouwenhoven

    *in

  4. 4
    tsig

    What’s much scarier, I once smoked pot so strong I saw GOD!!

  5. 5
    D. C. Sessions

    Speaking of John’s book and hallucinations, how’s Gordo with the legal status of cave gasses?

  6. 6
    bahrfeldt

    I had suspected bad peyote, but after listening to him I might conclude he is either on paint fumes or smoking his car’s tail pipe. Just speculation, of course.

  7. 7
    cptdoom

    I love the “you become a pothead and you lose your IQ.” Well, actually no one can lose their IQ, as it’s a measurement of intellectual capability, so everyone has one. It might change over time if one lost some of that intellectual capacity, but perhaps you have to have some to lose to understand that. Oh, and I will admit to smoking a lot of pot in college – during which I managed a double major, published two papers with a professor & fellow students based on our independent research, was elected to Phi Beta Kappa and graduated Magna cum laude.

  8. 8
    d.c.wilson

    Gordo blames demons for burning his toast.

  9. 9
    Loqi

    Nitrous oxide also causes hallucinations. It would be a pity if Klingenschmitt were to violate his own ethics by using it at his next oral surgery. It would really be best for everyone if he just toughed it out…

  10. 10
    freehand

    Should we assume that he is as knowledgeable about demons, gods, and morality as he is about pot?

  11. 11
    gorgias

    Reading the book of Revelation again? Do you really think he ever stopped?

  12. 12
    caseloweraz

    I would direct the Rev’s attention to this word: ergot.

    Specifically to the fungus species Claviceps purpurea, also known as rye ergot fungus.

    Are the hallucinations it causes also demonic, in his view?

  13. 13
    Bronze Dog

    Oh, and I will admit to smoking a lot of pot in college – during which I managed a double major, published two papers with a professor & fellow students based on our independent research, was elected to Phi Beta Kappa and graduated Magna cum laude.

    You see?! Pot turned you into one of a part of the educated, intellectual segment of society that’s against us! [/snark]

    Revelation? I remember reading it for the first time in The Brick Testament. The bizarre spectacle depicted (made more surreal by being illustrated in Lego) reminded me of Altered States, and this one interview I saw on TV with someone who went on a drug-induced spiritual journey. IIRC, he described walking up into the clouds on a trail of smoke and hanging out with one of his deities and various sacred animals. I forget his background and what drug was involved, but I’m leaning towards something meso-American.

    I’ve led a sober life, but Revelation reads exactly like the sort of thing I’d imagine an early Christian would experience on a drug trip, or at least a particularly strange and vivid dream. I was raised as a liberal Christian, and it’s jarring how different the aesthetic felt from the sort of imagery they’d use in Sunday School. Kind of makes me think of Lovecraft and weird anime where initially human-looking gods and saints turn out to be tentacle and eye monsters.

  14. 14
    busterggi

    But Gordo must know that his bible says that humanity can partake of all the plants of the earth except those two particular trees.

    Once again he display his hatred of his own god.

  15. 15
    tuibguy

    Most revealing when he disdains the spirit of pleasure. Isn’t that what fundamentalism is all about? Deny yourself pleasure on this world so that you are entitled to an eternity of it. Not logical, of course. A little is bad but a gigantic amount forever is somehow good.

  16. 16
    WMDKitty -- Survivor

    I’m happily medicated, and… what the fuck is this guy on about?

  17. 17
    sailor1031

    Seems a good exorcist is needed for the rev. Gordon. At lesat my demon knows the difference between pot (no hallucinations) and LSD (big hallucinations)….

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