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Fischer: God Put Me Here to Detect Truth

Bryan Fischer took his ego out for a walk on a recent show, telling his listeners that God put him on earth specifically to stop Satan from telling lies. “I am the truth detector. I am the truth promoter. My responsibility, I believe, what God has put me on this earth to do is to declare and to defend the truth,” he said.

Comments

  1. Chiroptera says

    “I am the truth detector. I am the truth promoter. My responsibility, I believe, what God has put me on this earth to do is to declare and to defend the truth…”

    “…by locking it away in a dark room camoflaged by a bunch of falsehoods.”

  2. John Pieret says

    I am the truth detector

    I said it the other day: in a way, he’s right. All you have to do is take anything he says and the opposite will, almost certainly, be true.

  3. Alverant says

    “I am the truth detector. I am the truth promoter. My responsibility, I believe, what God has put me on this earth to do is to declare and to defend the truth…”

    Well he should start doing his job instead of lying all the time.

  4. a_ray_in_dilbert_space says

    Actually, God put him here to find his ass with both hands and whatever technological aids he could muster. Maybe he will succeed eventually.

  5. theguy says

    The bastard’s business cards should instead say “Father of All Lies”

    If there really was a benevolent god, shouldn’t this sort of stupid be physically painful?

  6. D. C. Sessions says

    Some people hold the truth so high to avoid running into it.

    Similarly, Fisher has to recognize it to avoid it.

  7. freehand says

    I am the truth detector. I am the truth promoter. My responsibility, I believe, what God has put me on this earth to do is to declare and to defend the truth…

    “…that, or I just make shit up. How could I tell?”

    “Did I say that out loud?”

  8. bushrat says

    I am the truth detector. I am the truth promoter. My responsibility, I believe, what God has put me on this earth to do is to declare and to defend the truth…

    Just what Satan would say…

  9. caseloweraz says

    Immediately I read this, I muttered to myself, “So Bryan Fischer’s mission is to tell the truth…”

    No sooner had I uttered the mutter than the shade of Mohandas K. Gandhi appeared to me. “I think it would be a good idea,” he said. Then he vanished.

  10. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    Fischer : god-put me here to detect truth

    Well, he sure picked the wrong guy for *that* job then didn’t he?!

    ***

    “Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened.”
    – Sir Winston Churchill

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