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Sep 24 2013

Putin and the Argument From Childbirth

One of the dumber arguments offered up by bigots in opposition to marriage equality goes something like this: “ZOMG! Gays can’t have kids so humanity will die off if we let them get married.” The argument is utterly moronic, which is why it’s not the least bit surprising to hear Vladimir Putin hinting at it:

Putin says while some European nations have allowed gay marriages, “the Europeans are dying out … and gay marriages don’t produce children.”

He added that heterosexual couples should have more children to reverse a population decline, saying “let us make our own choice, as we see it for our country.”

Funny how the only one who gets a “choice” are those who want to oppress others. Gays don’t get any choice to be allowed to live their lives as they see fit. And that is justified with this astonishingly stupid argument from childbirth. Really? All Europeans are dying out? Even the ones from countries that don’t allow gay marriage? Gee, a rational person might think that undermines your argument — not that it needed undermining, of course. What do they think is going to happen here? Do they think that if they don’t allow gay people to get married, they’ll magically become straight, go pair off with a member of the opposite sex and start popping out babies?

Scott Lively thinks that if Russia keeps being a beacon of theocratic authoritarianism, American fundamentalist Christians will start emigrating there. I say we strike a deal: Russia takes all of our bigots and we take all of their gay people.

18 comments

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  1. 1
    tubi

    I say we strike a deal: Russia takes all of our bigots and we take all of their gay people.

    The only good Commie is a gay Commie?

  2. 2
    Chiroptera

    Yeah, if there are two things the world needs more of, its more carbon emissions and more people.

  3. 3
    Gregory in Seattle

    So couples that cannot or will not have children would be denied marriage too, right? And what about the civil rights of clergy, bound by vows of celibacy? (Russian Orthodox clergy can be married when they take holy orders, but they are not allowed to get married afterwards; bishops are always selected from among unmarried or widowed priests.)

  4. 4
    HappiestSadist, Repellent Little Martyr

    I’m a queer person in a straight relationship, and childfree by choice. Apparently my relationship is okay according to those weirdos, but my many gay friends who have biological kids of their own are somehow evil for not replenishing the population, except they are.

  5. 5
    colnago80

    Gee, I guess that means that Mary Cheney didn’t have any kids? Not.

  6. 6
    tbp1

    As if the world didn’t actually have too many people already.

    On a somewhat related note. I occasionally listen to the local Catholic radio station on my way to or from work, just to see what they’re up to. They talk about the “contraception mentality” almost as much as they do about abortion and gay people, and spend a lot of time talking about “natural family planning” is totally, and I mean totally, not the same thing as other forms of birth control. And on that day when the world supposedly hit the 7 billion people mark, the people on one of the shows were talking about incredibly great that was, something to celebrate. These were not stupid, uneducated people, either. One of those moments that just makes me think it’s genuinely hopeless, and really, really glad my wife and I don’t have kids (although we are terrified for our nieces and nephews).

  7. 7
    steve84

    Russian doesn’t have a birth problem, but a death problem. Their life expectancy is very low and the men are literally drinking themselves to death. If they could lower their death rate to that of many other western countries, their population would be sustainable.

  8. 8
    exdrone

    Of course, population decline can also be countered by immigration. That wouldn’t be another sore point with them, would it?

  9. 9
    carolw

    Where does Putin think gay babies come from? The Gay Stork? Under a Gay Cabbage Leaf?

  10. 10
    lofgren

    I think this is actually the stupidest of stupid arguments against homosexuality in general, and when used against gay marriage it ratchets the stupid up to Legendary Mode. Yep, even stupider than Satan wants you to be gay because anal sex makes it easier for him to possess people (a surprisingly frequent claim).

  11. 11
    CaitieCat, getaway driver

    I say we strike a deal: Russia takes all of our bigots and we take all of their gay people.

    Now THAT is a deal this Russian-speaking dyke would be willing to be an interpreter for. Usually I hate interpreting, it gives me headaches. But for that exodus? Sign me up as a volunteer.

  12. 12
    timgueguen

    Those kind of statements make you wonder how may gay people these jokers think there actually are. The “classic” number is Kinsey’s 10 percent. Some folks think it’s less than that, while I’ve read enough stuff over the years to suspect sexuality doesn’t fall into compact little boxes for many people. Having said that even if we assumed all gay people, upon the legalisation of gay marriage, suddenly decided not to get straight married, and hence not have kids, how many fewer kids would actually result?

  13. 13
    wscott

    I say we strike a deal: Russia takes all of our bigots and we take all of their gay people.

    I say we make this a new meme.

  14. 14
    Olav

    Vladimir Putin is a rather brilliant man (and a crook). He does not believe a word of this himself. He is just playing the rubes.

  15. 15
    zippythepinhead

    tubi@1: You win the internet.

  16. 16
    Francisco Bacopa

    Being gay is much more of a discovery than a choice, and I’m not even sure that if everyone turned gay (as if that could happen) society would die out. There’d be a birth dearth for a while and population would fall, but I am sure we could get back up to two billion in a while. That’s a much more sustainable population.

    Furthermore, what if everyone decided they had to become a medical doctor? All the sewage treatment plant workers start studying to take the MCAT. Cholera breaks out everywhere. Everyone now has studied enough to know the victims need to be kept cool and be given fluids and electrolytes. But water pressure is low and the power is going out as all workers have formed med school study teams that they attend for twelve hours a day Trucks no longer carry food, and no one is harvesting or processing food anyway, so that makes little difference. Society collapses within weeks.

    Clearly doctors are a bigger threat than gays as all doctor culture would perish, but an all gay culture would survive though they’d face a serious “demographic winter”.

  17. 17
    John Pieret

    Russia takes all of our bigots and we take all of their gay people.

    Heck, for that deal, I’d be willing to throw in the Brooklyn Bridge.

  18. 18
    maddog1129

    Plenty of gay people have biological children.

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