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Nov 11 2013

Klayman Planning Another Wingnutapalooza

What’s the plural form of wingnut? I have no idea, so I’m going with gaggle, which is what Larry Klayman is planning for November 19 in Lafayette Park across from the White House when he amusingly thinks that “millions” of people are going to show up and not leave until President Obama resigns. Reality was never Klayman’s strong suit. The Worldnetdaily is promoting it, of course, and they have the lineup:

Among speakers scheduled, according to the Web posting, are Alan Keyes of Declaration Alliance, Pam Geller of Atlas Shrugs, Floyd Brown of Western Center for Journalism, Joseph Farah of WND, Joe Kaufman of Americans Against Hate, Klayman, Bradlee Dean of Sons of Liberty, Vincent Forras of Gear Up Foundation, Belinda Bee of 2 Million Bikers to D.C., Zeeda Andrews of Ride for the Constitution and Larry Ward of Constitutional Rights PAC.

Klayman told WND that Rep. Trent Franks, R-Ariz., former Republican congressman Bob Barr and Larry Pratt of Gun Owners of America also are scheduled to attend.

Now that is a lineup for the ages. Maybe Bradlee Dean can regale the gathered throng with his theory for how Muslims are more moral than Christians because they kill gay people. And Zeeda Andrews can explain that President Obama actually is Osama Bin Laden (think I’m making that up? I’m not. She actually said that). Larry Pratt can explain how Obamacare leads to sending Christians to concentration camps.

“Never before has such a widespread coalition been compiled to show peaceful, non-violent force, as in the days leading up to the first American Revolution. As our great Founding Father and second American president declared, ‘[w]hen the people fear the government, there is tyranny. When the government fears the people, there is liberty,’” said Klayman’s announcement.

Come on Larry, you can’t even attribute your fake quotes correctly. John Adams was our second president. This quote is attributed to Thomas Jefferson, our third president. And it’s entirely fake. Neither of them said it. Not that you’ll care, of course.

I can’t wait for this event to fizzle completely. They’ll have a few hundred wingnuts there and they’ll claim it’s tens of thousands.

36 comments

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  1. 1
    Ryan Jean

    What’s the plural form of wingnut? I have no idea, so I’m going with gaggle…

    May I suggest a Charade?

  2. 2
    Doug Little

    Is there going to beer and brats?

  3. 3
    Doug Little

    Is there going to be beer and brats? Dammit.

  4. 4
    Gregory in Seattle

    “What’s the plural form of wingnut?”

    Might I suggest “colony,” the same collective noun that is applied to ants, bats and weasels, among other critters? “Gang” (of turkeys), “flock” (of sheep) or “drove” (of swine, asses or kine when driven in a group) would probably be acceptable, too. If it is a neologism you are looking for, might I suggest a “clutch” (as in pearls), a “panic” or an “asylum”.

  5. 5
    timgueguen

    Ironically the rhetoric these creeps engage in may keep the number of attendees down. After all if you’re continually going on with some version of “They’re coming to get the Patriots!” some of your suckers might be afraid the roundup will finally start with this gathering.

    The fact so many of them are gathering in one place makes it a reasonable conclusion that they know they’re full of crap. After all if they’re really a threat to Obama being all in one place at once would make them a great target. Yet there they’ll be, warning the suckers that the big bad Kenyan bogeyman is going to take their guns and their precious bodily fluids “any day now.”

  6. 6
    Doug Little

    As for the plural form I like either an obstinancy, deceit, unkindness or murder. You can find more here

  7. 7
    Michael Heath

    Clearly this meet-up is of the Devil, otherwise Gordon Klingenschmitt would be giving the invocation.

  8. 8
    richardelguru

    Definitely a ‘wank’ of wingnuts

    Hey! Alliteration??!!!

  9. 9
    Subtract Hominem, a product of Nauseam

    What’s the plural form of wingnut?

    A confederacy of wingnuts.

  10. 10
    Loqi

    I believe the plural is a “derp herd,” generally led by a single alpha (known as a derp herder). The size of derp herds are usually estimated in the millions, though if you actually count them there are only 6. Occasionally multiple derp herders will temporarily merge their derp herds together to form a larger group, which is known colloquially as a Tea Party Rally, though the real word for it is an “incoherence.”

  11. 11
    Doug Little

    One internet to Loqi!

  12. 12
    catbutler

    @10 – would that make the folks forced to carry all of the misspelled signs Derpas?

    Many better above, but how about a ‘wrong of wingnuts?’

  13. 13
    keithb

    What non-violent demonstrations led up to the American Revolution?

    I would think the Boston Tea Party would be considered violent since it involved deliberate trspass and the destruction of property.

  14. 14
    dingojack

    Hey, when the evul gubbernment are out to get ya, what better way to avoid being rounded up and placed into ‘FEMA Camps’ than all gathering in one place, that’ll make it oh so much harder for them to find ya and round ya up.
    @@
    Dingo

  15. 15
    flex

    Oh, there are so many possibilities for collective nouns for wingnuts, gaggle seems a little tame.

    How do any of these strike you:

    A gurgle of wingnuts (referring to their skills in rational speaking)
    A rite of wingnuts (which does not sound all that derogatory when spoken)
    A whirlwind of wingnuts (Hosea 8:7)
    A whistle of wingnuts (too high-pitched for a rational person to hear)
    A bubble of wingnuts (potentially fetid)

  16. 16
    Nick Gotts

    A fringe.

  17. 17
    Moggie

    Americans Against Hate? I’m guessing this is some creative use of that preposition.

  18. 18
    rabbitscribe

    #17 Moggie: I just Googled them. In this context, “hate” is synonomous with “Islam.”

  19. 19
    John Pieret

    I can’t believe no one has offered “a babble of wingnuts” yet.

  20. 20
    brundlefly

    Oh, man. I hope this is televised. Comedy GOLD.

  21. 21
    M can help you with that.

    A froth of wingnuts? (Or maybe a frothy mixture?)

  22. 22
    tacitus

    amusingly thinks that “millions” of people are going to show up and not leave until President Obama resigns.

    It might seem as though they are not leaving until Obama resigns, but in reality they’ll be just waiting around until that bloviating windbag Alan Keyes has finished his interminable speech.

  23. 23
    Trebuchet

    I’d have to vote for “a dozen of wingnuts”. Because, based on past performances, that’s about how many will show up.

    Actually, thinking about it, I’d prefer not to call them “wingnuts”. Wingnuts are a useful mechanical component. These clowns are neither mechanical nor useful.

  24. 24
    Goomba

    Personally , I like the name given to a large group of Yaks; an Obstinacy of Wingnuts.

  25. 25
    freehand

    timgueguen: The fact so many of them are gathering in one place makes it a reasonable conclusion that they know they’re full of crap.

    I don’t know about that. I am under the impression that none of their thoughts actually talk to the others. You are attributing to them a degree of self-awareness not warranted by the evidence.

    Ever see a cat by the edge of the road as you drive toward it? It will often look nervous, jerk forward, stop, look more nervous, jerk several times, then, in a panic, dart right. in. front. of your car so you have to hit the brakes. For wingnuts, life is like that, only their car is imaginary.

  26. 26
    Area Man

    In fairness, that quote has also been attributed to Samuel Adams and Thomas Paine, who were also not the 2nd president of the United States.

  27. 27
    fifthdentist

    I feel stupider just reading the names of the speakers.

  28. 28
    jnorris

    As a writer in another of Ed’s blogs about this rally asked: where is the porta-potty contract for this event? A million people would require at least 10,000 little sheds. Someone in the MSM please call Mr Klayman out on this.

    Also, let me remind everyone that I will be selling funnel cakes at the North Entrance next to the Ammo Depot tent.

  29. 29
    Crudely Wrott

    As suggested by their endless tendency to “whip up the crowd” and “strike a blow for liberty”, not to mention
    “watering the tree of liberty with blood”, I suggest a flagellation of wingnuts. Especially since the greatest damage they do is to themselves . . .

  30. 30
    dingojack

    Perhaps a counter-protest should be set up under the newly formed ‘Humanist Anti-Hate Association‘. All the counter-protesters should wear dark blue tee shirts with the organisation’s initials prominently written in yellow Comic Sans.
    :) Dingo

  31. 31
    inquisitiveraven

    Well, obviously the plural of “wingnut” is “wingnuts”; what you’re looking for is the collective noun or if you will, the term of venery. Since, as Trebuchet noted in comment 23, a wingnut is an actual piece of hardware, I suggest something along the lines of “scoop” or “bag.”

  32. 32
    dono

    I propose the same collective noun I use for a gathering of corporate vice presidents: a circle jerk of wingnuts.

  33. 33
    Trebuchet

    Well, obviously the plural of “wingnut” is “wingnuts”; what you’re looking for is the collective noun or if you will, the term of venery. Since, as Trebuchet noted in comment 23, a wingnut is an actual piece of hardware, I suggest something along the lines of “scoop” or “bag.”

    Or perhaps a “blister-pack”.

  34. 34
    blf

    A cesspit of wingnuts.

  35. 35
    Pieter B, FCD

    I rather like “confederacy,” “drove” and “blister-pack.” “Derp herd” is more a descriptive than a term of venery.

  36. 36
    Pieter B, FCD

    And upon further reflection, why not just A Derp of Wingnuts?

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