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Jan 09 2014

Wingnuts Fantasize About Stoning Gay People

Kevin Swanson and Dave Buehner of Generations Radio, both of whom are staunch theocrats of a Reconstructionist bent, are hopping mad about the Rose Parade float that featured a gay couple getting married. So they fantasize about what would happen if they had a float that showed a gay person getting stoned to death:

Swanson: They’ll also witness a controversial same-sex wedding, courtesy of the AIDS Healthcare Foundation. According to the Pasadena Star News, a pair of homosexual hairstylists will ‘marry’ along the parade route while riding a wedding cake-shaped float sponsored by the AIDS group.

Buehner: This is an AIDS group? This is a group that’s against AIDS? They’re not trying to spread AIDS right? I mean, if you are trying to spread AIDS you would have pro-homosexual propaganda but if you’re trying to stop it….

Swanson: They may be serving lemonade too as part of the event, I hope not but maybe.

Buehner: I wonder what the Rose Bowl parade would do if we had the stoning of a homosexual along the parade just as an expression of free speech and all that.

What would happen? You’d be arrested for murder, you sadistic asshole. And of course, all this will lead to the murder of Christians if they aren’t allowed to throw gay people in prison (at the very least):

They are coming after Christians and if there is 45% of Christians in America or 45% of Americans who disagree with homosexuality or homosexual marriage, they will lose their jobs. That’s the goal, to make sure they lose their jobs, to make sure that they are persecuted, to make sure that they may even be burned at the stake. I don’t know what the whole agenda is but it seems to me that this may be a battle between good and evil and evil will not tolerate good. Good may tolerate evil to some extent but I think also we have to draw lines ourselves and encourage the civil magistrate to prosecute homosexuality, especially public acts of homosexuality. When Christians are a little wimpy addressing the issue of homosexuality, get ready friends, Christians will be destroyed by the other side.

Nope. You’re just going to lose the political battle. And you’re going to keep yelling and screaming about how oppressed you are because you’re no longer allowed to repress others. And we’ll keep pointing at you and laughing.

26 comments

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  1. 1
    Quodlibet

    “…encourage the civil magistrate to prosecute homosexuality…”

    Under what law?? Homosexuality isn’t illegal. Homosexual behavior isn’t illegal any more, either. What colossal ignorance.

    Me? I’m pro-family. That is, because marriage is a fundamental bulding block for many (not all) families. therefore, I’m in favor of marriage equality for all consenting adults. Marriage builds families.

    Why do they hate families?

  2. 2
    alanb

    That’s the goal, to make sure they lose their jobs, to make sure that they are persecuted, to make sure that they may even be burned at the stake.

    No, if they lose their jobs they’ll just become freeloaders and we’ll have to raise taxes in order to support them. Burning at the stake makes much more sense.

  3. 3
    Crimson Clupeidae

    Ed, I suspect that the moron in the quote didn’t actually want to have a real person stoned, but a scene depicting a stoning. I could be wrong, but I suspect that particular part was just poor communication on the part of the speaker (see: moron).

  4. 4
    Abby Normal

    When I saw some of the overwrought reactions to the marriage float I started fantasizing about a stoning float too. I wanted to put their bigotry on full, vivid display. Let the world see the malice they try to hide with their talk of Christian persecution, tradition, and family values. I wanted reveal the festering core of hate in all its terrible glory and then see who still wants to stand beside them.

    Of course I don’t really want anyone to get hurt and without that element the impact just wouldn’t be the same. But the fantasy was there.

  5. 5
    raven

    Why don’t they just pray?

    According to them, prayer is a powerful form of magic that can do anything, move mountains, cure disease, etc..

    Could it be that they don’t really believe their own babbling? Well sure. While practicing magic doesn’t do anything, tossing a few dozen big rocks can do a lot.

  6. 6
    raven

    It’s no secret that US xianity is dying. Killed by lethal ugliness and hate.

    1. The fundies are dumb but even they are catching on. The loot intake is down, a lot of churches are half full, and the members are getting older and older.

    2. And all they can think of to do is more of what hasn’t worked. People leave in order of best and brightest first. Leaving the dumb and the haters. From my vantage point of an insider now an outsider, they seem to be getting worse. More hate, more lies, more calls for xian terrorism, murder, and armed rebellion against the USA.

    And they can’t stop. It seems to be an essential part of their religion. No hate = No fundie xianity.

    3. US xianity is on trend to go below 50% by around 2030. It’s going to be a long and ugly next two decades.

    4. But it isn’t all bad. Fundie xians like the science haters, Swanson, Buehner, etc.. are our best allies. The fundies created the New Atheists.

  7. 7
    Modusoperandi

    Wylann “Ed, I suspect that the moron in the quote didn’t actually want to have a real person stoned, but a scene depicting a stoning. I could be wrong, but I suspect that particular part was just poor communication on the part of the speaker (see: moron).”
    Well, that’s much better.

  8. 8
    Mr Ed

    Religious oppression – not being allowed to throw rocks at people you don’t like

  9. 9
    Thumper: Who Presents Boxes Which Are Not Opened

    They are coming after Christians and if there is 45% of Christians in America or 45% of Americans who disagree with homosexuality or homosexual marriage, they will lose their jobs.

    What happens if it’s only 35%? Is that a small enough minority that us evil ones will let is slide, and they’ll be allowed to keep their jobs? And what if it’s 55%? Is that too strong a majority for us to deal with, or something?

    Just you wait ’til we have all your guns. Then it won’t matter how big a majority you have. MWAhahahahahaHAH!

  10. 10
    freemage

    Okay, this is horrible and all, but I just can’t get past that line about the lemonade. Are they… I dunno, thinking that homosexuals spread AIDS by giving out free cups of tainted lemonade, or is this some sort of obscure water-sports reference, or what?

  11. 11
    Thumper: Who Presents Boxes Which Are Not Opened

    @freemage

    Yeah, I was wondering about the lemonade reference too… I assume they’re afraid it’s all some clever scam to make teh eevil homos appear benign and friendly. Then again, they may very well be stupid enough to believe the lemonade will be AIDS tainted. Or maybe they believe teh gay is waterborne, like cholera?

    I don’t think we’ll get it. To catch a fundie, you have to think like a fundie.

  12. 12
    tsig

    So for Christians it’s “Let’s barbeque you before you barbeque us”.

    “Do unto others using fire and a dry rub”.

    “AS ye sauce, so shall ye eat”

  13. 13
    tsig

    Fundie response to a scary idea:

    “Let’s throw big rocks at it”.

  14. 14
    Thumper: Who Presents Boxes Which Are Not Opened

    @tsig #13

    PMSL :)

  15. 15
    John Pieret

    freemage and Thumper:

    Could they have been thinking of Kool Aid? If so, that’s pretty ironic, given the cultish behavior of the wingnuts, as opposed to that of the LGBT community.

  16. 16
    jnorris

    Next year’s Rose Bowl Parade will feature the Stoned Gay Person float from Colorado.

  17. 17
    Bronze Dog

    If it’s merely a depiction of the stoning of a gay person by throwing rocks at a mannequin, I still don’t see how they expect to win people over with it. With a dummy, yes, it would likely end up a free speech issue instead of a murder charge. When people start pointing out the barbarism inherent in stoning, the bigotry in targeting homosexuals, and the gleeful malice on the performers’ faces as they throw the stones, it’d become a Freeze Peach issue. We’d have one more horror to show people when the fundies claim to be speaking out of love, and they’d be scrambling to make people stop talking about it.

  18. 18
    abb3w

    A mock stoning would not, of course, be prohibited as murder. However, even having a mock-stoning might cross one of the few lines where the government may lawfully limit freedom of speech — in so far as it might be considered to “tend to incite an immediate breach of the peace” (in the form of advocating potentially immediate violence against homosexuals). Plus, of course, it might also lawfully be denied inclusion in the Rose Bowl by the corporate organizers — the parade is a private forum, where the owner’s freedom of association allows them the choice of what range of expression they wish to be associated with allowing.

    For what it’s worth, as of 2012 there indeed are approximately 45% of Americans (40% Christians plus 5% assorted others) who consider homosexuality “always wrong”. Why haven’t they lost their jobs and been burned at the stake already?

  19. 19
    Gvlgeologist, FCD

    Wait, this Christian is proposing (even theatrically) stoning teh Gay? Didn’t his god have something to say about “casting the first stone”?

    And why must it be theatrical? After all, those two gays really got married, didn’t they?

  20. 20
    a miasma of incandescent plasma

    …to make sure that they may even be burned at the stake.

    Most definitely, it’s 100% possibly. Maybe.

    Conservatives newest hit song when claiming persecution “Kill me, maybe”

    Swanson: They may be serving lemonade too

    It’s worse than that! It’s… Lemon-gay-de!!!

  21. 21
    dingojack

    Swanson: They may be serving lemonade too as part of the event, I hope not but maybe

    Aww. All they’ve got is Kool-Aid .

    Dingo

  22. 22
    a miasma of incandescent plasma

    OK, seriously, I think the 2 floats side-by-side would be great!
    But only with a big sign connecting them saying “Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, which scenario is more decent?”

    Let’s let them show the viewers what true malcontent oppressive assholes they really are.

  23. 23
    Ace of Sevens

    They’d have to make the stones from roses, so it wouldn’t be very effective. They may be better off trying a different parade.

  24. 24
    spamamander, internet amphibian

    @20

    I’m a Fundie
    So prob’ly crazy
    Make me a martyr
    So kill me maybe

    It’s hard to be
    Majority baby,
    So persecuted
    So kill me maybe…

  25. 25
    felidae

    When are they going to come out for stoning adulterers–I could see a float depicting Newt Gingrich getting the Biblically mandated punishment. O, wait if they stoned adulterers, they would kill off 1/3 of Christians and thier churches (and collection baskets) would be empty

    When

  26. 26
    leonardschneider

    “[I]f there is 45% of Christians in America or 45% of Americans who disagree with homosexuality or homosexual marriage…”

    Really. I guess the Episcopals, Methodists, Congregationalists, and Unitarians don’t count as christians. Oh, of course not, they don’t subscribe to your paranoid evangelical yahoo-dom.
    (I always wondered what these chumps would do with Deists like me if they ever came into power. Let’s see, the gays would be rounded up into “re-education” camps, the Catholics would be deported to… Ahhh…. well, they haven’t worked that out yet; I guess I’d probably be sent to the atheist internment camp, or forced to wear one of those movement-tracking ankle cuffs.)

    “…encourage the civil magistrate to prosecute homosexuality, especially public acts of homosexuality.”

    So apparently public acts of heterosexuality are fine and dandy, completely legal. Cool. I guess that means if my wife and I are bored, we can fuck on the bus.

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