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The Latest Faux Outrage: ‘Girly Hats’

Just when you thought the wingnuts couldn’t be any more ridiculous than they already are, we have the latest faux outrage from the right: Obama is going to make Marines were “girly hats” in an attempt to “emasculate the military.” Never mind that the entire story is false from the start.

The Worldnetdaily breathlessly links to a New York Post article that claims:

Thanks to a plan by President Obama to create a “unisex” look for the Corps, officials are on the verge of swapping out the Marines’ iconic caps with a new hat that some have derided as so “girly” that they would make the French blush.

The Thomas More Law Center quickly sent out a fundraising email with the headline “Obama Continues Efforts to Emasculate our Military; This time with a new “Girly” Hat for Marines.”

Even though an Army veteran, I have always admired the Marine Corps uniform and the history behind it. But now in an effort to further emasculate our military, the Obama administration has directed a unisex hat for the Marine Corps. The Marines I know would “rather fight than switch.” And despite the serious damage to our national security caused by force reductions and incomprehensible proposals like giving “medals for not shooting,” this new Obama directive has forced the Marine Corps to spend their time squabbling about fashion, hats in particular.

In a scene one would expect from the board room of a glossy fashion magazine, Marine Corps officials have been reduced to women in impractical shoes arguing about whether or not a proposed amendment to the Marine Corps uniform is “too French” for the US military.

The fashion debate comes as a result of an Obama directive to create a more unisex uniform for members of the Armed Forces. Currently, men and women wear gender specific uniforms and hats.

And now, a word from reality. First, this has absolutely nothing to do with Obama. The company that makes the women’s hat for Marines is going out of business, so the Marine Corps Uniform Board is debating whether to create a new hat for women or have everyone wear a variation of the old ones that men wear. They might know this if they read Stars and Stripes.

The story is sweeping the Internet: President Barack Obama is trying to emasculate male Marines by making them wear a girly cover with their famed dress uniforms. The only problem? It’s not true.

First, some background: Men and women in the Marine Corps currently wear different types of covers as part of their dress and service uniforms. The manufacturer of the women’s “bucket cover” – which has a distinctly different shape than the men’s cover – is going out of business and will not continue to make the cap, according to the Marine Corps.

The Marine Corps also has been asked by the DoD to find a unisex option for a dress and service cover, Marines said.

So, the Marine Corps Uniform Board, which meets quarterly, decided to gather feedback in advance of its meeting next week. Active and Reserve Marines were asked to vote on whether they believe women should adopt the current male cover, with some small modifications, or for all Marines to adopt what they call the Dan Daly cap.

Sgt. Maj. Dan Daly, a two-time Medal of Honor recipient who yelled, “Come on, you sons of bitches, do you want to live forever?” as he led Marines into the fight at Belleau Wood during World War I, wore a cap similar to the option proposed by the survey.

And the Marine Corps itself quickly tried to put out this raging fire of stupidity:

“The president in no way, shape or form directed the Marine Corps to change our uniform cover,” according to the Marine Corps statement. “We are looking for a new cover for our female Marines for one overriding reason: The former manufacturer went out of business. … The Marine Corps has zero intention of changing the male cover.”

In fact, if they’d read the Marine Times a few days before this freakout, they would know that the Marines are actually voting on which hat they prefer.

To gather feedback from both active duty and Reserve Marines, the Uniform Board distributed a survey across the Corps via sergeant majors that will run through Friday. The board will convene Oct. 29 and take the survey results into consideration, although they are not binding.

In fact, the real question here is whether female Marines will wear hats that look more like the ones men wear. So much for all that bullshit about “girly hats” and “emasculation.” Seriously, there simply is no limit to how ridiculous these people can be. They’ll freak out about anything as long as it serves their narrative and they just don’t care whether it’s true or not.

Comments

  1. Wylann says

    I think I saw one of the morons (probably an extended family member) on my FB post this. I will have to find it and link them to this post.

  2. Anthony K says

    The US might be missing a golden opportunity with this uniform change.

    Those Swiss Guard uniforms don’t look all that manly (which I assume means ‘John Deere trucker’s cap perched precariously atop unruly hair’), and I don’t recall any terrorists flying commercial jets into the Vatican.

  3. Alverant says

    Doesn’t it count as fraud to send a fundraising letter with misleading information on it?

  4. says

    Oh, please! They don’t just freak out over anything. There are only so many hours in a day. They have to carefully plan and parse out the bullshit things they’re pretending to be mad about. Freaking out over anything is ridiculous. Freaking out over a subset of anything takes commitment.
    Plus, when Marines choose to go to all the old-style hats, they’ll freak out over that, too, and they’ll have to simultaneously pretend to be mad over both stories, even though their chosen position for each (“Obama bad for X!” & “Obama bad for not-X!”) will be fundamentally incompatible. That takes real commitment.

  5. John Pieret says

    they would make the French blush

    Besides the fact that the “bucket cover” looks like the cap the Marines wore in WWI, have these morons ever seen the Kepi, worn by such famously tough guys as the French Foreign Legion? The bucket cover differes only in having a slight flare at the top.

    Maybe we should just start calling them buffoonnuts.

  6. scott says

    Colbert’s comment on this was beautiful. He showed a formal photo of Sergeant Major Daly in the Daly cap, along with his two Medals of Honor and Navy Cross, and said “What does he know about being manly? He’s wearing two necklaces and a brooch.”

  7. demonhauntedworld says

    Marine Corps officials have been reduced to women in impractical shoes

    Was this some kind of attempt by the WND to rip-off Robin Williams’ joke about the politically correct term for lesbians being “women in comfortable shoes”?

  8. says

    Every military hat I’ve ever seen, without exception, has looked spectacularly stupid. Why aren’t they complaining about that?

    If it isn’t macho enough for them, maybe they could get a small pair of those truck testicle ornaments and hang them on the back. It could hardly exacerbate the ridiculosity.

  9. janiceclanfield says

    Maybe they could just find a cheap manufacturer in China. The conservatives would like that because it would save money amirite?

  10. blf says

    John Pieret, I had a similar thought and was looking for good photographs to compare the current women’s cover, the French Foreign Legion’s cover(s?), and the Dan Daly cover, since the poor-ish quality images I’d quickly pulled up suggested they are rather similar. Then I saw your comment. Thanks for confirming my hunch.

  11. says

    Gretchen “Every military hat I’ve ever seen, without exception, has looked spectacularly stupid.”
    Well, it’s a good thing you don’t pick them. Because your taste is shit. There, I said it. You have shitty taste.

    “If it isn’t macho enough for them…”
    That’s what the guns are for.

    “It could hardly exacerbate the ridiculosity.”
    I exIt exacerbated my ridiculosity once. Had to get surgery. The doctors said I’d never play the vuvuzela again, so it was win-win.

  12. says

    I heard Obama is forcing the marines to wear sombreros so that when his Muslim Mexican army invades, they will be indistinguishable from the good guys and make his coup easier!!

  13. dugglebogey says

    One definition of conservatism is “terrified of change.”

    I think it’s the most accurate one too, wouldn’t you agree?

  14. Doug Little says

    Wow they must really be riding the edge if they think that a hat is going to emasculate the Marine Corps. All I see here is a bunch of bigots rattling some sabers.

  15. says

    Just imagine the outrage if the Marines were to adopt berets.

    THIS. Too French? Would make the French blush? The fucking Special Forces not only wear berets, it’s in their name. There’s even a song.

  16. says

    One definition of conservatism is “terrified of change.”

    More like, “terrified of doubts about their own masculinity.”

    This kind of shit isn’t new or surprising. Everywhere you look, conservatives are constantly worried that their manliness will be too weak to withstand attacks from girly hats, women playing sports, vegetables, or queers with good fashion sense.

  17. says

    The mention of the French is a wonderful mix of right wing dislike of the French, their dislike of Europeans in general, and homophobia. It’s part of the same narrative that has Europe all but lost to the Muslim hordes because they’re not macho enough, both to crush the Muslims and to outbreed them.

  18. says

    I hate to break it to these guys, but the military has been obsessed with fashion for awhile now. Not necessarily good fashion, mind you, but note how all the services insisted on having their own uniforms. The Air Force has tiger stripes. The Navy’s cammo is BLUE. And don’t get me started on what happens if you wear the wrong brand of boots.

  19. says

    I wonder how non-male-identifiying members of the Marines fell about being told that they have been “emasculated”?

    Although, taking the term in a certain way, I suspect that the gender conspiracy nuts have emasculated themselves by reducing themselves to infants. Somebody call a waaaaambulance.

  20. D. C. Sessions says

    Wow they must really be riding the edge if they think that a hat is going to emasculate the Marine Corps.

    Well, think about it. These guys obviously keep their nads in close proximity to their headgear.

  21. says

    “So much for all that bullshit about “girly hats” and “emasculation.”

    Damn, people! We’re looking at the exact opposite. They are going to putting “manly” hats on the lady Marines and ENmasculating them!! Phyllis Schittfly to the Pink Courtesy Phone, please.

  22. adobo says

    For suggestions on hats, the Marines ought to send someone to the Melbourne Cup races. They will love the display of horses asses paraded on the grounds having wine and cheese. Then they can see the real horses racing.

  23. Pierce R. Butler says

    Why hasn’t anyone linked to this yet?

    I thought all Marines wore combat helmets 24/365, except when eating out of them.

  24. shay says

    I haven’t had to wear one for over a decade, but the female Marine cover is not only ugly, it’s uncomfortable. The screw end of the EGA emblem is so placed that it digs a nice little hole in your forehead.

    However, I’m not sure wearing the male cover is going to be much of an improvement. Still, if lady cops can do it, I guess we can too.

  25. lorn says

    Those people are wiling to misunderstand virtually anything, even the simplest of issues, if it means they can use the non-issue to smear Obama. Of course their ability to demonize their chosen target is far more important to them then any actual damage done to whatever they are claiming to protect.

    This comes down to simple reflexive contrariness where obstructionism is a given with the reason/s offered assembled after the fact from existing anti-liberal talking points.

  26. chilidog99 says

    The key question is this: “do Marines still have the common curtesy to give reach arounds?”

  27. magistramarla says

    I think that the AF dress uniform looks great on the hubby, but I’ve always told him that BDU stands for bad, dumb and ugly.

  28. left0ver1under says

    a new hat that some have derided as so “girly” that they would make the French blush.

    Just like John Pieret (#6) noted above, I immediately saw the resemblance to the hat of the French Foreign Legion. The never-weres griping about the new marines’ hats are either ignorant of that, or they are fully aware and object to hats like those of the French. It’s not the “girlish” look they’re objecting to, it’s the French look, which definitely isn’t “girlish”.

    What’s the problem in wearing the hat similar to another military’s? Because the wingnuts don’t want the marines compared to another force with tougher training and standards than theirs?

  29. says

    @35:

    When I was in (during the era of biplanes and “Contact!” being shouted by the man at the prop) our dress unis were compared with bus drivers’ unis (unfavorably, I might add). We tried to never wear the damned things. fatigues were boxy but comfy, sort of like an O.D. leisure suit. My personal favorites* were 1505’s (summer lightweight khakis, basically) and the dress trouser, dark blue wool shirt with tie for winter wear.

    Lots of knuckleheads in the military are as fixated on uniforms as the teabag morons are on their Gadsden flags with about the same degree of understanding of their history.

    * “favorite” in the sense of making a virtue of necessity.

  30. Freodin says

    Good looking uniforms have disappeared after the 1800s. I vote for the reintroduction of kolpak (busby) and pelisse.

  31. Rip Steakface says

    All of these military hats look the friggin’ same. The only differences I see between the various choices are width of that top “brim” thing (it’s not a brim, but I can’t figure out a better name for the flaring).

    We should just have all soldiers wear mohawks as dress uniform and hair. That way they can look like some bizarre mixture of American Indian and ancient Greek dress, and they wouldn’t be a lick more ridiculous looking!

  32. Moggie says

    Anthony K:

    Those Swiss Guard uniforms don’t look all that manly (which I assume means ‘John Deere trucker’s cap perched precariously atop unruly hair’), and I don’t recall any terrorists flying commercial jets into the Vatican.

    Trouble is, that camo is only really effective if you’re defending a paint factory, or some kind of dessert-based engagement. Pretty specialised.

  33. says

    @40:

    I live in Oswego, NY and lots of people come up here to fish the rivers flowing into Lake Ontario for salmon, this time of year. I ran into a guy the other day, who had an out of state fishing license pinned to his vest. He was dressed in Mossy Oak camo and I asked him if he shouldn’t be wearing something in aluminum foil, so’s he’d look like the water. Fortunately for me he had a sense of humor.

  34. dingojack says

    Perhaps we should give the marines this, and let them choose the one they like best.Whirled Nuts Daily thinks is the most ‘manly’.
    Dingo

  35. dingojack says

    (Speking of ‘girly’ hats. Here’s a unusual photograph of a woman in a modified uniform of the ‘Death or Glory’ boys [17th Lancers]).
    Dingo

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