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Oct 18 2013

Ted Cruz Wins VVS Straw Poll

Every year at the Values Voters Summit (Jesus, I hate that phrase; the only “value” these people have is bigotry) they hold a straw poll for president. I’m sure it will surprise no one that Ted Cruz won the straw poll by a huge margin. Here are the full results:

Senator Ted Cruz 42%
Dr. Ben Carson 13%
Senator Rick Santorum 13%
Senator Rand Paul 6%
Senator Marco Rubio 5%
Congressman Paul Ryan 4%
Governor Mike Huckabee 4%
Governor Mike Pence 3%
Congresswoman Michele Bachmann 2%
Governor Rick Perry 2%
Governor Chris Christie 1%

Tony Perkins put out this bit of politico-babble:

“The Values Voter straw poll reveals what conservative, Republican-leaning voters are looking for in a potential candidate. Values voters are looking for those who will refuse to be bound by the ‘can’t mentality’ of the establishment and will challenge the status quo. In short, values voters, many of whom did not fully engage in the last election, are looking for a leader that will inspire them by challenging President Obama and speak clearly and directly to the challenges facing America.”

No, they’re looking for someone who will sell them the biggest helping of nonsense and extremism. And Ted Cruz is clearly that guy, at least for now.

46 comments

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  1. 1
    coragyps

    Cruz! Your Cuban-Calgarian 100% Amurican Candidate!!

    I don’t think they will advertise him like that…….

  2. 2
    colnago80

    Cruz is much better at demagoguery then the others, although Ben Carson, another very smart guy, may be a worthy competitor.

  3. 3
    raven

    Every year at the Values Voters Summit (Jesus, I hate that phrase;…

    It’s very Orwellian.

    Ignorance is Strength

    Freedom is Slavery

    Bigotry is Value Voting

    Hating gays and women are Fiscal Conservatism

    It really should be The Dark Side Voters Summit or The New Endarkenment Voters Summit

  4. 4
    holytape

    There should be a new term: The Ben Carson line. If you fall below the Ben Carson line, you are essentially less popular than a generic “Who the fuck is that?” candidate.

  5. 5
  6. 6
    Mr Ed

    P.T. Barnum couldn’t do better than Cruz with this group.

  7. 7
    D. C. Sessions

    In short, values voters, many of whom did not fully engage in the last election

    I see the Great Silent Majority is still dominating their planning. They’re telling Republicans to bet the farm on awakening the hordes of hard-right, God-fearing, gun-toting, white males who have been sitting out elections for decades now.

  8. 8
    Gregory in Seattle

    I really hope that, by the 2016 election cycle, the Tea Party has abandoned the Republicans and struck out as a third party. Maybe, just maybe, we can begin to drag the Overton window back towards the left.

  9. 9
    dogmeat

    In short, values voters, many of whom did not fully engage in the last election,

    This bit of denial is getting downright pathetic. The GOP, in 2012, did the second best they’ve ever done in a presidential election, 60,932,235 as compared to the 62,039,572 for Bush in 2004 (an election where exit polls showed more than three million self identified Democrats voting for Bush). If they had increased their total to that 62,039,572, they would have lost the ’12 election by only 3,877,685 votes. In other words, losing by only 4 million votes instead of losing by 5 million votes. Now I recognize that in Republican math that is a landslide victory for them, but here in the real world it still means they lost by 3% of the total vote.

  10. 10
    chimera

    Wikipedia says :

    The Overton window is a political theory that describes as a narrow “window” the range of ideas the public will accept. On this theory, an idea’s political viability depends mainly on whether it falls within that window rather than on politicians’ individual preferences.[1] It is named for its originator, Joseph P. Overton (1960-2003),[2] a former vice president of the Mackinac Center for Public Policy.[3] At any given moment, the “window” includes a range of policies considered politically acceptable in the current climate of public opinion, which a politician can recommend without being considered too extreme to gain or keep public office.

    I didn’t know this idea had a name. I’ve often thought in these terms.

  11. 11
    laurentweppe

    Jesus, I hate that phrase; the only “value” these people have is bigotry

    L’hypocrisie est l’hommage que le vice rend à la vertue

  12. 12
    Nick Gotts

    Bicarbonate@10,

    I think the “Overton window” is misdefined: it’s not what the public will accept, but the limits of discourse the establishment (OK, let me be frank, the ruling class) will allow to be taken seriously. For example, a poll in November 2012 found 39% of Americans questioned have a favourable reaction to the term “socialism”. How often do you see a positive view of socialism presented even in the so-called “liberal media”?

  13. 13
    dingojack

    And in other news. Gerald the Blobfish wins the Handsomest Blobfish within 50′ of Here competition in a landslide. Film at 11.
    Dingo

  14. 14
    Dr X

    Values voters are looking for those who will refuse to be bound by the ‘can’t mentality’ of the establishment and will challenge the status quo. reality.

    FTFY

  15. 15
    danrobinson

    Run Teddy run!
    Run like a fox!
    Run in a box

    Run Teddy run!
    Run in a hat!
    Run in a vat!
    Face plant go splat!

  16. 16
    caseloweraz

    Tony Perkins: “The Values Voter straw poll reveals what conservative, Republican-leaning voters are looking for in a potential candidate.”

    Yes it does: Greed, bigotry, religiosity, and a willingness to cast aside the national interest in favor of keeping his or her job.

    Did I miss anything?

  17. 17
    zero6ix

    We’re in primary season already? They’re already cramming useless straw poll data down our gullets? Geeze, it’s getting to be worse than Christmas. I played the “who are the republicans going to elect this week” drinking game last cycle, and my liver still hasn’t recovered.

    (You take a shot every time they change the front runner.)

  18. 18
    Modusoperandi

    The problem last time, you see, was that they didn’t bring out the clown car early enough.

  19. 19
    lldayo

    No Sarah Palin?

  20. 20
    Doug Little

    and speak clearly and directly to the challenges facing America

    Problem is their perceived challenges to America have nothing to do at all with reality.

  21. 21
    Doug Little

    The one guy who might have a shot is at 1% and considered a Democrat because he dared to shake hands and work with a black man. Bravo teabaggers, bravo.

    When do you think the great Republican schism is gonna take place? Is there any sensible conservatives left with a decent plan to eject the batshit insane element from their ranks, or at least neuter them into oblivion?

  22. 22
    Modusoperandi

    Doug Little “When do you think the great Republican schism is gonna take place? Is there any sensible conservatives left with a decent plan to eject the batshit insane element from their ranks, or at least neuter them into oblivion?”
    What do you do when the nuts you’ve been funding for decades both stop accepting your orders and no longer need your money?

  23. 23
    demonhauntedworld

    “The Values Voter straw poll reveals what conservative, Republican-leaning voters are looking for in a potential candidate. Values voters are looking for those who will refuse to be bound by the ‘can’t mentality’ of the establishment and will challenge the status quo

    So conservatives are those who want to overturn the establishment and challenge the status quo? That sounds like the opposite of a conservative.

  24. 24
    Doug Little

    What do you do when the nuts you’ve been funding for decades both stop accepting your orders and no longer need your money?

    Unilaterally invade and overthrow on the premise that they have access to WMD’s?

  25. 25
    daved

    What do you do when the nuts you’ve been funding for decades both stop accepting your orders and no longer need your money?

    Simple — you fund some more centrist candidates. It’s already starting. Though it’s not clear to me that the teabagger candidates no longer need the money. I suspect they still do.

  26. 26
    longstreet63

    That there is, I suspect, a list of the people who will eventually lose in the primaries to whoever is picked as the 2016 Romney. Quite possibly in the order listed.

  27. 27
    Doug Little

    to whoever is picked as the 2016 Romney

    Who would that be?

  28. 28
    longstreet63

    Who knows? Probably a republican governor.. Somebody who has not yet tainted themselves with the base of the GOP. Which is easy to do. They will need to exude a hefty sense of entitlement. Scott Walker? Some Bush or other? Liz Cheney?
    The Romney will be the person the Establishment republicans can tolerate, who can pretend to be a radical looney to win the primaries, but who they think can come off as moderate in the general election. This is handicapped by their definition of ‘moderate’ of course.

  29. 29
    longstreet63

    Although, as an Indiana resident, I’d like to encourage reality to please make Governor Mike Pence please go away and run for national office. He’s Santorum without the winning personality.

  30. 30
    Doug Little

    Somebody who has not yet tainted themselves with the base of the GOP

    but who they think can come off as moderate in the general election

    That’s the definition of futility right there. Ha Ha Ha.

  31. 31
    D. C. Sessions

    What do you do when the nuts you’ve been funding for decades both stop accepting your orders and no longer need your money?

    You spend your money in the primaries trying to overcome the organizational advantage that the most insane candidates have in churches and general appeal to the most radical wing of the radical faction — who are the majority of the voters in the primaries.

    When that fails and Daryl Issa loses the primary to a challenger from the right, you spend even more money in the general election selling him to the voters.

    The one constant is that no matter who the foaming-at-the-mouth primary voters nominate, your money will always go to support him, her, or it in the general election.

  32. 32
    blf

    Am I correct in thinking Governor Chris Christie is the only one on that list which might fail the test for being a bugnuts insane wacko?

    Assuming that is correct, it is perhaps telling that he is also in last place.

  33. 33
    blf

    s/which/who/

  34. 34
    raven

    and speak clearly and directly to the challenges facing America

    The main American challenge right now is the Tea Party christofascists. Things are going OK as we recover from the Bush Catastrophe, despite their active obstructionism. So they decided to destroy the USA to save it.

    Their shutdown attempt cost $24 billion. Plus the rest of the world now thinks, correctly, that we are an unstable nation. The USA likes to pretend it is a world leader. You can’t do that when Taliban-like crazies are fighting a low level civil war.

    Assuming that is correct, it is perhaps telling that he (Christie) is also in last place.

    That is what happened in the last election. John Huntsman was the only normal person GOP candidate. He came in last.

  35. 35
    Doug Little

    John Huntsman was the only normal person GOP candidate. He came in last.

    Yep.

  36. 36
    busterggi

    Okay, we’ve lost Bachmann and the pizza guy but this bunch will be just as entertaining to watch during the debates (if any) during the primaries – in fact, some sound awfully familiar, like well-practised losers from the last circus.

  37. 37
    D. C. Sessions

    John Huntsman was the only normal person GOP candidate. He came in last.

    More like “dropped out first.” I’m sure that sanity was a major count against him, despite his best efforts with the motorcycle ad.

  38. 38
    Modusoperandi

    D. C. Sessions, he would’ve won if the “Four days” ad was “John Huntsman will eat this motorcycle…in four days!” Well, maybe not won, but done better in the primary.

  39. 39
    eric

    Modus:

    The problem last time, you see, was that they didn’t bring out the clown car early enough.

    With a little fine tuning, I bet you could even get some GOPers to buy that argument. How about: they did not put enough faith in the political free market, which requires many competitors to produce the best one. The GOP primary race was insufficiently capitalist. ;)

  40. 40
    matty1

    They haven’t picked a candidate yet? Surely that Ronald Reagan cloning machine must be working by now.

  41. 41
    D. C. Sessions

    How about: they did not put enough faith in the political free market, which requires many competitors to produce the best one.

    Wrong definition of “free market.” A Republican market has as few players as possible, with each being free to do whatever they like.

    Surely that Ronald Reagan cloning machine must be working by now.

    Cloning, no. Reanimation, yes.

  42. 42
    d.c.wilson

    Yes it does: Greed, bigotry, religiosity, and a willingness to cast aside the national interest in favor of keeping his or her job.

    Did I miss anything?

    Dishonesty, arrogance, white skin, a penis.

    I think that covers it.

  43. 43
    imthegenieicandoanything

    I rather like them calling themselves “Values Voter” because the picture I get is of some poorly-made, ultra-cheap knock off that only a stereotyped cartoon hillbilly would ever consider.

  44. 44
    Ichthyic

    Is there any sensible conservatives left with a decent plan to eject the batshit insane element from their ranks, or at least neuter them into oblivion?

    if you want to know the answer to that, look towards the body BOTH parties tend to abuse when they want to get rid of troublemakers:

    The ethics committee.

    are the debating any specific member right now?

    I hear rumblings about Ted Cruz….

  45. 45
    Ichthyic

    John Huntsman was the only normal person GOP candidate. He came in last.

    he was done as soon as he asked his supporters to call him crazy for supporting the science on global warming and evolution.

    shockingly, that’s exactly what they did.

    :P

  46. 46
    democommie

    I can already see the ads that Cruz will be running for the general election.

    “Hi, my name is Ted Cruz. I won the primaries by being completely fucking insane and lying through my teeth. I will no longer lie to the MurKKKan people and will stop being completely fucking insane. You have my word on that.”.

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