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The Worst Movies Ever Made

I came across this list of the 100 worst movies ever made and thought it would make an interesting discussion. There are some real doozies that are not on that list, like Eyes Wide Shut, a movie that makes you want to slip into a hot bath and slit your wrists. And I have no idea how Xanadu only manages to make #74; that’s a top ten bad movie for sure.

This list is of major movies, not independent B movies of the type that Mystery Science Theater 3000 typically made fun of. There’s no Plan 9 From Outer Space on there. Everyone knows that’s a bad movie. And it doesn’t include straight-to-video clunkers. This list is for movies with studio funding, movies that the people who made them actually thought were good. The #1 bad movie? Battlefield Earth with John Travolta. In fact, Travolta has three movies in the top 100 (so does Madonna, which is all the more amazing since she’s only done maybe a dozen movies in her life).

Showgirls is #2 and deservedly so. It was appalling in every imaginable way. And if you haven’t seen Nothing But Trouble, don’t do it without someone there to keep you from injuring yourself. Dan Aykroyd, Chevy Chase, John Candy and Demi Moore in a movie so thoroughly bad that it will make you want to gouge your eyes out with a plastic spork. Speaking of Aykroyd, I really have no idea how Doctor Detroit isn’t on this list.

And some of them, while terrible movies, are worth watching for some particular reason. Like Striptease, for example, has one redeeming quality. And no, it isn’t seeing Demi Moore naked. It’s seeing Burt Reynolds in boxer shorts and cowboy boots, covered head to toe in vaseline. His over-the-top performance as a dumb, sleazy congressman is worth the loss of brain cells that will result from watching the movie.

One thing that jumps out are the lack of movies starring Saturday Night Live alumni. You could make a top 100 worst movies starring only SNL alumni, for crying out loud. How do you make a list of the worst movies and not have any movies with Adam Sandler or Chris Farley in them? Not possible. Farley made nothing but terrible movies. And while Sandler’s done a few decent ones, you can’t possibly leave out Jack and Jill. For that matter, how do the Wayans brothers and Tyler Perry not hold at least half a dozen of the top spots?

There are a lot of movies on the list that are sequels, the worst of which has to be Caddyshack 2. And incidentally, I think Congress should pass a law requiring that all movie sequels including “: Electric Boogaloo” in the title.

Okay, your turn.

Comments

  1. Michael Heath says

    Two friends decided to never again trust my judgment on movies after we went to see Barry Lyndon based on my suggestion. That movie was helpful given it persuaded me to avoid movies starring Ryan O’Neal, who I associate with William Shatner without the charm or self-realization regarding the limit of his abilities.

    Re SNL deserving their own category: A Night at the Roxbury? I think not.

    Pretentious: <Magnolia

    Tom Cruise and Ridley Scott’s Legend.

    Also Twilight, which insults the intelligence of eight year olds with a learning disability.

  2. Michael Heath says

    Some comments on the linked list:

    I actually liked Showgirls, Swept Away, and Anaconda. Not loved, but give them 3 stars out of 5.

    Even Cowgirls Get the Blues was an impactful entertaining book by Tom Robbins, where I couldn’t get through the first few minutes of the movie.

    I felt violated after watching Indecent Proposal.

  3. tuxedocartman says

    I liked Nothing But Trouble. My contribution to the list: Nicole Kidman’s latest film, Stoker.

  4. jonlynnharvey says

    Although quite good in some roles, Julia Roberts was often horrible miscast at the peak of her popularity in misguided studio efforts to capitalize on her popularity. Which brings up the issue of movie #60, Mary Reilly, which had real promise and might have been much better if anyone, anyone other than Julia Roberts had been cast in the lead! It’s a Victorian British period drama, which JR simply can’t do!! She’s fine in Pretty Woman, but she is what ruins this otherwise good film.

    There’s apparently been a critical re-evaluation of Showgirls in recent times. It’s meant to be a satire about the moral bankruptcy of American entertainment, but the POV is so generically misanthropic that the satire doesn’t come through for most of the audience and it just seems like cheap exploitative trash. I wonder if some tweaking could have saved it, but I don’t want to see it again to figure it out.

    There’s also been a critical re-evaluation of Heaven’s Gate particularly re the original longer cut at the Cannes Film Festival. Now I have seen none of the many alternate edits of Heaven’s Gate, but I do think that the three-hour Cleopatra with Burton and Taylor is quite bad, but the four-hour version is pretty good, so the idea that the longer cuts of HG are better is at least very credible to me.

    Star Trek V: The Final Frontier is certainly the worst movie that was part of a popular franchise, as are a few of the later Jaws sequels. I tend to think ST5 It ought to be on the list.

    Spielberg’s 1941 is a miscalculated misfire that doesn’t get its target, but shows a lot of talent and thought. It might belong on the top 200 bad movies, but I would be a bit more generous to it.

    Ed Brayton, I think you are confusing unpleasant with bad when you castigate Eyes Wide Shut. It’s a deeply disturbing and unsettling move like much of David Lynch, but I certainly don’t regard it as bad film-making.

  5. otrame says

    Drop Dead Fred and Hudson Hawke do not belong on that list. Neither belongs on a “Best Movie List” either, but their inclusion makes me suspicious of the compiler’s sense of hunor..

    Besides, any worst movie list that does not include Omega Force near the top is deeply flawed. Barry Bostwick in pants so tight he literally could not walk in them. I’m willing to bet he was sterile afterwards. And headbands. Lots of headbands. Motorcyles with afterburners (no, really). Dialogue so bad that your ears start to bleed about ten minutes in. I could go on, but I am starting to have flashbacks. Number One on my list of movies that have caused PTSD.

  6. shouldbeworking says

    What does it say about my social life if I’ve heard of most of these movies only through lsts like thi? Somehow, the word ‘fortunate’ is not likely to be in the answer.

  7. ontariorod says

    No-one seems to have mentioned Moulin Rouge or Chicago.
    Turned them both off after about 15 min., as I almost felt nauseous!

  8. borax says

    What! Four Rooms doesn’t belong on this list. And otrame, Omega force is one of the best movies ever. That movie inspired me to wear a skintight jumpsuit, head band, and build a dune buggy equipped with a laser cannon.

  9. schism says

    Eh, the problem with these lists is the entirely subjective difference between “entertainingly bad” and “soul-crushingly bad.” When I saw Battlefield Earth, for example, I was laughing for, like half the movie. Laughing at it, granted, for having no idea how literally anything in the world works, but it was enjoyable all the same.

  10. Alverant says

    I saw Showgirls in the theater when it was released. But that was just because it was the first NC-17 film to be released nationwide in theaters. Basically I went for novelty’s sake. I have a hard time telling the difference between good and bad movies, but that was a bad movie but nowhere near as bad as “Nothing but Trouble”. That movie offended me on every level.

    The problem with lists like these is that there’s no objective way to really say movie X is better than movie Y. It’s all a matter of opinion. Maybe Battlefield Earth spoke to a movie viewer in a way Gone with the Wind didn’t so it was a better movie. Of course GwtW should be on the list too IMHO.

  11. otrame says

    @borax,
    I’m sorry to hear that.

    @everyone else,
    See what I meant about PTSD?

  12. slc1 says

    One of the problems with the list is that movies from the 1940s, 1950s and 1960s are completely missing. There were certainly some stinkers from those years. In particular,The Night of the Hunter, the only movie directed by Charles Laughton, was, IMHO, the worst A list movie ever made. It’s a cult movie and the cultists apparently dominated the ratings over at IMDB, giving it an 8.2 rating.

    Interestingly enough, Jaime Leigh Curtis claimed that Virus, in which she starred, was by far the worst movie she ever made and she has been ashamed of it and refused to watch it ever since. It didn’t even make the list.

  13. matty1 says

    And no, it isn’t seeing Demi Moore naked. It’s seeing Burt Reynolds in boxer shorts and cowboy boots, covered head to toe in vaseline

    And still you claim to be heterosexual [jk]

  14. sprocket says

    Eyes wide shut?!?!

    Anyone who would put a Stanley Kubrick film in the top 100 hasn’t seen enough films.

  15. dantalion says

    They seem to be ranking them as the worst based on them being the most notoriously bad. I don’t approve of that methodology. Some movies were expected to be better than they were, some were hated by critics or audiences disproportionately to how much the movie sucked. Some just strike a nerve so hard they become enshrined as the go to examples of bad movies. Not the same as being the worst.

    For example, while Showgirls was a worthless concept executed very poorly, it isn’t anywhere near the 2nd worst movie ever made. What it would be without the notoriety is completely forgettable. What it is, is the movie which is 2nd most famous for being bad. Right behind Battlefield Earth, which may actually be the worst movie ever made.

  16. says

    “Cool World” could have been good if Ralph Bakshi had been allowed to film his original vision (it was supposed to have been a horror film about cartoons coming to life after having sex with “real” people). The producers basically rewrote the story under his nose and that mess of a film is what resulted.

  17. says

    Ed, you seem to have missed “It’s Pat, The Movie”, starring SNL alum Julia Sweeney as the titular androgynous character she played.

  18. Larry says

    Humbly submitted for your consideration:

    Waterworld – Kevin Costner

    Gymkata – Kurt Thomas

    Smokey and the Bandit 2 – Burt Reynolds

  19. jamessweet says

    I really don’t understand the acrimony for Eyes Wide Shut. It’s not even the least enjoyable Kubrick film (*cough* Barry Lyndon *cough* — which I stop short of calling a “bad” movie, but it’s got a lot of really long boring parts that are really not much fun to watch). As sprocket says, even if you have a low opinion of Eyes Wide Shut, coming up with 100 films that are indisputably worse should not be much of a chore. I mean, they made no fewer than FIVE Scary Movie films… you’re 1/20th of the way there already!

  20. Alverant says

    On escapistmagazine.com Jim Sterling does a video series called “Movie Defense Force” in where he takes a horrible movie and makes the case that it’s not really as bad as some people think. He’s done Waterworld, Street Fighter, Freddy vs Jason, Alien 3. A lot of it comes down to changing your expectations. Like if you view Alien 3 to be a dark comedy about corporate culture, then the movie makes more sense (according to him, I haven’t seen it so I can’t say). So if you turn off your brain and don’t expect much, some of these bad movies wind up being entertaining.

  21. says

    The bad Barry Bostwick film mentioned above is actually called Megaforce. I saw it in the theatre when it came out, and even as a less than critical teen I thought it was pretty bad. The blue screen bit with Bostwick’s character riding a flying combat cycle is bad even by 1981 standards.

  22. thomasmorris says

    I agree that it’s not a particularly interesting list, but I can’t say I agree with quite a few of the suggestions here either. (Which is perfectly all right – different strokes and all that.)

    First of all, Heaven’s Gate and Ishtar don’t belong anywhere near the list – they’re merely mediocre movies (with occasional moments of goodness) whose early reputations have forever doomed them to unjustly being placed on such lists.

    I’ve only seen it once (so I probably can’t be counted as a “cultist”), but I thought Night of the Hunter> was pretty wonderful. It has some of the creepiest scenes I’ve ever seen in a film, some pretty wonderful cinematography, and a great performance by Robert Mitchum. It’s a weird movie with some bizarre tonal shifts, but I’d definitely watch it again.

    I’m not a big Kubrick fan, but I don’t think any of his films would belong (not even his very early, very stilted and awkward Fear and Desire.) I’d actually rank Barry Lyndon as one of his best. It’s one of the few films where O’Neal’s inexpressive acting actually fits the character he’s playing.

    As for movies I consider bad… I think it’s more interesting when it’s about more acclaimed/popular films or films by generally liked filmmakers, rather than trash Z-movies that almost no one saw or liked (and which I tend to avoid.)

    Some movies that would go on my personal “Bottom 100″ (accepting that there are films that are objectively far worse technically and otherwise):

    Ones that I found completely insufferable even though they’re by directors that I usually like: Gus van Sant’s Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Robert Altman’s Quintet and Prêt-à-Porter, Tim Burton’s Dark Shadows and Planet of the Apes, Fellini’s And the Ship Sailed On.

    Braveheart, District 9, 300, and the first Transformers movie are popular favorites that bored the hell out of me (and, in the cases of the last two, gave me terrible headaches.)

    Dogtooth, Buffalo ’66, and Friendly Persuasion are some critically acclaimed films that I despised.

  23. says

    otrame is right: “Drop Dead Fred” should not be on that list. It was a decent movie for its genre.

    What I don’t see are ridiculously awful disaster movies like “The Day After Tomorrow,” “2012,” “The Core,” and “Knowing,” the last of which reminds me that any Nicholas Cage movie should have to prove it doesn’t belong in the 100 worst. (“Raising Arizona” can easily do that. The rest? I’m not so sure.)

  24. says

    otrame “Besides, any worst movie list that does not include Omega Force near the top is deeply flawed.”
    First, It’s “Megaforce”.
    Second, clearly you’re allergic to awesome.

  25. says

    Ok, first of all, Pokemon and Scooby Doo? Those were awesome movies when I was a kid. Whoever wrote that list has no childhood.
    Second, I’m amazed nobody has mentioned War of the Worlds (the one with Tom Cruise) as a terrible movie. I watched the first hour and went to bed with a headache. They might as well have called it Little Girl Screaming for Two Hours. As loud as possible, incessantly, right into the mike. Add that to the lack of plot (aliens kill people, and people run away) and the annoying characters, none of whom you could relate to, and you have the perfect recipe for a terrible movie.

  26. thomasmorris says

    @slc – I think one of the reasons you’re less likely to see older movies on a list like this is simply because a lot of the absolute drudge from more than 40 or 50 years ago has been forgotten. There certainly were a lot of awful movies made in the 40s, 50s, and 60s (and earlier) – Sturgeon’s Law has always applied – but a lot of them have been lost to time. Either they’re sitting in some archive somewhere, likely to never see the light of a public screening again, or they’re literally lost.*

    The older bad movies we do remember tend to be the Z-grade trash by Ed Wood rather than the formulaic forgotten-the-moment-you-leave-the-theater programmer starring Tab Hunter.

    *For a long time studios didn’t archive their films, so a disturbing number (around 50%) of films made between 1930 and 1950 are considered lost, as well as about 90%+ of silent films.

  27. ambulocetacean says

    Freddy Got Fingered does not belong on that list. It is an exceedingly original and funny movie, and both Tom Green and Rip Torn are terrific in it.
    .
    Battlefield Earth is quite possibly the worst movie I have ever seen. It actually ruined the first few seasons of Sons of Anarchy for me because every time I saw Kim Coates in SOA it reminded me of that Scientologist POS.

  28. yoav says

    Look like it was last updated in 2006, given the piles of badly made crap Hollywood’s been putting out in the last 7 years (looking at you Michael Bay) most of these won’t make it to the top 100 in an updated list.

  29. erk12 says

    My suggestion usually really annoys some people: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. It’s the only movie I wanted to walk out of (my friends wouldn’t leave), and fully half the theater actually did walk out.* I knew nothing of Hunter S. Thompson going in to it, the only thing I got out of it was Johnny Depp mumbled a lot and there was something about sex with an underage girl.

    I realize he has two on that list but “Every movie made by Pauly Shore” should have an entry.

    *OK, there were 10 or less people in the theater.

  30. Michael Heath says

    Larry writes:

    Smokey and the Bandit 2 – Burt Reynolds

    Never saw it, because the first one was easily one of the worst movies I suffered through. Smoky and the Bandit was also one of the most over-rated movies I encountered, though not nearly as over-rated as Star Wars.

  31. Konradius says

    Showgirls was directed by Paul Verhoeven and got a raspberry award. He personally picked it up. What I remember from the speech (it was televised in the Netherlands on the news at the time) what that it meant he had really made it in America: people didn’t only notice the successes but also the failures.
    As to the satirical message of Showgirls; Paul often goes over the top to satirize or criticize.
    Showgirls I know not too well, but take Starship Troopers. This movie can be seen as a not very good action movie. But you should listen to the directors commentary. He wants to show how fascistic the notions of the story really are.
    The original book was by Robert Heinlein, it advocated a limited government where voting rights depended on having fought in the military.
    Point is that Paul Verhoeven often has problems with a version of Poe’s Law. He tries to go over the top, but instead the viewers take his movies at face value.

  32. Hercules Grytpype-Thynne says

    Ed, you seem to have missed “It’s Pat, The Movie”, starring SNL alum Julia Sweeney as the titular androgynous character she played.

    Also Haunted Honeymoon with Gilda Radner.

    I looked at that list and I’m pleased (I think) to say that I’ve only seen 6 of them. I’d put in a good word for Popeye: not a good movie by any means, but it did have at least one amusing bit, where Olive Oyl is singing a love song about Bluto and the only positive thing she can think to say about him is that he’s large.

  33. says

    Michael Heath “Smoky and the Bandit was also one of the most over-rated movies I encountered…”
    Yeah. I still can’t believe it swept the Oscars that year.

  34. macallan says

    What, no Transformers – Revenge of the Fallen? I couldn’t watch it for more than a few minutes and I actually (kinda) like some ( ok, very few ) of the movies that made it on the list.

  35. Gvlgeologist, FCD says

    Otrame, I’ve got to disagree with you about Hudson Hawk. The only reason I didn’t walk out is that my friends kept saying to me, “It’s got to get better”. When we finally left (after seeing the entire POS), we walked out into the parking lot, where we heard OTHERS saying, “I would have walked out, but I thought it would get better”.

    I can’t believe Red Dawn didn’t make it to the top 100.

    Dune is at #182, and it’s a guilty pleasure for me – I thought it accurately portrayed the mystical feeling of the book.

  36. dingojack says

    One that comes to my mind is that excruciatingly awful war movie ‘The Thin Red Line‘* (1998), Directed by Terence Malick.
    Dingo
    ——–
    * Spoiler: not a hint of Colin Campbell anywhere in the movie.

  37. Jane Roe says

    Coming in at #182 is Dune. The list doesn’t say which one, but that’s OK. They’re both equally bad.

  38. voidhawk says

    Oh! And ‘The Exorcism of Emily Rose’ which had the potential to be a great courtroom drama about a priest arrested for killing a girl during an exorcism. It could have been a great look at the consequences of belief.

    Instead it was a really boring horror flick whereby the lawyer for the prosecution starts getting visited by the demons too, making the whole court half of the movie pointless.,

  39. Gvlgeologist, FCD says

    In the OP link, there’s a link to the 100 BEST movies (and a lot of other movie lists as well). I’ve never seen it, but I noticed that Barry Lyndon is there, in the 2nd 100. Just thought I’d mention it for you that say it’s one of the worst. I’ve never seen it, so I’ve got no opinion, but it’s interesting to see the diversity of opinions.

  40. savagemutt says

    I love Popeye non-ironicaly. I love the songs and it was just about perfectly cast. And I love the very detailed world Altman created for it. I’ve never understood why its so maligned.

    Maximum Overdrive is a guilty pleasure of mine. its so incredibly idiotic but also funny in a tasteless way that makes me want to turn off all the lights and close the blinds when I watch it.

    And Ishtar isn’t horrible. Its just a two-star comedy that got a lot of negative attention for its runaway budget and the fact that very little of the budget made it to the screen.

    I have spoken authoritatively. All must bow before my mighty opinions.

  41. kermit. says

    What? Why was Wild Wild West on there? Granted it wasn’t a classic, but it was pretty much what I expected, and I enjoyed watching it. It was certainly in the spirit of the TV show. Surely nobody was expecting Citizen Kane.
    .
    Now, I’m surprised that nobody has mentioned the Twilight series of movies. My wife rented the first because she was “curious”, she said. But I couldn’t force myself to watch it; I read a book in its presence for a while but soon left for the other end of the house. Romance novels on film for twelve year-old girls. And what a horrid example for the girl fans it is; the protagonist is utterly weak and shallow.
    .
    Speaking of kid movies, the American Pippi Longstocking was a disaster. Besides poor acting and direction, they actually had Pippi apologize for causing trouble at the end of the movie! Our daughter considered the Swedish (Inger Nilsson) dubbed Pippi to be her role model, and a good choice it was. That Pippi is unflappable, strong, and unapologetic.

  42. caseloweraz says

    I’m pleased to see Leonard Part 6 on that list (#12). I’ll never figure out what Bill Cosby thought he was doing in that bomb of a movie.

    Nit: There are some title misspellings in that list: “Balistic” and “Judge Dread”. Maybe that’s why the notes at the bottom of the list have the word “editor” in quotation marks.

  43. Michael Heath says

    kermit @ 45 writes:

    I’m surprised that nobody has mentioned the Twilight series of movies.

    Uh, me at @ 1:

    Also Twilight, which insults the intelligence of eight year olds with a learning disability.

  44. Moggie says

    How is Barb Wire not higher in this list? A film starring Pamela Anderson was never going to be great, but this one appeared to be based on Casablanca. Casablanca with fake tits. The sacrilege alone should be worth a bump up the ranking.

  45. jaxkayaker says

    I’ve never seen Striptease, but I read the novel it’s based on, and it’s excellent. Carl Hiassen is a national treasure.

  46. slc1 says

    Re Thomasmorris @ #28

    I am afraid we will have to disagree, hopefully not disagreeably, about Night of the Hunter.. I suspect that the heavy religious overtones were what soured me on it. Interestingly enough, there have been claims that Laughton couldn’t stand children and that the scenes with the two kids were directed by Mitchum. This has been disputed, however.

    I actually once got into a pickup touch football game with one of the child actors, Billy Chapin. Billy, his sister Lauren and his brother Michael were sexually abused by their father, truly a scumbag from scumbagville. Billy’s career was over in 1958 at the age of 15. Pretty rough when one’s career is over at 15. Lauren’s career lasted somewhat longer until the drugs caught up with her. All three of them ended up doing drugs and in drug rehab.

    Interestingly enough, many of the films from that era have been rehabbed and are now available in HD, particularly films directed by Alfred Hitchcock and films starring Humphrey Bogart. The HD versions of Rear Window and The African Queen are worth the price of admission.

  47. lancifer says

    I challenge anyone to sit through Heartbeeps. (1981, Andy Kaufman and Bernadette Peters as lovestruck runaway robots.) The only movie that has ever compelled me to go to the ticket window and ask for my money back. They did.

    Battlefield Earth was a masterpiece compared to Heartbeeps. At least it was unintentionally funny.

    I add my name to the list of people that don’t think that Eyes Wide Shut is a bad movie. It wasn’t Kubrick’s best movie, but it certainly isn’t among the 100 worst movies ever made.

  48. Reginald Selkirk says

    ontariorod #8: No-one seems to have mentioned Moulin Rouge or Chicago.
    Turned them both off after about 15 min., as I almost felt nauseous!

    I never saw Moulin Rouge, but I saw Chicago and I liked it. Hey, it’s a musical. If you don’t like musicals, just say so.
    .
    One movie I felt like walking out of was Dogma, directed by Kevin Smith.BORING!

  49. Reginald Selkirk says

    Oddly missing fro the list: Aliens vs. Predators (2004).
    .
    This dreck showed many of the categorical weaknesses of movies designed to sell video games, in which senseless shit happens to stir the action every so often; my example is the corridors all rearranging themselves every 10 minutes. Silly stuff.
    But on top of that, if you’re going to appeal to obscure archaeological trivia, at least do your effing homework!
    Continuing on the same example, when the corridors move the second time, the archaeologist looks at his watch and says, “Aha!” Because it happened exactly 10 minutes after the first one. And this has something to do with the predators having initiated the Aztec civilization, which used a base10 numbering system.
    Why this is dumn:
    1) It assumes that the predators, coming from their own planet, would have used a unit of time which clearly arose on this planet.
    2) The Aztecs didn’t use base10, they used base20. They could have scored massive geek points if they had gotten that one right, and they totally screwed it, the lazy fucks.
    The entire rest of the movie is equally stoopid.

  50. eric says

    The Highlander sequels…any of them. I have never seen a theater empty like that.

  51. CONWAY says

    I will defend 1941 to the death. I’ve watched it at least once a year since it came out and I still laugh all the way through it. Slim Pickins, Warren Oates and Wendi Jo Sperber are the MVPs in a stellar cast. The movie also has the single best sight gag I’ve ever seen in a movie: An army tank crashes through the wall of a paint factory, then crashes out the other side covered in bright, primary colors. It then crashes through the wall of a turpentine factory. It crashes out the other side clean as a whistle. All done full scale, mind you. I love this movie.

  52. kermit. says

    I’m surprised that nobody has mentioned the Twilight series of movies.

    Uh, me at @ 1:
    .
    D’oh! I plead brain damage from seeing some of that movie.

  53. kermit. says

    Ronald Selkirk@54
    .
    I was also unaware that the Aztecs used time units exactly one minute long.

  54. jonmilne says

    I could have blinked and missed them if they are actually on the list, but the fact that none of the Star Wars prequels, or even the Star Wars Holiday Special, make it on the list, is absolutely staggering.

    Also add “Cyberbully” to this list. A promising movie that could really deal with the topic of internet bullying in a heartfelt and deeply meaningful way, and we get one of the most offensive campaigns to limit free speech from the same guys who thought of SOPA as well as one of THE most unsympathetic lead characters ever and way too much Narm – see “I can’t get the cap off!!” – and the most predictable reveal about who was bullying her.

    I also second the Twilight movies call. Did Lindsay Lohan’s movie where she plays twins make the list? If not, how is that possible?

    Oh, and Ed, you do a disservice to Plan 9. When I see Plan 9, I think “Aw bless!”. Ed Wood did the best he could with an insanely limited budget, and while the acting is cringe worthy, it’s also one of the most hilarious films of all time. As is any film by Ed Wood How can you NOT find the following exchanges in his movies brilliantly funny?

    Lumpy Human: “Why is it so important that you want to contact the government of our Earth?”
    Effeminate Alien: “Because of death! Because all you of Earth are idiots!”
    Human: “Now, you just hold on, buster!”
    Alien: “No, you hold on!”

    “For a time we tried to contact them by radio but no response. Then they attacked a town, a small town I’ll admit, but nevertheless a town of people, people who died.”

    “The smut picture industry is more dangerous than kidnapping or dope peddling!”

    “Modern women… They’ve been like that all down through the ages.”

    “Is this the transvestite’s home?”
    “Well, if that’s what you men of the medical profession call a man who dresses in ladies’ clothes, then yes.”

    (vice cop, looking at confiscated pornography) “These aren’t dancing girls, that’s for sure… I’m sorry, that was in bad taste.”

    “Don’t worry about Lobo- He’s as harmless as a kitchen!”

    (Over stock footage of buffalo) “Beware… Beware the green dragon that sits on your doorstep… He eats little boys. Puppy dog tails! Big fat snails! Beware… Take care… Beware… PULL THE STRINGS! PULL THE STRINGS!”

    “Greetings, my friends. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I shall spend the rest of our lives! And remember, my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future!”

    “I vill create a race off atomic supermen… And zen, I VILL DESTROY ZE WORLD!”

    “Show me a violent crime, and I’ll show you a [dirty] picture that could have caused it!”

    “Inspector Clay is dead… murdered… and someone’s responsible!”

  55. addiepray says

    “Dreamcatcher” features Donnie Wahlberg as a retarded alien named Mr. Gay.
    And Morgan Freeman with enormous eyebrows.
    Jesus Christ bananas what a fuckaroo.
    Oh yeah, and monsters that crawl out of people’s asses. “Shit weasels,” Freeman calls them.

  56. leni says

    Sin City is the only movie that ever made me throw valuable snacks at the TV and actively root for the main character to die. Honestly, I don’t remember why I hated it so much, but at some point I just decided every single one of those black and white motherfuckers needed to die.

    Twilight at least made me laugh. Once.

  57. says

    I haven’t seen a lot of the movies on the list, but I have seen Showgirls and Howard the Duck, which are numbers 2 and 3 on that list, and I have no trouble of thinking of at least two movies that are easily worse than both of them. One is Independence Day, condemned by its absurd premise, hokey acting, and predictable plot. Another is The Passion of the Christ, a plotless piece of violence porn with unintelligible dialog in modern Latin and some sort of gibberish that is supposed to be Aramaic.

  58. petemoulton says

    Red Dawn doesn’t come in until #124; therefore, I can’t take this list seriously.

  59. says

    The Time Guardian Carrie Fisher and Dean Stockwell in an incomprehensible sf film. After leaving the cinema, none of us could remember any character’s name. Made in Australia to take advantage of a tax break, and it shows. Fortunately my friends and I got to see it on a season ticket at the ANU film group, so no money was harmed.

  60. dan4 says

    Bless the Child isn’t a classic but it certainly doesn’t belong on the list of 200 of the worst movies ever made (it’s #117). It has a fairly compelling good-vs. evil story, a pretty effective cameo by Christina Ricci, and a kickass villain in Rufus Sewell.

  61. Pseudonym says

    There are several types of film that I don’t think belong on this list.

    First off, any film which was ruined by mismarketing. It wasn’t on the list (or mentioned here), but Coneheads is a good example. It wasn’t a masterpiece by any means. However, it was an extremely dry satire which was marketed as a SNL screwball comedy. No wonder people hated it!

    The same goes for Drop Dead Fred, which to this day is incorrectly categorised as a “children and family”-type movie in the DVD store.

    Oh, and Popeye falls into this category too. Especially since that was partly an experimental film (like most of Robert Altman’s films), and hence isn’t in in the same league.

    Speaking of not being in the same league, I firmly believe that novelty songs do not belong on lists of all-time worst songs. There are films (e.g. Hudson Hawk) which are the film equivalent, and hence don’t belong on this list.

    Then, there’s the “so bad it’s good” film. We can all agree to disagree on which films fall into this category.

    Finally, there’s the film which is bad as a film, but is still extremely important because of what its existence means and says about society. No, I don’t mean Jackass, I mean Independence Day. Like it or not, ID (or something very much like it) needed to be made at that point in history.

  62. gerryl says

    I can’t personally judge any of the movies on that list because I never saw them — except one: Shining Through. And it is, indeed, probably the worst ‘major’ motion picture I have ever sat through. My eyes hurt when I start thinking about it. (I got a free ticket from a radio station, what can I say.)
    Its closest competition was The Toy (Richard Pryor and Jackie Gleason !?!) which I saw in Japan because I had a friend who managed a movie theater and let me in for free.
    Moral of the story seems to be free movies are often worth exactly what you paid to see them.

  63. davecook says

    Some of these films were box office travesties at the time, but weren’t really that bad. The Postman was not great film making — and like some other Kevin Costner vehicles, thouroughly mockable at times– but I thought it was still pretty entertaining (ditto Waterworld).

    And no, Barry Lyndon does not belong on this list, you Philistines. One of my favorite films, and I’m not generally a big Kubrick fan.

    Night of the Hunter is a great film nearly ruined by the ending that Laughton was forced to tack on.

  64. caseloweraz says

    Pseudonym: “Finally, there’s the film which is bad as a film, but is still extremely important because of what its existence means and says about society. No, I don’t mean Jackass, I mean Independence Day. Like it or not, ID (or something very much like it) needed to be made at that point in history.”

    I take you mean that the alien attacks stood in for terrorist bombings like the 1993 World Trade Center incident, and our successful response was a way to boost morale in Western societies.

  65. says

    “Some movies that would go on my personal “Bottom 100″”

    I’m sorry but that “Bottom 100″ thing is already copyrighted. It’s a collection of closeted GAYGOP porn.

    “Point is that Paul Verhoeven often has problems with a version of Poe’s Law. He tries to go over the top, but instead the viewers take his movies at face value.”

    A former film critic for the Boston Globe, Jay Carr. opined that “Starship Troopers” was the best piece of fascist propaganda/moviemaking since Leni Riefenstahl’s, “Triumpjh of the Will”.

    “I’ve never seen Striptease, but I read the novel it’s based on, and it’s excellent. Carl Hiassen is a national treasure.”

    Mr. Hiaasen was asked about that movie in an interview I recently heard on NPR. His diplomatic response to people saying that Hollywood fucked it up, big time (a belief which I also hold) was that they, “made a movie.”.

    “One movie I felt like walking out of was Dogma, directed by Kevin Smith.BORING!”

    Odd, as an ex-Cath-O-Lick, I thought it was fucking hilarious, especially the bit about the Bishop’s (George Carlin’s) golf clubs being “sacred” and capable of killing demons.

    @58:

    I loved the dance scenes in “1941″ (particularly Treat Williams being outmanned by Ms. Dexheimer on the dance floor). The house sliding into the Pacific at the end of the film was pretty well done, too.

  66. says

    “I take you mean that the alien attacks stood in for terrorist bombings like the 1993 World Trade Center incident, and our successful response was a way to boost morale in Western societies.”

    Yes, AND killing every motherfucking one of them bastard alienz!!!

  67. beezlebubby says

    Ed, please go easier on Xanadu. The music, especially the ELO songs, was great. Yeah, the plot was bad, the writing horrible, and the acting wooden, but 75% of the budget was spent on cocaine.
    I must be the only person alive who enjoys, and re-watches, Hudson Hawk. The sight gags and puns are great. My favorite line is when a mobster proclaims “Hey, I don’t know much about art, but I know what I like”, as the camera cuts to an oil-on-velvet Dogs Playing Cards. That’s pretty fucking funny!

  68. caseloweraz says

    Democommie: You might like to know that two sequels to Independence Day are in the works. The first is scheduled for release in July 2015 (per Wikipedia.)

  69. Loqi says

    The Twilight movies. Or at least the one I saw (the things I do for friends when their boyfriends are being assholes…). I went in thinking it would be a total crapfest, but….I was not prepared. I expected a bad movie, not a 2-hour anti abortion commercial.

  70. Matrim says

    *shrugs* I find little use in these sorts of lists. They seem to serve only to make certain people feel smugly superior for agreeing the with list, infuriated for the list not agreeing with them, or smugly superior for the list not agreeing with them. The mainstays are always there (Battlefield Earth, Showgirls, Howard the Duck, etc.) with a few forgettable films that most people don’t remember thrown in to keep the list from seeming entirely contrived (Problem Child, Mary Reilly, etc.)

    I much prefer lists that basically amount to an unordered selection of movies claimed to be bad and WHY they are bad. I don’t care that you think Best of the Best is a bad movie, I care why you think it’s a bad movie.

    I rarely find any good conversation springing from things like this. Generally it’s variations on the themes “I can’t believe they put X above Y!” “I can’t believe they forgot X!” and “X isn’t as bad as all that!”

  71. Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :) says

    I’m surprised Cutthroat Island didn’t make the bottom 100 given that I seem to be the only person on earth who actually really enjoyed it.

    One of the problems with the list is that movies from the 1940s, 1950s and 1960s are completely missing.

    They were too busy making The Only Good Movies Ever Made Now Get Off My Lawn!

  72. says

    Konradius –

    …take Starship Troopers. This movie can be seen as a not very good action movie. But you should listen to the directors commentary. He wants to show how fascistic the notions of the story really are.

    But it’s bad satire. Simple example: in the book, a trainee asks why they are training to use knives when they have nukes. The drill sergeant discusses controlled use of force; that violence is intended to further policy when necessary, not as a policy itself.

    In the movie, a trainee asks why they are training to use knives when they have nukes. The drill sergeant throws a knife through the trainee’s hand, and says, “Hard to push a button now, eh?”

    I’m not advocating the system of government in “Starship Troopers”. (Not at all.) But if you’re going to satirize something, you have to point out or exaggerate actual flaws in what you’re satirizing.

  73. says

    Sin City is the only movie that ever made me throw valuable snacks at the TV and actively root for the main character to die. Honestly, I don’t remember why I hated it so much, but at some point I just decided every single one of those black and white motherfuckers needed to die.

    Probably because the pointlessly godawful visual effects made you want to gouge out your eyes?

  74. says

    Savagemutt @44:
    I too enjoyed Maximum Overdrive, though the last time I saw it was in the late 90s. I wonder how much I would like it today.

    Agreed about Popeye.

    Haven’t checked out the list, but I wonder how many Uwe Boll movies are on there.

  75. says

    Matrim:
    I agree with you.
    I used to think compiling lists like this was good, but taste in movies being so subjective, simply listing them doesn’t do much other than show ones preferences. I would much rather know why someone did or didn’t like a movie.
    For instance Batman and Robin was the first really bad movie I had seen. It treated the source material with disrespect. It had horrible dialogue. It contained far too many characters to do justice to any of them.

    Though I did not despise it, X-Men: The Last Stand was annoying because it tried, and failed to bring the Dark Phoenix Saga to the big screen while also trying to use Joss Whedons ‘Cure’ story. It resulted in a disjointed film.

    The second Twilight movie was the first movie I ever walked out of…and I got to see it free. The overwrought melodrama, the dialogue, the vapid characters…it was all too much. And that was before I realized that Stephanie Meyers infusion of Mormon theological beliefs in the novels followed into the movies. The none too subtle racism of a group of First Nations people treated as monstrous and unsophisticated really pissed me off. Learning that the climax of the whole movie franchise involved a ‘Who shot JR’ twist made me dislike the series even more. So too did the idea that it is ok, desirable even, for women to fawn over a stalker. Or for people to emulate a character who gets swept along throughout the movies and has no backbone and has no desire to do anything beyond be with her stalker and have a baby with him…at all costs. Yeah, no anti-choice propaganda there.

  76. says

    The “Twilight” movies were absolutely wretched — and the sterile, sparkly lily-white quasi-Mormon vampires were only the beginning of the wretchedness. Even before I saw the first ads for the last movie, I was wishing Buffy would just pop in and stake every last one of them.

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